Put on your best and get ready to roll out the red carpet (unzip 'em, Paddy) because it's time for the 2010 MT awards!

Copy the following and paste it in your post with your results. Multiple nominations are accepted.

Members:
* Most Irritating Member
* Least Irritating N00b
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole
* Most attractive

General:
* Best Avatar
* Best Signature
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence.
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life.
* Most likely to go to hell

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2009
* Biggest Cunt

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Members:
* Most Irritating Member - Dystopia
* Least Irritating N00b - Nomad
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch - Reqtum

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole - Everything we do is just and is spoken to us by God.
* Most attractive - Me.

General:
* Best Avatar - Paddy, only because it changes with the seasons.
* Best Signature - Mine, after edited by Paddy.
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence. - Nihilist, FBS, and where the fuck is Chris?
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life. - Reqtum, and TD of course. Those pictures are so photoshopered.
* Most likely to go to hell - PST, because all Jews go to hell

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2010 - Dysdopia's thread on how we should install "Drug Towns" or whatever the fuck he was talking about. Christ. Seriously? Or maybe his open letter to Bill O' Reily.
* Biggest Cunt - LBX

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Members:
* Most Irritating Member - Dys
* Least Irritating N00b - D&Q or Blitz
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch - LB

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole - PST even though he's sexy
* Most attractive - Dyldo

General:
* Best Avatar - Dyldo
* Best Signature - no idea
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence. - metal=life
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life. - Reqtum no doubt
* Most likely to go to hell - TD because he will like it there

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2009 (2010??) - Dys. I vote for him in this category for the next 10 years
* Biggest Cunt - Paddy

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Members:
* Most Irritating Member Requiem
* Least Irritating N00b Wapbamboom
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch Requiem. For real, fuck you.

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole Paddy
* Most attractive Chris

General:
* Best Avatar Paddy
* Best Signature LB'XXX
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence. Infinity.
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life. Requiem
* Most likely to go to hell Dyldo cause it'd be cocky to nominate myself now would it.

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2009 YOUR_GOD_IS_DEAD. Just to fuck up Dystopia's unanymous victory.
* Biggest Cunt I want those Avenged Sevenfoldfans back. Requiem.

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Didn't Infinity get banned? I can't remember. I might be mistaking him for someone else. And I totally forgot about the Avenged Sevenfold fans.

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Yup, over this

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Oh shit, I totally forgot about him.

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Wait when did I get flamed?

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Members:
* Most Irritating Member Nobody really irritates me, but Dyldo gave me crabs so I guess that's as good a nomination as any
* Least Irritating N00b There were new members this year?
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch Reqtum

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole Sane, even though he was neither here nor an unreasonable Nazi Arsehole
* Most attractive Dyldo. You know it, I know it and Dyldo's priest sure knows it too

General:
* Best Avatar Mine, you Manc bastards
* Best Signature Any signature with quotes attributed to Reqtum
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence. Sane. God damn, man, stop crying over your inevitable Ashes defeat, pull your kettlebell out of your slack back-minge and get back here
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life. Truth Devoid. All those pictures he posts are trawled from various bodybuidling sites. He's really a 14 year old boy with an ironic haircut who can easily fit into skinny jeans. Seriously, Reqtum bursting through his shirt Alien-style has to be the most hilarious thing I've ever read, machismo-wise
* Most likely to go to hell All of us, the Devil does have the best tunes after all. If only one of us can gain entry then it has to be Paddy for reasons too myriad to explain here

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2010 The iwrestledabearonce thread, if that was this year
* Biggest Cunt Lady GaGa? Oh, sorry I thought you said biggest cock. In that case, how about Paddy's anal cunt?

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Members:
* Most Irritating Member - I pretty much just talk to Dydlonic and Ginger on here, so I guess one of them
* Least Irritating N00b - L'B
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch - I know I'm repeating myself, but I honestly don't pay attention to what most of you guys post.

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole - Cumboy. Scouse is the new Nazional Socialism
* Most attractive - Jim. I've met him and Dyldo both in person, and one was a heaping bag of pussing wounds, and the other was Australian.

General:
* Best Avatar - mine, courtesy of Ginger
* Best Signature - Dyldo's, after I fixed it
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence. - Chris. I know where Jim is, and he's too busy to talk to you
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life. - Dyldo, not because he's overtly macho but because there is a gaping hole where his balls should be. A gaping, prolapsed asshole.
* Most likely to go to hell - Paddy. Because Gingers are the Midwich Cuckoos, but without any of the hive mind capabilities. That I'm aware of.

