About the size of one of those small Pringles cans

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PST is getting way too much coverage these days. It's not good for him, just look at what happened to Princess Diana! Although knowing PST - and I DON'T - his Zionist banker uncle was probably behind the hit, so I doubt he has anything to worry about.

http://www.facebook.com/#!/video/vi...85152571&ref=mf

I am not the recorder for this by the way, just an accomplice and I think this vid is entertaining enough to post here.

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Put it on youtube for all of us (me) that don't have a facebook.

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I hope all the RTT's from now on involve me being called principle parts of the male anatomy.

In fact I demand it! New Forum Rule!

I used to get more coverage, you know. In fact, I used to be kind of cool, once. Those were the days.

Here's a question; is it to be assumed, on account of your Jewdom, that you are a circumcised dickhead and/or shaft? I mean, if we are going to picture this (and Icertainly am), we ought to get it right.

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Head: no.

Shaft: yes.

Picture away.

I just saw a myspace message from our Resident Tom Araya:

"HEY! Someone at MT tell a mod that YOUR_GOD_IS_DEAD cant log in!!! I changed my email and now i cant post! HALP!!!!!"

It was from mid June so I still don't know if this is the case, but I'd thought I'd pass it along.

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According to the mod control panel MT is awaiting his user email confirmation. That is, he has to click the link in his confirmation email to regain access. I don't think the mods can change this for him directly, nomad probably can though. Tell him to check both email accounts and to check the junk folders etc. Failing that, there should be a "resend activation email" option somewhere when he tries to login unsuccessfully. Failing even more that, he should fire off an email to nomers. Here's his MetalTabs address: alexk@metaltabs.com

YGID hasn't been here since the 25th of June, so it seems that he's still experiencing the problem.

Ok cool. I'll let him know. Thanks.

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Yay! I'm useful!

Like your mom
We made a trip to an amusement parc and HOLY CRAP how boring was that? Rollercoaster actually gave me orgasms back in time but now oh my god I`ve wasted 7 fucking hours of my life

Edit: Day saved: Found my Melechesh shirt!!!! God how much I´ve missed it

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No, like YOUR mom. It's YOUR mom who's useful. See what you made me do? You made me open up a can of whoopass on your...ass.

When you've eaten a man and kept the leftovers in your fridge for 6 months there's probably little else in this world that'll excite you.

Meh, there's always babies.

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I don't know. The leftover babies in my fridge loose their excitement with their freshness.

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Unless the baby's parents are watching it's little more than a glorified chicken slaughter; the fucker won't know what's going on and will therefore be unable to provide background pleading to compliment your pre-meal wank. Besides, making babies cry is like shooting fish in the face with a shotgun in a barrel, there's just no sport in it! Tasty, though.

There's a REASON we... I mean all horror movie villains go after vacationing college students.

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Boooyah dead babies are always good for a laugh.
I think I will wait until page 2 to start the serious shit in here, page 1 is always reserved for bullshit so yeah:

Ponys, anybody?

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http://www.deadbabies.com/

A disappointingly sparse website.

Okaaaaaaaay this is sick

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This... IS... METALTABS

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You lost all coolness when you broke the shackles of your avatar. Prior to that, you were the internet personifaction of David Cross. You might as well have actually been David Cross. Now? A massless, formless void. Davoid Cross, if you will.

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Truthier truth has never been truthed. Lest, not on the interwebs.

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i started to read that chris and thought you were insulting me for some reason haha

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The phrase "it's always the one you least suspect" had me pretty confused last night when I was trying to have dreams about Chris and Truth double-teaming me. Even if we assume the phrase to be true and valid, it doesn't really help matters, because the one you least suspect then becomes the one you most suspect by virtue of his being the least suspected. And if that happens then he's clearly not the man you're looking for, because you now suspect him, and some other guy in your list of suspects becomes the least suspected by default to which your attentions would then be drawn. It's like an unending circle of paradoxical brain-fuckage. I wonder if that's why real detectives don't use that phrase.

Glad I got that off my chest. I'm talking about my confusion, not Chris' knees as he holds me down while Truth fills my face to overflowing with man-butter. Well, maybe a little of both...

