10. If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it TOO slowly.

9. Chocolate covered raisins, cherries, orange slices and strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as many as you want.

8. The problem: How to get 2 pounds of chocolate home from the store in a hot car. The solution: Eat it in the parking lot

7. A nice box of chocolates can provide your total daily intake of calories all at once. Isn't that handy?

6. If calories are an issue, store your chocolate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights, and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.

5. Eat equal amounts of dark chocolate and white chocolate for a balanced diet. They actually counteract each other.

4. Money talks. Chocolate sings.

3. Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger.

2. If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control top pants. (underwear for those not UK) An entire garment industry would be devastated.

and the #1 Rule of Chocolate...

1. Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your list of things to do today. That way, at least you'll get one thing done.

__________________

stop making so many goddamn threads

__________________

This thread is like "wtf? lol"

I don't see how it's necessary or anything in any way but if choclate keeps you happy and these things may actually come in useful someday.

__________________

am a woman, chocolate is one of the main food groups, and i know there are other women here

__________________

still wat the hell is the point of a thread about chocolate sure its tasty but it doesnt need a whole thread

__________________

Hey, if you guys can have your tits thread we should have our chocolate thread!!! Chocolate, especially the darkest chocolate, releases serotonin in the brain and makes us happy so you might see those tits.
So shut up!!
Maybe if you ate some chocolate you wouldn't whine so much. Moderate amounts are also good for your ticker.

Cool thread, bunny. I think your next tattoo should be #4. Or at least a t-shirt would be fun.

__________________

Yeah i was worried about what i'd find when i looked in the penis thread.

__________________

ta LB *snuggles* as for a tattoo, erm i don't think so! lol, have to go and make appointment with tattooist soon to get my right thigh finished off it really bugging me, and yes my other half stuffed me full of chocolate when i was last with him, including a double choc fudge cake, with choc butter icicing in the middle and choc icing on top and all around for my birthday cake...not including the huge 400g of cadbury's fruit and nut chocolate he got me too...hhhmmmmm a chocolate tattoo....may be onto someit there LB hhhhmmmmmmmmm chocolate

__________________

__________________

Ooo! A chocolate bunny! Maybe more mapley colored so it doesn't look like brown nothing, but that's an idea. The shading could be a little darker then.

__________________

lol rob, yeah my other half don't understand it, well he does, with the release of chemicals and that kinda stuff, he's seen the effect chocolate has on me, esp when i eat lots of it, which may explain why he stuffed with me lots of it when i was last with him....lol

__________________

ooooooh! i like that idea LB, you any good at drawing then? lol, fancy drawing me a chocolate bunny? PM me and i'll give you my e-mail addy

__________________

rofl You mean you're a bitch usually? I'm just kidding. You don't seem like that at all. That cake sounds wonderful. That chemical thing works for guys, too, so maybe he should try it as an experimental thing.


As long as he shares.

__________________

lol, i know you only messing and he laughed when i cut my birthday cake (the double choc fudge one), i cut one thin slice out of it and said "that bit is yours, the rest is mine" he just laughed and shook his head and said "i don't care", he not a chocolate person, the only sweet thing he really like is ice-cream, he got this chocolate brownie one, and a carmel one (ben & jerry's) i think...and the carmel one was to die for! much nicer than the chocolate brownie one, but in saying that he took me to an italian restuarant for my birthday and aftewards we had "The Godfather" for two, it's this massive desert, gots warm chocolate brownie pieces in the bottom, with chocoate sauce, vanilla ice-cream, chocolate ice-cream, toffee ice-cream, carmel sauce, those chocolate covered raisins on top, chocolate sprinkles, chocolate shavings, hhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmm *drools at thought* it is gorgeous!

__________________

i would be bitching about the asininity of these posts if it was just in the rtt. its far worse that this is a separate thread. this is a metal community, and chit chat forum or not, let's at least talk about something worthwhile or important

__________________

Just let em get on with it dude.

Women for ya..........

__________________

Okay, funny internet crap is important. As is tits. And those are both metal oriented, right? So is fitness and photos of non-band related stuff. If all that was posted was metal related stuff the forum wouldn't be off page one.
Don't be so darn sexist, Tranny. You're gonna be like the old man sitting in front of the tv complaining about what's on, but not doing something as simple as changing the channel!!
lol Maybe you need some choclate covered raisins in your gorp!

__________________

Oh come one, you don't have to read this

__________________

The biggest post-whore and pixel waster in the galaxy wants others to be more focused...