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2009 - 09, eh?
* Biggest Cunt - L'b's, because bobpurgis went through there, and he's enormous.

Fixed. Ass.

And I think I'm better looking than Jim. If we had a stare off and the loser was whoever got a stiffy first, I'm sure I'd lose. However, that doesn't mean he's better looking, it just means that I'm probably more gay. Gay!

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Members:
* Most Irritating Member: You. Yeah, I'm talkin' to you, ya cunt.
* Least Irritating N00b: I can only assume "noob" is short for "Nubian", in which case it'd have to be Chris, pretty much by default.
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch: There are people here whom I consider little bitches, but by virtue of them being little bitches I almost certainly don't have a favourite, no more than I have a favourite venereal disease (syphilis).

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole: The only banning/suspending to have taken place for a long time was when I handed Dysentery his own ring-anus to him skewered on a hot dog which was also his thin penis. So I guess it'd have to be johncumley.
* Most attractive: If I'm ever in the mood to be fucked by Sam from I Am Sam JoeYngVai would be top of my list of candidates. Not only does he look like the completely fuckable Sean Penn, but he's also a slavering retard which makes oral sex just fantastic. Unfortunately he's not a mod, so I'll just have to remain celibate until he's promoted to a mod position, preferably one which was made vacant by the sudden and extremely violent death of MetalThrashingMad (SHE'S MINE, BACK OFF YA BIG FUCKER YA).

General:
* Best Avatar: Bobbi's, because it reminds us where "our troops" actually come from and better informs us in our decision about whether or not to support them.
* Best Signature: Like PST I have also chosen Dylan's, because of the sweet edits I've made to it. Second prize goes to Bobbi's, because it features me at my most profound.
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence: Chris, definitely. Everyone else who was a regular and has now fucked off doesn't even enter my consciousness, but Chris' absence has left me empty, hollow and empty. More importantly his absence, and the lack of friendship we share as a result, has also left me without plausible deniability when someone calls me a racist. I just hope Dylan remains an active member so my raging homophobia continues to go unchallenged.

Also bunny.

* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life: PST. He doesn't act macho in the traditional sense, but he makes up for his lack of physical prowess by paraphrasing large sections of his Ladybird Book of Cooking in order to pass them off as his own and score chef points off of poor culinary spastics like me.
* Most likely to go to hell: Bobbi. Much like in the mafia, if you vouch for someone who turns out to be a rat you get whacked along with him. Bobbi has put in so many good words for me with the big guy that she's gonna be in hell long before they even begin to process my paperwork.

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2010: Wolfsherz's cystitis. It's especially awesome because he got it from his girlfriend, and it's even more awesomer because she got it from me. Not via sexual coitus; I just decided to lend her my Burt Reynolds signature toilet seat without washing it first. To be fair, it wasn't clean when I unscrewed it from the toilet of a swimming bath in Belfast either. Not sure what I was doing there, I just woke up with a bleeding anus and decided to use the toilet seat as a cum-shield and to fend off moustached body-builders as I made my escape, and the rest is [Wolfsherz's medical] history.
* Biggest Cunt: All yo mamas', because my willy is massive. I know what you're thinking, especially if you're PST, "but that's just a slight variation on PST's one!" But the thing you have to remember is that you're a cunt. Not as big as yo mamma's, but a cunt is a cunt, and you're definitely an "a", therefore you're a cunt. I'm sure Mansley will explain my workings, but suffice it to say that you're definitely a cunt.

I propose adding a "wall of text" award for this or next year, but it is pretty obvious who will get it

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A long time ago, it was a guarantee that I'd win that award.

I'm more laconic now.

And I'm sure you were more attractive before herpes took over the totality of your visible flesh and syphilis degraded your mind, Dyldyl, but the fact of the matter is that Jim is an immaculate hunk of manhood and you are a walking 10th grade Health class poster crowing the upsides of abstinence.

Just because my atrophied muscles can't rip through my shirt like Reqtum's doesn't mean I'm not manly in my own right. I can rip through other men's clothes pretty damn fast.

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You'll be glad of my text walls when the blacks try to take over.

I agree, if by "laconic" you mean "a penis face".

