Hahaha your new avatar made me want to re-watch the entire series, I'm currently on Diary #3 as I type this. The man's a fucking prophet.

For those reading this who don't know what the fuck we're talking about, edumacate your damn selves:

http://www.youtube.com/user/TheRealBradNeely

Dude, Baby Cakes can actually get pretty poetic sometimes and I think his extremely distorted view on reality helps with that. Please tell me you've seen all the music videos too, right? Like Group Therapy, Cat People, Lies, etc. I think Diary #4 is my favorite, there's just so many great lines about that Sherly Moats in it and his fucking groaning at the end of the song kills me.

He puts me in such a good mood. I wish all retards did.

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AHAHAHA I just saw your new addition to your signature. Req sounds like he's in an infomercial for a fucking Bowflex or something.

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Haha fuck yeah!! I think the diary entries are the best though, and I agree that #4 is the best of the diary entries; the letter he writes to his dad pretending to be from Shirley had me in tears with laughter. "George, I wish that you'd fall into a pit full of one thousand of yourself." It's so fucking funny on its own, but the fact that it's obviously written by Baby Cakes to such an extent that it doesn't even stand up to scrutiny adds another dimension to it. Reminds me of when you try and write your own letter to a teacher, excusing yourself from P.E. or whatever:

"Dear teacher,
Please excuse Paddy from stuff because he's not well and such plus he has AIDS.

Yours,
Paddy's mum".

And the Brain Fuckler...what in the name of Christ is going on in Brad Neely's head?? I'm jealous of whatever mental problems he's suffering from.

Haha I feel kinda bad for singling out Req, because I quoted that shit for other reasons. Namely, that it's pretty much the epitome of the entire fitness thread/body-building lifestyle to me!

hahahahah wow. that makes him sound like such a tool. And knowing that he's about 130lbs at most, with the figure of anorexic scene girl, makes it even funnier.

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Oh, TD - you all sound like that in there!

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hahah yeah but this is Req we're talkin about here. He's just too much fun not to pick on at every given opportunity.

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If I ever take my political career to the next step I'm hoping the journalists find this place.

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I didn't think NAMBLA was still active.

Ha! You wish the party that has received the boon of my divine endorsement was so obscure. In fact, we're da top honcho of the government coalition. According to recent polls we might just, in a few months, officially become larger than the social democrats, largest in the country. Now go to bed and sleep well.

I'm still not sure wether NAMBLA is serious or just some truly far flung practical joke. The internet sure teaches you to mind where you put your foot.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nMupwUD8vzk

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Nooooooooo man! Just think of the things that could happen

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What's your party's stance on, oh I dunno, paedophilia? And how about illegal immigration? And what's your party's views on foreign nationalities? You know, like British, Korean, IRISH, Indian? Long story short: can I legally stare at small children in your country when I'm not wearing trousers?

NAMBLA is real, according to Wikipedia, which therefore means it's really real because Wikipedia is rarely if ever wrong:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/North_...ove_Association

And if they aren't real, then where the fuck did my campaign donations go??

Just as a hypothetical question, just something grabbed out of the blue like? Well, you know. I wish I could give you a short answer. But seeing as you're talking to someone living in a country that recently legalized beastiality (provided no coercion is involved) I'm not sure an essay would suffice to wriggle myself out of a position of acute embarrassment. Can't you ask about something else?



To Dyldo. Man, your memory is fucked up.



Yep. I'm getting a hard-on just thinking about it.

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HAHAHAHA no coercion? So, I can't buy it dinner or take it out to a movie? Sounds a little unfair to the animal, but probably not as unfair as being coated in my effervescent spunk globules. Swings and roundabouts!

That's what happens when you spend every night of your life on Rohypnol. I'm not blaming Dyldo for that though, it's my own fault. I tend to pop a handful of pills, go to the bus shelter, pull down my trousers and await the arrival of the cock fairy. If I wake up bleeding and feeling dehydrated I know I've been blessed!

Speaking of being blessed, I got a leaflet through my door today from some religious fundapsycholists telling me that my suffering is coming to an end because, and I quote, "All the evidence shows that we are nearing the end of man's tragic experiment in independence from God." It goes on to describe how our world is falling apart and our human leadership is leading us to destruction, etc yada whatever. How fucking arrogant do you have to be to consider God's greatest work (i.e. human life) to be a mistake?