Exactly that kind of thinking led some of the brightest people of another millennium to conclude that it's impossible to hit a tortoise with an arrow and impossible to move from point A to point B.
No man, experiments, empirical knowledge, that's the shit. Got a suspect? Red hot needles under the toenails will fix your theoretical thought knots in a blink.

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I think you guys are clones more than ever now.

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Haha I love that shit. Tell me, as a physicist, if you think this is true:

I was told that a tire on a car, when the car is in motion, is going zero Mph at the point where it makes contact with the road. If it wasn't at rest at that point the car wouldn't move, or something. Is that a real statement of physics or another one of those silly "can't outrun a hamstrung midget" paradoxes?

I also heard that Pi is actually 4.0, and that a fat kid ate the rest. HA LOL!

You've seen a pic of me, you must surely notice how significantly more handsome I am.

Haha I've been talking to Dyldo Dylderton off-site about dreams, and some of the dreams we've had involving members of MT. It reminded me that I had a dream about Chris a couple of years ago, back when I first started posting my awesome knowledges on a regular basis. I dreamt that Chris invited me to his home in sunny Massachusetts, and was showing me around his garden and introducing me to his family etc. Like, we were bestest friends. The strangest thing about it is that I woke up with an erection.

I think TruthDevoid dreamt about me once. Dylan had two dreams about me (one of which involved me being a balding 50-year-old paedophile). Who else has been violating copyright law by having my effigy appear in their dreams without my consent? I think Chris is the only one I've dreamt about...unless the time Bobbi came to my house dressed in a leather catsuit was a dream, but the scarring on my back and the teeth marks on my headboard seem to indicate otherwise. Man, I didn't shit right for a week!

Omg, you said you wouldn't tell! Actually that was BassBehemoth when his hair was really long. I gave him a 5 gallon bucket of protein powder in exchange.

And I've always loved you and Amadeus for your minds.

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I'd do just about anything for 5 gallons of protein.

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Isn't that just a nice way of saying "you're a couple of ugly bastards and I wouldn't fuck you with the lights on if you paid me which, incidentally, is a prerequisite to any slippy funtimes you might be after"?

If you want 5 gallons of protein I have a patent pending protein delivery system I'd like to test on ya

Umm, no. You'll just have to do the Peter Griffin/Kathy Ireland thing if you're so into it.

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I don't know about that "factoid". I'm no physicist (anymore), but that just plain don't make none sense.

I don't know why, but Paddy is the only person on MT I've had a dream about (or that I remember). And two!? What the hell. Why do I think about him? I've never even seen a picture of the fucking guy.

WE WANT A PICTURE NOT A BELLY ITCHER!

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I actually had a dream with TD in it, he used his cell phone and then became a zombie

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Wanna buy a picture of him? It's real purdy.

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From clones to cardboard cutouts! Laaadies aaaund gentleeaamen, monkeys in hats approaching in a screen near you!



It's most certainly true. Think about it - if the bottom of the tire was moving with respect to the ground, what would it actually do? At t=0s it would be at point A and at t=1s that same part of the tire would be at point B. That is, it would be sliding. Bear in mind that we're talking about the linear speed in the frame of reference of the ground, not the angular speed, which is the same for every point on the tire with a given radius.

And I don't think it's possible to outrun a hamstrung midget. It could come at me armed with a battle axe, two machine guns and a calculating expression, the sheer sheerness of the situation could incapacitate just about anyone.



You had caner didn't you? You did say you have cancer? Tell me, is it a bad cancer? Is it really, truly, exquisitely painful? You can tell me. Don't hesitate.

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That should be the first line in a love song about me. Make it happen!

I'll consider giving you a pic in private - maybe, if your medical comes back clean and I think you're able to take it - but for everyone else:

http://hosting01.hotchyx.com/adult-...3/5998PADDY.png

Hahaha there's a movie waiting to happen!

Monkeys in hats is SO last week! Haven't you heard? Chimps in capes is where it's at these days!

It's a strange ol' universe we live in, especially when seen through the eyes of physics or indeed quantum leap physics, the most sciency of all physicses. ZIGGY!!!!!!!!!1

I love finding shit like this out, because it's pretty bizarre stuff and you don't need to blast yourself into a black hole in order to find it. It's all around us, inside us and tied up in my basement under a big pile of cardboard boxes.