Weird, I felt a tiny twinge of guilt for that unprovoked if hilariously accurate dickism, whereas all previous conversations with you have just left me wishing I was illiterate. Does this mean...I...like you?

Hell no, ya fuckin' Je...ahh...it hurts...fuck, that tears it - I'm in love with you. I'd scream it from the rooftops if I wasn't so afraid of outside places.

How the fuck did that happen?

Its the Jew brainwashing. Also, did you know that Richiepoo is a vegetarian?

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Haha does Rich look like Sage Francis? If so, FUCK! That's not how I pictured him at all. I pictured him more like this:

http://i53.tinypic.com/10eeoeu.jpg

Is this where he got the idea for serving his clam chowder through a shower nozzle?

After millions of years of evolution, people become vegetarians. It makes my brain misfire. They should be more afraid of the pharmaceutical supplements they have to take than meat.

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'I'm more a penis face now' is not grammatically correct. Just as I'd expect from the Irish. I don't know why you'd have to wish to be illiterate. It'd be like Martin Lawrence wishing to be black, or Jim wishing to be from an irrelevant country, or Dylan wishing to be inflicted with an STD.

I do look like Sage Francis, if he had a more manly beard. And not a more Mansley beard, because that would just be gay. (Dylan had a Mansley beard the last time he visited Scousetown. He neglected to wipe it off for about a week, until they forced him to when he passed through customs. It was a brief, but serious, international event)

I had to look up laconic. I thought it had to do with onion milkshakes. Maybe that's something to whip up in a blender for people you hate.

Okay, funny's taken precedence over vulgarity, but I still don't like that word.

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WHOA I missed that. Link please

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I was just throwing some korv on to cook and realized we might want to have a "First to earn a political seat without a priest involved" for Amadeus.

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And an emo award for me for flaming about my situation here the whole time. Did I mention my dad's now stuck to a dialysis and won`t come out of hospital before...ehm June?
I totally deserve this award. PLEASE

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It struck me, as I read the list, that I'm not really well informed enough to fill it out. The paradoxical tearing back and forth between regret and joyous relief is excruciating.



I don't get it.

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Members:
* Most Irritating Member - bls or req
* Least Irritating N00b - D&Q
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch - req

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole - sane
* Most attractive - Fearfrost, srsly. i run the looks dept.

General:
* Best Avatar - pst
* Best Signature - truth (the lizard part, i had somwthing to do with it... )
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence. - Me haha
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life. - bassb
* Most likely to go to hell - atif

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2010 - dys, ten million pot threads for the ban
* Biggest Cunt - paddy

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I don't think I've ever filled one out just for that reason.

But the Where are they now? Tulvox. He must have gotten swallered up in a Minnesota snowstorm.

You don't get it? That's the most hilarious thing you've ever said!

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This.

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You're, like, so penis-facy.

Irish? It's only as vulgar as you want it to be!

He's probably already there; I'm pretty sure he suicide bombed a Metallica gig a few years back. No one noticed.

I wish. At least if I was the biggest cunt I'd have a certain degree of prestige. As it stands I'm not even a very good cunt. I'm really more of an overqualified twat. Dylan taught me everything I know in that department, which is weird because he has yet to teach me anything HE knows.

"Paddy, you know the capital of Gibraltar"
"Do I? Fuck, cheers!"
"..."
"..."
"So...did you know that you also know your seven times tables up as far as x 11?"
"Dang, I wish I had known I knew that when I was doing my maths GCSE"
"..."
"Fuck off, you make the place look untidy"
"Cheerio!"

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Yeah.. its either you or TD. Real men don't own cameras.

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Being concerned about your dad's health and wanting to talk to people about it isn't emo. Being German and not hating Jews - now that's emo.

Haha. Glad I came back around to catch this. Cocksuckers.

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Members:
* Most Irritating Member - Dysuria, quite obviously.
* Least Irritating N00b - Me. I want a fresh start. Granted, I still have the powers to delete your threads and ban you outright, but I've been born again.
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch - I would really like to see Tranny fight Requiem to regain his position, but this is like two straight years he's lost the title.

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole - Credit2DemidicitheElder. Fucking joo.
* Most attractive - Me. This is undeniable.

