alone
waves crashing in rythym with my heart
the wind carries me away
away from the hell i have come to know
it reminds me of when they cared
of when happiness was real
i despise it all
it hurts to listen
i hear the laughter of the ocean
mocking my pain
destroying the serenity of the moment
the setting sun sneering at my hurt
no one cares
why am i here
the rocks would feel good
flying for a second
just to get away
where am i
i want to go away
be alive again
but i cant
im already dead
crushed by those who say they care
by the ocean
by the rocks
the wind carried me
the sun only watched

__________________

Well "moonraven" this would be great if they were lyrics for some pussy posergoth band. But if it was for a real band, then I would have to say...no. Just...no.

__________________

I Agree.

__________________

I just read "Self Salvation" and as far as I'm concerned they both have the same idea just a different way of saying it. I didn't think this was a bad piece. It seemed a little cliche at times with the sun and ocean themes, but that's because humans have used those images for everything since time began practically. I can remember thinking of flying over a cliffside because of a guy I dated in high school. Looking back now it was a stupid idea totally but I'm not the same as before either.... besides that being 30 years ago !

It had a pretty good flow to it though and had a peacefulness about it. I don't know that I'd agree that it was goth material, but something a little on the quieter side maybe with a buildup especially in the oceanic parts. I did a little rewriting and where I put the break in the piece I meant for a pause before the lyric/ verse would begin again. Let me know what you think. And BTW I love your name.


alone
waves crashing in rhythm with my heart
the wind carries me away
away from the hell i have come to know
I remember when they cared
when happiness was real
i despise it all
it hurts to listen
i hear the laughter of the ocean
destroying the serenity of the moment
the setting sun sneers at my hurt
no one cares
why am i here

the rocks would feel good
flying for a second
just to get away
from where am i
i want to go away
be alive again
but i cant
im already dead inside
crushed by those who say they care
by the ocean
by the rocks
the wind carried me
And the sun only watches now

__________________

i dont know what the fuck those first two guys's problems were, for if they listened to any good music, such as opeth, they would know that not everything has to be morbid and/or angry, such as opeth's "credence"

thank you L,B'XXX for the positive comment, but for the other two, kiss my ass

__________________

i don't like Opeth. Go listen to Pink Floyd.

__________________

I listen to Opeth. What I don't listen to is "kittie, type o negative, cradle of filth, the cure"

Bullshit bands for people who wish they were gothic.

__________________

i dont listen to music because i think im gothic, if you have to reduce yourself to labelling things, be my guest, but i listen to music for just that, THE FUCKING MUSIC

__________________

My god atleast take Pink Floyd out of your profile your giving them a bad name with those other bands in there.

__________________

but i love pink floyd

__________________

stop fighting, this looks like children fightin for who is better listening music, if someone lieks music you dont, just let it be.... no everybody has to be just the same as someone....

you dont like some groups he hears... so what? go out there and u will find pop gurls, hui-hops and many different shit... you cant tell everybody what the fuck to do.... its just different minds of different ideas with different types of musica... so? whats the bid deal.......

__________________

good saong man.........forget what them other guys said because they dont know shit and are too ignorant to accept other type lyrics

good work

__________________

"Moonraven"s been hitting the acid a little too hard.

__________________