Speaking of midgets, I'm thinking of suing the estate of one David Lynch for violation of my privacy by stealing my brain-pictures and putting them to smooth jazz:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B0CGzPaJUOE

Nah, I just wish I did every time I read one of your posts.

MWAAAAAAAAAA!

The true reward of mathematics is when you stop misunderstanding it as a pile of knowledge and instead let it augment your thinking; improving it where you already had some idea and becoming your thinking where you didn't.

And fuck yea, sue every last penny out of that bigheaded brain fucker. I don't know how many times I sat through Mulholand drive, but I do know that I hated frickin JOORAAANDO after half that number of times.

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I don't know as I ever thought about it, but even if feet didn't stop and grip they'd slide and where would you be? Right on your can.

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You won`t believe how extreme I freaked out when I saw that actually a midget chef is cutting the onions at one of my fav restaurants

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We have a crime rubrication in Sweden that might be translated as "Railing against an ethnic group". All things considered, do you think we're up for a collective charge under that heading?


I just found out. There's a television series here entering its second season, great results. It's about people going shopping at a huge mall. Yep, reality show style. While I work about four hours a day gathering and assessing info and news, working to put together a reasoned and comprehensive reason for people to vote the 19 of September to keep my beloved government in office for another four years... they are watching... a series about...

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a series about.......bullshit. I don't know if it's considered a reality show, but I caught about 3 minutes of Silent Library and some guy got towel snapped on the butt in the library by football players with rolled up towels. They could have at least been cute. I cannot believe the calibre of some of the stuff on tv now. It's so stupid.

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More people voted for their favourite would-be pop star in Britain's Got Talent than voted during the general election. Give it up man, we're fucked!

Welcome to our world. I heard there's a new show, The Fitzkitchen's Fits.

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Show a little respect for my uncle Gerry Fitzkitchens and his brain-melting epilepsy.

But he's so much fun to watch! You're a party pooper.

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Say, Tripple-X, has his brain actually melted in any of the episodes yet? I'm asking, 'cause I'm trying to ascertain the possibility of Padds carrying around any lethal, and preferably highly painful, genetical disorder. It's become something of an obsession ever since that pie-post. Arrgh.



Aaawwn, heeall no! Honestly, I think instigating a revolution, seizing power and organizing death squads targeting anyone who can't give three valid reason for the way they voted in the last election is closer at hand. The screams, the blood, the flames, the upturned IQ-charts...

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I think most of it is gone now thanks to the Illudium Q-36 Explosive Space Modulator that I purchased on ebay. I don't know what I'm going to use it for now. Maybe a garden ornament?

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Fucking yum.

http://www.cargurus.com/blog/2009/1...lusive-supercar

Nice, but it might get recalled. It is a Toyauto product.

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I remember stormfront being one of the first google results on some issue going on with the immigrant and nationalist community there.

My sweet joke about Pi is what has led you to question my critical faculties? That, and not the several years of uninterrupted stool-water I've let gush from my face-anus (aka mouth)? Ha! Which is of course the element name for hahnium, which is the funniest character in the entire periodic table, especially so when you realise why it doesn't officially appear there. HA!

I think a cull is sorely needed, but I'd never actively seek out such a policy because I know I'd be the first one to be lured into the gas chamber by a slightly overweight brunette with big tits and low self-esteem. Ahh, they get me every time!

So that's what you really think of me? pftftftft

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I didn't say "I know I'd be the first one to be lured into the gas chamber by the mother of those two guys from Deliverance" did I? NO, I didn't! I said "I want to be kick-fucked by a burly female lumberjack, or Patrik in a dress". Or something like that. I can't remember, it was so long ago.

What the fuck is wrong with the irish at the moment? Radical catholics? The end is near mah friendz

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Random Boner Syndrome

This is pissing me off. Even during times of regular sex I still get the most random boners. And now I swear I'm getting the worst prolonged cases of morning wood in my life. And masturbation sure as hell doesn't help, and I'm pretty sure it just makes it worse.

LETS ALL SHARE OUR BONER STORIES.

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Haha I take it the rioting has made international news? Apparently it's been the worst rioting in a decade, costing upwards of £100,000,000. Ahh I'm so proud!