It's a fuckin' hilarious read! I found the same nonsense reprinted online if you're interested:

http://community.beliefnet.com/tran...ing_soon_to_end

For a cult of life-worshipping saps they sure savour the idea of their own destruction, no? And for believers in a forgiving God who spunks infinite love into our hairs at all times they seem to take a certain sinister pleasure in informing people like me about my upcoming visit to Hell. They're sick, psychopathic, blood-hungry hypocrites. YEAH, TAKE THAT!

Haha on that website there's a pic of some guy "translating God's word". It looks like he just can't be bothered:

http://img227.imageshack.us/img227/9803/profilefa.jpg

Nonono, you sure could bring your goat out to a romantic téte-a-téte, just don't try to force it to do anything it doesn't want to do. Now. See what I meant in my earlier post? If I'm not careful my head will be harvested by a passing tomato breeder.

They're always a bit of laugh, those nutjobs. I love it even more since I could make a pretty strong case that the 20th century by no means was the most barbaric and that there's never been so much peace and stability as right now. But, I'm talking evidence, reason and logic. Whatever was I thinking?

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I support NAMBLA; The North American Marlon Brando Lookalike Association.

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Had an awesome weekend. On Friday I finally got to bang this girl I've been chasing after through hell and back for 8 years and FINALLY got to get it. Fuckin incredible feeling. Then last night I hooked up with my ex's good friend, and she turned out to be a fuckin animal in bed. So she stayed over and we just spent the night gettin fucked up and fucking. Perfect way to end the weekend.

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Man that sounds perfect! I`m feeling glad for you

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I made out with Sasha Grey on Saturday. Beat that.









Kidding. I wish, though. However, I don't think I'd ever fuck her because my ear drums would be completely blown out with her screaming like a fucking epileptic Tourette's teenager having their Temporal lobes poked at random. I can never successfully jerk off to her because I always end up laughing about the random (vocal) shit that comes out of her mouth. Also, there's nothing feminine about gagging and begging to be punched in the stomach. I'm all for unleashing the animal, but only the one that doesn't tell me I'm a cock-sucking piece of filth for not making her ass collapse.

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Keep the snowball rolling!

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Lucky bastard.

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Hahaha, hell yeah bro! there's nothing better than taking down the girl you've been digging for years... Or in some cases, taking them down again years after the first time

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Just think, only another 10 years until she's legal!

Cruisin' the maternity wards is best left to the professionals, son. I gets mines well before they turn 2 & ½, and no Baby Gap™ is worth an 8-year conquest unless they're family or you plan to put 'em in a snuff film (they gotta be old enough to sense the danger otherwise it's just a 3-minute video of a stabbing).

Hasn't ANYONE read my book of chat-up lines?? CHECK IT!

I don't know. Have you ever been with a girl like that? Just try it first, that's all I ask. It's fucking awesome. I never knew how much fun it could be to slap a bitch across the face whilst my phallus perforates her rectum until I had one encourage me to do so.

I can't WAIT to find one that can fit my cock down her throat far enough to gag. Most girls, as soon as you're a couple inches in, all you feel is fucking teeth. Shit's weak, nicca.

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Bahahahahahahahahaaaa you sir are a god

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Had that once, really, rrrreally not my thing. Maybe it was the overacting though.

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I have, and I have done that while fish-hooking the other cheek. I've even had a girl that let me gag her almost to the point of puking (probably the most unattractive thing I've encountered during sex). I've choked a bitch, too.. and while it is fun, most of it is more of a novelty for me. And like Wolf mentioned, and as with Sasha Grey, it just seems like overacting. I can't concentrate because I'm laughing so hard at the shit she comes up with, and it never ends. It'd be fun once or twice, but I'd get sick of it quick I'm sure.

I think the biggest sexual regret of my life was that I didn't take a girl up on the offer to take her virginity in her church. We were planning on doing it, and she had access to the Mass room at night but in the heat of the moment one night we just ended up fucking in my bed and GOD I HATE MYSELF. Do you know how awesome that would have been? There would have literally been blood on the altar. Ugh, that would have been the most untoppable story had I done it. However, I may have ended up topping it a few years later when I got head simultaneously from twins.

I find that the best head (and gagging, if they're into that - I'm not) you'll get is from a trained singer or from a wind instrument player as they know how to really open up their throat to let you in and use those finer muscles in the back to massage your dick into oblivion.

