ok, i thought that i post some lyrics i wrote...don't bash me too much and the song is almost 8 minutes, that explaines the long lyrics.

(oh, usually our vocalist does the lyrics, but on this song, he just couldn't write anything...so i finally did)

dead calm

this morning i had to awake
when the light tore lids from my eyes
once again breaking my sleep
reality drew the pictures of life

like a ghost i walked around
cold rooms so dead calm
hearing only echoes of my own steps
and the falling of rain outside


from this life to nothing i’m already there
i fail to see the difference
between my current state and being dead
the failed emotions this emptiness
from this life to nothing i’m already there


i’ve been living in a place i never knew
all seems to be familiar and somehow so strange
the exits blocked as i turn to run
your smile has faded the coming of decay


from this life to nothing i’m already there
i fail to see the difference
between my current state and being dead
i should’ve seen it coming the signs were there
from this life to nothing i’m already there


does time even pass anymore for me
the seconds tick so slow
all to do is wait for something
relention never comes


the light is fading now
i end another wasted day
maybe i should try to lay down
put myself to sleep and drift away


from this life to nothing i’m already there
there is no difference
between this current state and being dead
tired of these patterns my purpose disappeared
from this life to nothing i will end it here

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I thought it was pretty good as far as balance of thoughts . The chorus was good, too. It had a 'metalish' feel to it . The only thing I wasn't sure of was the word--relention-- so I looked it up and didn't find it ! That doesn't mean it isn't a word. It just isn't in my dictionary, but --leniency-- is. That would work should you need another word.
All in all, I really liked it. And I don't try to bash ,I try to bring out the best without changing others intentions....just for the record.

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Yeah, it looked okay to me (lyric wise). Sorry I wasn't as "helpful" here, I just couldn't say much about it that has already been said.

i like it.

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thank you! it's creative criticism i guess as for the song...i'm a "guitarist" in a starting band, who is finding it's own style...we all listen to different music (from pagan black metal to even some blues rock ). my main influence is doom-death metal (though i listen to black or death metal as well), especially katatonia, october tide, rapture and bands like that, i guess it shows in music and lyricwise as well. so this song is definetly metallic, the riffs kind of remind older katatonia ("brave murder day" and "sounds of decay" era).

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