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Old 2002-08-28, 23:11
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mrweijia
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FTT #9: Poo-Eaters From Outer SPace

here it is and just like all the other ones, no sexual jokes, and try to stay off of god and satans case.

you know what, i'm not even gonna start it complictaed

One day...
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Old 2002-08-28, 23:22
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...someone....
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Through me you pass into the city of woe
Through me you pass into eternal pain
Through me among the people lost for ay
Justice the founder of my fabric moved
To rear me was the task of power divine
Supremest wisdom, and primeval love
Before me things create were none, save things
Eternal, and eternal I endure
All hope abandon, ye who enter here

Against the concert of the Immortals he cannot stand alone.
 
Old 2002-08-29, 01:31
brutal.vagina
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...fell into...
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[ y u . c a n . a l l . f u c k . f f .||. i m . p e r f e c t .||. p i s s . f f .||. b e a u t i f u l .||. i m . g d ]
 
Old 2002-08-29, 04:37
atifman
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a strip joint......

(remember, no sexual jokes )
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Old 2002-08-29, 06:41
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CtHuLhU DaWn
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...and...got....
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well maybe for you ...maybe you don't know shit that's why - LRD MALPHAS
 
Old 2002-08-29, 08:14
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far_beyond_sane
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Your collective knowledge of syntax is shit.

Here we go again now, with some minor editions...

"One day a young man called Trevor got himself into a sizable amount of trouble. He was merrily skipping down the road to his gran's house listening to The Catacombs of Nephren Ka on his minidisc when he noticed a door next to the housing complex where she lived... a door he had never seen before.

Trevor, a curious lad, skipped over and pushed it with one finger. It opened with a creak, and the sound of slow, sleazy strip music was heard...

Trevor straightened... he was sure he could smell tuna in the air...

"Well," he mused "Before I visit my granny I might just pop down and see if I can grind my face into a big-hipped bitch's crotch. Nothing like light entertainment."

Trevor continued down the stairs, and at the bottom...
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far_beyond_sane - contributing to the moral decay of your children since 1982

"It was some kind of evolutionary glitch, she figured; no different than the other unreasonable side effects of consciousness and emotion, like religion and rap music."
 
Old 2002-08-29, 10:13
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memnoch
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...he fell....
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Through me you pass into the city of woe
Through me you pass into eternal pain
Through me among the people lost for ay
Justice the founder of my fabric moved
To rear me was the task of power divine
Supremest wisdom, and primeval love
Before me things create were none, save things
Eternal, and eternal I endure
All hope abandon, ye who enter here

Against the concert of the Immortals he cannot stand alone.
 
Old 2002-08-29, 10:49
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....and landed on his tail bone..
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PLAY IT FASTER! - minor threat
 
Old 2002-08-29, 13:29
AngelOfDeath
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...and cried...
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Congratulations. You have won the toilet of the year award.

'ate' - mrweijia

''They should send us a Trojan Camel...'' - Walpurgis
 
Old 2002-08-29, 14:08
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...and then...
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Old 2002-08-29, 16:24
atifman
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....a stripper picked him up and bitched at him, "you're not 18! what are you doing here?"

still crying, Trevor said, "i just wanted to grind my face into a big-hipped bitch's cunt"

then the stripper said, "oh! if you wanted it, why didn't you ask? you should've just said so before. "

So the stripper took Trevor ........and threw him out on his ass. "no minors allowed! come back when you're 18, and shave that peach fuzz mustache!".....

so then Trevor........
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Old 2002-08-29, 17:15
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got on his trusty street luge...and trundled out of the strip club..as he left the door this bloke came up to him and...
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'' I'll Smother You With A Fucking Pillow!! ''

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Originally Posted by metal=life
Hey don't talk back buddy. Give your dick size or don't post.
 
Old 2002-08-29, 18:52
AngelOfDeath
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gave him a fiver and told him to go buy a shoe. cause he'd lost one but hadnt noticed...
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Congratulations. You have won the toilet of the year award.