Man, you're only hitting 21, your cock still has a ways to go before it behaves like something other than a paedophile maternity nurse

I don't have any particularly interesting boner stories, but I did once jerk the gherkin in class in primary school, whilst I was sitting in a row of joined desks with people on either side of me working on long division problems. No one noticed, not even when I yelled "Jumanji!" at the top of my voice just as I shot a clot into my Ghostbusters pencil case.

I think that may have been the beginning of my paedophilia. I mean, I was pretty attracted to other 10 years olds when I was 10 myself, and I guess my tastes just haven't changed much in the intervening years. I'm set in my ways, in other words. Fuck it, that defence works for old people and it'll work for me ya mothercockers!

You owe me a new monitor and a Gatorade.

Ian, maybe you have some kind of priapism-lite? If you need someone to help you out with dangily that, I know a fringlec guy that knows a dude that is wozlcabeb a mortician and can flubberty mangily kooster ma rangs.

Werkmalink? Frombalerser!? Minkclepd!?! Finkerly ountraw, bibbilytinkle-flop bosterdonk gershurkalnk miskerink kooster ma rangs! Gibblysoostertwink purlyyink.. FINKERLY! FINKERLY!!! OUNTRAW FINKERLY!!! 911! BIBBILYTINKLE-FLOP BOSTERDONK!

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Baaaaahaha! I also fingered my first girl in primary school, but I'm not sure if it counts because it was only last week. Man, if you've ever wondered if there was anything tighter than your own clenched fist...

No no, your keyboard goes into the PS/2 port, not the wall socket.

Finkerly? Finkerly McFinkertimes? How the fuck do you know The Finkmeister?

Normally at times like these I'd tell you to have some hair of the dog, but given your track record you'd probably think that entails eating out some post-op meat-packer from one of your queer Friday night haunts.

Amadeus, for some reason I thought you were from Antwerp but I now realise that it's Wolf who's from there. Boy is my face red! Not out of embarrassment, I'm trying to hold my breath to see if I'll cum harder. Using a belt is too risky, especially while my mum's in the room flicking herself off to Baywatch.

Actually, I'm prepared to let that one slip with a shrug. Don't relax, however. That pun is gonna come back to haunt you in the form of broken bottles in your bed, or anthrax in your mail, or, or, or, I don't know, but something that's gonna have the CDC in an uproar for weeks I tell ya.

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I dated a guy by that name once. I couldn't see myself as Bobbi Bosterdonk though.

Joe', don't worry about the tent pole. It will regulate itself. Quit wearing tighty whities and just think of Paddy with your sister as soon as you awaken. That should cure you.

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Hahaha, Bobbi Bosterdonk... you sound like a gay porn actress in the world of Teletubbies. I'm also very pleased that I created a pre-existing name in my gibberish rage.

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Let's bury the hatchet (metaphorically, obviously). I come bearing gifts by way of a peace offering. The gifts are images, and the images are of something I think you'll like:

| 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 |

I think this is as close to "make-up sex" as you and I are ever likely to come. Savour it. Savour its savoury yumminess.

We've been through this; thumping a man on the back of the head with your elbow while he's changing a "popped" tire on your car and then bundling his lifeless body into a sack and rolling him on top of you doesn't constitute a "date". Nor does tumbling his musky body from your pickup truck as you drive by his kids' school the next morning at 40Mph.

What are you taking about? Joe invited me to fuck his fat sister only last week! He explained to me how difficult it is for members of his family to get laid because they all resemble asshole movie stars and that the only chance his sister would ever have of experiencing the thick, bulbous, vulva-thumping meat-train that is my schlong is to beg me. The funny thing is, I don't even find her to be that unattractive; Wesley Snipes is a handsome man.

hahahahaha I never even thought of that! He could be her fucking twin! If only you had brought that up while you were fucking her, then she REALLY would have given you a ride.

btw I think she knows the number you gave her is fake and won't shut up about the whole matter. I told her your phone is probably just off, but she keeps insisting that no phone number could possibly contain 14 digits.

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Paddy, I wasn't going 40 mph. It was a 35 limit and I wouldn't speed.

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That's right, the old and responsible need to set an example for the young uns' to follow.



There's something deeply disturbing about all this, and given enough time I'll nail down what it is. In the meantime, I'm off to count wild boars. Seriously.

