Yes, there were only 263 posts in the previous RTT. Personally, I blame the economy. That, and my ill-advised mod powers.

P.S. PST is a fart-breather.

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wtf? Why would you close the RTT before 300?
I hate you. I FUCKIN HATE YOU

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Paddy thinks he's the Spanish Inquisition.

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VULGAR DISPLAY OF POWER!

I'm so happy dance excited! My grandson will be here today and I can hardly wait! We haven't met him yet so it's a long time coming, but he's as excited as we are.

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man, fucking budget cuts.

Let me guess, so now you're gonna try to stop this RTT at 262? You can't hide this trickery from me; I am all but familiar with the "Shrinking Candy Bar" method: first you sell a big candy bar for $1, then you increase the price a little, and then you decrease the size a little, and then you increase the price a little, and then you decrease the size a little, etc.

Eventually RTT's will consist of a 10 part conversation before being closed down, and moderators will incorporate a PayPal function to extend the length of threads based on the donations from our members! I SEE THROUGH YOUR TRICKS! FOOL ME ONCE, SHAME ON, SHAME ON YOU. FOOL ME TWICE, YOU FOOL ME CAN'T GET FOOLED AGAIN.

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And you had to open your yap (or fingers) and give them ideas. Bad Joe'.

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DON'T DO IT LITTLE MAN! RUN! RUN WHILE YOU STILL HAVE HAMSTRINGS!

You're almost there, Joesephino. What is actually happening is a concerted effort to elicit complaints from the regular members, at which point the last mod to post prior to the complaint is permitted to have a wank whilst looking at secret nude photos of Bobbi and DameFraMorkum engaged in what I can only describe as "sin". It's the MT Wanking Game™! And guess what? I WIN THIS ROUND!! Now, where did I put my Captain Planet-themed dildo set...

I'd just like to declare that Dyldo's last contribution in the last RTT still haunts my day dreams.

My nightmares, damnit, my nightmares!


M'kay, I've been playing guitar for four years or so and same goes for a pal of mine, keyboard player. Today we did our very first recording, using untested equipment and a minimum of preparation. Seriously, we only meet during the summers and a few weeks over christmas. Any old how, I threw these up for the benefit of a new drummer companion and thought, what the heck. You guys can use something to bash.
Probably "Would you" and "Water" are the only songs somewhat appropriate for this forum, but for this release I'm dedicating "Love is not alone" to Paddy.
http://www.myspace.com/atmospherevikings

Oh, and I forgot a cable at home, hence it's somewhat irritating to listen to in headphones. Project for next time.

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Not only that, but his last contribution rendered my first post in this RTT erroneous. What an absolute cunt he is. Die of cancer, Dyldo. Massive helpings of foaming, steaming cancer. Oh, and AIDS and syphilis. Of the face and balls.

Ahh I can't stay mad at...no wait, yes I can. DIE. DIE DIE DIE.

Neeeeeeooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrmmmmmmmmm KABLAMO! Know what that was? Your plane crashing into a mountain after I blind the pilot with a laser pointer.

I listened to "Love is Not Alone". I love you Patrik. Your vocals make my penis tingle. I shall offer some sweet critiques of the rest in due course. (Note to self: "Jew Course", a weekly reality show in which Jewish contestants must overcome an obstacle course in order to win nuggets of Jew-gold.)

I love haunting dreams. You may be the oldest I've infiltrated yet, Amadeus. I'll listen to your songs when I'm home and get a chance. Interested to hear. And my future wife died of cancer, AIDS, and syphill, Paddy, you fucking asshole!

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No shit, it'll be me who gives them to her!

I wanna go see Decrepit Birth and Cephalic Carnage in 2 days (Friday).

Only problem is they're playing with a bunch of fuckin' gay bands like "All Shall Perish" and "Animals as Leaders".