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I found my number 1 pet peeve; people talking to me when I'm on the phone. Seriously, wtf? It's not like the person on the phone will stop talking when the person right next to me starts to talk to me too. I had to go back up to the store. Because of someone else's mistake, some baseball tickets were printed out that should have been canceled, and I had to go back there to get the tickets refunded. And as I'm talking with the operator to get the tickets refunded, my mom (who works there, too) or someone else keeps talking to me or so close to me that I can't hear the operator, even with the phone volume turned up all the way.

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Hey guys, I think I found you one to gag! Sounds like a bitch to me!

CTL <3

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Never fish-hooked, just never wanted to. That one confuses me a little bit; a lot of girls like having rough stuff done to them, but for some reason I just can't imagine a lady asking me to pull her cheeks apart while I destroy her from behind. Not unless it's her ass cheeks, anyway, in which case she doesn't have to ask. I'd love to gag a girl to the point of almost puking provided we were in the bathroom. Bathroom sex is fun, anyway.

Standard operating procedure for me. Of course, only with girls who allow or encourage me to do so in the first place. I never just up and arm triangle or or stranglefuck someone I don't know well or have never fucked before.

I'd have to imagine she doesn't overact in real life, nigga. I'd agree that it would be somewhere between distracting and annoying if she did, though. In fact, the ridiculous overacting is one of the reasons I strongly prefer amateur porn. That and the fact that I feel like I could fuck most of the girls in amateur porn makes it feel more real to me. I mean, I've fucked a couple girls that resembled the standard porn star, but the bulk of my hitlist more strongly resemble the girl-next-door, and mostly milf-next-door types. I might actually be more strongly attracted to the gnd type than the stripper type.


You've had way more fun than I have. I never wanted anyone's maidenhead and still don't, though. I had a chance to fuck a virgin when I was 12, but... I was 12, so I pussed out. Don't regret it, either. Obviously I wasn't ready. A fair number of my friends were already active back then.

Makes sense; I'll keep that in mind.

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Hint: try those changing-rooms at public pools. Only did it twice, but the playful screaming around us added a whole lot.



Amen.
I once had this chick who did all her best to try 'n act like she wasn't a virgin anymore, but during, it was painfully fucking obvious she was. Funny fact is, she was also the one that tried the dirty-talking.

Long time ago but I can't recall cumming with her, but it'd surprise me a great deal if I had. It was mostly just a painfully comic thing to watch and endure.



When I arrived in like... 7th grade? (European system, the first grade after elementary school) I was surprised to see the same thing. Still can't get my head around it, I mean, I had still finished playing with fucking lego.



Boy oh boy what fun it would be to have TimeDragon in this topic with us right now.

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Yeah, the fish-hook thing was just me running out of ideas. I find that with girls that are just straight-away gnarly in bed bore me fast. Its like a metal album that has the loudness problem and lacks any kind of dynamics. Sounds awesome the first time, but after a few listens you realize it's lacking despite its enormous attempt not to.


Hahaha, I hope not. I've only choked two girls, both of whom asked me to.


Right with you, hombre. Amateur porn can sometimes actually resemble real sex, too, instead of just some butcher trying to tenderize a tough piece of meat for 30 minutes.


Yeah... I wouldn't do it again. Not because I didn't enjoy it or anything as the mild pain factor was kind of hot, but there's an emotional thing that happens with girls when that happens and it wasn't something I was expecting but inevitably happened, regardless of her insistence it wouldn't. I knew her well, though. I would never take some random chick's v-card, there'd have to be some connection.



You sick bastard.




That must have been a weird situation. Ahaha, I don't know what I'd do..



Damn, you guys almost started pretty early. I lost my v-card at 15. It was a bit hectic as I was nervous as hell and the girl took it like a fucking knife.



Ahahahaha. I bet he lurks. He's trying his hardest not to chime in.

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Haha, I wasn't sexually active then, I think I only started at like 17.



Haha I can't remember all of it, but for instance everytime she tried to back up cause of the pain, she tried to bite it away and said something like "you like my tight pussy?". Oh, and my God each time I tried to switch position. I should meet up with her sometime.
My God I can't imagine staying hard for longer than 5 minutes into this. Or keeping a straight face. Holy shit I really should revisit her.

Oh yeah, this was at a place called "Panddemonium Metalcafé" so that would explain her desperate "not-virgin"-profiling

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That poor girl. I'm surprised she didn't ask for your white pee all over her.

