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Old 2009-08-18, 18:39
MetalThrashingMad's Avatar
MetalThrashingMad
Death to all but metal!
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Thumbs up RTT #156: CRIB DEEAAAATH!!

Most of you cunts aren't nearly thrash enough to get this one
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
"Ja mein little poodle, I will hang you by your nipples in my garage,
 
Old 2009-08-18, 18:40
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,542
first


like thats an accomplishment...
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I dont have any funny quotes

NEGROGENESIS


 
Old 2009-08-18, 18:42
MetalThrashingMad's Avatar
MetalThrashingMad
Death to all but metal!
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First one to guess the band gets a big wet rimjob from Darko! And he gives great reach-arounds too!
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
"Ja mein little poodle, I will hang you by your nipples in my garage,
 
Old 2009-08-18, 19:12
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Ger., North
Posts: 2,593
E-X-E
Cuntooooo
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-18, 19:21
Requiem
Post-whore
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
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Posts: 6,940
 
Old 2009-08-18, 20:29
Wolfsherz
Post-whore
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Antwerp
Posts: 1,472
Creature of duty



AND MY DUTY IS DEATH
__________________
So this Georgian Olympian runs into a bar

Aosoth - New album III out now on Agonia Recs
Epoch - bass, guitars, drums, MetaStasizing out asap
Asphixa - bass, demo out asap
Adustum - bass, guitars, full length out soon on XXXXXXXXXX recs

Quote:
Originally Posted by far_beyond_sane
Tetianblood? ... Well, 'Necrosemen' to you too. Twat.
 
Old 2009-08-19, 00:09
MetalThrashingMad's Avatar
MetalThrashingMad
Death to all but metal!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
E-X-E
Cuntooooo

googlewhore If you got that off the top of your head thats pretty good though.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
"Ja mein little poodle, I will hang you by your nipples in my garage,
 
Old 2009-08-19, 00:12
guitar_demon's Avatar
guitar_demon
MotörCat
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: &#26132&#26132
Posts: 7,547
Quote:
Originally Posted by Requiem

no it is EXE
__________________
POW MIA NEVER FORGOTTEN
no one can tell you to turn down your amp unless they're of higher skill or in your band
Why not make shit up as we go-fox
Ok. You're literate, intelligent and funny-FBS

"Calm down, Edgar back in your cage"-far beyond sane
"you suck the cat-avatar-guy doesnt"-The Doc
Now My Legacy Shall Live Forever!!
 
Old 2009-08-19, 00:16
guitar_demon's Avatar
guitar_demon
MotörCat
 
Join Date: Oct 2002
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though there was a death metal band named broken hope that had a song called crib death too
__________________
POW MIA NEVER FORGOTTEN
no one can tell you to turn down your amp unless they're of higher skill or in your band
Why not make shit up as we go-fox
Ok. You're literate, intelligent and funny-FBS

"Calm down, Edgar back in your cage"-far beyond sane
"you suck the cat-avatar-guy doesnt"-The Doc
Now My Legacy Shall Live Forever!!
 
Old 2009-08-19, 00:24
blitz906's Avatar
blitz906
Okay.
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 4,137
Scrotum pimples.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
 
Old 2009-08-19, 00:56
The Execrator's Avatar
The Execrator
Noob lud
 
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Location: Upstate New Yaawwk
Posts: 3,499
Quote:
Originally Posted by guitar_demon
though there was a death metal band named broken hope that had a song called crib death too

That makes two bands who chose a fucking horrible song name.

But it makes for one excellent and exciting RTT title, nice job Steve
__________________
9/23

Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Please excuse me for I currently have a terminal erection, and the only cure is midget-cunny.
 
Old 2009-08-19, 01:54
MetalThrashingMad's Avatar
MetalThrashingMad
Death to all but metal!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by guitar_demon
though there was a death metal band named broken hope that had a song called crib death too

I gotta see if I can soulseek that

Quote:
Originally Posted by The Execrator
That makes two bands who chose a fucking horrible song name.

It's very humorous and captures the true silliness and intent of fun of thrash in the 80's
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
"Ja mein little poodle, I will hang you by your nipples in my garage,
 
Old 2009-08-19, 07:08
TruthDevoid's Avatar
TruthDevoid
Drugged Unholy
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Philadelphia Area
Posts: 2,458
I fucking love being intoxicated. Really.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalThrashingMad
I don't know about you, but I deadlift because I strive to be the first human tree stump pulling machine


Quote:
Originally Posted by viewer_from_nihil
the song serial cocksucker changed my life


Quote:
Originally Posted by BassBehemoth
Are you going to snort cheap pharmaceutical drugs with your lizard as well?
 
Old 2009-08-19, 07:30
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalThrashingMad
googlewhore If you got that off the top of your head thats pretty good though.


Nope haven`t googled. And when you search for crib death guess what the first 10,000 pages will be about. I could even tell you that they got a song called "Seek and Destroy" and "Slayer". I really like thrash metal
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-19, 07:55
Soulinsane's Avatar
Soulinsane
Pirate Lawd
 
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Location: Hanger 18
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I hate you all.
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Authorized Mercury Magnetics tech/dealer
 
Old 2009-08-19, 09:16
JoeYngVai's Avatar
JoeYngVai
Vaginal Warts
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: I live in a giant bucket.
Posts: 2,289
Quote:
Originally Posted by TruthDevoid
I fucking love being intoxicated. Really.


