Jesus, that's some demented stuff.

__________________

I actually get physically uneasy when I see that married newscouple. It just doesn't "connect" with my brain, I seem to reject it.


Other than that I kinda like Brule though. Girlfriend plain loves it.

__________________

Her boobs taste and feel like roast beef, who wouldn't wanna piece of that action??

The character is played so perfectly that just watching him sitting in a chair staring into space is funny. Brule's mother totally sent the tone of the show in a completely different direction haha, I love this shit.

Speaking of demented head-fuckage:

JAAAAAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 This was a one-series British sketch show created by Chris Morris (of Brass Eye fame). It started as a radio show called Blue Jam (I have it if anyone wants it) and it's just fucking disturbing, in a feverish nightmare kinda way.

Episode 1
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cOUxoiDTgwA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4zrvhEzXZ5I
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_MNOu7MJng

Episode 2
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4-8nvMZ8vo
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SOqHzaxh9B4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nLe5WXfq-yY

Episode 3
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TNA0uMJKtSc
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCP4OSWzZ6Q
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MFUyE6ZSEB0

Episode 4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qCVNkHn6s_I
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IKpFACldP6I
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kjOmqi-brQ8

Episode 5
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Es38GFuo6lA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j8jRJSXDYPs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uanEu7BYAbA

Episode 6
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YkZIVl92TcI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vjGCOtqWmHw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OPjS72yiLr4

Enjoy. I know you will.

That segment was the only time I actually laughed out loud, especially when the foreboding music queued and she says "..I used to put poison in your food to slow you down." and everything after. Its an entertaining show, but not in a gut-busting kind of way.. kind of the same way The Tim And Eric Awesome show gets me.

__________________

I added Episode 6 to my Brule post, and here it is for convenience:

Episode 6: Friendship
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CmL6vh1O8_k
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lzMcHz1VlGE

This episode is both touching and disturbing haha. And, if I'm not mistaken, half of the fitness thread participants feature in this one, too! My unwieldy erection would certainly seem to indicate as much.

EDIT:

Whoops: http://metaltabs.com/forum/showthread.php?t=38527

I could have sworn I searched before starting this thread. Actually, I did. The site mustn't accept two-letter search queries, but it doesn't tell you that; it just says "no results found". So, searching for thread titles with "TV" in them doesn't yield any results, and only one unrelated thread has been started with the word "Television" in the title. I'M LARGELY INNOCENT!

Sorry for taking over your idea, blitz. T'was done by an accident.

???

__________________

RENO 911!


Holy fuck this shit is SO right up my alley.

__________________

I don't think I've ever watched Archers or Reno 911. I'll check dems shits out.

Futurama started up again this week. The first two episodes were very promising, they're certainly funnier than those mind-numbing movies they released between series 5 and 6. Zapp Brannigan features quite heavily in the second episode, which is just fucking splendid! At last, I once again have a cartoon I can watch every week without grinding my teeth.

Series 4 of The IT Crowd started this week, too. I haven't seen the first episode yet. Any fans of this show here? The Manmeister Mansley must surely watch it. It's from the same guy who co-wrote/directed Father Ted, which is a British/Irish institution of televisual funtimes.

http://www.hulu.com/watch/127971/ar...-hunt-aka-pilot


You can follow the rest. Check it out.

__________________

I finally mustered the patience to watch a few episodes of The Wire, and I'm getting into it. Gonna watch the whole shebang over the course of the next week or so, download bandwidth permitting. I get the impression that it's trying a little too hard to fill certain "social consciousness" quotas, though.

I watched Twin Peaks a few weeks ago, I'm still not sure if I loved it or was indifferent to it, which is pretty much standard operating procedure with David Lynch's work. The Asian chick was fuckin' smokin', if nothing else. I haven't seen the movie which was made after the series ended, "Fire Walk with Me". I've heard it's shit, and I can't seem to be bothered sitting through 2 hours of it when I know agent Cooper is barely in it. That said, the dancing midget makes several appearances...

For the Brits reading this: Shooting Stars' latest series is fucking amazing. The funniest stuff Vic and Bob have ever done, and Renton Skinner (Angelos Epithemiou) not only fills Matt Lucas' boots, but he does so without being fat, bald and homosexual at the same time. HA!

