these 2 guys make chuck norris look like a pussy.
optimus prime? yeah hes a pussy too.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jack_Churchill
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Simo_H%C3%A4yh%C3%A4

I got two words for ya: BURT REYNOLDS.

helll nah!

Wasn't this closed? You can post stuff like this in one of the stange/interesting internet threads.

If you like shit like this I'd google Cracked.com's "List of men that make Rambo look like a pussy" or something like that. Your Finny boy is on there.

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Haha I closed it then opened it again thinking I was a little too hasty/stringent.

Meh, I'm too nice for this mod lark.

You're much too sweet for this life.

But really, if anyone where to get offended by a mod just trying to keep their forum tidy then they can.. THEY CAN JUST.. THEY CAN COUNT THEIR DICK!

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Oh my god that's the BEST thing I've read in a long time hahaha. Those guys are the top 5 most badass things that ever walked this earth. That is such a good list. That site has a lot of great stuff like that.

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Those stories are incredible. But I'm not sure why I didn't make the list..?

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FUCKKK
can't get to it from school.

You're missing out. Such an amazing article. Jack Churchill should have made it on there though.

By the way, "FUCKKK" looks hilarious under your avatar. An unintended caption.

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cause complaining on facebook about waking up early doesn't count as badassery lol!

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Plus there's nothing particularly badass about contracting polio and later becoming adept at photoshopping.

hahahahah touche!

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D&Q vs TD
1 : 0

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Jack Churchill is my idol. If I wasn't engaged I might be tempted to join the military for similar purposes.

hahhaaha yeah right. the recruiter would probably just laugh at you

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But we'll never know because he's engaged! HE'S ENGAGED GUYS! HE'S ENGAGED!!!!

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Yeah, From what I hear if you try to do anything stupid they chew your ass off and put you into place.

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Just like many soldiers in the field. Badam.

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I've told so many people about cracked.com

but some of their linked videos are retarded and not funny.

wait is requiem on facebook? requiem, are you on facebook? we've played some OMGPOP together, but that's about all our online interaction. I don't want to make your soon-to-be jealous, though.

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FUCKKKKKKK!

That really makes your avatar less threatening. The tilt of it's head makes it look like he's limp in a wheelchair.

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i'll make him shoopdawhoop.
will that make all of you feel a bit better about it?

You're a bunch of wannabes.

z0MFG he posted that when it was 4:20!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
troll the fuck out

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wait...
how do you know he posted that at 4:20 for that matter?



.....YER ONE O' DEM ALIEN MINDREEDURS ARENT YUH!?

Right above your avatar says the date.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Floyd_James_Thompson
Not the most triumphant ending but still.. holy fuck.

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You're a fag.

It says 20:20 for me. I hate you guys.

You can carry 24 oz of weed with you in Oregon... wtf. But here in Cali there are still way more customers.

And while I'm on the topic, this guy isn't really epic. but at the same time, he almost is: http://www.theage.com.au/articles/2...4360762037.html

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Gacy, GG Allin, Jubal Early (although fictional, the most kickass cameo fucking ever), Al Swearengen (he was real)

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You consider Gacy an epic man? John Wayne Gacy? The dude that raped and killed ~33 dudes?

Speaking of Gacy, a couple years back a friend of my Mother's who writes screenplays got hired to do a movie about someone who's name I've forgotten that helped invent modern criminal profiling.. anyway this man had hundreds and hundreds of hours of classified or private confessional tapes of all the big serial killers. I was lucky enough to get to see a few hours of Gacy, Kemper, and a few others. It was fucking chilling hearing them describe in absolute nonchalant placidness how they went about killing who and how it felt.

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Talking to psychopaths really is kind of disconcerting. That total lack of empathy, it's like standing at the very edge of a cliff, knowing full well that the two hundred meters and the rocks at the bottom doesn't give a flying fuck about wether you fall or not. To make the analogy complete, ad a vulture, who wouldn't mind at all if you did crash into a state of dinnerhood, circling overhead.


Speaking of cliffs, this guy is pretty epic in his own right; being a hiker and climber myself, I find it appealing to know that he exists. It's a matter of "If he could, so could I".
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joe_Simpson_(mountaineer)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Touching_the_Void

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Great analogy. Although with these cliffs and vultures, they'd like you to fall.

Yeah, I've seen that documentary and it was fucking intense. I can't remember though.. what happened between the two of them after he managed to crawl back?

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Well, first up his pal got scared shitless by Simpson's agonized moaning, thinking it was a banshee crawling around outside his tent. I don't really remember what happened after that; I imagine the whole thing could have put some strain on the relationship, but whatever. The only thing I'm interested in is that he crawled down, across a big fucking glacier, from the top of a a mountain. Dragging a broken leg and keeping warm by pissing himself. I mean, the worst I've ever had to endure was dragging my sorry ass across the pass from Yoho glacier valley after sliding a few meters down a smooth cliff wall and spraining an ankle, but still, it was nice to have Simpson's story in the back of my head. Put the whole thing in perspective.

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Don't forget about Aron Ralston. The dude that had to cut his own arm off with a dull pocket knife and then some.. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aron_Ralston

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Well, a man's gotta do what man gotta do. Still, that story isn't so much of an epic man as of a stupid man; you head out on your own into the back country and don't tell anyone roughly where you'll be and when you should be expected to call in, then whatever happens you've got coming to you. Sure, kudos for getting out of it, but don't expect any abundance of sympathy from me. Just saying.

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not... epic... enough...

One of the attributes that all these men in these seemingly impossible survival stories have in common is the will to live and ability to pull up their boot straps and preserver through whatever the gods throw at them until the limited body can no longer support the will's infinite strength. I'm not saying that this Aron R story one-ups the Touching the Void (the survival story, not the porno) at all, but sawing off your arm with a dull and weak pocket knife, repelling down a few hundred feet, and then walking for miles and miles is a great example of just that attribute: this man's will to live. Sure, this could have been avoided if he had alerted someone of his plans but that doesn't really matter. So come on, give him a little more than just a paltry kudos!

By the way, let’s not just limit this thread to just survival stories (as adequate as they are). Writers, poets, monks, scientists, myself, musicians, or just personal heroes!

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Most of whom were teenage boys, it should be noted.

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yeah man, you're being a bit harsh here. 99% of people couldn't do what he did. Whether he was smart or not in planning his adventure is besides the point here.

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if we're talking about epic serial killers might i add in Richard Chase?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richard_Chase

NAZIS!? UFOS!? MAC AND CHEESE!? EPICC!!!

Epic? more like evolution fucked up

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That is pretty epic

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Do you sexist cunts ever spare a thought for the epic women of the world? Marie Curie discovered two elements, created the theory of radioactivity and won two Nobel prizes, AND she didn't have to knife anyone to get 'em.

Rosa Parks told a bunch of 1950s burly white Alabama cops to go fuck themselves when they told her to get out of her whites-only seat. "Fuck you, cracka!" she yelled.

The old IRA had a female wing called the Cumann na mBan. They baked cakes of inferior quality to drive the British back home! Haha nah, they were complicit in many murders.

Annie Sullivan taught Helen Keller how to suck cocks (I read between the lines).

Mary Edwards Walker was a POW during the American Civil War and is the only woman to have received the Medal of Honour.

Our very own Bobbi pioneered the art of smuggling bags of meat down the back of her trousers. At least I hope that's what she's been doing.

Am I attractive to girls yet?