I fucking wish I had a place near me called "Pandemonium Metal Cafe"...

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Ha I entered the club of the fucked with 16 (actually right on my 16th birthday) and yeah let`s say alcohol was a factor in that game.
I hate that moment right after you had your shlongus firing his load and you notice you need some paper tissues for her. That is always some awkward shit.

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You need?? That's her problem

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Yeah, fuck that. My response is: "Jesus, look at you. Go clean up."

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It`s just normal to be nice just before you get out getting a pack of cigarettes if you know what I mean

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Not really. You clean up your dick, she can clean everything else. Her bed, her face, her hair, her tits, her stomach, her floor, her dog, and her wall. If she's lucky, that's all she'll have to clean.

I wasn't as young as my friends, it took a couple of years for the horniness to overcome the nervousness. It wasn't a particularly positive experience; I remember having a massive anxiety attack when it was over. I also didn't know the girl too well, and was nervous about the other people in the house, who were thuggish characters. Granted, a number of my friends at the time were a lot scarier than the people in that house, but I knew my friends very well and you're always vulnerable when you're caught inside the tuna trap. I also had no idea what I was doing physically (except for the cunnilingus, which came very naturally to me) and that made me extremely insecure about the whole thing. Her and I had taken a cruise with Buddha earlier in the night, so I was also massively paranoid when I left her house.

I rounded into form quite nicely with the second girl, as far as mechanics and such go. That's when sex became fun and not just an overwhelming physiological urge to be quenched.

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Or the classic, "Don't kiss me till you take a shower"

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Happy midsummer everyone! What? You don't celebrate midsummer? SUCKERS!



Fuckely fuckety fuckfuck. Alright, going defensive:
We are a small group within the largest party in the government coalition here in Sweden that's pulling in the other direction. And, I just have to mention - that latest piece of moronic crap from the EU about search engine companies being forced to store every single search for six months. (Where? Who's paying? Could you tell the difference between a VPS and a CSS-file if I gave you a manual? With diagrams?) But there are no Swedish signatures on it. It took some outraged talking-till-you're-blue-in-the-face, but after a few thousand of us spent a week telling the world exactly how boundlessly stupid it is, they retracted their support. There's still hope for the world.

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That's fucking stupid. If they someone manage to completely eliminate priacy I can guarantee media sales won't increase but maybe a minuscule. Plus, you can't stop e-thieves like myself.

If they can't stop child porn rings I doubt copyright infringers have anything to worry about. You just have to exercise caution when you download shit. Stick with Usenet/newsgroups and HTTP/FTP as much as possible, use Blocklist Manager if you're using P2P, don't download mainstream movies or albums the day they're released and resist the urge to be an uploader yourself (which includes leaving files to seed in BitTorrent for days - that's when they get ya!). In general it's the uploaders who are targeted the most, because it's just not worth the resources targeting downloaders. It's like continually mopping up the spunk at a porno theatre instead of banning the would-be wankers from entering in the first place. That's not to say you won't get fucked if they catch you downloading, it just means you're increasing your chances of being caught 100-fold if you're the source of these pirated files. So leech like you've never leeched before!

Big Brother can suck my cock, and not in the literal sense like when I was a kid.

+1

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The main problem I have with the whole piracy debate is that, ultimately, by any moral standard, the side I'm on is the wrong side.

Which is to say, while I pirate music, film, and TV on a more or less regular basis, I can't deny that doing so is stealing, and from the people I feel actually produce things of value. I mean, if somebody makes something and proffers it for money and you choose to take it without paying money, you are stealing. But I'll still do it if it's convenient.

But, ultimately, if your main argument is 'it's not wrong because it's convenient for me' you have no leg to stand on morally. Which is how I feel when I, nevertheless, steal all the shit I like but am not willing to pay for.

So I like to stay out of that whole debate.

Also I'd like to say that the title of this RTT hurts my feelings and you're all insensitive for posting in it.

I dunno, I think it's quite easy to get out of. There are several services right now on the net offering good stuff at acceptable prices and anyway, many of my favorite artists have started going down the road of making all their stuff available online and crowning it with a shining "Donate"-button. If enough of us support that sort of thing I believe we could create a new type of entertainment market, one with completely different standards for success than today's Big Corporation Business.



Yes? Your point being?

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I don't feel the same way, at last vis a vis music.