General:
* Best Avatar - Mine, because it reflects my tastes, which are invariably better than yours.
* Best Signature - Mine, because it reflects my creativity and sense of humor, which are on a level only God, GZA, and Glacius from Killer Instinct can transcend.
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence. - Me. Not because I've been gone for very long (in fact, I've checked in at least twice a month the entire time), but simply because I missed me so very much.
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life. - That pussy Jim. Remember when he used to post pictures and pretend he could sort of bend plastic spatulas from Family Dollar and rip 18 page high school newpapers in half? What a faggot.
* Most likely to go to hell - PST, on two counts of perpetuating jewdom; jewdom by thought, jewdom by word, jewdom by deed- THREE counts of perpetuating jewdom! Jewdom by thought, jewdom by word, jewdom by deed, jewdom by action- FOUR counts of perpetuating jewdom!

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2010 - dysmenorrhea's drug town/O'Reilly threads.
* Biggest Cunt - Dyldo definitely has the biggest cunt. Seriously; I can't even feel it anymore, though he claims he does. Rumors of his full name being Melvin Dyldstein, however, are unsubstantiated, as Rich swears he's never seen him in Temple.

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Sorry, I didn't read any of that; I don't talk to strangers.

Or blacks.

I'll give you some candy. Want candy?

Also, my puppy is lost. Can you please help me find it?

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Chris and his pet weiner dog........

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Colin...no, sorry, Connor...no wait...CHRIS! That's it! Alright, Chris, I'm Paddy, the one with the huge cock who's probably your third cousin or some shit, I don't know if you remember me but I'm sure it'll all come flooding back when you read through our third-person word war in the YouTube thread. Anyway, to answer your question:

Yes. Yes I'd like some candies please. If I find your puppy do I get extra candies? Man, I loves me some candies. I'm not a big fan of watermelon Jolly Ranchers however, so you can keep those for when you wanna lure the ghost of Gary Coleman into your cum jacuzzi. Do you have any potato bubblegum? Oh no, wait, that's just another name for my thick, chewy cumblobs. Nevermind.

I've missed you. Please stay. Please.

lol gtfo

:P

THIS PLACE TRULY NEVER DIES!!!

HI CHRIS!!

i cant BELIEVE the dude who was struggling through the abysmal BTS muck and mire is still posting like 7 years later. and nihilist. and john mansley? why dont you run the IMF by now!?

do i win an award by coming back?

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I could have sworn I saw you in the MIA's, but I just burned my eyes scanning these 2 pages for nothing.

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What's the MIAs? He was more on SMNnews

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What the hell are the MIA's? And the IMF's? I HATE BEING LEFT OUT!

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FUCKING ACRONYMS

SHIT

When does voting for tabbies end this year?

great place, you post there? or do you just read it. or have we argued on there? hahahaha

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The MIA's stand for Missing in Action. Don't feel bad. I figured that one out about 3 seconds after I hit the submit button.

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IMF = International Monetary Fund

The reason I'm not heading it up is a chronic lack of ambition!

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Members:
* Most Irritating Member: Dystopia.
* Least Irritating N00b: Gomli.
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch: Req, but not because I treat him that way.

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole: I have to go with FBS on this also, even though he isn't here anymore. And I can see right through Paddy... he so sweet on the inside!
* Most attractive: LOL! But yea, Dylan (he bribed me).

General:
* Best Avatar: Paddy's edits to his avatar sealed the deal.
* Best Signature: I really couldn't care less about that.
* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence: Too many at this point. I'm most curious about FBS.
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life: Truth. The 14 year-old story is not a rumor (but please don't kill me for saying that?).
* Most likely to go to hell: PST for obvious reasons, but I'd put Paddy up there for my vote.

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2010: Dystopia drug threads (especially the drug town) without a doubt.
* Biggest Cunt: Hmmmmm... I'm gonna give a vote to Dylan, Paddy, and PST. Just because they're moderators.

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Later tonight I'll close it up and get a tally.

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I thought it stood for Inglish Mudder Fucker. Either that or Insatiable Millwall Fan which is so obviously what you are, ya fuckin' passive aggressive football hooligan ya!

Do you know what E.T. is short for?

'Cause he's only got little legs!

That's what yo' mama said after I split her cervix.

@JoeYngLovely: I am sweet on the inside. I'm all filled with yummy caramel, as you'll see for yourself in due course.

Here are the results. For people who nominated more than one person, I just used the first nominee.