I'm probably going to that same show also, summer slaughter. oh god

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Can you get me Dystopia's autograph?

piss

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yea, Ill just look for the dude with the mullet

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agreed

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You can close any thread at any time so long as the replacement thread mentions my name. This is a genuine forum rule.

And then please beat the shit out of him and cut his hair

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Damnit I just tried to find the "Like" button after reading that... I've participated in too much facebook.

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How deep-seated is this desire to press the "Like" button outside of Facebook? If your girlfriend gives you good head do you start jabbing the top of her skull with your finger? Man, that'd be fuckin' awesome.

Especially if it worked! And then your friends can comment on it.

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Hahaha, even though I don't have a FB, I'm going to try that the next time I get head.

Me: Aaaaahhh shit. *immediately after release repeatedly pokes random spots of her skull*
Her: Uh, what are you doing?
Me: Trying to find the "Like" button.

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please let me know what her reaction is... i feel like I'd pussy out at the last second.

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I'm definitely going to try it. What's there to be afraid of? Its not like she can un-give the head she just gave you. That's the great thing about foreplay, there's no Indian givers! Sorry, sorry, Native American Givers.

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Is it true that Native Americans were called Indians because Columbus thought he had reached India? I heard that in a movie (Quiz Show, not a bad flick) and I instantly believed it because it's illegal to state a falsehood in a movie. I heard that in a movie, too.

From what I learned it is true. but that whole thing about it being illegal to state something false in a movie is probably total bullshit.

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Hmmm, I don't remember hearing that in a movie so I'm afraid I'll have to respectfully disagree.

This is how internet debates get started

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No it isn't.

YOUR MOVE, BITCH!

well, your whole argument is wrong because your initial appeal to authority quoting movies can only state correct facts is a fallacy. so that means whatever you say next and from here on is wrong.

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Well I read on the internet that if it was in a movie, it is true. I also read that here on the green screen.

OK, this ends right here kids:
Yes Pads, it's true about the Indians. No, it's not true about not being allowed to tell lies in a movie. Now will you please go back to talking music, beer, chicks and midgets!

Why? 'Cause I said so.

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I do, and I've never even had a facebook account.

Seriously. I know absolutely nothing about facebook, including what a 'like' button is. But I think I may have gleaned the intent through the application of my immense intellect.

The only movies that are allowed to lie are documentaries. All others must present peer-reviewed evidence in order to lay claim to any and all 'facts.' 'Indians' were named such due to their immense love of the music of india.arie, just as fans of the Grateful Dead are known as 'Deadheadians.'

That is the truth.

You, my friend, are a documentary.

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I'll give you All Shall Perish, even though I personally dig their old stuff..I'm in a psuedo-"core" band anyways


BUT animals as leaders is farther from gay than Burt Reynolds attending the Westboro Baptist Church.

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"

Did you know that books are only allowed to state falsehoods inside quotation marks? For instance:

This is all true this is all true "oh, but what's this? A big fuckin' LIE! Elephant cocks are often used as a substitute for pipe insulation in areas of the desert which have water features". Truth, more truth, and nothing but the truth until "BAM! Kevin Costner actually lives in Waterworld, an abandoned water park just outside of L.A." I'm being so truthful right now, I'm so honestly being truthful. "Paddy is fat and repulsive". This section of this sweet paragraph is just some truth for you to gnaw on. "PST definitely doesn't cum in the clam chowder at his restaurant". Man, can somebody give me a hand with all of this truth? "Patrik Mörée is an anagram of I Want tö Feel Paddy Inside Mé."

Everything I just said is true, because this entire post is contained within quotation marks. Can't argue with science, cunts!

"

Actually, all books are documentaries.
* the above statement was meant to be enclosed in quotation marks.

Paddy this is for you: PADDY COFFEE.

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And all movies are books, which proves that I've been right all along.

In the same way that Brazil nuts are simply called "nuts" in Brazil, and how French toast in France is just "toast", Irish coffee in Ireland is simply known as "breakfast".

