According to Yahoo news, the Pope is said to be dead by some, yet not confirmed by the Vatican.

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Pope reportedly dead
News agencies report Pope has died; no Vatican confirmation
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Everybody, sing along! Ding, Dong, the Pope is dead...

If this is true than it's very ironic because powers, kylito, and I were talking about the pope in the Mitch Hedburg thread.

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Maybe God read my comment about sustaining the pope indefinitely on life support and ended his miserable existence before they could hook more tubes in his ass.

I heard about that too.

APRIL FOOLS

Haha, I didn't know the Vatican had a sense of of humour!

I hope somebody has informed Nuclear Assault of the good news.

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im going to italy in the week of april 16- the next weekend. its going to be chaos there

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The news just said he was alive.

Can the man not just make up his mind?

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Supreme court judges, where are you now??? Order that the breathing/feeding tubes be removed. And that silly hat of his, while you're there.

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i made a bet last night that he would make it past 10 pm EST

i rule

hes gonna hold in al thorugh today EST

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he has been read his last rights, so he might as well be

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i really don't care about the pope that much but what the media are doing is disgusting. they are giving periodical live reports on someone dying.

i see that as a complete lack of respect for a man's life, no matter who that person is.

it's like, "the pope is losing his senses...", five minutes later "the pope is still losing his senses..." and another five minutes later "sources confirm, the man is fuckin losing his senses..."

seriously, let the man die in peace.

Just a safeguard.

CNN is inundated with that silly hat wearing mofo this morning. This is worse than OJ.

BTW, Does the Pope shit in the woods? I can never seem to get a straight answer on that and CNN hasn't brought it up for some reason.

the vatican is probably preparing to do conclave, that'll dominate the news for a while, this pope is probably as liberal as they are gonna get so the next guy is gonna be fire and brimstone all the way

the only thing i find interesting about the vatican is thier archives, i really hope they make these public at some point, allow the scientific community,archeologist get a look at this catalogue of history of the church and medieval europe, one wonders why the largest real estate business in the world is so secretive about it in the first place

You've been reading "Angels and Demons" by Dan Brown, haven't you?

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hehe a friend of me said "I guess it's a bad April fool"
I answered "I don't think so ..."

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yeah, ive read it, that guy is not accurate at all so i hear, he's pissing off alot of historians and catholics nowadays and i constantly come across little tidbits of academic hatred going his way, his accessment of the conclave is good tho, and the knowledge of the vatican was also good, ive read about conclave and the swiss guard and the archives before,the whole hassassin/illuminatus part was junk, robert anton wilson would wreck that guy on illumintaus conspiracy theory. that novel was very interesting in substance so i dont knock it too harshly, but the plot was tom clancy supermarket trash at best, i will probably check out the movie davinci code when it hits the dollar theatres in my area tho

What does the pope actually DO?
Anyone can read written text and recite rules/regs.

Does he like ever rake leaves at the Vatican.....or fix leaky faucets?
Can he make a pot of Stew for 100's?

Please tell me that "hotline" to the almighty isnt his ONLY talent.....I mean David Koresh claimed that lie too.......Lmao

Yep. It's been confirmed, THE POPE IS DEAD!
Who wants a drink?

oh well, may he rest in peace.

Fuck, He died few minutes ago...

Eh, I don't really care. Let them do their own thing.
Who's going to replace him though?

Ummmm...another pope perhaps?
Oh...I know....maybe he'll be replaced by a parrot.

HE DED!

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Durr!

I'm interested in who, what does his replacemnt look like?

LOL...I know...I was just messin.

Haha I know

No, but seriously how long does this replacement thing take?

i dont know who exactly the next pope is, but i heard somthing about the antichrist during the pope after jon paul 2's rule is got somthing to do with it. i bet its all got to with some big culmination of alot of shit in 2012. im not gonna worry about shit though, its all out of my hands so why stress?

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::sitting patiently for some AssClown to connect Nostrodamus and the Popes death together::

A rumor told me the gay bishop might take it. Blizzard...I'll take that drink

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all the head cardinals head down to the vatican, lock themselves up in the sistine chapel,<im not sure on this location, could be somewhere else> then they hold a secret ballot on a vote between those cardinals, the timeframe depends on all those cardinals to choose one person as pope, there is this steward guy whos kinda like a provisional pope in the meantime, it could take weeks or just one night, knowing the amount of media and attention they are probably gonna drag it out, lure the tourist in, schedule it around exclusive coverage host special events, maybe throw in a macy's style parade with 500 foot long inflatable jesuses and marys and all this shit, milk the event for all its worth, these things were notoriously rigged, so i wonder how the american media is gonna view the machiveli style, cloak and dagger, italian politics. it'll most likely end up like the coverage of reagans funeral.........im glad i dont watch tv or own cable, the successor will probably be jeb bush, cathlocs will be converted to evangelicals, the armys of satan will arrive, america will successully fight them off with interballistic missles, freedom will be on the march or something

low-tech I see that you like science - fiction
What if the new Pope will not be white? There are a lot of catholic latinos and John Paul II was the first non-italian pope ....

They're saying they're gonna pick another Italian for the next pope. And Pope John Paul II wasn't the first non-Italian pope.

