http://maddox.xmission.com/

this guy is just a pure genious. nothing more.

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www.thewerd.com
sadly, they dont update it any more, but it still has some classy guides, like the "Bachelor's Guide To Eating", and "How To Pretend You Have A Girlfriend"

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I'm quite familiar with the site, and yes, it is quite good. You'd better not start new threads just to pimp a site, though. Do that shit in RTT's. This will likely get locked whenever a mod wakes up. Just remember to post shit like this in RTT's.

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Will do, im suprised i wasnt flamed like all the other random shit ive tried to post but then i get flamed and then it gets closed, but from now on i will make sure to start doin this shit in RTT's, ive never really understood what those threads were for but now i do.

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this thread isnt too bad, i think Chris is slightly over reacting, but we will find out when a mod wakes up

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lmao

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"Most people who read horoscopes also buy into other new age crap like tarot cards and self-healing.

Self healing? Self healing was perfected by Rambo in Rambo: First Blood when he stitched his arm shut after he cracked a kid's back while jumping off a cliff (and the only reason his arm split open was because he's so tough he wanted to make the bad guys think they had a chance, but yeah right.. it was like Rambo sent them all Christmas cards, but instead of cards it was murder)."

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I am sure most people here have been there, but this thread shouldn't be closed, maddox deserves his own thread.

It has nothing to do with Maddox or me overreacting. Overreacting would imply that I had scolded him (I clearly didn't, he obviously doesn't feel slighted by what I said) or that I was angry or upset, which I wasn't (nor am I now, just stating facts). I merely informed him that this type of thing goes over better in an RTT, because everything random usually goes in there.

Basically it has to do with a thread entirely devoted to promoting a website, and while the site is an excellent one, usually when people make threads like this they get closed down. I could be wrong, but I was informing him where it would be better to bring something like this up next time around.

No fuss, no muss, no worries. Just a 'heads up'.

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Remember Sane's site? It was immeasurably better than Maddox's. Ran absolute fucking circles around it. Get it? It was better.

somthing better than maddox..? i dont think its possible, you can even see on his site he clearly states he is the best, i dont think there is any other way around it.

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His reasoning behind things are closeminded and foolish. One of his reasons for not liking the Lord of the Rings is because there were no lesbians in it?! I agree though with some of his stuff, but most of it is just pathetic. Sane was MUCH better. Sane has better grammer too.

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But thats the whole point, its just so random i find it very funny, his hate mail pretty funny since he actually interacts with people, and imo i think he owns them.

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maddox=old news

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Maddox is still my favorite...uh...internet bitcher and moaner...

yeah maddox is the man. just dont go to his knock off sites. they are not funny for shit.

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maddox is pretty over-rated, but he has some good articles, and i agree with some of his arguments
sane was way better, but now his site is RIP
i've tried to convince him, but he gave some excuses. some were valid, like he doesn't own the domain anymore and he's a busy guy, but some weren't like, "i don't like programming in html"
oh well, maybe someday

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Thilo is his best knock off, and hes mediocre at best.

Alot of you seem to think Sane was the best, but I never heard of him, any articles of his or anything still around?

He had 2 sections on his site, a general rant area, and he would take a "normal" advice column, and give his own advice, like this:

Ask Jim:

March 26th



SITUATION:

My boyfriend sneaks around and watches porn. I know he does it when I'm not with him. I heard that him and his last girlfriend broke up because of this. What should I do? It bothers me that he does it when I'm not around. I don't want him to know that I know.



ADVICE:

There are different ways to see this problem and it may depend what sort of pornography he is watching as to how you might be affected.

It sounds as if you feel left out of his life because he is going behind your back.

He may be ashamed of himself or he might be protecting you. Pornography can be a harmless way of indulging in fantasy, but it can also become quite addictive * it is so easily accessed on the web.

I wonder why you do not want him to know that you know? If you have suspicions about his previous relationship ending because of this and if you do not want yours to end the same way, it would seem that you need to take action.

If you are looking for a satisfactory relationship, it would be a good idea to clear the air from the beginning.

You sound like a person who likes to get to the root of things.

Being able to talk with your boyfriend about sex and even enjoying some erotica together could be fulfilling. I don't know why we are all expected to be experts when it comes to sex. A good book that explains the intricacies and function of sex from both a male and female point of view can be excellent reading for couples and can banish some of the myths that abound on the subject.

Fear of pregnancy affects both sexual partners, but is often left to women to sort out. Talking about it with a partner is important if he is not to be left out of an important part of both of your lives.

The manual would give comprehensive information on contraception; as would both of you visiting a Family Planning Clinic.



JIM'S ADVICE:

Contrary to what you may have read on the toilet walls, men are not completely socially retarded. We throw the odd neuron the way of taking care of ourselves, and we've found out a few things over long periods of time about the female species and their particular relationship to our filth:

1) You don't like porn.