Padma, I'm sure you have, but to just to check, have you watched Arrested Development? Please tell me you have. Absolutely the greatest show ever, hands down. One of the funniest things I've ever seen. I've literally watched the entire series 5 times (might be 6, can't remember).

__________________

Indeed. Word is theyre making the movie. Such an underrated show, its a shame it got cancelled...they should have just moved networks. FOX wasn't a good home for it, after all...well, they have the likes of American Idol and So You Think You Can Dance...which is targeted at USA's dropouts. Hopefully they make the movie!

__________________

It's well worth your time. There are so many characters and the dialogue is super layered that it can be a challenge to figure out all what the fuck is going on. Season 2 is really awesome but Season 4 takes the cake. Awesome show. Nothing comes close to the quality except for Deadwood or maybe Rome.

__________________

I had heard this show mentioned a few times, but I always dismissed it as some trendy wank aimed at MTV viewers with wispy beards and washed-out jeans. You recommended Breaking Bad to me, so I'll trust your judgement on this one too. I'll download a few eps and see what's what.

I've only watched the first 7 episodes of season 1 and I'm as hooked as a diabetic. The multi-layered storytelling is quite difficult to get a handle on at first, but I think I've gotten most of the characters down pretty well and I generally know what they're all doing most of the time. Some damn fine acting in this show, even from the peripheral characters.

I've never watched Deadwood, nor Rome. I've seen clips of Deadwood and didn't think it would be my cuppa tea; at this stage in my life I think I've had my fill of drunken cowboys shooting and fucking haha. I'm sure there's more to it than that, but you know what I mean.

I think House starts up again next month. If it weren't for Hugh Laurie's involvement I probably wouldn't watch it, but the guy's a fucking legend, as is his previous comedy partner Stephen Fry. I wish they'd team up again.

The Wire is pretty much what TV should be; there's nothing else that I've seen on TV that really takes advantage of the structure of a 1-hour drama (except The Singing Detective, but that doesn't count like this does).

All other TV is terrible and you're terrible for liking it.

Dear Arrested Development,



I love you.

__________________

I say that every day as I wake and every night as I prepare for slumber.

PADDY! ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT! NOW! Its only 3 seasons so it won't take you long, but you'll be pining for eternity afterward for me. Though, even now, with the amount of times I've seen every episode, I still manage to pick up things I never noticed.

__________________

Oh my God yes I've only been able to fully and obsessively watch the series since yesterday (only had seen the first handful episodes of season 1) and nearing season 1's completion now, with the whole Martha thing.




But Tobias Fünke makes my blood boil.


PADDY! ARRESTED DEVELOPMENT! NOW!


Edit: HOLY FUCK I JUST SAW YOUR EX-AVATAR

__________________

Nice! Did you notice that they changed Marthas? I envy your ability to watch the next two seasons for the first time. So much awaits! Haha, I love Tobias, as fucking retarded as he is. David Cross plays him flawlessly. Just wait until you meet Franklin is Season 3. He's the best.

Yay! I was thinking of bringing it back. I miss Buster.

__________________

What you said about The Wire before, about how it's more like a gradually unravelling novel, is so true. The shit just gets better and deeper as it goes on. I'm half-way through the second series and I'm just finding it to be an engaging and engrossing experience.

SPOILER > why the fuck did DeAngelo have to snuff it? He was good peoples! /SPOILER

I watched the first episode the other day, and it didn't tickle my monkey as I hoped it would. I'm not digging the overall style/vibe of it, although I did get an erection when the 13-year-old cousin showed up. The dirty little bitch that she is.

Yeah, well, that's just the pilot. Definitely the weakest episode of the series. Just watch a few more. Pretty please? For me?

__________________

For you? Man, I'd suck the moisture of Oprah Winfrey's gravy-stained thong for you. Another few hits of Arrested Development will be a cakewalk. I'll watch another 3 episodes, so that'll be 4 in total, which should be plenty if I'm to give the show a chance of drawing me in. They'd best be awesome, ya CUNT.

Guess I should list the channels I like rather then all the shows I watch to shorten my typing. :P

IFC
Current
G4
Comedy Central
Cartoon Network
TBS
ABC
FX
MTV2(Rob and Big/ Fantasy Factory, Jackass)
FUSE
Disc
animal planet
science ch
travel ch
more that I can't think of off the top of my head

You watch a lot of shit.

__________________

Seems like it ,but I watch less than 2 hours of television a day. 12 hours a day goes to work and 6-8 to sleep. Everything else is for wanking and lifting.

