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View Poll Results: Who Would You Fuck if You Absolutely Had to?
Amadeus 1 0.00%
Chris Rezendes 2 0.00%
drawn&quartered 1 0.00%
Dyldo 4 0.00%
Gomli 2 0.00%
JoeYngVai 0 0%
johnmansley 0 0%
BassBehemoth 63705 49.99%
PST 88 1 0.00%
Requiem 1 0.00%
Paddy 63706 50.00%
Voters: 9. You may not vote on this poll

 
 
Old 2011-05-03, 13:17
Paddy
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MetalTabs Hottie Part II: Sausage Fest

Objectifying women is all good and well - seriously good and well, I loves me some objectifyin' - but let's turn the tables and see which one of you glans-faced tossers can tip the scales in this all new HOTTIE SHOWDOWN!

Multiple votes are permitted; there's enough love to go around.


Last edited by Paddy : 2011-05-06 at 02:38.
 
Old 2011-05-03, 13:24
Dyldo's Avatar
Dyldo
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I vote myself. Vote for me so I can fill the huge gapping chasm in my soul.
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i'm so bonery

Last edited by Dyldo : 2011-05-03 at 13:35.
 
Old 2011-05-03, 13:41
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX
dsnt trust ne1 < 30
 
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Where's the "None of the above?" And I didn't say nun I said none.
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-05-03, 13:51
Amadeus's Avatar
Amadeus
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Vote for me and I'll introduce you to one of the girls in the picture. And yeah, we have at least another ten in my section alone, so don't hesitate.
__________________
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
 
Old 2011-05-03, 14:53
Paddy
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I voted for the following:

Amadeus: I've always wanted to sodomise Varg Vikernes, but I'll settle for his much more attractive sister instead.

Chris Rezendes: I've always wanted a threesome with Mr. T and Ricky Martin, but I'll settle for...well, you get the idea.

drawn&quartered: I didn't realise how fucking pretty you are until I started searching for pics of you. Plus you were already in my good books

Dyldo: I voted for Dylan because I've often wondered what it'd be like to fuck an educationally subnormal gender non-specific with a clef palate and a penchant for dog cum.

Gomli: Just look at the fuckin' guy. Who wouldn't wanna be eaten alive by him?

PST 88: I think PST is quite attractive, in all seriousness. He would cook for you, he'd engage you in intellectual conversation, he looks like Sage Francis [allegedly] and being his bitch would ensure that you and your family would survive the Goyim Holocaust he and his ilk have been planning for centuries.

I didn't vote for JoeYngVai because I didn't really care for Mystic River and felt he was a bit hackneyed in it. John is a Merseyside faggot, and thus is excluded from my selection process by default. Requiem would just split me in two, and I want to live to fuck another day.

Last edited by Paddy : 2011-05-05 at 11:30.
 
Old 2011-05-03, 15:34
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
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This blackmail and heresy. Those pics where from when I was 17? I demand...I dont know. Either way I will vote for dyldo so I can fill his huge gaping hole.
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NEGROGENESIS



Last edited by drawn&quartered : 2011-05-03 at 15:43.
 
Old 2011-05-03, 22:06
Wolfsherz
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So this Georgian Olympian runs into a bar

Aosoth - New album III out now on Agonia Recs
Epoch - bass, guitars, drums, MetaStasizing out asap
Asphixa - bass, demo out asap
Adustum - bass, guitars, full length out soon on XXXXXXXXXX recs

Quote:
Originally Posted by far_beyond_sane
Tetianblood? ... Well, 'Necrosemen' to you too. Twat.
 
Old 2011-05-04, 02:05
Paddy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by drawn&quartered
This blackmail and heresy. Those pics where from when I was 17? I demand...I dont know. Either way I will vote for dyldo so I can fill his huge gaping hole.
If you upload a recent pic of your perty face I'll replace the one in the poll Or I could just remove you if you're not happy with it, Wolf will gladly take your place, the vain little fucker that he is!
 
Old 2011-05-04, 08:39
Requiem
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Obviously myself.

Everyone else is either too fat or too fucking skinny. Plus, Christian Bale is hot.
 
Old 2011-05-04, 08:49
blitz906's Avatar
blitz906
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GOMLI!

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
 
Old 2011-05-04, 09:10
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
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WHERE THE FUCK IS BB IN THE POLL ABOVE?!?!?!?!?!

MANOWAR

Edit: Ah fuck that I'd do Dylan at any time
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe

Last edited by Gomli : 2011-05-04 at 09:12.
 
Old 2011-05-04, 09:37
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johnmansley
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Rezendes looks like what I imagine Katie Price's son, Harvey, would grow up to look like.
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Red Sparowes - At the Soundless Dawn
 
Old 2011-05-04, 09:43
Paddy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by johnmansley
Rezendes looks like what I imagine Katie Price's son, Harvey, would grow up to look like.
 
Old 2011-05-04, 11:22
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
If you upload a recent pic of your perty face I'll replace the one in the poll Or I could just remove you if you're not happy with it, Wolf will gladly take your place, the vain little fucker that he is!

nah just keep it. I like to look at that picture of myself and pretend I am a girl. I squint my eyes at the screen and it helps make it happen, then I start masturbating.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Requiem
Obviously myself.

Everyone else is either too fat or too fucking skinny. Plus, Christian Bale is hot.


Christian Bale is also 6 feet tall so I don't see what that has to do with anything.
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I dont have any funny quotes

NEGROGENESIS


 
Old 2011-05-04, 12:28
Dyldo's Avatar
Dyldo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
WHERE THE FUCK IS BB IN THE POLL ABOVE?!?!?!?!?!

