Ok, I flamed OpethFan in his Computer Help thread... and lo and behold... here I am asking for help about my computer.

Well, my computer's been well and truly fucked for ages. Virsues, the whole deal, its never been the same since. Wont get into the extent of it.

So I was downloading on Soulseek and my computer crashes (get a very familiar blue screen with error message)... Come in the morning, reboot and... sound totally fucked up?

All the sound devices in volume control were muted, and some were at half level etc.

So I enable everything... and now there's a lot of audio missing...

I dunno exactly what channel, but basically there's no depth in the audio.. Theres fill and tid bits from songs missing, basically it sounds completely in mono, with no bass from my woofer whatsoever.

Ive gone through all the options, help topics didnt do shit.... What the fuck happened? Ive had it up to here /^ with my fucking gay computer that can't do shit.

Anyone know?

Dude i've had this same problem.

I don't know i just restarted it and it had changed all my displays and all this crap. Deleted shit etc.

Turned it off for a while and turned it back on and it was fine.

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uninstall and then reinstall your sound card drivers. check your speakers as well.

I would. But I have a Plug and Play Soundblaster. I'm gonna do what Robbie Filth suggested. Hopefully the problem fixes itself. Its really pissing me off now. It's basically one channel, mono, through both speakers. It's kinda like a good black metal concert.

Take off all your files and wipe the thing you softcock.

Burn in computer hell for flaming Opethfan!!

No seriously, maybe it will fix itself. If not, uninstall and reinstall your audio device drivers. That surely will fix the problem.

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This happened to me with my old computer...I think it was definitely virus induced...but it actually fucked my soundcard and not just the drivers.

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re install your sound card drivers and run creative diagnostics if you have it since you mentioned soundbaster.

Fuck.

There are no drivers. It's plug and play, the card came with no discs, you just fucking plug it in.

Fuck. I think it's time to get a new computer.

Fuck.

Just wipe the thing and reinstall windows.

move all your shit then reboot OS. download spybot and get some virus protection. i need to do this soon myself, my free trial on virus protection went up like 4 months ago, im just waiting for it to be eaten.


i got some weird shit adbot thing that causes my window to scroll when i click the mouse usually in the direction of ads, the motherfuckers who design that shit suck

There are 2 ways to fix ALL problems with windows.

The first way is an axe.
The second is to install Linux.

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Just kidding.

Don't get a new box until you've tried a complete reformat. Windows machines notoriously self-fuck, especially with conflicting registry bullshit, viruses that seem to be the silicon equivalent of rabies and plain old shitty terrible coding. You can often circumvent all this silliness by nuking all your data and starting again.

I have developed a simple protocol for buying new PCs, extensively influenced by many nerd friends and acquaintances, and also by my many new PCs. I break things a lot.

a) Always have (and use) two or three major spyware programs. Spyware is proof that Satan exists and wants the internet to die.
b) Ghost image your hard drive IMMEDIATELY after your initial setup.
c) Have your hard drive partitioned, install onto one drive and store/install EVERYTHING ELSE on the other one.
d) Always, always have all your important data backed up to hardcopy. If you do research or write, back it up NINETY FIVE MILLION times. Do not ever trust a computer to ever do anything ever.
e) Norton fucks pigs for its lunch money. Get AVG Free and Panda. Both available for nothing on the lovely lovely internet where all good things are stolen but you should buy them anyway because theft is bad... Metaltabs.com and FBS do not encourage theft and do not support theft.
f) If you can use something that isn't Windows, use it.

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thats some pretty good shit i might reccomend also getting firewall and if u use wireless connections get mother fucking encryption

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FBS. Good tips. But I dunno, I think my computer is fucked past the point of repair.

I have downloaded windows defender beta. I know it's good. But I don't have Service Pack 2. I would get it but I can't even visit the microsoft website anymore. I would download the 272mb version, as I got windows update, it was supposed to give me SP2 but it didnt. Can't Get Windows Media Player either.

Can't download from P2P programs, computer crashes, and goes to dreaded blue screen, saying "IRCQ_NOT_LESS_OR_EQUAL" holy fuck it pisses me off.

And Yes FBS, I've reformatted everything and reinstalled windows more times than seems rational. So many in fact, that i had to call up and get a new CD key cause they thought I was rorting the system.