Or do you mean I literally watch "a lot of shit"?

I finished watching all the episodes of Arrested Development yesterday. It was a pretty damn good series in my opinion, I'm sad that there will not be any more episodes.

__________________

I think RuPaul's Drag Race is the most entertaining show on TV since Rock of Love. And yes I do love my trash television.

JER-RY! JER-RY! JER-RY!

I mean both. And I find it hard to believe that you can keep up with at least one show from each of those channels with only 2 hours of TV a day, which, in my opinion, is still a lot.

I feel your pain, but don't forget, they're making a movie! Still is post-production, but last I heard they're about done with the script.


The title of that show really frightens me.

__________________

That is great news indeed. I'm just wondering if they can make the movie be as awesome as the series. Some of those sub-plots involved took place over a period of episodes, there is no way you can fit that many different stories into 2 hours. Then again I don't watch any sitcoms so similar things probably have been done before. I just really liked how everything "developed."

__________________

Haha, yeah, that's one of the biggest concerns I've heard about the movie. But if you think about it, its totally possible. Think of your favorite movie and how intricate they can make it, with no back story, in just 2ish hours. I'm sure Ron Howard can pull it off. I'm fucking stoaked.

__________________

I'd just like to take this moment to point out that 'post-production' refers to the period after the principal photography (i.e. 'production') for a film has occurred, during which time editing, scoring, color-correcting, etc are completed. 'Pre-production' refers to the period, after the script and funding have all come together, during which the planning for the principal photography occurs.

The Arrested Development film is in neither period of production; it's been announced for years but really is yet to be a real project, however far along they are with the screenplay. I'll believe it's going to be made when photography actually commences.

And Ron Howard is not the director of that film, as announced.

Oops. I did mean pre-production, but I thought that they had the funding sorted out and most of the script done and that the term also referred to any sort of period in the birthing stages. Will you still tongue punch my anus, anyway?

__________________

I will only punch your anus with the tip of my penis. And then the shaft. And then the base. And then maybe the tongue, if you can make me cum. But you haven't yet, bitch.

In any case, I'd expect that any project that does not yet have a script is not yet greenlighted, as that is, generally, the way it works. There are exceptions, but you never know when they'll be.

Even more than that, I'd expect any project named 'Arrested Development' to be in developmental hell for years and years. Also, years. Keep in mind how much success they found in getting funding for their TV show.

You know what? I'm sick of me asking for it. You come to me when you want to be my punch meat, like it how it was back when we were in love and gurgling each others jizz meant something.

__________________

I think you've got me confused with your mother. She should be insulted; she's got a waaay bigger dick than I have.

Oh my god, I've set myself up for an easy 'small dick' comeback! Whatever shall I do if somebody accuses my penis of being small over the internet? I believe that would kill me!

Also, Chris Reznpzchendes is uglier than ugly and there is no hope in sight for 'Arrested Development' fans. Especially those hoping to have a good time fucking Chris Strensendes.

Nah, I don't keep up with all of those channels daily or even weekly. Current, IFC and G4 are the primary channels I view.

I'm just about to start watching the final series of The Wire. The fourth was fucking TIGHT, yo! Snoop is a genuinely frightening lil' woman, and Omar makes me want to be black more than Chris Bellendes does. That said, Omar doesn't make me wanna be a black woman as much as Chris does. We'll always have that, Christobel

Holy fuckballs, Martin Scorsese directed the pilot episode for a new series and will serve as executive producer from then on:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boardwalk_Empire

I'm completely comfortable with the fact that I have an erection. My little brother, who bought this new series to my attention, is gonna get all 4 inches of it, the lucky lil' blighter that he is.

Christ let this be good. Steve Buscemi is pretty much 100% awesome in everything he's ever appeared in, and the series is created/written by one of the primary writers from The Sopranos, so I'm confident that this is going to rock my socks off.

Still in love with Arrested Development. And Entourage.

__________________

I caught the pilot episode when it aired. It was pretty tits, needless to say, for all the reasons you posted and then some. I was going to write about it in here but I must have forgotten. Go get it, son!

And forever in love with Arrested Development.

__________________

Entourage is awesome man, i've been watching for years. There's no way that there wont be another season after the way they ended this one. Vince with a coke addiction hahaha.