Most of the bands I'm downloading are either defunct or hopelessly underground; those that are signed are generally signed to shit deals, they make 87 cents for every CD they sell. Instead of enriching some shitty record company that I don't care about, who only serve to chew up and spit out good talent, I'm going to STEAL it. These type of bands, as I understand it (and feel free to correct me if I'm wrong), make the majority of their money off of live shows and merch sales. By purchasing a t-shirt, for example, I'm giving the band a lot more than by purchasing a CD. If I were forced to purchase overpriced CDs, there is no way I would be able to afford that t-shirt. This might not be the case for everyone, mind you, but some of these bands actually get much more money from me than they would if I weren't stealing from their record companies.

As for rich bands, that have much more lucrative contracts and make nearly half back in CD sales; fuck them, they're already rich. I really don't give a shit about them and feel no guilt stealing from them.


I don't download many movies, but almost all of those that I have downloaded I've later purchased on DVD when I can get them on the cheap. I don't have an excuse for all the porn I steal, since I never, ever, ever pay for porn. It should be noted, though, that I don't steal too much porn, since the majority of what I watch is amateur and homemade stuff.

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Well, see, that's the thing: there are all sorts of good reasons to be stealing it, but that doesn't make it any less stealing.

Bands/artists/whatever with 'donate' buttons tend to shut it down after much interaction with the market: you can't let people pay what they want as a business model. It's why the Art Institute in Chicago had to start charging a flat fee rather than a 'suggested donation;' it's why Radiohead have claimed they won't be offering any more free content; it's why any number of video game developers who've tried the 'pay what you feel' method have went on to return to the 'pay what I tell you to pay' method.

But ultimately that's beside the point, since these are responses to the overwhelming prevalence of piracy, kinda like a wimpy kid offering his lunch money up before receiving the habitual beating. And the fact that down the line a better system will (probably) eventually be forthcoming doesn't actually excuse being a thief today.

But, as I said, none of this will stop me from stealing content. I'm just trying to do so without thinking that, in so doing, I'm being morally correct.

Enforcing piracy laws is pretty much like pissing in the wind, with the small number of cases brought to book nothing more than pyrrhic victories for the copyright owner. The number of cases tried is so small that even the most comprehensive risk analysis would not deter the determined uploader/downloader.

Specifically in the case of the movie industry, I also don't think that the copyright holder is necessarily missing out on income: invariably, the downloader still isn't going to purchase the movie irrespective of whether or not they download it for free.

Music is a different case in point, because downloading in many cases is seen as a try-before-you-buy activity; the end user feels more affinity with the band (and hence guilt, if they subsequently steal from said band) than a seemingly rich and faceless production house. Morally, it's easier to steal something if we don't know who owns it, who put the hard hours into creating it, who's livelihood is threatened; we can't identify with the victim or empathise with their plight.

It all boils down to the worth assigned to the products. Consumers seem to be telling the retailers/producers, with their thirst for free donwloading, that the retailers/producers are overvaluing the worth of the products they are selling to us. I refuse to buy DVDs when they are first released, regardless of the quality therein, because I feel the price is too high for what I receive in exchange for my hard earned cash. The point in question is one of increased sales volume compensating for price reduction. The producers/retailers would argue not, given that downloading probably won't be slowed accordingly.

My own stance is that downloading music, movies, etc doesn't sit well so I don't do it. Instead, I subscribe to Napster for £5 per month to take care of 90% of my music needs, the balance being made up with purchases. Maybe the future of movies lies in a similar business model to Napster.

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And it took 245 posts for you to say that. You know we love you.

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I'm with Mansley; in between services like Napster and the loads of pretty damn good entertainment you can get free and legal, and the artists selling their stuff directly, I don't even see the point of the illegal part.
When stuff like Ross Scott's Freeman's mind and Civil protection is just floating around on the net, I'm more than good.



The emotion is making my eyes melt with a putrid ooze and drip out along with the tears.

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I had a dog whose eyes got like that once. The vet had some cream that cleared it right up.

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I purchase DVDs in a similar manner; I either way several months for the price to drop or buy used. Occasionally I get impatient and buy straight away, but the majority of the time I do it the smart way.


Seems likely.

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I paid a computer-savvy friend of mine to steal Paddy's search logs and I wish, I wish so dearly, that I could go back and unsee what I have discovered.