+1

we should party... I'm pretty sure it will be fun
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2009-08-19, 11:12
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
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Posts: 2,593
Quote:
Originally Posted by Soulinsane
I hate you all.


This whole forum is built on hate and music
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-19, 13:20
blitz906's Avatar
blitz906
Okay.
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 4,137
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
This whole forum is built on hate and music

And lust
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
 
Old 2009-08-19, 17:57
bunny's Avatar
bunny
Guardian of Lost Souls
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: deep in my own world...........(northern ireland)
Posts: 584
my buttons from my button swap arrived today (diff forum) & they are purdy!! taking pics now & will post linky when they are up

edit: clicky to my buttons received from the button swap i took part in

how is everyone today? i'm fuckin' dog tired but gonna do a bit of studying in a wee bit,

edit: off to do some studying now,

laters,

bunny xxx
__________________
"I can see why the name 'bernie' suits you....I mean you're black, smell dead and are completely inane" as he looked at me with wary eyes.

----

"Bunny is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside a clump of smegma" one of the other inmates describing me.

Last edited by bunny : 2009-08-19 at 18:30.
 
Old 2009-08-19, 18:36
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Ger., North
Posts: 2,593
These are sure really some nice..........buttons :-|
I think tomorrow I`m starting to collect guitars.

BTW: Anyone heard the new Slayer Song "Hate Worldwide"?
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-19, 19:48
MetalThrashingMad's Avatar
MetalThrashingMad
Death to all but metal!
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Join Date: Mar 2004
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
Nope haven`t googled. And when you search for crib death guess what the first 10,000 pages will be about. I could even tell you that they got a song called "Seek and Destroy" and "Slayer". I really like thrash metal

Wellll that makes two of us then

Quote:
Originally Posted by TruthDevoid
I fucking love being intoxicated. Really.

I was sober from everything for about 18 months and hated it (cigarettes and alcohol included). I've almost made up for it this summer
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
"Ja mein little poodle, I will hang you by your nipples in my garage,
 
Old 2009-08-19, 20:08
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,542
being sober kind of sucks but I choose it anyway. I'm such a better person stoned or drunk.

and god damn, something about this college town just makes my balls sweaty and smelly. Just this town. im gonna have to shave this shit
__________________
I dont have any funny quotes

NEGROGENESIS


 
Old 2009-08-19, 22:06
Requiem
Post-whore
 
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Fuck yeah tabbies.
 
Old 2009-08-19, 22:45
blitz906's Avatar
blitz906
Okay.
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 4,137
Quote:
Originally Posted by drawn&quartered
and god damn, something about this college town just makes my balls sweaty and smelly. Just this town. im gonna have to shave this shit



How the hell can a town make your balls smellier?!?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
 
Old 2009-08-20, 01:22
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,542
Quote:
Originally Posted by blitz906


How the hell can a town make your balls smellier?!?

hell if I know.
__________________
I dont have any funny quotes

NEGROGENESIS


 
Old 2009-08-20, 01:55
JoeYngVai's Avatar
JoeYngVai
Vaginal Warts
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: I live in a giant bucket.
Posts: 2,289
I just bought some calcium, vitamin C, and olive oil in an attempt to lessen my muscle twitches everywhere on my body.

I heard that mustard helps, too. I hope I'm not just dying.

Does anybody know if alcohol has a lot to do with muscle spasms? I drink a lot.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2009-08-20, 02:02
MetalThrashingMad's Avatar
MetalThrashingMad
Death to all but metal!
Forum Leader
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Highway to the Danger Zone
Posts: 6,026
Only if you're dehydrated or if you're getting DT's.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
"Ja mein little poodle, I will hang you by your nipples in my garage,
 
Old 2009-08-20, 04:17
BassBehemoth's Avatar
BassBehemoth
Die Young.
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Hellifax, Nova Scotia, Canada
Posts: 8,633
I LUV BOOZE. I LUZ GETTN DRUNK.
__________________
Bitches, Hoes And Corn Rows.

Quote:
Originally Posted by moe_blunts
you done told me lots of thangs bout beer n shit and canada. have a grand ol cunt of a good time.


RIP moe.
 
Old 2009-08-20, 04:45
JoeYngVai's Avatar
JoeYngVai
Vaginal Warts
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: I live in a giant bucket.
Posts: 2,289
I would respond appropriately to that post if it were about 2 months ago... but Bass... WHERE HAS U GONE YOU POST EVERY 5 DAYS.

I'm even friends with you on facebook

we need your input... without a doubt?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2009-08-20, 05:43
TruthDevoid's Avatar
TruthDevoid
Drugged Unholy
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Philadelphia Area
Posts: 2,458
joe, you gotta add me on facebook
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalThrashingMad
I don't know about you, but I deadlift because I strive to be the first human tree stump pulling machine


Quote:
Originally Posted by viewer_from_nihil
the song serial cocksucker changed my life


Quote:
Originally Posted by BassBehemoth
Are you going to snort cheap pharmaceutical drugs with your lizard as well?
 