__________________

I'm about 2/3 of the way through the Boardwalk Empire pilot episode, and although it's quite slow I'm enjoying the fuck out of it (my detour here isn't a reflection on the show, but a reflection on my deep neurosis). I'm extremely happy to see Stephen Graham playing Al Capone. The guy's from Liverpool and it's impressive how well he masks his thick accent, although it's not perfect (but when is it ever?).

I still haven't watched more than one episode of Arrested Development, and I think at this stage it's unlikely I will, at least not for another 3 or 4 years.

I finished watching The Wire soon after my last post about The Wire (what a car wreck of a sentence that was). Fuckin' impressive, primarily for the authenticity. Speaking of which, Omar makes an appearance in the first episode of Boardwalk Empire! SCORE! The only problem is that he sounds almost indistinguishable from his character in The Wire. Was Baltimore even founded during Prohibition?

Still the better part of a year before more Breaking Bad graces our retinas. I should just about be finished watching the The Godfather* trilogy by that point, so it's all good.

* I wasn't sure if two instances of the word "the" were warranted here. The series is called The Godfather, so any reference to it must surely be written as "the The Godfather trilogy". Help me with my wordses!

YOU FUCKING SPOILER

__________________

Hahahahaha!

Paddy, watch two more episodes. I garen-fucking-tee you'll love it. I haven't let you astray yet.

__________________

My mother might disagree with that statement. She warned me about boys like you!

I've got a lot of shit to watch before I start "courtesy watching" other shit. It's a busy life this life of mine!

hahahaaha, its been out for months man

__________________

I read that as "I haven't let you ashtry yet" and was thinking "what the fuck did I type?". I'm telling you, Pads, you're missing out. I'm sure you can find the time to watch two episodes.

Even the public agrees its the best: http://www.doobybrain.com/wp-conten...development.jpg

__________________

Last night there was a documentary about subcultures in Poland in early 90'. Goog old times:P
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54Qtk_aQB3U
Good song btw
little clip of what was going on the streets back in the day Don't let this to change your opinion about Poland heheheh

__________________

Videos like that make me cry and want to shoot the whole world. But it seems that certain persons feel bound to the place on earth where they live and they have a need to defence it against other people "infecting" their culture.
Fuckfuckfuckfuckedyfuckass

__________________

Does anyone watch the show Dexter? I watched the first episode last night. It's about some dude who works as a splattered blood pattern analyst for the police, who kills mad people on the side. Seems like a pretty fucked up show, and they're into the 5th season now i believe

__________________

Yeah, you're about 5 years too late.

__________________

Cry me a river. Look what goes on in France or Nederlands. I don't mind emigrants if they accept our customs and our rules.

In the 90' there were regular fights between skinheads and punks all over Poland. And football hooligans were much more "brutal" Good memories though

__________________

Mhm that`s exactly what I`m thinking. But as long as people aren`t ready to migrate themselves in their country we`ll have a problem. And I have an eye on the whole world, me knows where the shits going dooooown.



Skinheads aren`t Nazis I`m sorry but I can`t stand it when someone is saying skinhead to a friggin bone-nazi-asshead.

__________________

Some of them are. Actually there are Oi Skinheads and NS Skinheads. In Poland there are also NR (national radicals).

__________________

Mmmh if they call themselves skinheads, well it`s just wrong for the fact that the name comes from the ska scene which is unpolitical or left. But seriously what else did I expect

__________________

subcultures evolve. Punk was apolitical a first too.

__________________

Well it`s not a bad thing at all that punks started to think I`m spending almost every weekend at some alternative-left and self-organized houses and places and most of them are very intelligent, believe it or not!
Speaking of subcultures evolving, is emo still there?

__________________

Skinheads, Nazis, both are annoying.

__________________

LOOK AT ME I DRESS LIKE A WORKING CLASS ENGLISH MAN FROM THE EARLY 80'S AND HAVE SHORT HAIR AND MUTTON CHOPS. IM A SKINHEAD, BUT PEOPLE THAT THINK IM A NAZI ARE SO RUDE. LOL.

__________________

I was talking to a British person several days ago and he said he was having skinheads on a raft for dinner. I had to ask what that is. It's curried beans on toast.

I guess we had massacred skinheads last night. Chili with ground beef.

