Step right up, fuckface, because it's that time. The hammer has come down, the people have spoken and when we could understand them, we wrote down the stupid shit they had to say...

THE WINNERS:

Members:
* Most Irritating Member

Foxguitar smashed the competition in this one, with more than 10 votes. The field was well spread, though. The ever-present ever-irritating Gooch also rated well.

* Least Irritating N00b

This was close! Autumncurve wins, closely followed by sqol, closely followed by Newhellonearth. Not a whisker between the three of them, really, but it's autumncurve by a nose.

* Everyone's Favourite Little Bitch

This category was REAL EASY to add up, because there were only three people ever really in contention. Newhellonearth managed 5 votes, the ever-bitchy partially genetic defective Transient got 6, but this competition was SAVAGELY CRUSHED by the awesome power of Dissections fag-itude, who recieved more votes than anyone else in any category, a hefty 15.

No doubt about it. He's our bitch.

* Most Unreasonable Fucking Nazi Arsehole

I was upset I got 6 votes in this category (how is calling someone a gerbil-staining cumrod unreasonable?) but I was administered a hefty "closed-post-banned-member" beatdown by Chris Rezendes with a bulging sack of 14 votes. He even voted for himself.

* Best Avatar

...goes to k13m for the devil-cunt. Def's headbanging Dime and SARS dancing wookie also got up and shook it for the crowd.

* Best Signature

No clear winner. A lot of people got two votes, a lot got one. Moral of the story - get better signatures.

* The "Where Are They Now?" Award, for the most conspicuous absence.

God almighty, this was mixed! Disincarnate, Darko, Mordor, Slayme, Kylito, smotpoker, Dissection, PST, Fearfrost and Ezurate all got mentioned. I guess you all miss different people.

* Best Flaming of 2005

Another award split a few ways... The Cathy Agnus debacle picked up 3. 4 of you voted for me, just because I'm not very nice occasionally. Dicks. 5 votes for everyone's continual blasting of foxguitar for being alive. But dominating on 6 votes was the spectacular 'double your dating' implosion of Timedragon and his resultant two-month self-imposed suspension.

* Biggest Cunt

This is my favourite award, the MTabs equivalent of "Best Picture". And voting was so spread, it was fucking indecipherable! Thanks for nothing! No conclusive victor! So it's now in this thread! As a poll! Ha!

I put in all the nominees and a few more besides... GO AND DO IT PROPERLY THIS TIME! And the biggest cunt will be known and rightly rewarded for being... well... such a cunt.

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Nice job FBS...haha a very entertaining piece of MT history.


I voted Bia for the "Biggest Cunt" because she probably has..in fact..the Biggest Cunt.

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haha awsomly written fbs, when can we expect to see your greatness on the red carpets ??

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Rapture gets the biggest cunt award for me.

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I give myself an award.

Any attention...good or bad brings a smile.

Thanks friends!

Your the only girl on that list..and Dissection is post op.

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It doesn't say 'has.'

I'm not sure any of the people who are on that list qualify as 'cunts.' So I'm voting andrewc. I suggest you ammend the poll, Jim.

I know, I was just trying to be nice....man..what a fucking whore that Bia is.

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I voted Bia, not because she's an ass, but because she is.....a cunt.

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Just for that, he's back.

Aaaw, look at him go.

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i keep coming regularly.....i just dont post that often anymore

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Foxguitar here! He may have a cunt stashed away there somewhere

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Hopefully, never. This year, I was neither the biggest Nazi, nor the biggest cunt. If you're me, that is a GOOD THING. Becawz I just want wuv. You fuckstain.

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he just lifted that dancing wookie from muchosucko.com

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Somebody had it in an msn conversation, actually. I stole it from that.

[edit]

Either way, who gives a shit?

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my anus gives a shit.

I voted dissection. Fox was much more of a cunt, but he wasn't here long enough to beat dissy's prolonged faggotry.

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This is bullshit, where the fuck is my award?

*puts a gold star on your check chart*

Foxguitar no dubt..... the cunt got suspended 3 times before he was finally banned, and he was only around for like 4 months. He was a crazy post whore aswell.