Old 2009-08-20, 05:53
JoeYngVai's Avatar
JoeYngVai
Vaginal Warts
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: I live in a giant bucket.
Posts: 2,289
what's your facebook?

hahah I found it man, you were the first Waylon I searched for

Time for us t get PERSONAL.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.

Last edited by JoeYngVai : 2009-08-20 at 05:55.
 
Old 2009-08-20, 06:14
TruthDevoid's Avatar
TruthDevoid
Drugged Unholy
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Philadelphia Area
Posts: 2,458
that's fuckin awesome I'm the first that came up. I am superior.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalThrashingMad
I don't know about you, but I deadlift because I strive to be the first human tree stump pulling machine


Quote:
Originally Posted by viewer_from_nihil
the song serial cocksucker changed my life


Quote:
Originally Posted by BassBehemoth
Are you going to snort cheap pharmaceutical drugs with your lizard as well?
 
Old 2009-08-20, 11:15
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Ger., North
Posts: 2,593
I`m thinking of signing up on facebook but I`m so shy

I wasn´t drunk for......almost 1 1/2 months and haven`t drank any alcohol since that day.
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-20, 13:52
BassBehemoth's Avatar
BassBehemoth
Die Young.
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Hellifax, Nova Scotia, Canada
Posts: 8,633
Quote:
Originally Posted by JoeYngVai
I would respond appropriately to that post if it were about 2 months ago... but Bass... WHERE HAS U GONE YOU POST EVERY 5 DAYS.

I'm even friends with you on facebook

we need your input... without a doubt?



haha, I appreciate the gesture, but I've just found better things to occupy my time than MT.

I rarely even drink anymore..once a week max. I'm trying to cut down my weight a bit, and avoiding alcohol helps do that.
__________________
Bitches, Hoes And Corn Rows.

Quote:
Originally Posted by moe_blunts
you done told me lots of thangs bout beer n shit and canada. have a grand ol cunt of a good time.


RIP moe.
 
Old 2009-08-20, 15:57
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,542
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
I`m thinking of signing up on facebook but I`m so shy

I wasn´t drunk for......almost 1 1/2 months and haven`t drank any alcohol since that day.

damn, I thought I was shy.
__________________
I dont have any funny quotes

NEGROGENESIS


 
Old 2009-08-20, 17:17
Requiem
Post-whore
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: terra firma
Posts: 6,940
Never heard of anyone too shy for online social networking. o.0

Quote:
Originally Posted by BassBehemoth
haha, I appreciate the gesture, but I've just found better things to occupy my time than MT.



What would that be?
 
Old 2009-08-20, 17:38
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Ger., North
Posts: 2,593
Quote:
Originally Posted by drawn&quartered
damn, I thought I was shy.


You know this wasn`t meant seriously, don`t you?
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-20, 18:03
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,542
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
You know this wasn`t meant seriously, don`t you?


Hmm..Sorry I don't have the magically sixth sense to pick up sarcasm over the internet.
__________________
I dont have any funny quotes

NEGROGENESIS


 
Old 2009-08-20, 18:05
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Ger., North
Posts: 2,593
Quote:
Originally Posted by drawn&quartered
Hmm..Sorry I don't have the magically sixth sense to pick up sarcasm over the internet.


I don`t have it either. But that`s one of the dangers of posting in a forum.
Still I luv you all more than my family
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-20, 18:09
JoeYngVai's Avatar
JoeYngVai
Vaginal Warts
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: I live in a giant bucket.
Posts: 2,289
I think we all feel that way
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2009-08-20, 18:12
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,542
haha ok. I think thats slightly sarcastic
__________________
I dont have any funny quotes

NEGROGENESIS


 
Old 2009-08-20, 18:40
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Ger., North
Posts: 2,593
There should be something like the MT gangbang or bukkake party...
I`ll print T-Shirts! Like "Wank `till you drop" lulz or "OMG TAKE YOUR PANTS ON YOU FUCK" ololololololol or "Noo it`s to big for mmmmmgnarglegnargle " roflcopter
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-20, 19:16
Requiem
Post-whore
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: terra firma
Posts: 6,940
But I don't wanna take my pants on.
 
Old 2009-08-20, 19:39
Dystopia's Avatar
Dystopia
Post-whore
 
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,068
You are the worst mods ever. Burn in hell.
__________________
t('~'t)
( ( ) )

Last edited by Dystopia : 2009-08-23 at 14:28.
 
Old 2009-08-20, 19:51
JoeYngVai's Avatar
JoeYngVai
Vaginal Warts
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: I live in a giant bucket.
Posts: 2,289
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2009-08-20, 20:59
TruthDevoid's Avatar
TruthDevoid
Drugged Unholy
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Philadelphia Area
Posts: 2,458
Quote:
Originally Posted by JoeYngVai


hahaha.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalThrashingMad
I don't know about you, but I deadlift because I strive to be the first human tree stump pulling machine


Quote:
Originally Posted by viewer_from_nihil
the song serial cocksucker changed my life


Quote:
Originally Posted by BassBehemoth
Are you going to snort cheap pharmaceutical drugs with your lizard as well?
 