'ate' - mrweijia

''They should send us a Trojan Camel...'' - Walpurgis
 
Old 2002-08-29, 19:59
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but he didn't buy a new shoe, instead he went to the backdoor of the place and found a really ugly fat whore, trevor showed his fiver to her and...
 
Old 2002-08-29, 20:31
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...she punched him in the face, resulting in her blubber jiggling all over the place and hitting him even further.
"What dah fuck is dat? Yo tink i'ma worth onliee 5 fucking bucks? Fuck yo bitch!!"

She went back inside keeping the 5 dollars which she had snatched from his hand while he fell helplessly to the ground from her fat-attack. He remainded sitting on the ground for quite some time....in fact, he stayed there 17 hours.

Suddenly, out of the corner of his eye, he noticed something lurking.....moving.....approaching him. He turned around visciously, holding some dirt and a dirty condom he picked up from the alley floor in his hand for protection, shouting "GET AWAY EVIL FIEND!!! YOU SHALL NOT TAKE ME SO EASILY!!! FOR I HAVE THE WILL TO FIGHT, TO FIGHT AS LONG AND HARD AS I MUST WITH THIS FILTH AND USED CONDOM UNTIL I AM NO LONGER ABLE TO GO ON IN THIS MADNESS AND FURY THAT I SO SELDOMLY CALL RAGE" *panting for air....*when he noticed it was only......
__________________
Through me you pass into the city of woe
Through me you pass into eternal pain
Through me among the people lost for ay
Justice the founder of my fabric moved
To rear me was the task of power divine
Supremest wisdom, and primeval love
Before me things create were none, save things
Eternal, and eternal I endure
All hope abandon, ye who enter here

Against the concert of the Immortals he cannot stand alone.

Last edited by memnoch : 2002-08-29 at 20:33.
 
Old 2002-08-29, 21:49
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a used bloody tampon
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Old 2002-08-30, 00:04
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and then he wanted to masterbate
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Man, I get real sweaty after I wack my dong. Yeah, cause I headbang while I do, and I can't really "Jump" (haha ) like VanHalen in a dorm room, so I just walk back and forth....haha a couple days ago I was jumping up and down on my bed, with my pants down and my roommate came in when I wasn't looking, hahaha.


This is my band's page
http://www.myspace.com/ferocitydentontx
 
Old 2002-08-30, 03:24
atifman
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for some reason. but then he put his urges aside, and went street luging again.
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Old 2002-08-30, 04:42
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until he rammed his luge into what appeared to be a big, hairy drunk street bum. However, once he came out of shock, Trevor noticed it was, in fact not a bum but a half-yeti, whose name he for some reason assumed was walpurgis, cradling a bottle of crown royal and a rabbit. Trevor shook the bloodied victim of chronic yetiism, as well as shitty street luge driving, and the man-yeti awoke with a roar and...
 
Old 2002-08-30, 09:22
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scared the living daylights outta little Trevor, he tried to run but....
 
Old 2002-08-30, 14:19
atifman
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tripped on his street luge on the way (ain't so "trusty" now, is it?).

Trevor had to think of something before the Half-yeti......
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Old 2002-08-30, 14:34
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roars and causes an avalanche, because if he did, then...
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Old 2002-08-30, 18:44
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Def
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he would probably die... and he didn't want to die so he thought about a plan...
in a dumpster he found a banana peel and he threw it before the half yeti's huge feet and....
 
Old 2002-08-30, 18:48
AngelOfDeath
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ate cake
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Congratulations. You have won the toilet of the year award.

'ate' - mrweijia

''They should send us a Trojan Camel...'' - Walpurgis
 
Old 2002-08-31, 09:32
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Quote:
Originally posted by *Def-Fx*
he would probably die... and he didn't want to die so he thought about a plan...
in a dumpster he found a banana peel and he threw it before the half yeti's huge feet and....