This is an unadulterated except covering April and May, exactly as he wrote it into the search engine, chronologizing his slow decent into madness:


how to get gurls 2 like u 2008-04-11
how to get girls 2 like you 2008-04-11
how to impress a pretty girl 2008-04-11
age of consent in ireland 2008-04-12
what is megan's law 2008-04-12
how do u initiate sex with a girl 2008-04-12
is my penis small 2008-04-12
what is the average penis size 2008-04-12
how to make ur dick bigger 2008-04-12
number for pizza hut 2008-04-14
good wines chicks like 2008-04-14
how do i tell if she likes me 2008-04-14
how young is too young? 2008-04-14
how to have sex 2008-04-14
www.youporn.com 2008-04-14
how to convince a girl to have sex with you 2008-04-15
what to do if my date wont have sex with me 2008-04-16
what is rufinol 2008-04-16
where can you buy rufinol 2008-04-16

what to do if a girl misses her period 2008-05-07
where to get a pregnancy test 2008-05-07
are abortions illegal 2008-05-09
how to perform an abortion 2008-05-09
does pushing a bitch down stairs kill the baby 2008-05-10
how to convince a chick to shove a hanger inside her 2008-05-10
how do i tell my parents shes pregnant2008-05-10
where can u buy lime 2008-05-15
how much is lime 2008-05-15
good knifes 2008-05-16
where is the juggular 2008-05-16
how to bury a body 2008-05-16
how long does pcp stay in ur system? 2008-05-16
how to cure anxiety 2008-05-20
how to help depression 2008-05-20
does jesus still love a bad sinner? 2008-05-21
news about girl from dublin disappearing 2008-05-22
news about girl from dublin disappearing 2008-05-22
news about girl from dublin disappearing 2008-05-22
suspects in young girls murder last week 2008-05-22
are there suspects for Stacy Mullen's murder? 2008-05-23
will jesus forgive a murder 2008-05-23
missing girls 2008-05-23
suicide hot line number 2008-05-25
sucide help forums 2008-05-25
suicide help forum 2008-05-25
painless ways to die 2008-05-25
bible quotes about hell 2008-05-25
google maps ireland oakridge kindergarten address 2008-05-26
how to make a ski mask 2008-05-26
how to make pipe bombs 2008-05-26
how much blood is in a child 2008-05-26
how to scare children 2008-05-26
how to break down a locked door 2008-05-26
how long does it take police to arrive at a scene 2008-05-26
biggest shootings in history 2008-05-26
how do u know if there is hope left 2008-05-26
does it hurt when you shoot yourself 2008-05-26
what the bible says about suicide 2008-05-26

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^ me likes that!

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HAHAHA! The frightening thing is, I actually have searched for quite a few of those things (highlighted!). I think it's helpful to know certain things, such as the fact that coat-hanger abortions don't actually involve contact with the foetus but are instead designed to cause haemorrhaging by using the hanger to scrape the wall of the uterus which in turns causes a miscarriage. See? Just imagine the embarrassment you'd have saved if you had known this prior to fucking your little sister with the thin metal dick of shame. Not to mention the money you'd have saved on bath towels if you hadn't trailed the little fella out of her in pieces like shredded lasagne. Google is your friend! A friend who can't keep a fucking secret, apparently.

I'm a little disappointed that my searches about vacancies in Al Qaeda's training camps didn't show up. I wasn't planning on actually going, I was just hoping that Homeland Security would intercept my searches and send me to Abu Ghraib for processing with that hawt bitch Lynndie England. Yeah baby, point at my fat balls!

Pads, its nothing any of us haven't searched for before. No worries.

Well, except for that Pizza Hut reference. What the fuck? That shit is disgusting.

Is Leonard Cohen's "Chelsea Hotel" not the perfect song ever? Not musically, because I mean to be honest, I don't like it sonically all that much, but the lyrics are fucking awesome in a "blunt" kind of way. Dax Rigg's cover, though, satisfies me on all levels.

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So, yeah, my first show ever has been canceled. Lazy cunt promoter people didn't do their job and get enough bands on the bill.

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That's a bummer, CtL, but it happens. It really sucks to be a starting band and have to deal with promoters that just don't give a fuck who or what you are, they just want their share of the ticket sales. They'll cut your set 15 minutes short if means they can squeeze another band in.

There are some good promoters, though, that put on great shows and care about the audience and the bands they're putting up and when you get to work with them its a real treat. But its just like anything else.