Old 2009-08-21, 00:31
MetalThrashingMad's Avatar
MetalThrashingMad
Death to all but metal!
Forum Leader
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Highway to the Danger Zone
Posts: 6,026
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dystopia
I was gonna say, on the "Volunteer to be a Mod" thread, before it was unjustifiably closed, hey mods in the musician forums! DO YOUR FUCKING JOBS! *cough* metalthrashingmadurhereeveryday *cough* That is why I volunteered... because I would actually do the shit.

I'm still holding out for a mass deletion function for the threads. If I have a whole spare day with absolutely nothing to do maybe I'll empty out that forum...

By the way, asking to be a mod/volunteering yourself voids you from ever getting the position
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
"Ja mein little poodle, I will hang you by your nipples in my garage,
 
Old 2009-08-21, 01:09
blitz906's Avatar
blitz906
Okay.
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 4,137
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
There should be something like the MT gangbang or bukkake party...
I`ll print T-Shirts! Like "Wank `till you drop" lulz or "OMG TAKE YOUR PANTS ON YOU FUCK" ololololololol or "Noo it`s to big for mmmmmgnarglegnargle " roflcopter

Hahaha!

A MT circle jerk would be better. It would be the only circle jerk ever that had death metal as background music

Headbanging and wanking at the same time would take some practise.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one

Last edited by blitz906 : 2009-08-21 at 01:14.
 
Old 2009-08-21, 01:47
PST 88's Avatar
PST 88
Forum Daemon
Forum Leader
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Posts: 4,982
That thread was closed because we're not making you a mod and I was sick of talking about it. The situation will be put under control without us needing to make you a mod, and the fact that you kept asking after I'd assured people of that was enough to suggest I close the fucking thing. So it's closed, and any more discussion to that effect will be edited into something I find funny. Please note that I don't care if you also find it funny.

I don't know why you're complaining at MTM either. His forums seem to be fairly clean.
 
Old 2009-08-21, 01:58
JoeYngVai's Avatar
JoeYngVai
Vaginal Warts
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: I live in a giant bucket.
Posts: 2,289
Quote:
Originally Posted by blitz906
Hahaha!

A MT circle jerk would be better. It would be the only circle jerk ever that had death metal as background music

Headbanging and wanking at the same time would take some practise.


I am SO down for this.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2009-08-21, 02:09
blitz906's Avatar
blitz906
Okay.
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 4,137
Quote:
Originally Posted by JoeYngVai
I am SO down for this.

Awesome! I've already started working on my headbanging/wanking at the same time, which I have decided to call "bangking". Once I get this skill figured out, I'll post a tutorial, and maybe even post a video tutorial on YouTube
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
 
Old 2009-08-21, 03:36
JoeYngVai's Avatar
JoeYngVai
Vaginal Warts
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: I live in a giant bucket.
Posts: 2,289
you'll have to post it somewhere else, unless you can pass it as a medical procedure.

but yea how long should be all practice? it sounds a bit difficult, so I'd say we hold off any sort of gathering for a few months. I have a feeling I'll getting down pretty fast, though.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2009-08-21, 05:37
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,542
Quote:
Originally Posted by blitz906
Headbanging and wanking at the same time would take some practise.


being a drummer and actually circle-banging while blasting or double-bassing, I know its not too hard to learn however I have hardly any hair now and no band

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YHQQ9cEwgy4
__________________
I dont have any funny quotes

NEGROGENESIS



Last edited by drawn&quartered : 2009-08-21 at 05:40.
 
Old 2009-08-21, 09:03
JoeYngVai's Avatar
JoeYngVai
Vaginal Warts
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: I live in a giant bucket.
Posts: 2,289
grow ur hairs back!

we can do this...
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2009-08-21, 10:26
blitz906's Avatar
blitz906
Okay.
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 4,137
Quote:
Originally Posted by JoeYngVai
but yea how long should be all practice? it sounds a bit difficult, so I'd say we hold off any sort of gathering for a few months. I have a feeling I'll getting down pretty fast, though.

I'd say about three months so everybody can get in shape, practise etc. I'm not going to toss for the whole three months, so when we have this event, I can make the biggest mess!
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
 
Old 2009-08-21, 12:17
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Ger., North
Posts: 2,593
We need a round screen where this death-metal porn can be watched all the time! This funneh Necrophagia video where this slaughter guy dances with the dead body and jizzed on her after he finished!

Bangking is a good idea.....must try it today after Flotsam & Jetsam played tonite.
I know some songs for this jerking circle!:
Devourment - Fuck her Head Off
" " - Masturbating at the Slab
" " - Serial Cocksucker
Cannibal Corpse - Blunt Force Castration
CC - Fucked with a Knife
CC - She was Asking for it
Nile - Ithyphallic (Annoy my Phallus with the blood of the falleeeeeeeeeeeen )
Nile - Masturbating the War God

And to cum to the final!