*Angelofdeath: dude stop whining about shit, were trying to do a fft and your fucking ruining it*


..he slipped on it....and landed on his balls, ''ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAARRR'' the yeti was in pain, hahahaha, ive defeated the yeti trevor happily quoted, but out of nowhere, the female yeti pounded onto trevor, trevor was helpless, she was HUUUUGE, ''aw shit man im fucked''....but trevor didnt realize that..
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'' I'll Smother You With A Fucking Pillow!! ''

Quote:
Originally Posted by metal=life
Hey don't talk back buddy. Give your dick size or don't post.
 
Old 2002-08-31, 16:16
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the female yeti was reallllly pissed of because the male yeti couldn't use his dick to pound in here again cuz his balls where all black and blue from the crash he made...

the male yeti tried to get up but he couldn't, the female yeti grabbed Trevor and told him "you tiny man, you in big shit now" , Trevor tried to bite the yeti in her hand but.....
 
Old 2002-08-31, 18:48
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Her hands were covered in shit, ''ahh fuck'' trevor had shit all over his mouth, ohh now he was furious he whipped out a army knife from his cacks and started shredding up the female yeti, the yeti fainted because of losing so much blood, and she fell with a big splat and landed on her ''male friend'' of a yeti...now this was a picture! two fucked up yetis on top of each other...trevor was feeling tough...

..He was thinking too tough, he wanted to take on a 20 ft dragon with spikes coming from its head.....he thought about it for a while...and set off too look for this beast...
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'' I'll Smother You With A Fucking Pillow!! ''

Quote:
Originally Posted by metal=life
Hey don't talk back buddy. Give your dick size or don't post.
 
Old 2002-08-31, 20:01
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but instead he found the fierciest beast alive: his wife.
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Old 2002-09-01, 10:11
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Now he had to face the beasts wife..but instead he decided to..
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'' I'll Smother You With A Fucking Pillow!! ''

Quote:
Originally Posted by metal=life
Hey don't talk back buddy. Give your dick size or don't post.
 
Old 2002-09-01, 13:04
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run like hell and hope he could escape her, but...
 
Old 2002-09-01, 15:17
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he lost his legs in nam
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Old 2002-09-01, 17:53
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so he had to haul ass in his wheelchair and ...
 
Old 2002-09-01, 19:40
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the wheel on the wheel chair piveted on a rock and he was flying in the air....like a bird flying..............SPLAT..he got up as quick as he could...
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'' I'll Smother You With A Fucking Pillow!! ''

Quote:
Originally Posted by metal=life
Hey don't talk back buddy. Give your dick size or don't post.
 
Old 2002-09-01, 19:57
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only to find that he had no legs, so he fell down and started to....
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Old 2002-09-02, 18:34
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..think, ''fuck man how did i lose my fucking legs, they were there one second and they just vanished..im stumped!''..with no legs this whole poo-eating thing was gonna be hard for him...or was it?...anyway he decided to...
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'' I'll Smother You With A Fucking Pillow!! ''

Quote:
Originally Posted by metal=life
Hey don't talk back buddy. Give your dick size or don't post.
 
Old 2002-09-02, 18:52
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try and get a lift from a trucker, so he tried to walk on his hand, but he fell down once more, in the mean time the Yeti's allready got up and ran towards him, he looked back and screamed...
 
Old 2002-09-02, 19:29
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...by this time the yeti was too close, and he was still screaming...but he hadnt forgot the yetis weak-spot and gave him another blow in the balls with his trusty-walking stick that the trucker gave him! the yeti fell down unconcious, with his balls so black and blue...anyway, he tried to make his way over to the truck when the female yeti got up, ''ahhh shit'' said trevor as he reached for his...
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'' I'll Smother You With A Fucking Pillow!! ''

Quote:
Originally Posted by metal=life
Hey don't talk back buddy. Give your dick size or don't post.
 