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Foxy got banned? What could he have said?
You know he's now trolling the streets looking for prostitutes to kill or shooting up his work place

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i voted someone else...that someone is JitterySniper. he was a cunt and a half; talking about shitting etc...

edit: and this guy calle von dark for starting so many new threads so soon...and using those smilies...

Attached Images

calle von dark.JPG (18.5 KB, 52 views)

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i voted Dissection, but i forgot about Snipper! he was, as you said, a cunt and a half...

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me too

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What is the point in voting for someone who is banned?

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ehh, he wasn't when everyone voted for him at that point.

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Rapture is obviously the biggest cunt on this forum.

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Well, I think anyone that doesn't have one is one so there!

And Jitterbug IS cool. He just got a bit weird on here as that. His alter ego is a pretty cool guy. fox' is cool, too. There's just some people that like to jump on others just because. I've been one of them before only it was a lot milder.

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And you gotta love him for it. What a cunt.

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exactly!

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corroded

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rapture takes the cake for me, bastard...

rapture is a cunt. and no i dont love him for it.

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Foxguitar gets my vote, the bulbous little cunt.

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Haven't I offered you the chance to fly down here and talk shit to me? Yes. So shut it until you kick my ass in person.

and its pre-op, jeez.

I'm in third. Go figure.

post-op is a word, being after the operation (military) not sure what the fuck he ment by it though

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Didn't realize i was the biggest cunt around here. Sure, fox has more votes than me, but i dont count him because he had the intelligence quotient of my big toe.

Definatley that Jittery Sniper guy.

Genital surgery...

lol oh Dissection I'm just joking around...and you think I have the money to fly to your house? I don't even have money to feed myself!

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What a bunch of dumbasses.

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I'm torn between many of these people. I'm going to have to think real hard about this one.

I think its funny how no one dares to vote for FBS

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FBS, you are the biggest cunt. I mean that in the nicest way possible though .

I didnt think being a cunt was negative on a metal site.

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It's been nice knowing you Opethfan

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I want to vote FearFrost the biggest cunt because of his moms big cunt and he has the genetics of the biggest cunt therefore winning the crown.

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Its not. You should call him it 6 more times just to make sure he knows that too.

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(I know where you live)

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1. FBS is a cunt.

2. FBS is a cunt.

3. FBS is a cunt.

4. FBS is a cunt.

5. FBS is a cunt.

6. FBS is a cunt.



I was suprised myself why all of you moosedickers did'nt give FBS a few votes. Cunts.

I was thinking about my livelihood at MT.

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............

Take that Jim, ya bastard

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(snickers)

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Ummmm...

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ha ha ha. I knew def's frappur thing had less than honest reasons!

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FBS is the biggest cunt of course!
He closed a thread I made once,I was hurt

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Haha



I don't know who to vote for cuz i don't really know all of the candidates to vote which one is most of a cunt.

Okay, woman's right to change her mind. I voted for PST because he voted me most annoying. It's only fair. Since he's a mod at the lyric forum now and wally already voted for FBS I thought I'd split the family up. It was a close call. But I think they both make this place lively sometimes as do all the mods.

And while I'm making my final post before I get shit-canned -- if fox' gets the most votes does he get reinstated?

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I voted you most annoying because I find you extremely annoying, not as an invitation to call me a cunt. But thanks; I was worried I wouldn't get enough votes to put in a respectable showing when I first saw my name among the choices. If I get two or three more I'll be able to sleep easier.

If foxguitar gets the most votes he gets a special plaque commemorating his victory and a gold-plated watch (he'll probably like the plaque more), not the right to come back on the site. He broke the rules, and was an extremely belligerent macho stumpdick cunt, so you'll have to keep in touch with him elsewhere if you want to do so.

I do so that's okay with me.

And I'm glad I helped your respectable image by voting for you even though I dislike that "c" word and would never call someone that.

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Well, that puts you squarely in the majority.

I wish Plato was still alive, he'd show you what love truly is...



Well golly gosh gee shucks and other suitable toothless Midwest exclaimations...

Your question: If we decide that someone who acted the biggest cunt ever, and got removed for said behaviour, is in fact the definitively biggest cunt ever, should we allow him back?