MANOWAR - PLEASURE SLAVE
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-21, 13:04
blitz906's Avatar
blitz906
Okay.
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 4,137
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
We need a round screen where this death-metal porn can be watched all the time! This funneh Necrophagia video where this slaughter guy dances with the dead body and jizzed on her after he finished!

Bangking is a good idea.....must try it today after Flotsam & Jetsam played tonite.
I know some songs for this jerking circle!:
Devourment - Fuck her Head Off
" " - Masturbating at the Slab
" " - Serial Cocksucker
Cannibal Corpse - Blunt Force Castration
CC - Fucked with a Knife
CC - She was Asking for it
Nile - Ithyphallic (Annoy my Phallus with the blood of the falleeeeeeeeeeeen )
Nile - Masturbating the War God

And to cum to the final!

MANOWAR - PLEASURE SLAVE

Haha nice selection of songs! You did forget a few though:

Cannibal Corpse - I Cum Blood
Cannibal Corpse - Necropedophile
Cannibal Corpse - Orgasm Through Torture
Cannibal Corpse - Post Mortal Ejaculation

I hope nobody minds, but I have also invited an old friend of mine. He has been in prison for the last 10 years and I thought having him join us would be a nice way to celebrate his recent release. Keep in mind that he must comply with the conditions of his parole and must not be left unsupervised around power tools, hand tools, cutlery, flammable substances, household pets, women, and Hispanic children.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
 
Old 2009-08-21, 13:24
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Ger., North
Posts: 2,593
Quote:
Originally Posted by blitz906
Haha nice selection of songs! You did forget a few though:

Cannibal Corpse - I Cum Blood
Cannibal Corpse - Necropedophile
Cannibal Corpse - Orgasm Through Torture
Cannibal Corpse - Post Mortal Ejaculation

FUCK HOW COULD I MISS THIS

This guy`s sweet he can lay on the floor while we beat him up while wankin while bangin
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-21, 17:18
bunny's Avatar
bunny
Guardian of Lost Souls
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: deep in my own world...........(northern ireland)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blitz906
Awesome! I've already started working on my headbanging/wanking at the same time, which I have decided to call "bangking".


only if the girls can watch
__________________
"I can see why the name 'bernie' suits you....I mean you're black, smell dead and are completely inane" as he looked at me with wary eyes.

----

"Bunny is a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, inside a clump of smegma" one of the other inmates describing me.
 
Old 2009-08-22, 01:10
JoeYngVai's Avatar
JoeYngVai
Vaginal Warts
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: I live in a giant bucket.
Posts: 2,289
the girls will film it
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2009-08-22, 02:35
Chris Rezendes's Avatar
Chris Rezendes
Attorney at Bird Law
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: Alone here, with emptiness, eagles, and snow...
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Has anyone ever had almost 2 hours of GREAT sex then, later that day when you're by yourself, you rub one out anyway?
__________________
Trust in god, he'll give you shoes!
 
Old 2009-08-22, 04:55
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,542
Can't say so, but I can conclude that I'm not missing much
__________________
I dont have any funny quotes

NEGROGENESIS


 
Old 2009-08-22, 07:51
TruthDevoid's Avatar
TruthDevoid
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Philadelphia Area
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I don't see the point of fucking for 2 hours. Anything over 20 minutes is a waste of time.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalThrashingMad
I don't know about you, but I deadlift because I strive to be the first human tree stump pulling machine


Quote:
Originally Posted by viewer_from_nihil
the song serial cocksucker changed my life


Quote:
Originally Posted by BassBehemoth
Are you going to snort cheap pharmaceutical drugs with your lizard as well?
 
Old 2009-08-22, 09:26
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Ger., North
Posts: 2,593
Quote:
Originally Posted by TruthDevoid
I don't see the point of fucking for 2 hours. Anything over 20 minutes is a waste of time.


That was actually my first thought.

Quote:
Originally Posted by JoeYngVai
the girls will film it


__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-22, 14:52
Chris Rezendes's Avatar
Chris Rezendes
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: Alone here, with emptiness, eagles, and snow...
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TruthDevoid
I don't see the point of fucking for 2 hours. Anything over 20 minutes is a waste of time.


1. It maximizes your nut point by building up the tension,
2. You build up stronger, longer lasting orgasms in the woman.

Also, I was only actually INSIDE her for about an hour and a half. 20 minutes or so is playing/buildup.

I should add that I also play a mental game where I count how many orgasms I can induce in a woman (at least, how many I can FEEL her have). The game does not, however, consider the quality of the orgasms. So if I gave a woman 11 minor to moderate orgasms, I'd score more points than if I'd given her 4 huge ones. It's a flaw in the system, but until technology improves to gauge orgasm quality, a crude counting game is all I get.
__________________
Trust in god, he'll give you shoes!

Last edited by Chris Rezendes : 2009-08-22 at 14:54.
 