__________________

That explains a lot All this AFA idiots are licking muslim asses, but they would be first to be hanged if they start their rules And one more thing Antifa hooligans - lol - hooligans that cry for help and police when they get their asses kicked.

don't get me wrong, I'm not a racist or skinhead, dude, I'm polish, I look like mexican and I have russian surname. Enough? But when you look what goes on in western Europe especially in France it just makes you sick. They let these people in, gave them bunch of benefits and now they whant to introduce sharia law or other shit. If they don't like Europe, they can go back to their camels and sand dunes.

__________________

Didn't you used to live in Belfast?

The massive Polish influx in N. Ireland has been met with a similar attitude by certain kinds of people, and I'm pretty sure they aren't all legal immigrants or working full-time jobs (and even if they were that'd just be another sore point - whose job did they take etc.). Should they be ousted by a mob of flag-waving bigots and sent back to Poland?

The idea that Muslim immigrants can change a foreign government into some sort of Sharia nightmare is a fantasy held by people who are infinitely more fascistic in their thinking than the average practising Muslim, even if Muslims are indeed calling for it. The Irish have been invading countries for centuries and the biggest cultural impact we ever had was the introduction of Irish theme pubs, ginger wigs and institutionalised paedophilia.

Get a cab driver's license and be done with it!

P.S. TV thread!

I've officially stopped watching Family Guy, The Cleveland Show, The Simpsons and probably American Dad. They cause actual physical pain in my brain lobes, like a stress headache or something. I can't take it anymore.

Boardwalk Empire's third episode aired last night (just downloaded it). I've read that Scorsese may direct further episodes in the future, assuming the show has some steam. That'd be just swell.

Yeah I used to i still have " Still an inrepentant Fenian bastard" t - shirt:P And yes, if some Poles are making 'problems' they should be treated properly. I've seen polish guys who steal, robbed other Poles etc. If they ever get a glasgow smile I'll be more than happy. BTW I remember one polish guy and a chinese who spoke polish (yeah, i wasn't stoned) who extorted polish workers near "industrial temps". someone treated them with Belfast's well known hospitality and kneecapped them both All Poles thank You It's not about the ethnicity or race, it's about culture. They don't respect our values so why we should respect them?

But You guys completely missed my point, I don't mind emigrants who work, study etc. But when I go somewhere I accept the rules that are there. Ever heard of Theo Van Gogh?
France: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YNIKz9b8FAA
It is not about taking over the country, but muslims want us to respect sharia law. Fuck them. Europe needs to grow some balls again.

__________________

+1 on that but not on the muslim thing. Does accepting a religion really means licking their ass? As far as I know our AFA actually don`t cares about religion and only acts in political and not religious things. And yeeeeah of course you can always find something that has to do with both and where they get involved and then blah blah blah
I`m not in the antifascist organisation or something like that. I hate those dudes.
Hooliganism is almost dead in Germany only in the lower class football there`s still real violence but looking at e.g. St.Pauli (biggest bastards ever ) these guys are calling the cops for real, right after they screamed ACAB. Tools.

__________________

Yeah I got St. Pauli t shirt as well, heheh after long visit to Repeerbahn
Football fans got a bit calmer in Poland too, but there are still some fights witch knives, axes or machetes
not quite long ago, french television made a documentary about two local teams from my hometown, of course there was a huge scandal but everyone who knows what is really going on, knows that this antisemitism is just a pose:P
here it is, is it different in Germany?:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RW9CR5onNV8
Resovia all the way baby!

__________________

BTW Last Dexter episode sucked.

__________________

Huge difference man, only a few ultra groups still take non-football-related politics into their support. This antisemitism is just plain stupid and how do you support your team by yelling FUCK THE JEWS? Makes no sense for me The thing with hooligan fights over here is that our hools barely use weapons. It just has no honor to strike your enemy down with a kife or something like that.

But okay I have to admit I`m not that into the hool-scene but a few friends of mine are. I`m more an Ultra then a hool if you know what I mean. I think I can support a team more with my voice then with my fist

__________________

It has nothing to do with politics. Well 'jew' is considered to be offensive word by hooligans, its a remnant of old times when most of hools were skinheads. I can asure You that none of this guys know or even spoke to a jew in their live.

There are only two footbal clubs in pl that use weapons - Cracovia Kraków and Wisła Kraków. Other teams signed a pact in 90's and they only fight without it. And by the way - Cracovia hooligans call them self Jude Gang It's becouse first players were jewish and they are proud of it.
http://www.wikipasy.pl/images/0/0d/...djęcie.jpg

__________________

Haha I remember that, and I also remember you telling me that you lived on the Shankill Road! You must have brass balls.