Members:
* Most Irritating Member - Dystopia (4)
* Least Irritating N00b - DQ (2), Chris (2)
* Everyone's Favorite Little Bitch - Reqtum (6)

Moderators:
* Most Unreasonable Nazi Arsehole - FBS (2)
* Most attractive - Dyldo (4)

General:
* Best Avatar - Paddy (3)
* Best Signature - Dyldo (3)
* The "Where Are They Now?" Chris (3)
* The Keyballs Award, for biggest gap between online machismo and real life. - Reqtum (4)
* Most likely to go to hell - Paddy (3), but with PST in a close second. Voter fraud a likely cause.

And the Big Ones:
* Best Flaming of 2009 - Dystopia (5)
* Biggest Cunt - Paddy (4)

New 2010 Awards (I decided who won these because I won most attractive):
* Best Thread - Paddy and Dylan break-up thread
* The Great Wall of Text - Paddy, usurping PST's crown of text.

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This has been my sole aim for the past 6 years. Now I can stop.

I wouldn't have voted our thread as the best, because even a fictional break-up with you is too horrible to bear. I don't like to hold grudges but I still wish everyone on this forum several malignant tumours of the soft tissues for voting for me to leave. Absolute cunts.

D&Q, JoeYngVai and Dame-NotInLoveWithSteveBecauseILovePaddy-FraMorkum are still on my cyber hug list for either refusing to vote or for voting for Dylan to FUCK OFF. I give a virtual hug to each of them every day I log on, and occasionally Dame doesn't cyber-tase me or e-mace my eyeballs, mainly because of iPity.

Done and done.

I may have not voted but I ripped on both of you really hard ( I was very convinced)

http://metaltabs.com/forum/showthread.php?t=56302

everyone is a tool

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Ahahaha I forgot we had a fucking poll.

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I'd happily join Dylan in a vat of boiling lead if those were the only means by which I could watch him melt, and being ripped alongside him afforded me a similar pleasure, so your place on my hug [see: dry hump] list remains! Although, to be honest, we kinda deserved it for that thoroughly indefensible episode haha.

And for the record, I'm not pretentious, I'm big boned

A fucking poll? Is that like a pointing stick or a fishing hole?

I honestly believe I'd have won had you not introduced the idea that I had stolen money from several other mods. You're craftier than bunny when she's scrapbooking the innards of goats during her pagan rituals. Always one step ahead, which is a hereditary condition in your family because your great, great grandfather had a foot growing out of his stomach.

I'll tell you, Tranny; it's because I've been so overwhelmingly successful in my endeavors that I still post here at the age of 26. My life is awesome and I'm practically a millionaire. I mean, not financially a millionaire, but in other ways. For example, the IRS is after me and I've alienated all my friends, family, and fucktoys.

BtS still fucking rules. I listened to it last night a couple of times before I went to bed. The fucked up thing is, if you check the reviews for it on Encyclopedia Metallum, it's like a whole bunch of people suddenly agree with what I had been saying all along. I remember the reviews for that piece used to be terrible; their worst rated album by far. Now it's one of the highest. I thought about writing my own review, but so many reviewers mirror my opinion that it would be dreadfully redundant.

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yeah dude. i was all about gorguts - obscura in the early 200s and nobody could care less. and now i just sold my cd of it for like 35 bucks and there are hundreds of bands in that style. i read an interesting article about composers and artists who baffle the audience. it usually comes out that they were about 10 years ahead of their time - so people end up liking it later on. now thats not the case for suffocation because that albums almost 20 years old and its in keeping with their style but hey. and did you hear anomalistic offerings? they re-recorded it as a japanese bonus track

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That's not what she said.

bunny wouldn't do that to a goat. She might do some altered art or knit it a sweater, but she wouldn't do that.

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Couple o´times yeah, J72826 on there

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doesnt ring a bell

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Breakcorethread mofucka

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Definitely. Loved it. So far they've nailed 2 of my three favorite songs off that album; Prelude to Repulsion and Marital Decimation. Here's hoping Ornaments of Decrepancy is next. I'm fairly certainly they'll end up re-recording the whole album as bonus tracks and b-sides eventually. They've already done half of it.

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oh who knows hahaha. did we argue about aphex twin or clark being better or something? i have a bad memory

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Aphex is better, but Clark's Totems Flare is really fucking amazing. Don't really like his previous releases much though.

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herr barr

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you had to have to made a "I quit" thread 4 years ago before people care about you coming back

did i do that? sometimes i think about deleting all the threads i made just to be a troll but then i remember you guys can probably revive them anyway

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no idea

lets find out

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