Old 2009-08-22, 15:07
Paddy
Forum Daemon
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 3,745
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Rezendes
I should add that I also play a mental game where I count how many orgasms I can induce in a woman (at least, how many I can FEEL her have). The game does not, however, consider the quality of the orgasms. So if I gave a woman 11 minor to moderate orgasms, I'd score more points than if I'd given her 4 huge ones. It's a flaw in the system, but until technology improves to gauge orgasm quality, a crude counting game is all I get.
As long as you've got the hang of counting the orgasms without moving your lips you've got yourself quite an interesting system!

There's probably a dirty joke in there somewhere involving labia, but I can't be arsed looking for it.
 
Old 2009-08-22, 15:18
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Ger., North
Posts: 2,593
Hahaha I MUST try that!:
*bumpbump*
+Ahhh+
-"OK one go on go on"
+Oh my goshhhhhh+
-"Fuck yeah two come on"
+Jesussss ahhhhhh oooaaaaa+
-"Three fuck yeah you sl00d" *hit*
and so on

For real 2h is a very long time...I`m not sure if I`m man enough to stand that
But that proves again Chris got the biggest nuts on here
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-22, 16:21
MetalThrashingMad's Avatar
MetalThrashingMad
Death to all but metal!
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Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Highway to the Danger Zone
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Rezendes
Has anyone ever had almost 2 hours of GREAT sex then, later that day when you're by yourself, you rub one out anyway?

Goddamn, talk about whiskey dick. I'd have given up after a half hour.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
"Ja mein little poodle, I will hang you by your nipples in my garage,
 
Old 2009-08-22, 16:59
Chris Rezendes's Avatar
Chris Rezendes
Attorney at Bird Law
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: Alone here, with emptiness, eagles, and snow...
Posts: 3,567
The only reason I even asked was that it wasn't the first time I'd had sex, satifsying sex, early in a day and then later on dropped some C-butter on my computer desk anyway.

There's something about the female orgasm that is very endearing, very ego gratifying... it's amazing to me and has been from the minute I successfully caused one without any help. I remember the first time, just being astounded how different it was from a fake, porn star orgasm. For some reason, like snake hunting and cartoons, I just haven't grown out of my astonishment yet.
__________________
Trust in god, he'll give you shoes!
 
Old 2009-08-22, 17:32
Paddy
Forum Daemon
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 3,745
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Rezendes
There's something about the female orgasm that is very endearing, very ego gratifying... it's amazing to me and has been from the minute I successfully caused one without any help. I remember the first time, just being astounded how different it was from a fake, porn star orgasm. For some reason, like snake hunting and cartoons, I just haven't grown out of my astonishment yet.
There's no more beautiful sight (I imagine...). I'd rather the woman I was with to have 1 orgasm than for me to have 50. Besides everything else, the male orgasm is such an arbitrary thing; if you slide down the banister in the right way it'll trigger one. Seeing (or better still, causing) a female orgasm is like seeing one of those plants which only flowers once every 25 years in full bloom, even if said orgasms are fairly regular. It's not something one would ever tire of seeing or being a part of.

I think this goes some way towards explaining why you still feel the need to shake sticky white coconuts from the veiny love tree after proper sex. It's more like a hobby/habit than an authentic sexual act, a brief hit of easily attained euphoria to keep yourself going. Plus onanism by its very nature satisfies certain needs - psychological more than physical - which probably couldn't be achieved in someone else's company. Some people like whittling ducks out of hunks of wood, I prefer slinging my jelly like a dirty little monkey.
 
Old 2009-08-22, 18:27
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,542
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
Hahaha I MUST try that!:
*bumpbump*
+Ahhh+
-"OK one go on go on"
+Oh my goshhhhhh+
-"Fuck yeah two come on"
+Jesussss ahhhhhh oooaaaaa+
-"Three fuck yeah you sl00d" *hit*
and so on

For real 2h is a very long time...I`m not sure if I`m man enough to stand that
But that proves again Chris got the biggest nuts on here



I bet tits feel like sandbags also?
__________________
I dont have any funny quotes

NEGROGENESIS


 
Old 2009-08-22, 18:39
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Ger., North
Posts: 2,593
Quote:
Originally Posted by drawn&quartered
I bet tits feel like sandbags also?


It depends.
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-22, 19:48
TruthDevoid's Avatar
TruthDevoid
Drugged Unholy
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Philadelphia Area
Posts: 2,458
Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalThrashingMad
Goddamn, talk about whiskey dick. I'd have given up after a half hour.


Haha yeah, i'm with you on that one. Like I said, anything over 20 min is a waste of time.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalThrashingMad
I don't know about you, but I deadlift because I strive to be the first human tree stump pulling machine


Quote:
Originally Posted by viewer_from_nihil
the song serial cocksucker changed my life


Quote:
Originally Posted by BassBehemoth
Are you going to snort cheap pharmaceutical drugs with your lizard as well?
 
Old 2009-08-22, 20:55
MetalThrashingMad's Avatar
MetalThrashingMad
Death to all but metal!
Forum Leader
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Highway to the Danger Zone
Posts: 6,026
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
It depends.