So I was ok with all that as long as I had basic net, and sound... now my sounds fucked..Fuck!

I have no idea what to fucking do. I've called a repairman twice and he got $100 for nothing, problem still here (although he somehow lessened it, it still crashed on p2p programs).


I have no idea what to replace. My Mainboard is about 3months old, everything is still fucked.


And you know what caused all this? A harmless click on www.serials.ws

FUCK THAT FUCKING SITE. A little MS Dos black box (of death) popped up and everyhting went instantly haywire.

Dont wisit any of those Warez, altavista sites unless you are at a net cafe... my advice to you guys.

What the fuck do I do?

That problem is something different.
You would have a USB modem I assume and it is conflictiong with the port address of someother piece of software.

THIS IS TOTALLY DIFFERNT TO VIRUS/HARD DISK/TOTALLY SCREWED PROBLEMS.

It is the result of bad software from hardware manufacturers. The best way to fix it is to download the MOST UP TO DATE DRIVERS for hardware. THIS INCLUDES YOUR PLUG AND PLAY SOUND CARD. DON'T EVER RELY ON BASIC WINDOWS DRIVERS.

I had this exact same problem 2 windows installs ago. (i.e. a couple of months). It really pissed me off because it would crash when I tried to run a sound file.
I fixed it by UPDATEING DRIVERS.

Also if you wack that phrase (IRQ NOT LESS OR EQUAL) you will get about 2 gazilillion hits of people with the same problem and ways to fix it.

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Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...

Right. You could have said that before, you know.

a) Check the functioning of your memory

b) Check/uninstall/update your drivers

If it's not that, I'll be confused.

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I've got a better idea.....get a mac.

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funny thing is i have windows and have had it since windows 95 and just updated it with each version and its never crashed

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I second this idea.

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I cant be fucked reading all the posts coz its early

But go into my computer, right click and go properties / hardware tab / device manager.

If theres anything in there with an exclamation mark in a yellow circle next to it, it means the drivers not installed or fucked. Depending what it is, you may have the driver or have to google search and download one.

Do the obvious, defrag, spybot, virus scan.

If its REALLY fucked you might have to do a format, and make sure you take good care of it next time - firewall, virus scanner, spyware scanner, defrags.

I've seen heaps of computers completely fucked, i tried fixing my friends and it took 15 minutes when i clicked the start bar for it to pop up lol, no wonder all computer techs are heavy smokers

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anyone use adaware? i use that on top of windows dpyware crap and it seems to get the job done. we use all the normal windows firewall and stuff. and symantec virus stuff. anyone else use symantec

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I used to use Symantec, but fuck that.

AVG Free, at the moment anyway, the best unless you want to crack a copy of something. (Did have full 7.1 but they made an update nagging you about having a fake version.)
Windows firewall is fine to use.
I use spybot search and destroy. Also free, kicks ass.

I have never had a fucked computer from internet use. I've had viruses, fucking annoying ones too. But it really isnt hard to keep your computer from becoming un-usable.
I've used crack sites and shit before aswell, sure the odd trojan dropper tries getting in but if you have even the most basic of virus scanners it shouldnt be a problem.

I dont know how some people manage it.

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too much porn

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Na somethings fucked.

Ive installed shitloads of times and when I had NOTHING AT ALL on it would seem fine. I install net... crash bang ping bop. Driver was always ok before that trip to serials.ws... but it is definantly internet related. Is there a virus on my modem? Is that even possible? Fuck I hate computers. I dunno who to call, I don't trust scheming money fiend asains and the only decent guy who would probably fix it doesn't want to help cause my dad was a cunt to him. Fucking hell. Google it is.

Try uninstalling your virus scanner and installing a different one, or re installing it.
I think some viruses can actually do something which makes the scanner skip them. I know when i got rid of norton's and installed AVG, that it found a whole fuckload of viruses nortons couldnt.
Also empty your cookies, and your Temp files. Shit seems to like to hide in there and its not needed anyway.
I dont think modems can get viruses, if when you install internet thats when it fucks out, it will be due to internet activating the virus. You will be able to find and get rid of it, its just a lot of sifting and reading. Maybe post at a pc forum like PCworld.

If you managed to get a virus, it usually means that someone else would have too, there might be a cure out there, just keep searching. Its pretty hard when you dont know the virus name or what to look for.
If i were you just post around some pc forums.

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