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Hmmm, I'm not so sure about that; when I was pounding yo mama's mouth like a Black & Decker power drill rattling around inside a mouse's eye socket I commented to her about how much she resembles Fred Flintstone, and instead of smiling and biting down harder she spat my cock out and told me to leave the bathroom so she could finish her shit in peace. Rule #1: never insult a lady when you're seconds away from filling her face with salty sea monkey brine.

Didn't she catch on to the fact that it was fake when she saw that it was comprised entirely of letters and dollar signs?

You're not trying to "level up" in World of Warcraft, are ya?

Fuck no, I'm serious. Wild boars started to invade this country a few years back and hunters and authorities are scrambling to get some sort of reliable estimate on how many the little big fuckers are. Now, I noted when reading about it that the team working on it are ecologists, biologists, zoologists... but not a single mathematician in sight. So, I've set out to do an estimate myself, using Bayesian methods. How's it going? The last time I tried to run Winbugs with the calculation it iterated at me for ten minutes and then said one hundred and forty millions. Somehow, I'm feeling a bit sceptic.

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Those are a big problem down in our southern states. Start feeding them birth control and have open season on them. They're vicious things. YOU be careful if you go anywhere near their domains, too.

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I'm still 50/50 on whether or not this is all an elaborate euphemism for going to a singles bar.

I thought they were talking about Cougars.

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I fucked a cougar once. I'm scarred for life. No really.

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Seriously? Badass man

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Only once?

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Oldest I went must've been 29. How does that classify next to generic?


Anyway, WHO HAS THE VELVET CREATION DEMO BY EUCHARIST!?

ALL over their shit, especially the demo's then, but can't find the demo for A Velvet Creation anywhere, and since it has Floating on there it'd guarantee jizzing.

Anyone?

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Generic? Do mean geriatric or are you referring to Truth's blow-up girlfriend?

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Biggest age gap I had was when I was 17 I banged a 27 year old. I'll probably never top that.

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Damn Dyldo! My biggest age gap was 6 years, but even she was only 26... you've had an interesting experience.

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It isn't typically necessary to have a mathemetician around for most ecologically related matters. Not that you aren't helpful in the situation at all, just that any biologist (including ecologists and zoologists) has taken at least 4 college math courses, and the general math involving population biology and ecology (i.e. the sort one would use to count population size during such an invasion) is relatively simple. I'm not saying it would be fun for someone who has been out of college for a few years to just up and learn, but relatively simple math nonetheless. I figure it has to be if I can do it. Having you around is just an excuse for the biologists to be lazy, or maybe just to back up and/or check their data for errors if they get sloppy.

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Haha, well, first of all, absolutely no one know about me. I'm just nipping data all over the place and no one knows what I'm actually doing with it. The background is really a preliminary analysis my father showed me a few months back... and it was just embarrassing. What I found when I read up some more is that a) They're using very simplistic models and b) The way they work might very well waste a lot of time needlessly. Thing is, as far as I've found, ecologists around here aren't very good at using more advanced statistics at all, even when it could be of great benefit. I just had this idea that Bayesian analysis might be the shit and thought, "What the heck, let's try and see what happens".
But you know, I'm doing it the proper way, no prestige involved. I'll put my hypothesis together, present it, defend it as long as I have some sort of straw to grasp at. If it fails, well, then we've learned that this particular model doesn't work and if it turns out it works, then all that remains is to bask in the glory. In this particular case I'll be happy to leave the experimental work to others.

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Those simple models are usually incredibly accurate so long as it isn't assumed that the wrong model will fit the situation, which could be the case. That being said, you're obvious not fucking anything up or getting in the way and might, in fact, turn out to be a help down the line. The funny thing is biologists do regularly make use of Bayesian analysis; particularly those working with taxonomy & systematics, genetics, cell & molecular biology, and microbiology.

Bayesian analysis is no stranger to the fields of ecology and population biology, either. In fact, there are books about it (which I have been recommended to read; haven't yet). That being said, ecology and pops generally tends to work toward problems from the perspective of frequency and probability; the application of inverse probability may indeed be valid in your case, but ignored or unrecognized.

