I know the last 2 verses don't rhyme but I liked them the way they were. I wrote this today for my 'little baby boy'. In fact, I've written a few things about him here. I hope you like it. I know some of you are just as 'fond' of him as I am. (gag, cough! )

"To the Innocents"

PLEASE don't let him be in charge
Of pushing a panic button.
I know what he's like at home-
You'd have to be bad luck's gluttton.

He vacuumed up a cord
Into my brand new sweeper.
His reflexes were a bit slow-
So don't let him do it, NO !!

And once he stuck the vacuum hose
In the middle of his forehead.
He slid it 'stead of turning it off.
Had a hickie on his head.

He plays his bass way too fast.
Those strings are hard to break,
But lil Waly can do it-
Like he can cut through cake.

He thinks its great to spin the cat in a box.
He tries to teach the bird bad words.
The dog is never going to moo.
What you want from him is absurd.

Uncle Sugar's Canoe Club -
Can do without a kid
Who wants SS Minnow on his liferaft
Just like his daddy did.

Let's send him to the Iraqi's .
He'll cause such a fuss
They won't know what they're doing
And surrender their arms to us.

Drunken yeti's shouldn't be
Using nuclear devices.
I know him more than anyone
Cuz I'm the yeti's mom.

And if you go back in the archives
And reread a certain verse,
You'll see the letters down the left side read-
Drunken yeti god.

BJH

And NOBODY caught it. At least not that I know of. heehee

Blasphemy. It's all a lie!

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Bull shit !! I've got the stretch marks to prove it , Fatass !!
I love you , sweetheart.

And it is true !! Every bit of it !!

Calm down in here, if I here another thing about wally creating stretch marks, I'm deleting the thread.

If you were 3 feet 4 inches tall and had a kid that eats like a horse you'd have them, too. Geez!! My arms grew and got stretch marks from reaching. Not too mention getting the yeti out of the trees. Have you ever tried to get a drunken yeti out of a tree ? Honestly, it's not pretty.

You're a strange lady...

And you're not 3 foot 4, that's my little big brother.

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I think it sucks, sorry, it's all way to obvious.

Well, it was supposed to be. It's hard to make a metaphorical piece of this nature. And unless you know the true essence of those metaphors no one would have a clue. But I appreciate your honesty. Thank you.

But Waly does such......incredible stuff. It's amazing really. Ask him about almost putting me in the dumpster sometime.

That would take too long to type. And damn it woman, use two L's in my name.

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yes dear. I was just going by how other's spelled it so I thought that's how you did. WALLY