He was busting your balls and it went right over your head
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
"Ja mein little poodle, I will hang you by your nipples in my garage,
 
Old 2009-08-22, 21:02
TruthDevoid's Avatar
TruthDevoid
Drugged Unholy
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Philadelphia Area
Posts: 2,458
i'd love to know what kind of tits gomli is feeling cause i definitely have yet to run into sandbag titties
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalThrashingMad
I don't know about you, but I deadlift because I strive to be the first human tree stump pulling machine


Quote:
Originally Posted by viewer_from_nihil
the song serial cocksucker changed my life


Quote:
Originally Posted by BassBehemoth
Are you going to snort cheap pharmaceutical drugs with your lizard as well?
 
Old 2009-08-22, 21:53
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,542
haha the whole thing was a joke from The 40 Year Old Virgin...funny movie. Anyway im pretty sure that this forum is mostly virgins except a few select people that have some worth. So no need to hide it, just accept it lol...I'm a virgin and I'm awesome! I'm gonna preach abstinence
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I dont have any funny quotes

NEGROGENESIS


 
Old 2009-08-22, 22:11
TruthDevoid's Avatar
TruthDevoid
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Philadelphia Area
Posts: 2,458
i don't see the point in preaching abstinence to those who can't get laid anyway haha
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalThrashingMad
I don't know about you, but I deadlift because I strive to be the first human tree stump pulling machine


Quote:
Originally Posted by viewer_from_nihil
the song serial cocksucker changed my life


Quote:
Originally Posted by BassBehemoth
Are you going to snort cheap pharmaceutical drugs with your lizard as well?
 
Old 2009-08-23, 04:14
JoeYngVai's Avatar
JoeYngVai
Vaginal Warts
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: I live in a giant bucket.
Posts: 2,289
D&Q we should fuck asap
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2009-08-23, 06:00
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,542
Quote:
Originally Posted by JoeYngVai
D&Q we should fuck asap

k baby, my place at 9 and don't forget your fursuit, I can't get hard without it
__________________
I dont have any funny quotes

NEGROGENESIS


 
Old 2009-08-23, 06:37
The Execrator's Avatar
The Execrator
Noob lud
 
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Upstate New Yaawwk
Posts: 3,499
Quote:
Originally Posted by TruthDevoid
I don't see the point of fucking for 2 hours. Anything over 20 minutes is a waste of time.

Hahaha!

I don't know man, i'd have to say anything more than an hour is a waste of time. Epic 60 minute sex > 20 minute sex for me.
__________________
9/23

Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Please excuse me for I currently have a terminal erection, and the only cure is midget-cunny.
 
Old 2009-08-23, 09:20
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Ger., North
Posts: 2,593
Quote:
Originally Posted by TruthDevoid
i'd love to know what kind of tits gomli is feeling cause i definitely have yet to run into sandbag titties


My mums of course. Other women got tits too? That`d be AWESOME!
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-23, 09:20
JoeYngVai's Avatar
JoeYngVai
Vaginal Warts
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: I live in a giant bucket.
Posts: 2,289
Quote:
Originally Posted by drawn&quartered
k baby, my place at 9 and don't forget your fursuit, I can't get hard without it


shit, I totally didn't read that tonight

can we set the same plan for tomorrow?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2009-08-23, 09:42
blitz906's Avatar
blitz906
Okay.
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: British Columbia, Canada
Posts: 4,137
Quote:
Originally Posted by JoeYngVai
the girls will film it

And who is bringing the lube?
Quote:
Originally Posted by drawn&quartered
haha the whole thing was a joke from The 40 Year Old Virgin...funny movie. Anyway im pretty sure that this forum is mostly virgins except a few select people that have some worth. So no need to hide it, just accept it lol...I'm a virgin and I'm awesome! I'm gonna preach abstinence

Anybody can get laid dude, just remember this.

__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
 
Old 2009-08-23, 09:45
TruthDevoid's Avatar
TruthDevoid
Drugged Unholy
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Philadelphia Area
Posts: 2,458
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
My mums of course. Other women got tits too? That`d be AWESOME!


hahahah. good one
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalThrashingMad
I don't know about you, but I deadlift because I strive to be the first human tree stump pulling machine


Quote:
Originally Posted by viewer_from_nihil
the song serial cocksucker changed my life


Quote:
Originally Posted by BassBehemoth
Are you going to snort cheap pharmaceutical drugs with your lizard as well?
 
Old 2009-08-23, 10:58
Soulinsane's Avatar
Soulinsane
Pirate Lawd
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Hanger 18
Posts: 6,520
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Rezendes
Has anyone ever had almost 2 hours of GREAT sex then, later that day when you're by yourself, you rub one out anyway?