Back on topic:

Boardwalk Empire is picking up steam. I was somewhat disappointed to learn that although the show deals with historical figures and events it's nowhere near historically accurate, nor does it try to be. I was kinda hoping for a somewhat accurate overview of how shit went down and how Al Capone and Lucky Luciano got a foothold in the criminal underworld etc. Oh well.

Considering neither of them gained their foothold in Jersey you were always hoping for too much, Ginger.

Fair point well madecunt.

I'm not sure if this broadcasts outside of the UK but I've watched all 6 series of Ideal over the past week or so. Comedian Johnny Vegas stars as a small time pot dealer, and despite the fact that the guy's infinitely funnier when he's being himself it's a damn good show. It all takes place in the dealer's flat, with some scenes shot in neighbouring flats, and it's written by Graham Duff who also has a role as one of the most awesomest gay stereotypes I've seen since I accidentally caught a 3 second glimpse of Strictly Come Dancing. The "Cartoon Head" character is fucking inspired, too.

Well I didn't wear it on Shankill. i'm not bulletproff ;]

__________________

For anyone who has seen the Shane Meadows film This is England you have to get your hands on the 4-episode TV series This is England '86, which is set a few years after the original story and involves the same actors/characters. This is some of the best television I've seen since they started serialising pornos in the early 90s.

It's both hilarious and harrowing, and has some of the strongest acting you're likely to see of late (on British television, at least). In fact, the actors from the original film are a good 30% better in the series. The writing is seamless and every line of dialogue rings true. Meadows is steadily becoming one of my favourite British writers/directors.

Torrents:

Original Movie
Ep1
Ep2
Ep3
Ep4

I've also been following An Idiot Abroad, the last episode of which is due to air this Thursday in the UK. It's a travel show in which Karl Pilkington (the likeable one out of the Ricky Gervais Trio of Cunts) visits the seven wonders of the world and, predictably, hates every minute of it. It's pretty damn funny, even if the outline is a little hackneyed. Definitely worth a look.

The last episode of South Park was fucking amazing. I was crying with laughter, which is something the show hasn't done for me in years. Christ I hope they can keep this shit up.

Interesting, I thought that was the worst episode of the season, seems like my friends also disagree with me. Shake weight is an old joke

The first few episodes were really good though.

__________________

The Walking Dead!

__________________

What I've been watching:

Boardwalk Empire - Amazing for regular television standards. Alright for HBO. I give it 7.5/10. I love Buscemi and that Irish chick is hot. Still way behind Rome, The Wire, Six Feet Under, etc.

The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret - There are some annoying characters but you gotta love David Cross and Will Arnet. 7.5/10 (off air until...??)

Real Time With Bill Maher - Even though I think he's an asshole, I love his show...unless the panel guests suck (like Mos Def). I can't believe some of the people who agree to come on his show, particularly this season. Eric Cantor? Bill O'Reilly? Jimmy Carter ffs. Really? 9.5/10 (off air until January)



The Walking Dead is alright. Like the theme of zombies but some of the characters are silly. "He's a racist...." "He hits women...." That's a "CSI" move.

__________________

Yeah, it's a bit cheesy at first but the point is that the 'humans' are worse then the zombies! Sometimes looks can be deceiving, just look at the homeboy loco's in episode 4.

I wonder how far it will go but I think we're in for some pretty horrifying shit!

Yes! It really felt like the good ol' days of South Park. It was so spot-fucking-on. I was rolling, too.



There are some episodes that were great, and others that were just so-so. The season finale was fucking hilarious, though. You could see that they planted a lot of jokes that finally blossomed in that episode. The scene with Cross with the deaf tour group had me laughing at the top of my lungs. "Are you un-deaf? Congratulations!" is one of my favorite things I've ever heard. That, and "Oh, don't worry. That's just the baby's blood."

I actually saw the pilot at a David Cross stand-up. He played it as his encore. Also one of the best episodes.

I WILL FUCK YOU LIKE MIKE TYSON ON E!

Bored to Death is a show I warmed up to. I would only watch it for Zach Galifianakis at first, but then I slowly started to like the characters, and suddenly it got funny. I can't fucking stand the intro song though. Another intro song that bugs me is Boardwalk Empire's. The song itself is fine, but it feels really incongruous with the show and setting. Its weird listening to some alt-rock song and seconds latter hearing 20's jazz in a world where distortion won't exist for another 40 years.