I've never actually tried Irish coffee, I'll probably give it a whirl next time someone in my family buys some whiskey. Oh...

Bored? Me too:

http://www.pmcmullanjr.entadsl.com/cross.html

well...fuck you. I'm leaving this forum. and I'm still right

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Agreed. Animals as Leaders were pretty fucking good when I saw them. He's probably judging of the name or just using his incredible taste in music to judge them.

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I only had penis right. That`s a bit disturbing
Good work on that though

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Okay the only 2 ones I could NOT find were

PST's name was listed along with 40 others on a scrap of paper found in this man's pocket

Hall of Fame for MetalTabs members

Darnit

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Haha that is pretty unsettling.

Mmm, the PST one is probably a little too lateral. I can't believe you got as many as you did though, nice work!

If you click the "Solve" button it will reveal the answers, if you can't be arsed working on them anymore.

So? I'd still go so Cannibal Corpse even if Sum 41 and Blink 182 were opening up for them. I'd even go as far as Creed and Nickelback to see Morbid Angel.

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Perseids meteor shower tonight.

From last year, same thing though just a different day: http://blogs.discovermagazine.com/b...s-sunday-night/

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I wouldn't mind posting once in a while, but i just have nothing to say lately.

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For $4.99 a six pack that steel reserve shit ain't all bad. I think my Red Dog streak is coming to an end.

Sup Wayloon

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Steve my man! I've missed you!!1! I've spent the last several weeks changing Dyldo's avatar to yours so I could wank to his posts, but the fucker keeps changing it back.

I'd say for $1.99 and if I was shit-drunk and wanted to black out it wouldn't be all that bad. Fucking rotgut. However, it does get you drunk fast so, it does work.

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yooo killer!

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New Lil Jon goes FUCKING hard.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Y1WLlb44rY

I think MetalTabs is about to suffer some more downtime. Anyone else noticed how sluggish it's been over the past couple of days? I'd best print off all of Dystopia's posts now while I still have access to them.

I`m now going to lock myself with a stereo and the new Maiden album and then listen to the album until I dehydrate

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Dude, just reboot your Dell and get it over with.

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No one thought it was disturbing that he's a junior? That was a pretty amusing thing, Paddy.

We went out to see the meteor shower with grandson, but it was around 10 pm and it was actually still kind of light to the northeast where they said it was supposed to be visible. We'll try tonight when we get home from Uncle Bob's. I'm having so much fun being grandma! I even got to yell at him for swearing yesterday. I think that turned out well.

Cool tunes, Amadeus!

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I missed half of Testament's set, but what I heard was great.

Megadeth played the entire Rust in Peace album, then Trust, Headcrusher, A Tout Le Monde, Symphony of Destruction, and Peace Sells.

Slayer played two newer songs that I didn't know, then the entire Seasons album, South of Heaven, Raining Blood, and Angel of Death.

Fun show overall. I figured Megadeth would be headlining, though. Slayer had a tough act to follow.

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I'm going to be gone for the next several months whilst I indulge in my new favourite pastime:

http://baiting.org/

Just to be sure, can I get arrested when I click on this link you posted?

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Dude, they played the entire Rust in Peace album? Fuck.

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I hate bibles. Not THE bible, I'm talking about the teeming quantities of man-made mass-produced bibles that people think are so sacred and so special. Nuh-uh. Nothing sacred is so easily accessible or freely given. If I were a man of God, I would believe in the TRUE bible, the one first written and not tampered with. Where is it?

Well, if everything we've seen in Lord of the Ring-esque movies and from what Amon Amarth sings about, not to mention every power metal band in existence , the true bible somewhere out there possibly guarded by a large Minocorn (Half unicorn, half Minotaur), with a flaming sword of vengeance, spitting hot lava and a large horn that shoots lightning. The one who defeats it will earn the right to read the word of God, not to mention that upon death, the Minocorn will transform into a 7 foot fully stack naked blonde chick and guess what? You fuck her and make babies with your holy seed. and these babies will be able to fend off against the Anti-Christ and the Four Horseman in a big giant anime-style battle. I'm talking about a power level of OVER 9,000!!!