Wow, so cool. I guess you're a pervert.
__________________
Authorized Mercury Magnetics tech/dealer
 
Old 2009-08-23, 14:44
Dystopia's Avatar
Dystopia
Post-whore
 
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,068
Whoever started the rumor about giving yourself a jackjob BEFORE sex is full of shit!
__________________
t('~'t)
( ( ) )
 
Old 2009-08-23, 14:55
MetalThrashingMad's Avatar
MetalThrashingMad
Death to all but metal!
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Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Highway to the Danger Zone
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Why's that?
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
"Ja mein little poodle, I will hang you by your nipples in my garage,
 
Old 2009-08-23, 15:02
Dystopia's Avatar
Dystopia
Post-whore
 
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 1,068
It makes no sense. Does it work? I never tried it actually because I didn't want to fuck up my chances of getting laid by not being able to get up after I got off.
__________________
t('~'t)
( ( ) )
 
Old 2009-08-23, 15:12
MetalThrashingMad's Avatar
MetalThrashingMad
Death to all but metal!
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Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Highway to the Danger Zone
Posts: 6,026
The whole point with the wank thing is most people that don't get laid on a regular basis couldn't hold off for 10 minutes if they had to. You don't want to look like a rabbit when you're fucking do you? If you get laid on a regular basis it's a moot point though.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
"Ja mein little poodle, I will hang you by your nipples in my garage,
 
Old 2009-08-23, 15:17
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First time I got laid I lasted... well I forgot but the second or third time I got laid I lasted 45 minutes.

I call that story: Night of the bloodgasm
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Old 2009-08-23, 16:00
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nobody cares about how much you guys exaggerate how long you last in bed. The fact of the matter is that in psych class, we learned the average male lasts 2-3 min. Unless metaltabs gives you some super-human sex-god power, or unless youre just gay and pussy doesn't excite you, lasting for hours sounds so absurd. Everybody knows that if you fuck for a soild 10 minutes, that's a damn good session (unless your drunk or on opiates) and most girls don't want to go much over that cause their pussy gets sore after a while. If you can't make a girl cum in about ten min, then it ain't gonna happen. I crack up when i hear guys saying it takes an hour to bust a nut. If that's the case, you're doing something wrong or pussy doesn't turn you on. Period.
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the song serial cocksucker changed my life


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Are you going to snort cheap pharmaceutical drugs with your lizard as well?
 
Old 2009-08-23, 16:11
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drawn&quartered
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TruthDevoid
nobody cares about how much you guys exaggerate how long you last in bed. The fact of the matter is that in psych class, we learned the average male lasts 2-3 min. Unless metaltabs gives you some super-human sex-god power, or unless youre just gay and pussy doesn't excite you, lasting for hours sounds so absurd. Everybody knows that if you fuck for a soild 10 minutes, that's a damn good session (unless your drunk or on opiates) and most girls don't want to go much over that cause their pussy gets sore after a while. If you can't make a girl cum in about ten min, then it ain't gonna happen. I crack up when i hear guys saying it takes an hour to bust a nut. If that's the case, you're doing something wrong or pussy doesn't turn you on. Period.


maybe they are fucking fat chicks. I could imagine why it would last so long
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Old 2009-08-23, 16:15
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haha yeah but when youre fucking fat chicks is when you DON't want it to last long. You wanna be in and out of there
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalThrashingMad
I don't know about you, but I deadlift because I strive to be the first human tree stump pulling machine


Quote:
Originally Posted by viewer_from_nihil
the song serial cocksucker changed my life


Quote:
Originally Posted by BassBehemoth
Are you going to snort cheap pharmaceutical drugs with your lizard as well?
 
Old 2009-08-23, 17:19
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A lot of things can contribute to you lasting a long-ass time, on occasion. If it always takes you about an hour then there's a good chance you just need to find some fat boy's asshole and stick your dick in there. Stagger Lee would approve, at least in Nick Cave's version.

In my experience, though, how attractive you find the girl doesn't have too much to do with how quickly you cum. The hottest girl I ever hooked up with was on some serious anti-seizure meds, and as a consequence couldn't cum at all and could only get slightly wet. That was ... rough. Less extreme is the case of the hot girl who just lies there like a dead fish, or the completely inept blowjob from the smoking hot girl. How hot she looks is only a part of the equation.
 
Old 2009-08-23, 17:23
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Wait I remember some kind of picture:


That`s it
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C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2009-08-23, 19:27
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
Wait I remember some kind of picture:


That`s it

LMAO...

I specifically remember MAKING AN EFFORT to last a while, like goin' slow and speeding up, speed up towards an orgasm and slow down to make it last longer. I wasn't an expert, but I had this theory maybe I could impress the chick and that would allow me to get more action in the long run.
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Old 2009-08-23, 19:39
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That theory isn't anything new, but that's the smartest comment I've seen on the whole page! lol And I've conducted a 30 plus year study of sex. No details. A lady doesn't tell her secrets, but let's just say there's bad times, good times, and whoo-baby-let's-do-it-again times. My husband used to ask me if I was trying to kill him when we first got married the first time, but I never knew him to refuse. Since then I've added other hobbies so he got a break the second time around.
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-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2009-08-23, 22:14
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drawn&quartered
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I wish I was a woman, it would be so damn easy to get some

pretty much just not be fat and wear short shorts
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Old 2009-08-23, 23:19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by drawn&quartered
I wish I was a woman

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
"Ja mein little poodle, I will hang you by your nipples in my garage,
 
Old 2009-08-23, 23:39
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drawn&quartered
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MetalThrashingMad

ah don't worry its a bit of a joke. I still think it would be easier overall.
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