You're trying to strip Timedragon of his Biggest Hypocrite title, aren't you?

__________________

if i have off topic bullshit (which i usually do) i post it in the rtt, fbs. unlike bunny, i havent made a thread in a long time. and when i do ,its important and usually quite popular. not some lame, obviously copy-pasted from an email stupid bunch of completely off topic shit


edit


eg-


the fitness thread

upcoming metal releases the metaltabs college thread favorite non metal bands


the biggest "waste of pixel" ive ever made was my petition to ban MTV IS GAY a very long time ago. point proven

__________________

I know, I know, your threads are GREAT, He-Man. Now fuck off out of this one, will you?

__________________

whaha y is transient so agains this thread i love it, chocolate i mean, now i know what im getting once i have a gf again (if ever :P)

__________________

I dearly love the inspiration I get from metaltabbers. hehe

http://metaltabs.com/forum/showthread.php?t=27030

Oh yeah, I think I'll dedicate this to Tranny.

__________________

Wilbur Buds are delectable.

Leave controlling the number/relevance of new threads to the mods, tranny. We don't get money, but we do get the limited satisfaction of deciding what does and does not pass muster, so please let us have that, and while you're at it let these types of things go. Either they'll be closed or they won't; either way you'll have to deal with it. So deal.

By the way, that defense against Jim looks like a Dissection post. It's the same thing I was just calling him on in some other thread. Do you really want to come off like Dissection? No; not even he does.

hah

__________________

so you don't like me then? *shrug* yeah whatever you annoying little shit! if you don't like my threads, esp this one why you posting in here? just leave them to die their (un)natural death like most threads do...and who are you to say how many threads i can or cannot start? next you'll be telling me what i can and cannot post? WTF?? didn't know this was nazi germany! and if you don't like me (though can't see why, dunno what have done on you), keep the personal vendetta's off the boards, no-one likes to read them....

...bunny off now to make a wax doll of transient and stick pins in it

__________________

WOW bunny rules BUNNY FOR PRESIDENT!!

__________________

HAHAHA

Oh, and chocolate is good.

__________________

Someone HAD to say it.

::laughing while eating chocolate::

*blush*

and LB love your poem

__________________

I like this one better:

REASONS WHY GUITARS ARE BETTER THAN WOMEN

1. A guitar has a volume knob
2. If you break a guitar's G-string, it only costs $0.79 for a new one
3. You can make a guitar scream as loud as you want it to
4. You can unplug a guitar
5. You can finger a guitar for hours without it complaining it wants more
6. Other people can play your guitar without it getting upset
7. You can finger a guitar in public and get applause, not arrested
8. You can have a guitar any color you want and noone will care
9. If your guitar gets loose, you can just tighten up the strings
10. If your guitar doesn't make sounds you like, you can change pickups
11. You can use four fingers at a time on a guitar
12. If your guitar strings are too heavy, you can just get a lighter set
13. You can have a guitar professionally adjusted to your liking
14. If you scratch a guitar's back, it's unintentional, not required
15. You can go to a guitar shop and play all the guitars you want for free

__________________

but can you make love to a guitar? okay maybe you shouldn't answer that one!

__________________

Maybe if your dick's the size of Robbie Filth's..
OOH TEH BURNZORZ!!!1!1!!



sorry bout that. haha there's the oposite: why women are better then guitars (wich I'm not too fond of..) but I'll post anyway just for you

REASONS WHY WOMEN ARE BETTER THAN GUITARS

1. Women are more fun when the power goes out
2. You can't get your guitar wet
3. Ever try to screw a guitar?
4. The input to a guitar is only 1/4" (ouch!)
5. A guitar won't beg to be played
6. It's no fun to tie your guitar to a bed and spray whipped cream on it
7. When playing a guitar, you can use your teeth, but not your tongue
8. Guitars aren't very aggressive
9. A guitar won't play you back
10. You need two hands to make a guitar scream
11. A guitar won't scratch your back
12. A guitar won't drive you home if you're too drunk
13. A guitar doesn't care who plays it
14. You can't play two guitars at once
15. You can't fall in love with a guitar (awwwwwww, gee, how sweet ;-)
(well, maybe you can, but they can't love you back)

__________________

Making music is like making love..

__________________

haha exactly!

and I'm sure that some people out there get an erection while playing a Whitesnake tune on their guitar..