...but we do. We like it a lot. The affection we feel for our porn collection is probably how Jack the Ripper felt about his favourite knife. Or the way Margaret Thatcher felt about her hairspray. We want lots of porn. If a guy lived with a nymphomaniac, a bisexual Russian gymnast, a porn-star, a pole dancer and the Barbie twins in a house made of cocaine, he'd still find time to watch Kobe Tai's Magnum Anus.

2) You don't understand the need for porn.

...but we need it. What do you expect us to do, jerk off to the picture of you in our wallet? Sometimes, it's mechanical. We must. The Beast must be raised. It must be Fought. And it must be Beaten, Beaten Senseless. How do we achieve this masturbatory necessity? Sylvia Saint. This is why he does it when you're not around, you dense wench. Because when you're there he can put you over his knee and ravage you like a choirboy in a vicarage, and his crotchful needs can be sated.

3) If we tell you, you freak.

...and that's not only because you don't like it. It's because you do exactly the same thing you're doing here - you second-guess us. Did he tell me that because he's diseased and filthy? A pervert? Or because he's just a sleaze? Does this mean he's "not right for me"? Is it OK? Will anyone think I'm a colossal whore with a massive gaping flatbed-truck-sized vagina if they find out he watches porn? Is he trying to tell me I'm not satisfying him?

It's porn. It's not the end of the world. It's high-ridin' titties bouncing like rubber balls in a vacuum. And. That. Is. All.

Stop your incessant neurosis, mellow the fuck out and watch someone get fucked on film.

(And whatever you do, don't take the advice of the above charlatan. Every time I read an advice column they have an even more retarded monkey shitting on the keys to bang out laughable advice for the emotionally needy. It's disgusting.)

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That little bastard hasn't updated his site in soooooo long. He was supposed to do it this week but all he did was change the title of the "Chris Reaves" page. He is funny, but now he doesn't do anything.

Yes yes the first time I visited the site was about 2 years ago, it's so damn popular. I've enjoyed many of his cynicle viewpoints on life.

His site isn't intended to be objective, and most of the time it isn't. Almost all of the time it is subjective, much of it is satirical, and much of it is outlandish buffoonery. Who couldn't enjoy that? It's not like Maddox really personally believes that the reason Lord of the Rings sucked was because there were no lesbians in it, he said that because it's a stupid thing to say, it's the type of stereotypical macho male thing to say. The same goes for his complaining about the lack of zombies and killer robots in movies. The same goes for his obsession with pirates and lumberjacks, they represent the stereotypical male persona, which is something a lot of people don't seem to pick up on. Also, there really isn't anything wrong with Maddox's grammar unless you read his old articles from like '99. :-P

I wish I did have the chance to see FarBeyondSane.com, though, because I hear it was good.

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......and he has articles on why he's better at drawing than a little tottler?!

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That would fall under the outlandish buffonery category. It is also a social commentary on why people think children are cute (when they aren't) and how everything they do is cute (when it isn't), but the social commentary is secondary and rather minute in relevance to the buffoonery. It's just a big joke, basically, with slight shades of personal frustration. Very little of what he says is meant to be taken seriously.

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he just says and does what most others wouldnt, thats why he rocks, there is an actuall mothers against maddox site (i think) i emailed the supposed bitch who created and gave a huge explanation on the 1st ammendment and how she should take the giant V-Chip shoved in her ass type of thinking and go rant with your old hags somewhere else, it was quite an amazing email, ill post it up and her reply when i get one.

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We've seen it.

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I have to admit, I'm a Maddox fan. He's a stump-dicked little twerp most of the time, but the sheer arrogance of the whole enterprise amuses me no end. It's got a kind of horrible simplicity to it. Something about that horriblitude makes many, many people happy.

Stuff I write now is fundamentally different to that old stuff. More cerebral, more serious, more dire. Not any less horrible though. Currently I'm not working on very much because of my thesis (see other thread with complaining in it) but I'm playing with something deconstructing metal in general. I'm also working on a book (diet & exercise stuff, quite boring).

(Atifman, you are small, brown, annoying and small (in that order) and you know I can't program a fucking calculator. My site was a hodge-podge of badly constructed FrontPage goonery which confused me. I need one of those auto-format things that lets you do absolutely nothing except write - I have no interest in anything computer related except writing on one.)

In other news I am in fact getting another site, period. Now I have time (and will be graduating again) I'm writing again. So, be warned.

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translation: "i want a blog"

and btw, what exactly do you mean by small? 'cause there's alot of of meanings for that word

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let me tell you.. Atif isent small by any standards

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That's not what Dissection told me!

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Haha that site is pretty good. crappy children's art work is pretty good.

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Thats only cause Dissection is used to his 19 inch Dildo...

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