Isn't 2012 supposed to be the end of the world according to the Aztecs or Mayans, or one of those MesoAmerican civilizations.

According to the news I've been watching, they expect a new pope by April 15th

Basically just a bunch of cardinals meet in a room, write their choice on a piece of paper, then they read them out loud. Its not high tech at all.


(I apologize for the triple post )

I WANNA BE THE NEXT POPE!!!!!!!!!!

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Shit, I'll vote for you. Seeing the new Pope jam with Deicide while wearing the full garb and silly hat would make my day.

cosu, my roomate just brought that fact up earlier today after my last post, alot of cardinals are latinos, and latin america seems like the most devout, overwhelmingly catholic part of the world, theres also cardinals from africa too, its possible they may choose a latino or african

i know that 2012 is when the myan calander ends. jesus was also supposed to come back for the second coming around the 2nd milenium.

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Jesus already came back, saw what shits we had turned into, and said, "fuck it".
(lord, i apologize for that. be with the pygmies.)

Shortly after saying "fuck it" he started a death metal band called Deicide because he was pissed off at his dad for letting him suffer so much. Then his dad got way pissed and granted Morbid Angel the ability to play better than Deicide so that Jesus (known as Glen to his loving fans) wouldn't be able to afford to move out of his crappy mobile home in Florida. Meanwhile Satan developed metaltabs.com so he could scout out new talent in an attempt to crush both bands into the dirt with groundbreaking ungodly riffs from hell. The death of the pope was foreseen by the prophet Chuck Shuldiner as the seventh sign of the apocalypse and will herald in this new age of metal...

You should write short stories!

And metaltabs discussion has shifted to the study of Eschatology ...

Lots of ancient civilisations and cultures pin an End-Of-World date around that time. Terence McKenna used I Ching ( Chinese system of divination ) to calculate an end-date by resolving I Ching to its most fundamental level, and surpisingly the End Date was 2012 ( and incidentally it coincides with McKenna's Zero-Point Time Theory, marking the end of the cycle between 'habit and novelty' ). And its quite startling, I suggest you take a look at it.

As for the Book Of Revelation, many scholarly opinions point towards Nero as having been the Antichrist, and even then the contents of the book can be endlessly debated. Supposedly the initiated Jewish clergy of the middle East have the only working knowledge of Revelation.

Not bad

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HAHAHA!!! Definitely! That was the best shit EVER!

The planet REALLY needs a non white Pope......it would upset and anger so many racist fakeass christians......Ahhh....PLEASE let it be!

Thanks beast. I've actually been thinking about it. I've been on vacation for almost three months now and my mind is totally clearing up in a nice zen-like fashion as my old day job stresses and concerns quickly fade away... I have some connections who write for a couple of local rags, so I might throw some shit their way. I actually received the editor's choice award from poetry.com a while back for a poem that made fun of poets. They also published my short biography which was fairly hilarious (to me) and mentions Slayer. It was printed in their lame hardbound poetry volume called "From Silver Fountains". Here it is:

"Professional Children" by Kyle Pearson

Meaningless lines from the loins of sweet boredom
Littering our libraries like butts in the streets
Asthetically challenged ladies in the profession of whoredom
Offer more than the poets I too often meet

Supporting their craft with others good cash
Emitting bad rhymes while smoking friend's hash

Run away while you can

Thinking they're wise when peers don't critique
They continue this waste as a literary geek

Run, Hide, for the sake of mankind . . . .

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*[a.] San Diego, CA [title] "Professional Children" [pers.] When I found out that my poem "Professional Children" was going to be published, I knew that the five minutes I had spent on it would not go to waste. When I'm not designing automated test fixtures for wireless video transmitters and receivers, I like to relax by playing all of Slayer's "Reign In Blood" album on my electric guitar. When I'm not doing that I like to rip on other people for the amusement of myself and my smart-ass friends. It's this attitude of careless disdain and wanton dislike that I think really shines through in my writing, and "Professional Children" is obviously no exception.

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I've been indulging in quite a bit of creative writing on this forum lately, so please feel free to critique me or slam me as well. I figure you guys are quite likely the most brutal audience in the world and won't be handing out any phony praise...

They should be the ones to talk about the end of the world. They couldn't even predict getting their shit ruined by Cortez & Co. I give more credibility to Nostradamus than I do to those guys, and that says a lot, considering that I think Nostradamus just pulled random shit out of his ass, threw it against the wall, and wrote down everything that stuck.

yeah, i recieved an editor's choice for a poem i wrote, too, actually its only part of the poem.


I STILL WANNA BE THE NEW POPE

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Finally some Pope humor!

http://www.tshirthell.com/store/pro...p?productid=468

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Blasph-ama-licious!

The leader of the biggest hypocrisy in this world's history is dead, and I don't see any reason to mourn.

Excuse me, but I'm anti-established religion. Fuck Catholicism. And I'm tired of seeing nothing but this, and that Terri Shiavo bullshit on TV. We could actually put the airtime on something worth the time:

The Death of Mitch Hedberg. One of the funniest men to ever step up to the mic. And he was fucked up when he did it.

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Amen

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More Pope Humor.....

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v...cante3ja_1_.jpg

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