Old 2002-09-02, 19:32
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dildo, which he gave to the female yeti. the yeti...
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Old 2002-09-02, 19:37
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..took it and started beating trevor with it, trevor was thinking ''why the hell would i give the yeti a dildo except for a sexual pleasure'' anyway the yeti kept giving trevor continous blows to the head with this ''dildo''...he was battered and bruised....the trucker that was nearby started to do something instead of watching the yeti beat the shit out of trevor with a dildo so he thought..
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'' I'll Smother You With A Fucking Pillow!! ''

Quote:
Originally Posted by metal=life
Hey don't talk back buddy. Give your dick size or don't post.
 
Old 2002-09-02, 19:43
walpurgis
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Quote:
Originally posted by tatter3d
*Angelofdeath: dude stop whining about shit, were trying to do a fft and your fucking ruining it*


This is the first time I've checked this, so pardon me for being a little behind. First of all, tatter3d, don't be a fucking asshole to other people, it won't end well for you.

Secondly, how come the giant half-yeti has to be named walpurgis? Bastards...
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Fuck Brad and everyone who looks like Brad. From the looks of this picture, I think he's jerking off too much. Keep him away from LouAnne.

I never fucked a 10, but one night I fucked five 2's.

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You really have no dignity. I would rather have sex with my fifty year old father.
 
Old 2002-09-02, 19:46
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Keep up your bullshit, and everything you post will be gone, and you as well.

Walpurgis
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'' I'll Smother You With A Fucking Pillow!! ''

Quote:
Originally Posted by metal=life
Hey don't talk back buddy. Give your dick size or don't post.

Last edited by walpurgis : 2002-09-03 at 01:23.
 
Old 2002-09-03, 01:20
atifman
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Quote:
Originally posted by tatter3d
..took it and started beating trevor with it, trevor was thinking ''why the hell would i give the yeti a dildo except for a sexual pleasure'' anyway the yeti kept giving trevor continous blows to the head with this ''dildo''...he was battered and bruised....the trucker that was nearby started to do something instead of watching the yeti beat the shit out of trevor with a dildo so he thought..


i'll use my 10 yrs. experience of........
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Old 2002-09-03, 01:49
Chad
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...Being a stunt double for Rowdy Rowdy Piper in all of those crappy movies he made and...
 
Old 2002-09-03, 02:01
atifman
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so the trucker clotheslined the yeti
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Old 2002-09-03, 02:06
Chad
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... and knocks the yeti flat on its ass, leaving it either to weak or emabarsed to fight back. As Trevor gets up and grabs the dildo, the trucker, in an ironic twist, starts...
 
Old 2002-09-03, 02:13
atifman
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he twisted that iron.........wait......oh i get it now! ( )



rams the dildo in trevor's face and breaks 2 of his teeth.
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Old 2002-09-03, 02:24
Chad
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.. Leaving Trevor all of 8 teeth in total, which he uses to fashion a crude...
 
Old 2002-09-03, 02:40
atifman
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sexy bucktoothed smile. all the ladies wanted him but he was too much of 2-timer.
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Old 2002-09-03, 02:51
Chad
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Trevor, with his feelings of rejection and yeti beatings, walked off into the sunset with his dildo and sexy buck toothed smile, along the way, tripping over a...
 
Old 2002-09-03, 04:13
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powersofterror
I am a tax on the world..
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pizza with a shit on it!
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Man, I get real sweaty after I wack my dong. Yeah, cause I headbang while I do, and I can't really "Jump" (haha ) like VanHalen in a dorm room, so I just walk back and forth....haha a couple days ago I was jumping up and down on my bed, with my pants down and my roommate came in when I wasn't looking, hahaha.


This is my band's page
http://www.myspace.com/ferocitydentontx
 
Old 2002-09-03, 09:33
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far_beyond_sane
You gamma-minus fucktards
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Wow.

Move over James Joyce.

Your collective stream of consciousness technique leave me absolutely bowelless.

These stories are like an awful sprawling literary haemorrhage. Amusing
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far_beyond_sane - contributing to the moral decay of your children since 1982

"It was some kind of evolutionary glitch, she figured; no different than the other unreasonable side effects of consciousness and emotion, like religion and rap music."

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