MANOWAR

Edit: Ah fuck that I'd do Dylan at any time

Adda boy!

Technically, the poll means nothing since I won in last years Tabby awards.
__________________
Check my band out:
facebook.com/deadheadroses
deadheadroses.bandcamp.com
deadheadrosesmusic.com
i'm so bonery
 
Old 2011-05-05, 09:20
Paddy
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Well shucks, would you look at that! I'm in the lead!!!!!
 
Old 2011-05-05, 10:57
Chris Rezendes's Avatar
Chris Rezendes
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I had to vote for myself as I'm clearly the sexiest member on the poll (that awful picture notwithstanding), but I really have to protest the utter lack of BassBehemoth on the poll. I mean, I would fuck myself... technically I do three or four (or 12) times a week. If I could clone myself, I'd hit that to.

But if I were trapped in a room with my clone and BassBehemoth both trapped in a stockade with their pants down and only enough lube to violently rape one of them, I'd rocket my jizz bomb deep into BBs intestines every single time.
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Trust in god, he'll give you shoes!
 
Old 2011-05-05, 11:29
Paddy
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OH ALRIGHT THEN! Steve has been replaced by BB. Steve is never here anyway, he thus relinquishes his right to be the object of our collective homosexual confusions.
 
Old 2011-05-05, 22:47
Chris Rezendes's Avatar
Chris Rezendes
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I object to the fact that the picture you posted makes it look as though I am about to rape the person looking at it. The whole idea is that the poster should be intending to take me prison style, not the other way around.

So here are some more relaxed shots 4 u gais. If you are anything like the guys at MCI Cedar Junction, you'll love these.

http://img219.imageshack.us/img219/5233/073nw.jpg
http://img192.imageshack.us/img192/8479/091zn.jpg
http://img841.imageshack.us/img841/2120/100xw.jpg

NSFW! Too hawt for int3rw3bz!
http://img218.imageshack.us/img218/5043/139fx.jpg

I love that last one. It's simultaneously the best and worst shot anyone has ever taken of me.
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Trust in god, he'll give you shoes!
 
Old 2011-05-06, 02:47
Paddy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Rezendes
I love that last one. It's simultaneously the best and worst shot anyone has ever taken of me.
Wow, wow, WOW! Now just what the fuck is going on here? You're mixed race, true, but usually that doesn't manifest itself with a brown man's extremities and a white man's torso.

You're a hot fucker, regardless of your Legoland construction. In the second pic with the little girl you look positively sexy, and not just because you're next to a little girl.

Me. In. Feel. You. Wanna. I.

There, it can't be gay if it's not grammatically correct!

By the way, I have a small comment about the third pic. I know you're in college n'all, but even a high school kid failing physics could tell you that you cannot lift yourself off the ground.

"LOOK! I'm doing it, I'm doing it!"

NO Chris. NO.
 
Old 2011-05-06, 04:16
Amadeus's Avatar
Amadeus
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Posts: 2,149
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy

By the way, I have a small comment about the third pic. I know you're in college n'all, but even a high school kid failing physics could tell you that you cannot lift yourself off the ground.

"LOOK! I'm doing it, I'm doing it!"

NO Chris. NO.



Actually, using superconducting trousers and a somewhat inventive floor design...
__________________
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
 
Old 2011-05-06, 06:32
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX
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Aw, Chris, you're a cutie. Okay, I like the shower curtain in the last one and it would actually go with my multicolored daisy curtains in my bathroom. Those are cool pictures though.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-05-06, 07:34
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
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That grin....that muthafuckin heartmeltin grin...I'd so do him
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C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2011-05-06, 07:46
blitz906's Avatar
blitz906
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Rezendes

Anybody else notice the person that looks like a running ghost?

And is that a feather on your shoe?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
 
Old 2011-05-06, 10:17
Paddy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blitz906
And is that a feather on your shoe?
He's a government-designated bird stomper. All of birds' natural predators are in cages in Chris' basement, so he takes over their role as controller of the bird population. This photograph was taken during a "100 Birds in One Day" celebration.
 
Old 2011-05-06, 10:31
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX
dsnt trust ne1 < 30
 
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Ghosts like to get their groove on, too.
He feeds them to his snakes. duh
Are those Dockers you're wearing, Chris? They look like my eldest's old work pants.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-05-06, 10:50
Chris Rezendes's Avatar
Chris Rezendes
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
By the way, I have a small comment about the third pic. I know you're in college n'all, but even a high school kid failing physics could tell you that you cannot lift yourself off the ground.

"LOOK! I'm doing it, I'm doing it!"

NO Chris. NO.


No, but I did do it. I also tried to teach others how, but I'm guessing either a. they weren't strong enough or, b. I have the force. I'm still testing stuff out to figure out which.
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Trust in god, he'll give you shoes!
 
Old 2011-05-06, 11:08
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blitz906
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
He's a government-designated bird stomper. All of birds' natural predators are in cages in Chris' basement, so he takes over their role as controller of the bird population. This photograph was taken during a "100 Birds in One Day" celebration.

This made me audibly laugh.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
 
Old 2011-05-06, 15:19
BassBehemoth's Avatar
BassBehemoth
Die Young.
 
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You guys are all teh gheyz.
__________________
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Quote:
Originally Posted by moe_blunts
you done told me lots of thangs bout beer n shit and canada. have a grand ol cunt of a good time.


RIP moe.
 
Old 2011-05-06, 15:31
Paddy
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It's not gay if you beat them up afterwards, and I could fuckin' destroy you son. Your knuckles would look like road-kill by the time I'm done with ya.

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