That's the bible I believe in and not a bad idea for a movie. I impress myself often.

Oh, and the Minocorn is black and sounds like Samuel L. Jackson. But don't worry, once you slay it and it transforms, the chick will be white and blonde (the best kind of white), she'll have the voice of Lady Gaga.

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Haha it's just text

Doug Stanhope contributes to it sometimes. Here's one of his I've just been reading, and I've got tears in my eyes from laughing so fucking hard:

http://baiting.org/Logs/I+Like+Little+Girls!/995243024/

Fuck yeah man, this show was here July 26. I was front row! Megadeth pwned all, and before the show they were my least favorite band out of the three.

This guy was right behind me! haha, My head/metal horns are in most of his shots.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3LAEtKq-ohw

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Oh. My. God. I haven't laughed like that in awhile.

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I swear to god I almost cried when they started playing Holy Wars. I'm sure I'm not telling you anything new if you've seen them before, but they were unbelievably tight. I honestly had no idea songs could sound that great and true to form live. I don't know if I mentioned this is the first real show I've ever gone to see.



We were in the seated section, but basically on the floor. Our seats were unbelievably close; lots of people snuck past security onto the floor. Neither I nor the friend I went with were particularly into moshing, so the seats were fucking PERFECT.

FWIW, Megadeth were and are my favorite of the three bands, but I'm being as unbiased as I can when I say they were the best live of the three. I'm not sure anyone could top that, though I hear Morbid Angel and Cannibal Corpse (two of my other top 5 bands) both put on frantically energetic and musically tight shows. Hopefully I'll get to find out someday. I also hope to see Megadeth again; they didn't play one of their live staples, Wake Up Dead. I've been obsessed with this song since I was 13; I regularly repeat the track two or three times before letting the rest of Peace Sells play.

That being said, I'd also love to see Slayer again (they were fun as hell if nothing else) and to hear Testament's full setlist next time. Very underrated band, Testament. I consider Souls of Black a classic, must-have thrash album. The rest of their early stuff is good and some of their newer stuff is, too.

What did you think of Testament live, by the way?

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Words can`t describe how funny that is

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OK. I just read about a proposal from our main opponents in the election. Here's the deal. The current government implemented a generous tax break for house keeping services; if you hire someone to clean your house, for baby sitting, cook and so on you get to deduct half the cost from your total tax. The service sector has gone through a monumental boom, even as the financial crisis swept over our shores. Our opponents have said all along that when they get power they'll scrap this reform. Today they suggested butlers at the subway stations. Seriously. They want, financed by the government, friggin butlers at the subway stations, where you can hand in your children and dirty laundry for proper handling by the State.

Yesterday, I saw a squirrel that had drowned in a bath tub we use for the horses' drinking water. I'm not sure how I feel about this. Either.
What the fuck's going on?

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Testament were flawless live. Chuck Billy's voice sounds like it's right out of the recordings. The only problem was the double bass was way too fucking loud and it drowned out a lot of guitars.

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Haha yeah I know what you`re talking about. Almost the same here. At almost any bus station there are dudes that want to carry your things for you or keep an eye on your children while you get a ticket or help old grannys get out of the bus and I never ever saw someone accept their help. So basically they`re standing around and smoke (literally) the tax money that is spend for their entire fuckin existence.

Drowning is the most common death reason for animals in Sweden amirite?