__________________

Meh, I don't really like chocolate, however the only choclate-y thing I can eat bucketloads of are Dime bars. Other than that, I'm a crisps guy. Maybe I should start a crisps thread?

i didnt say i dont like you. what i dont like is that because youre in with all the mods and alumni staff you get away with making thread upon thread of relatively pointless stuff like this. i have never once seen you discuss metal (do you even like it?)
no thanks to the wax doll also, i dont need any bad voodoo

also bia, if you want to go back to attacking each other fine. otherwise ill ignore your smartass post

oh and edit
for the record i like chocolate. not regular store bought kinds, but deluxe dark chocolate. like 50% or more cocoa is delicious

__________________

No... but I do think I'm "allowed" to laugh when I read something funny.
Anyway...I was quoting Bunny....
not making fun of you.

A little emotional eh?

too funny!! and i used to be a mod, and believe me i totally believe that if the current mods didn't want this thread open, it wouldn't be, regardless of who started it and yes i love metal , why would i be here if i didn't? no-one else disputes the my love for metal...and why should i defend my love of metal against a little jumped-up shit like you anyway? stop stirring things...*jabs a pin into the wax doll*

__________________

okay i agree with ya there! lol

__________________

Chocolate is the shit. I like chocolate chips. and Lindt or Lindor or whateverthefuckitscalled

__________________

oh yeah that chocolate is gorgeous!

__________________

Other people get away with as much, Tranny. I'd name names but I don't really want to bitch about it. Even more could if they'd try, but we've developed a fairly standardized form of netiquette that the members here take it upon themselves to enforce. This is actually more annoying, to the mods at least, than any number of new threads - I'm personally sick of seeing Dissection type in caps every time an old thread is dug up, or you telling people to post in the RTT, or the unimaginative flames regulars throw at offenders in imitation of FBS, or what have you and would rather see an end to that than to bunny's threads, which I don't feel particularly compelled to read. That bunny used to mod about half the site and was there and involved when the rules we enforce were actually codified, as opposed to a johnny-come-lately trying to enforce local custom because his personal investment in a web forum is so large that he finds new threads annoying, doesn't really help matters. Best thing to do in these cases is chill out and not click on the thread. Saves us all this trouble.

I don't eat chocolate. That guitar list seems to forget the penis. If fingering was all you got to do, who would have a girlfriend? Chaste Christian women trying to convert Mongolians aren't that self-sacrificing or ascetic.

I was wondering how long it would take before someone made that connection. (Bia's emotional...)

And yet another lady on the forum. This is it, mods and leaders. This is where you drop off the doesn't in favor of does not, and maybe put out little trailers on the internet to advertise the finer points of historic and civiv interest concerning MT.

Chocolate is sacred. Chocolate is great. If a piece is wasted, God gets quite irate.
Chocolate, proof of the existence of a divine and benign being.

__________________

this thread is currently lacking;



That is all. I think we've got all the staple ingredients in it now.

__________________

It was almost too easy, wasnt it?

Nice choc poem.
Cause it's true.

lindt truffles are great also. my favorite part about them is how they ALWAYS taste cold even if theyve been sitting at room temperature

and i secede to pst. letting this one go, especially because a tubby like myself cant get too worked up about a food thread

__________________

I'm such a dork...

I live alone and on christmas eve I dumped a bag of Hershey Kisses in my christmas stocking....

christmas day I wrecked the entire bag.

After reading this thread, I`ve come to the conclusions that guitars are sluts, Transient likes the wrong chocolate, and Robbie Filth has a tiny dick ( according to newhellonearth).

__________________

haha nice..

__________________

Who wants to finger a girl for hours?

Plus, who really says things like "Yep, I'm gonna go finger my guitar." People would look at you oddly. Nowadays it even sounds weird when you say "I'm gonna finger a B chord."

On that note, I'm gonna go finger my guitar.

who cares lindt chocolate is the shit but its expenseive

__________________

ALLLLLLL BYYYY MYYYY SELFFFFFFFFFF!
DON'T WANNA BE........ ALLLLL BYY MYSELFFFFFFFF!

Have you seen Bridget Jones' Diary? Don't worry, your Colin Firth is coming. (Except he probably has knock knees and the clap.)

I only eat very good, very strong chocolate. It's like wine - there is no reason to indulge in the shit stuff. It's too good at turning you into a fat bastard.