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That's the problem, in Sweden we only have a few years of data. Frequentist models are always dragging the weakness of lacking real predictable power; I mean, the only thing you can say is that given a huge number of experiments of this particular type, the grand total of this particular outcome will happen this often. When you use Bayesian and are allowed to use prior data you're in a completely different situation. What I'm doing is utilizing data from Poland - same species, similar environment, fuckloads of data. Use what limited statistics we do have here; it's akin to what some have done when assessing a population from removal data.
Most other models fall pretty short here, from what I've read. The logistic and the rest in that family aren't of much use - insufficient data - and as for null hypothesis, setup something non-trivial and I'll buy you a beer.

I get the impression that the overall embracing of Bayesian and other more advanced statistical models have come a lot further over there than here. From what I can see in my literature list, most authors in the various fields of biology seem to come from Canada and the US.

My personal favorite for a primer book is "Bayesian methods for ecology" by McCarthy, hands down.

But yea, like I said. I do this mostly for fun, to see if it checks out. It's very easy to test, since the group at Grimsö have setup several large test enclosures to evaluate various models. If it works, great, if not, no big deal. I've learnt more about ecology and wild boars than I ever intended.

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Sames in the US.

Dyldo loses my birthday challenge. I am so hurt I may transform into another principle part of the male anatomy.

Incidentally, if they didn't include a mathematician in the initial group it's most likely not because they hoped to encourage amateur chainsaw enthusiasts. Though I suppose I don't know much about this style of songwriting.

FUCK. Well, I wasn't too far off in my head. Thread delivered.

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Now now, I don't really see where the snide comments are coming from. After all, you don't know all my credentials from three photos, ey? Doesn't really reflect on two years of university studies; much of which I've been doing double time, plus summer courses. Incidentally in fields like multivariable analysis and statistics, not to mention the eight books on ecology etc. I've ploughed through since early April. Yes, apart from the regular courses which, well what do you know, speak of the devil, were about solid mechanics, hydromechanics and statistics. Don't ask me how many (yes, peer reviewed, what else?) publications concerning the subject I'm working on.
Not to mention, I have been asked to do it by someone with a fairly high official position and direct interest in the matter. Not to mention, nothing wrong with testing something which it doesn't appear someone else is currently doing, it's fun and a good way to learn. After all, you don't do science with credentials, you do it with prior knowledge and ideas.

Now, I'm not entirely sure why you went off on a tangent about this like it was something important, or, for that matter, like I was obstructing something. Needless to say, I don't give a fuck beyond this post.

Nope. A cup of tea'd be the shit.

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I can share mine if you like iced tea, unsweetened, brewed this morning. I don't think there's too much slobber in it.

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Hoji-Cha is the fucking shit. Its roasted Bancha. I have so much green tea I should be raped and killed IMHO.

I should take a picture of it all.

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I'm not a huge tea fanatic, but once or twice a year a friend of mine comes back from China and brings some pretty good (and expensive) Oolong, Red, and Green teas. He gave me a tin of some Oolong tea that was something like $1-2 a bag. Yeah, he's rich.

I've also been on a fish cooking frenzy. When I can do it, I like going out to this fresh shanty that is out in the middle of a local harbor and picking up some of the daily catch. Last time I went there, a few weeks ago, I bought some Wahoo, Clams, Shrimp, and Scallops. Fuck that was good eating. My favorite fish to cook though, I think, is Mahi Mahi. I prefer to pan-sear most fish over grilling.

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Dude I love fish. I just cooked some Ralphs Value Catfish

I've cooked King Crab Legs (AMAZING) and I eat a shitload of tuna. I also love fucking sushi (no joke, I fuck fish to death then eat them).

Also have some Swai in the freezer. I suggest you come cook me up some of your fish, though.

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Haha, "Ralph's Value Catfish".. that sounds a little fishy. Har! From my expierence with Swai, it's a lot like Catfish. Cheaper, too.

Its pretty hard to go wrong with Crab if you're just going to eat it straight (my favorite way). Goodness all around. How much did you pay per pound for that King Crab?

I'm actually not too crazy about Tuna. It depends on how it is prepared. Oddly enough, one of my favorite sushi rolls is spicy Tuna. My most favorite of resaurants just recently got bought out by a sushi/"Asian fushion" place about a month ago. I'm actually really sad about it, but I went up there a few days ago and it is a pretty good, slightly higher-end place with a pretty large Saki collection. The head waiter that used to work there is still employed which is great because he told the new owners I was an old customer so they let me try a bunch of sushi and different top-shelf Sakis.