Edit: Ah yeah and I have to fulfill several hours of social work now

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I have to agree that most people dont give Megadeth due respect. I feel that you have to see a band live at least once before one can be a solid judge of their music. Cannibal Corpse are pure comics during moments in their show if you have seen any of the Youtube funnies involving their music. They are also a golden live band. I love Slayer live too but the last few years seem like they just don't care about giving as good a show. In the earily 2000's they could give a show that nearly left you needing an aberlamps

The best live metal show I have even seen though was Pantara. Ever time I seen them it just got better until Phil started to waste out. We all know the history after.

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Hahaha, oh god. I was just going through some old threads and I had totally forgotten about the e-gangs some of you losers started.

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Old threads are amusing. I go through a few now and then and all you guys have grown up so much!! - not.

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Why haven`t I heard about that earlier?
Fuck I`m always too late

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You and me both, Shaky. What's an e-gang?

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Guitarists against drummers. The only time they weren't at each other was when a keyboardist (or I) got thrown in the mix.

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Some of the members formed "gangs" and their tag, or whatever, would be in their sig if I remember correctly. This was like, 3-4 years ago.

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So... the point? Drowned squirrel?

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CC are very high on my list of "must see live before I die" bands. Top 5, without a doubt.

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La Losita Order, fo ever yo, dey bet know It was this prank BLS and I put together years ago. We did drive by PMs and high jacked old threads as our hideouts. Members had to have the LLO e-tattoo in their sig. Other people started e-gangs and eventually e-gang fights broke out. Shit talk everywhere in certain old threads. It was all for fun until one day the MTPD came into one of the threads we were having an e-gang fight in and found out what was really going on. Lmao, so many of us got suspended, came back, kept it going, and got susended again.

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They are doing a tour along with Devourment, Vital Remains and another band in the US. Check the tours thread I`ve posted the dates there


Sometimes I`d give my left nut to see the facial expression of a person of the F.B.I. (favourized would be a woman) when she reads what kind of things are talked about here. There must be at least 4 members getting arrested or I want to have my nut back

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Well, chances are you've already partially had your wish. FRA (Försvarets radioanstalt, maybe The Defence Communications Bureau) of Sweden already monitors all internet traffic coming from servers outside our borders. And since I'm in the bad habit of every now and then inserting words like Allah, Terrorist and the like (in Swedish, of course) it's very possible I've already acquired a dossier of my own, in which some MT might be involved. I have a couple of friends who know for a fact that they are registered, some day I'll ask them to snoop around on my behalf. Just a few more random throw-ins concerning the cataclysmic demise of two thousand fans at a Roxette concert. Can't promise any facial expression from a Bureau member though.

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whats up cunts

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Clits and giggles.

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Some of you might enjoy this:

http://www.pranktxt.com/send

On this website you can send a text message from one persons cell to another person, making them think that they were actually texted by that person lol.

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Blitzmeister!!!!1

I'm always a little weary of punching cell phone numbers into dodgy websites. There are so many text scams these days, like getting texts which cost you £5 just to open them, that it doesn't seem worth the risk. It also puts me in mind of those MSN block checker sites which are the perfect vehicle for harvesting legitimate email addresses for spam purposes. It's not likely you'd bother entering a fake address into the block checker (why would you?) so chances are it's legit and usable, and the same goes for phone numbers. I'm not just being paranoid, my dad does this shit all the time hahaha.

Speaking of which, I remember getting a call from some extremely dodgy cunt who said we had won the Microsoft lottery. Wondering how this asshole got our number, and after a few seconds of inquiring, I realised that my dad had replied to one of those phishing emails with our home phone number. I can't even begin to describe how pissed I was, I wanted to punch the idiot in the face, and for so many different reasons. The cunt who called me was cruisin' for a bruisin' as well, he just wouldn't fuck off. I had to basically threaten him to stop him calling back every 10 seconds. God damn sociopaths. Exposing people over 40 to the internet is like sending a 13-year-old into Thailand with an erection; you're asking for trouble.

