Hey, a friend of mine bought the book The Da Vinci Code, and he told me a little bit about it, and I found what he told me like the golden number and stuff interesting, and I was Just wondering if anyone has read this book, and if anyone has, could you tell just a little bit more than just the golden number thing, and if the book is good, because if it is I'm probably gonna buy it. Oh also if anyone has read the prequel to it, Angels & Demons, could you tell me your opinion on it too?

No. People like it because it
1. Criticizes the evil, evil, evil, evil, evil, evil, evil Church.
2. Appears to be intelligent, giving a pop history of the Knights Templar and other occult societies, plus art history.
3. Is an insipidly written mystery in which every plot development is carried by deus ex machina, allowing everybody to read without being confused or guessing the ending.

The problem is that there are thousands of better condemnations of Catholic dogma. The problem is that Foucault's Pendulum already trod this territory in as intelligent a way imaginable - not to mention well-written and perfectly human. And I suppose the final problem is that a shitty mystery is a shitty mystery and anybody who isn't blinded by the 'what if Jesus was married?' glitter would see that. What a wretched movie this will make.

Oh, and while it fell off the front page, in the future this is where we talk books: http://metaltabs.com/forum/showthread.php?t=17397

BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT! BULLSHIT! HUGE PILES OF BLOODY PUS-ENCRUSTED STOOLS EMANATING FROM THE ANUS OF A BULL!

The DaVinci Code is the biggest pile of haemorrhage-ridden fuck that ever had the misfortune of making a skidmark across a piece of paper.

It makes me so angry I cannot type in prose and have to deeply indulge in scatology.

Plot: Stupid, coarse, so utterly sensationalist that you can't even suspend your disbelief enough to vomit. Flits around like a spastic fly which eventually sputters to a heap on a pile of fresh turds.

Characters: Boring, shallow parodies of people. Dan Brown's characters are the worst part of any of his work. And considering what I think of his work, that means they're nauseatingly shit.

Historical/Theological Accuracy: Absent.

Hubris: Massive.

Fans: Middle-aged, largely female, overweight, ugly, stunningly vapid.

Conclusion: The fact that people think this book is a) well written b) true and c) 'fun to read' is a perfect microcosm of what's wrong with the watered-down pissweak miscreant excuses for humanity that currently walk the earth blasting out their little cunt-dumplings with gay abandon and grudge-fucking the homo sapiens experiment to death.

What a fucking nightmare we live in! "Fun to read"! Are you that dull? Is your mind that blunt an instrument? Do you read "My Pet Goat" or "Spot Gets A Colonic Irrigation" because they're easy and they have 'vibrant characters'? Fuck Dan Brown, and if you like this book, the face-fuck you too - you're a waste of carbon and you deserve to be shot.

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haha well i guess it seems its not a very good book then. Can you suggest a book thats better, because I'm trying to find a book to read in certain boring classes, to keep entertained?

Well, everybody is entitled to their opinion.

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With TOM HANKS! Tom Fist-Fucking Fart-Fellating Faggot-Fondling Hanks! The most po-faced gimp to ever face a 30mm lens and look profesionally confused. How appropriate.

Of course, it was always going to happen. The breathless, runaway plot will will translate so seamlessly into a breathless, runaway screenplay they may as well call it Speed 3 - With Monks!

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Illuminatus trilogy, now thats a fucking far out book. read that instead.

Calm down and crawl back into your cage you monster named far_beyond_sane. You shed new light onto the meaning of your name.

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Like Rich said, if you want to read something related in subject matter that's infinitely better, Focault's Pendulum is fantastic.

Another fun book which keeps to the "Church = Cunt" theme - The Bad Popes (by Russel Chamberlain). The Popes from about 9th to 15th centuries were the most unbelievable bastards, and reading about them is great fun. Most Catholics don't know that for more than half a millenium, their church was basically head office for much of the killing, fucking and organised crime in Italy.

(Excuse the double posting.)

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thanks for the suggestions those books sound cool, like the bad popes one, is that like about how you had to pay to get rid of your sins and what-not?

Screenplay by Akiva Goldsman, the famed author of such cinematic pearls as Batman and Robin, Lost in Space, and every recent Ron Howard movie. Between him and Ron Howard, anything that could be interesting will be cut out in favor of the least risky, most cloying whole imaginable.

I've been reading Ezra Pound lately. This is the reason he got into economics.

A good book on the same subject, as I said, is Umberto Eco's Foucault's Pendulum. Same conspiracies, similar locations, plus candomble in Brazil and an interesting take on computers, plus artistry.

Ah, Jim's book sounds good. The Renaissance popes are fun. Every one of them bastards, or nearly. Just ruthless Machiavels with funny hats.

Good suggestion! If you're looking for conspiracy related stuff, that is, Mr. Original Poster.

Also, you might enjoy The Invisibles graphic novels. Check them here.



Shuddup, clitoral cheesestick. I'm perfectly calm. I'm just shaking with rage, that's all.



Yep! They're called indulgences. They cost a fucking bomb, and were invented by Leo X to pay off his gambling and party debts.

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Never heard that one before, haha.

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haha sweet i was right, yea i just learned that history this week, and we watched a very boring movie about Matin Luther, and how he disapproved of the catholics methods, i fell asleep 20 minutes into the movie

Ditto.

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