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I once had a promoter who booked a show with us and several other bands, who failed to notify the fucking venue that the show was going on. We all showed up to play and their was another show going on.

But hey CTL, you're one step closer to getting out there and playing. It'll happen soon enough man, good luck!

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Just came back from the doc. I`m getting fucking circumcised. Not that I`d care about that but it`s just strange

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You'll have to reconnect with the girls you've been with and tell them you have something new to show them

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Just imagine in the end they want kind of relationsship or some horror things like that. I`m fuckin 17, there`s just no place in my life for only one girl. Especially not when I`m just one week away from 6 weeks of summer vacations. That`ll be a party!

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Okay, I have to ask. Clinically speaking, why are you getting circumsized at this late time of life? Or tell me its none of my business. Either way.

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Yeah, if you don't mind me asking too: Why? If its because you can't get the foreskin back all the way and its painful then, yeah, I've heard that can suck pretty bad but, if not, how come? Chicks really don't give a shit and I hear that uncircumcised is more pleasurable.

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Did a mod log onto Dystopia's account ,and create that thread or is he really that fucking stupid?

Are you sure it isn't a mod with a fictitious name?

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fuck getting circumsized.

Any of you guys in bands ever dealt with labels?
we have a small Dallas-based indie label interested in us.

I'm not sure what to do. I usually turn down offers because it's kids who make a shitty myspace and call it a label. but these guys seem legit. I read the president of the label's credentials, and he's a bad motherfucker.

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We don't have the power to do that, unfortunately. So yes, he is that fucking retarded.

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That`s the reson why. Sounds strange but this only came from time to time. Whenever I had a girl there was no problem at all about this but suddenly there are times when I`m just not able to pull it back and it hurts and blah.
And if this isn`t enough I just noticed right after the surgery (so when I`m not allowed to have sexual intercourse, because the skin is still swollen and can probably rip apart) I have a date with the fucking hottest girl I`ve ever seen. Fuck you almighty lord FUUUUUUCK YOU

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I know a guy who had the same problem as you Gomers (no, it's not me) and his doctor just told him to gently try to roll back the skin a little more each day, and to just gradually work at it over the course of a few weeks until it loosens up. It worked for him, and he's now happily fucking everything with a pulse (I told you it wasn't me!). Human skin is pretty versatile, and you can coax it into growing if you have the patience. In fact, you can even grow your entire foreskin back using stretching methods, because stretching the skin encourages growth. You don't actually stretch the skin like chewing gum, you just tug at it and this entices your skin to regenerate and increase its mass, which in your case would create more room for your helmet to sleep in.

Maybe something here will help with your problem:

http://www.circumstitions.com/Restore.html
http://www.google.co.uk/#hl=en&sour...gle+Search&fp=1

Have you tried any of this yet? If not, do that first, it's certainly worth ruling it out before you let some mad surgeon near your meat with a cleaver. Ask your doc about it first, in case your foreskin is especially fucked and this might do more damaged haha. Whatever happens, Dr. Paddy M.D. takes no responsibility For me, circumcision would be the very last resort, and I hope your doc feels the same and isn't one of those snip-happy cunts who thinks it's generally better to have the foreskin removed no matter what the complaint may be. Ask him (or her? Let her cut it!!) every question you can think of before you go through with it.

Your penis is in my thoughts and prayers, even more so than usual

If only that were the case. We don't have access to users' passwords, and given the calibre of mod this forum has that's probably for the best!

I think the only reason Dystopia hasn't been banned outright is that he's become something of a mascot around here. We almost depend on his posts consisting of a schizophrenic's brain-ejaculate, it gives our lives some degree of consistency and predictability; we are comforted by its familiarity. Plus he's pretty good for using as the forum's punch-bag when things are getting boring or stressful, and he clearly doesn't mind that or he'd stop posting his ideas about smoking pot vicariously through a bunch of bananas or whatever the fuck.

6.) IT IS ALSO COOLER AND LOOKS MORE "EURO" TO BE INTACT AND NORMAL.
You need not feel like a freak if you visit a nude beach or frequent health clubs or youth hostels in Europe, or Asia, South America, Australia, or New Zealand.

Ahahahaha, I swear, if I didn't already know that this shit existed I'd be convinced that they were trolling. HARD.

Gomers, I've also heard about the self-pulling foreskin back thingy so maybe try it out after talking to your doc about it. And dude, delay the surgery for that date!