__________________

lol I NEVER thought you'd be singing Eric Carmen! He's an Ohio homeboy. That's a pretty song, but don't start singing "Go All the Way" or I'll cry.

The more pure dark cocoa in chocolate, the better it is for you. In moderation!
I should have some with my champagne now. I think I will.

I think a choclate guitar would be cool. Maybe a chocolate Tranny doll would be better. One could bite his legs off then or sit him on a hot stove and melt him? I dunno.

And thanks everyone for the posi's on my song. (bows)

__________________

Chocolate sucks

__________________

OH CONTROVERSIAL!!

I third or fourth the movement that Lindt rules, especially the truffles. and omg lindt bunnies at easter.

brb, Im going to go fret a girl

__________________

Haha

__________________

I'm going to go and get my guitar a new g string, the old one is rusted and has some gunk on it.

__________________

roflmao

__________________

why is high cocoa chocolate healthier

__________________

I thought this thread was going to be stupid, but ever since Trans started bitching it just kept getting better

Anyway, i like chocolate, i wont go out of my way to get it, but if its there, il take it. I also like its assorted products, hot chocolate, chocolate milk, chocolate cakes/pies etc... i once put chocolate bits in coffee, good shit

__________________

i like chocolate cake and chocolate ice cream too

__________________

jebas, i forgot ice cream!

__________________

how could you forget the ice cream!!!!

__________________

im not sure, maybe my mind is becoming defective due to the loss of chocolate intake i have encountered...


nah...

__________________

lol

eating to much chocolate turns you into a fat fucking fat fucker

__________________

quite true, thats why i solumnly buy it.

__________________

I like chocolate, but there are a lot of times i'm not realy that fond of it.

__________________

I'm Really more about the salty snacks.

__________________

I prefer fruity things

__________________

Comes with being fruity eh?

__________________

Hehe definately

__________________

Erm...ok..

Pork Scratchings

__________________

Moderation is the key.
I like this site and subscribe to it. There's a lot of health info there and that's one of the places I've read about chocolate's benefits.

http://www.realage.com/news_feature....aspx?id=526855

Chocolate is good in coffee. I put some of my homemade chocolate protein powder in my coffee sometimes especially if I'm walking or doing more working than usual. I don't use a whole lot of it though.
I've got a dynamite recipe that walpurgis talked me into making that incorporates shredded carrot into the chocolate cake recipe. I made cupcakes and he and I were the only ones that knew they were in there. You can't see them at all or taste them. With a few alterations I made them more heart healthy, too.

__________________

not a fan i take it?

__________________

Haha I love savoury snacks, but I just intentionally misinterpreted what he said.

You cant beat a packet of Pork Scratchings and a nice cold pint.

__________________

enlighten me, im canadian, what the hell are Pork Scratchings?

__________________

Are they like pork rinds? Those things are foul.

__________________

is it like bacon maybe? like a small strip or shaving off pork?

__________________

pork

__________________

Yea, seasoned pork rinds, lovely stuff

__________________

You must be jewish or islamic or vegan. Because pork kicks major ass.

__________________

Worst beer accompaniment ever. It's all about dry roasted peanuts.

Its your young taste buds that wouldn't know an exquisite snack if it hit you in the face I have to say that i don't often have anything with my beer (unless its a proper meal a'la: steak and ale pie), it taints the flavour

__________________

Beer only requires an accompaniment when it's of poor quality, like Stella or Budweiser.

Pfft, your taste buds have been corrupted by the vile snack that is the pork scratching.

My favorite snack/treat, and it's fuckin expensive, is that klondyke ice cream sammich that's vanilla ice cream with chocolate swirls in between two huge cookies.

__________________

oh ya its the shit

__________________

Yeah.. but it is a goddamn waste of money.

__________________

its worth it

__________________

Nope. Chocolate pudding when I was pregnant the first time. I think Denny was drinking Little Kings then. I'd only take a sip or 2 but it was good with chocolate pudding.

Beer and pork rinds are both pretty gross to me. JD, wine, pina colada, or a daiquiri for me.

__________________

Yeah their pretty nice too, but i much prefer pork scratchings (pork rinds)

__________________

I heard on the news in one short sentence how to describe the benefits of cocoa. It has antioxidants called flavinoids that relax the blood vessels and that causes more nitric oxide to be in the body. I think it was on WSEE, Erie, Pa. news this morning and this article seems very similar to what they said although I couldn't find it on the news website.

http://www.nutraingredients-usa.com...flavanols-heart

__________________