Answer: No. Fucking. Way. You. Cross-Eyed. Grawl.

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She thinks he wasn't that bad, Jim. She made an honest, heartfelt internet connection with that supposed NYC cop who's so thin-skinned he had to devote a significant portion of his time making the people who'd made fun of him over the internet pay. Why shouldn't he be allowed to come back? I mean, aside from his being a massive tool who made a megalomaniacal alter-ego in order to vent his spleen sufficiently against the harsh and unjust world of a forum of a site for guitar tabs. And aside from his being, more or less definitively, the biggest cunt of this past year, beating both the perennially unpopular Bia and the surprisingly under-represented andrewc in popular opinion of cuntitude. If you took that aspect of his personality away, he'd be just fine. He'd never have been banned to begin with.

And shit-can the Midwest moral superiority, Bobbi. Your vote is the same thing as calling me a cunt, so you just did what you'd 'never' do. If you want to say 'I'd never do such-and-such,' don't say it immediately after having done such-and-such. It looks dishonest.

Well, remove my vote then. Should there be another vote for biggest asshole with the most creative use of language I'll be sure to vote for either fbs or pst unless you guys are surpassed.

As far as fox' goes it doesn't matter whether he's a she, 12 or 80, a cop or a convict, of all the posts I read I never saw him being any more of a dick than a lot of other people on here. I've seen it happen with other people, too, not just him.

And I do want my vote removed.

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He was worse than that bad. The guy was the biggest fucking cretin in living memory. If he was a middle-aged policeman, I'm a lesser spotted lemur. Policemen can:

1) Spell
2) Understand RULES - forum rules, grammatical rules, FBS rules
3) Utilise politeness in stressful situations

In fact, internet troll is such a LONG FUCKING WAY from middle-aged policeman it's impossible to contemplate them being the same person without some kind of powerful dissociative disorder being involved, or regular doses of shatteringly strong drugs.



edit:
Hang on, why the FUCK did I vote for Timedragon??? That's one heavy Alzheimers moment right there.

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Senility maybe?

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That's him, fuck it. His vocabulary is better, although it kills me to admit it. Goddamn English major.

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Word. Galloping, Charge-of-the-Light-Brigade-grade senility. I LIKE Timedragon, he doubled my dating. I must have got the flame of the year thing confused.

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That could be. I'd love to stay and chat. This has been so delightful. But it's Saturday night and the Britcoms are on. I don't want to miss Mrs. Bucket. So goodnight.

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I hate Keeping Up Appearances.

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FBS...I've never quoted someone in my signature...but if anyone mentions "double your dating" I crack.

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You must be unfamiliar with NYC cops, Jim. They don't necessarily understand rules, or know how to spell or be polite. I could fill up a lot of page space with anecdotes to this point, but the real point is that I don't have much trouble believing foxguitar was a cop.

My vocabulary's been fluctuating lately. There are a lot of words I've forgotten the meaning of, and a lot of meanings I've forgotten the words to. But it's okay, we can both be assholes with language.

And yeah, fg was noticeably worse than most of these idiots. He was obsessive - kinda like andrewc and Dissection both got over Bia, but in his case with everyone, over every response. He was petty, childish, and humorless. Everybody else is playfully mean - he acted like a petulant brat incapable of coping with the cruel fact that people disagreed with him and didn't give him the level of respect he wanted for himself, the level he afforded to nobody during his time here. He didn't get banned because he was no worse than everybody else - he got banned because he was a Cat 9 cunt with a foaming mouth. Also the death to non believers name. I think that had something to do with it.

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That really cracked me up too Keep it in your sig for another year, and you will definitly win next years "best sig".

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lol, I'm not too concerned about a MT award from a year from now..I'll probably be in the "where are they now" category as aliens will abduct and probe me, with no hesitation from myself.

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Promise?

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Well, unless Rapture or Dissection can muscle up another half-dozen votes (which is extremely unlikely), it's official:

Foxguitar is (was) the Biggest Cunt of 2005.

It's just too bad he's not here to recieve his award, which consists of me calling him a cunt.

Oh well.

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hahaha..what an honour...oh FBS, you are chock full of quotable offences.

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