Right after I wrote my previous post, I started jonesing for some Mahi, so I went out and bought some. Good eatin' tonight! But hey, if you want to come pick me up, I'd be happy to cook for you and whoever. Invite some girlies over and we'll have our self's a time. You can help out too if you want, so we can make their knees buckle twice is one night. The last time I cooked fish for a couple of my friends, the "foodier" one came up to me and gave me a hug after his first bite.

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I'd just like to take this moment and point out, as a professional Chef, that Dyldo cannot, in fact, cook anything.

Dude I'm all about finding hidden talents... I search for those in training and turn them into Gods! Soon you will laugh when the Dylanian Gourmet Seafood Restaurant opens right under your nose... how's that for a birthday present!

Returning to a more realistic level of conversation, I bought the King Crab legs for something a little over $10 per pound. I didn't even eat it with butter, but it tasted great. I once had a lobster burrito at this fancy Mexican place... and man did that change my views about Mexicans... apparently the lazy bastards steal recipes from other cultures.

And overall I have to say that canned tuna sucks when compared to pretty much anything you can think of... smoked salmon, oysters, anchovies, eel (FUCK YES), squid, crab, lobster, blah blah blah. But, fresh spicy tuna sushi gives me a fucking boner. Definitely have to side with the Fried Eel (Unagi as opposed to Anago) as an all time favorite.

I just ate at this Thai restaurant and got Fried Shrimp Won-Ton. It was absolutely delicous when paired with that orange spicy sweet & sour sauce.

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I can fry your mom's hymen in my semen; purée some of her thick menstrual blood with skinned roasted red bell peppers to drizzle on top and you've got yourself a world class meal.

Rich, did you go to culinary school or did you just pick up the trade working around?

Ian: Yeah, I actually prefer my crab without butter. If its a good fresh crab, its got plenty of taste on its own.

My friend's girlfriend is Athabaskan and a good portion of her family lives way out in Alaska. They go up there every year or so and they bring back the absolute greatest smoked salmon I've ever, ever had.

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Me, too, otherwise I get tummy willies and don't feel good later.

So what's the best way to cook catfish and what's the best size to catch bullheads? If they're still in the neighbor's pond there's some over 3 feet long. Would those be too old? Yes, I've fileted my own catch before.

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I love fish. I eat a couple of cans of tuna per day, though these days I have a hard time finding cheap, good-tasting chunk light other than Starkist. Walmart is always out of Starkist and it's more than a dollar per can at the supermarket these days. Gay.

I love sushi. Should go without saying. I love shellfish and mollusks even more, maybe. Crab, lobster, cuttlefish, octopus, squid, scallops, clams, mussels, oysters, etc... love all that shit. I subsist mostly on the cheap, canned stuff and it works for me. I don't have a fancy palette, so it's delicious.

My favorite fish is salmon, by far, but I enjoy tilapia more and more... I greatly enjoy the taste, it's cheap, and it's ecologically sound to harvest in vast amounts, unlike most of the more popular fish. My least favorite fish (unless you count "anchovies" as a REAL fish) is cod; ate too much of it as a kid. It's cheap and widespread in New England, and was the fish my mother was most likely to buy at the supermarket. Plus, she is and was a terrible cook.

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lol Probably when you get another 20 years older bad tasting cod will be a comfort food to ya.
If you seafood eaters ever start feeling foot pain specifically in your big toe it's an arthritic condition called gout and it's horrendously painful. Cherries and cherry juice are helpful for it, but best to avoid it if you can. It's a build up of uric acid crystals. My husband had it a couple times, but the last time he couldn't walk for awhile it was so painful and his toe was so swelled that he couldn't put a slipper on.

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I would only eat seafood if there was nothing else left on the planet to eat

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No C-school.

And speaking as somebody who's seen Dyldo try to perform simple acts in the kitchen, and their results (having to go to a Chipotle to get food), I feel safe regarding the Dyldolonian Seafood Empire.

How fuckin cool is your ava?!!?!!!!1
Seafood is great. I love shrimps and crabs. Especially shrimps. In garlic oil or in a tomato-cream-sauce

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Hmm... well last night I ate at Ichibans! Got some assorted sushi there (something, salmon, and yellowtail) along with Teriyaki Chicken, Miso Soup, Rice, and salad. Fucking great. And fucking expensive.

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