EDIT: Oh yeah, I don't know if you saw this post in the TV thread blitz:

http://metaltabs.com/forum/showpost...4&postcount=105

Just in case you thought I was being a cunt

Every now and again I get a text or call from some bullshit place telling me I'm awesome. Just yesterday I got one from some horrible bar I've never been to a few cities away telling me I've won everything. I knew she was lying because I already own everything.

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MY HEAD HURTS MY HEAD MURTS MH YURTS RYTHS KILL ME

Share Thud My
Share Mud Thy
Hares Thud My
Hares Mud Thy
Shear Thud My
Shear Mud Thy
Sear Duh Myth
Eras Duh Myth
Ares Duh Myth
Sera Duh Myth
Harm Duet Shy
Harm Dye Tush
Harm Dye Thus
Math Duh Ryes
Math Drys Hue
Math Dry Hues

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Well look what the Cat dragged in..



How's it going brotha?

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pretty good just working and living life i suppose. drinking an arrogant bastard ale right now. whats new in canuck land

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Yeah, how is it over there? HOW MANY BABY SEALS DID YOU KILL TODAY, YOU ASSHOLE?!

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Clearly Paddy is Cleverbot:

User: All women are whores.

Cleverbot: Are you a guy then?

User: Obviously.

Cleverbot: How old are you?

User: 30873087383.001.

Cleverbot: What?

User: That's my age.

Cleverbot: So 8 years then?

User: Yeah...

Cleverbot: Wanna come over?

User: You want an 8 year old to come over?

Cleverbot: Yes.

User: And do what?

Cleverbot: Have feelings.

User: Are you going to touch me?

Cleverbot: Would you like me to?

User: Hi, I'm Chris Handson. Why don't you have a seat right over there?

Cleverbot: Because I'm already in this seat right over here.

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Rocky Horror Picture Show yesterday in an open air theatre! It was amazing. I love that tranny movie

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I didn't really like that movie for some reason, except that one chick's tits I think were in it so that was kind of nice

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So to say it`s not even a regular movie. It`s just more a musical. And it`s kind of a ritual to dress as one of the characters and for example throw rice in the audience when they two main characters get married. It`s fun believe it or not. Fags

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Hahaha I wish, that guy's a fucking genius:

User: Holy fuck, do you smell that?
Cleverbot: Smell what?
User: That.
Cleverbot: What is that?
User: The smell.
Cleverbot: What smell.
User: That smell.
Cleverbot: Obviously not if I'm asking about the smell.
User: Obviously not what?
Cleverbot: Yeah. Or are you?
User: I think you just blew my mind, now blow my son.
Cleverbot: Why?
User: It makes his cock all tingly, plus having Downs Syndrome means he can't get head the normal way.
Cleverbot: I'm already insane. I'm sure you made no difference.
User: Why are you called 'Cleverbot' when you're clearly an imbecile with no real grasp of language? I've had more convincing conversations with a Serbian exchange student.
Cleverbot: Who's a girl?
User: Ahhh now you're just being a cunt.
Cleverbot: I know how to say 'Where is she?' in spanish.
User: Go on then.
Cleverbot: Amaral -sin ti no soy nada.
User: WRONG! WRONGY McWRONG!
Cleverbot: I know who I am. It's you who doesn't know who you are.
User: That was almost philosophical. No wait, not philosophical...what's the word? Oh yeah, DURRRRRRRRRRR DUR DUR DUR!
Cleverbot: Can you tell me something in Basque?
User: If you pay the train fare.
Cleverbot: Sure.
User: I want the cash to be entirely made up of pennies, delivered by a naked midget with a wooden leg.
Cleverbot: I don't either. Maybe we should find someone with a wooden leg.
User: Yeah, a midget. Keep up ya dizzy cunt ya.
Cleverbot: You keep up with the times. They are recreating it in 3d. It has never been in 3d before.
User: Midgets have always been 3D.

What a cunt.

If there is one movie I can't stand..it is that one. HOLY GAY.

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