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Haha I never thought I'd see Europeanness (that's a word, fuck you (hmmm, sounds a bit like "you're a penis")) being put forth as a positive reason for doing something. "Keep your foreskin, and also eat garden pests for dinner and smell like a tramp's blanket through a lack of bathing." You may think I'm talking about the French here, but if I was to tell you that today I was eating frog pizza and not having a bath you'd most likely have your mind blown and your prejudices challenged. Stinky French cunts.

I've been using an extremely simple yet extremely handy website for a few months now, and I want to share it with you, my dear friends.

http://downforeveryoneorjustme.com/

If you are having trouble accessing a website and suspect it may be "down", you can use this site to check it out for you. It uses its own servers/software to try and access the site. If it can successfully access it the site isn't down, it's just your shitty system which can't access it, all clogged up with trojans from your efforts to find shaved monkey porn. If it can't access it, you'll sleep easy knowing your sweet system is as clean as a whore's kitchen.

I've officially run out of workable metaphors.

I don't like it. It tells me my site is down when it is not. Now I'm sad and will most likely go out and throw stones at little birds. Look what you've done.



I'm still not convinced of that at all.

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Tried it, hasn`t worked for me. Don`t fucking ask me why but yeah a lot of my friends I talked to about that had actually kind of the same problem (of course when they were like 5,6 years old) and it has never worked with that kind of method. The problem with my foreskin is that it has grown while my shlong stopped growing (wtf?). No I don`t have a small dick. The surgery contract is signed and I will give it to the doc on monday. Surgery will be on 15th or 16th, talk with the anaesthesiologist a day before that. Wish me luck

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Best of luck bro! Try to setup that date for before then!

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http://metaltabs.com/forum/showthread.php?t=56390



I feel bad for the person who wrote this.

Good luck. Be sure to take before and after pictures for us!

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Ahhh Natural Selection, what will you think of next?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2010_S...truck_explosion

Yes and make sure you don't throw out the foreskin when the surgery is done just in case you want to put it back on.

You could use it for a mini sling shot. Seriously, if that's what's happened it sounds like it's the reasonable thing to do.

The stuff about being freaky looking is so damn lame it's not funny.

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what is up cunts. a month seems like a long time to be away from the damn computer. I almost wanted to kill my whole annoying platoon.

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I hope they will record the surgery, that`d make me laugh I guess. Or puke


That would make a hilarious headline for the newspapers.

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Can't say that hasn't happened before.

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As I sat here waiting for a big ass file downloading my eyes were morbidly drawn to Gomli's avatar. They stayed there. They stayed there. They stayed there.


I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE

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This video makes me wish I had three kinds of cancer. Either that or one really big cancer.

Why aren't you on facebook? We could discuss Swedish politics and your cancer.

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He`s scared of being watched by the ones above the normal man.

http://www.freeworldgroup.com/games9/gameindex/coma.htm

play this it`s great

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GET TO DA CHOPPA!!!!!

http://vids.myspace.com/index.cfm?f...ideoid=41996405

I'm not entirely sure how to interpret this, but after the video I posted this one somehow restores harmony and equilibrium.

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You're sounding like a Marine! lol

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well I'm thinking about it, after 1 month we still had people that couldn't put their patrol cap on right and other stupid stuff. Army cadets are pretty jacked up.

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I'm surprised they didn't get stapled on. That's pretty ridiculous.

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God damn heat wave! This is getting ridiculous and it's going to be the same for the next few days. I've moved my computer and guitar set up to my basement where it's almost 20 degrees cooler than upstairs. Got my ice cold beer down here too. You can't fuck me anymore, Mother Nature! ...Well, until I have to go outside

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Try chainsaw work for a cooler. After a week of this shit I'm beginning to feel a certain understanding for Leatherface.

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Wrong! The heat index is predicted to be well over 100°F tomorrow which is somewhat more ridiculous than today Nice show btw sorry I couldn't get there earlier.

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Well fuck! Sounds like a perfect day to sit in my pool with floating beer cans all around me. It's all good though dude, at least you made it! I wasn't too happy with the show, it wasn't one of the better ones. I have blood stains on two of my drums and all over my one drum stick hahah. It was tough pulling off some of those fucking fills with my thumb I saw you called on the 4th but I was stuck at work all night

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Well

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I accidentally all over the front of my new jeans, is that bad?