__________________

After reading this I searched the web for Shake Weights. I had no idea these were real! I watched some of the official advertisements for this fucked-up product and I was laughing harder than when I watched the South Park episode.

Fuck me.

Yeah, they are pretty ridiculous. Just like the shoes that are supposed to help you tone muscles because it's like standing on tennis balls. Research shows the only thing they do is strengthen ankles. Total waste of money. No, I didn't fall for it.
And I don't need a darn shake weight to jiggle what I've got.

__________________

So I say
Thank you for the image, the pic you're painting,
Thanks for all the horror you're bringing,
I could definitely live without it, I ask in all honesty
Why did you have to say that to me?
Now you jiggling is all I can see!
So I say thank you for the image
For giving it to me.

Fuck me ABBA rules.

Futurama had a holiday special recently, and it was probably the most torturous piece of shit episode in the entire lifespan of the show. Fucking monotonous, unfunny, disjointed nonsense. And THREE, count 'em, THREE musical numbers to endure. Musical numbers in cartoons is the bane of my fucking existence.

No one will read this

Aight I'm ready to go with this bitch. And Vince I'm not kidding you'd BETTER lay off of the coke this time, you're turning asshole, you just don't see it cause it makes you think everyone's a pussy. Trust me dog I've been there. Aight stupid Janes Addiction, get your stupid lyrics and worst guitarsolo ever out of my ears plz. Thaaat's it.

Ah shit Vince is not home yet? Ah come on calm down Johnny. My God you turned sympathetic this season, not too clever but always up front and caring, ultimately. Oh hey Turtle, how's the deal going aaahhhhhhhhh too bad, it'll work out, it's this season's finale, it'll work out.

AH SHIT THAT'S RITE THE LITTLE LEAGUE GAME. Okay now it's fo sho that Vince is snorting milkpowder laced with some coke if he's lucky somewhere. Aaaah come ON man you KNOW Ari's wife is gonna bitch to him even though it's not HIS fa-oh THEEEEEEERE we go. Misses Gold you're hot and errythang, but get the fuck over yourself and start realising how demanding Ari's job is.
WILL YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP
BITCH, VINCE EMBARASSED YOUR FAMILY, ARI DID EVERYTHING HE CO - OH YEAH WALK AWAY, WALK AWAY YEAH THAT'S REALLY STRONG WOMAN AND ALL OF YOU.

Now I shall proceed to yell at my screen for 20 minutes, please hold.

VINCE DONT YOU DARE SCREAM AT JOHNNY. DON'T YOU DARE SCREAM AT OH FUCK OFF. FUCK OFF YOU TWAT, YOU'VE BEEN ON THIS WHOLE COKE THING FOR WHAT, A MONTH? IT TOOK ME FUCKING EIGHT MONTHS TO TURN ASSHOLE, FUCKING PUSSY. DON'T yell at Johnny. DON'T.

OKAY MISSES GOLD YOU'D BEST HAVE CHILLED
THE FUCK
OUT
Okay good
What
NO WHAT?

WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING YOU JEWISH FUCKING WHORE shit you're hot with those tears WHAT THE FUCK
ARI HAS THE MOST DEMANDING JOB, WITH LITTLE SLUTS THROWING THEMSELVES AT HIS CIRCUMSIZED COCK TRYING TO ACHIEVE STARDOM 24/7 HE DIDN'T EVEN CHEAT ON YOU NOT ONCE IN HIS LIFE
OH DON'T YOU HANG UP
DONT YOU HANG AAAAAAAAAH FUCK OFF THEN HE CAN DO BETTER.

Oh hey Eminem. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW SO THAT'S WHY THIS EPISODE IS CALLED LOSE YO SEEELF. Shoulda seen that one coming, damn I'd have felt smart.

VINCE YOU'RE MAKING AN ASS OUT OF YOURSELF. OH SHIT I HOPE THEY LACE YOUR STASH WITH GLASS LIKE THEY DID TO MY FRIEND ONCE, HOLY SHIT I HOPE YOUR NOSE SPURTS BLOOD JUST AS FAR AS HIS DID. JOHNNY CAME ALL THE WAY UP HERE, HE'S FUCKING CONCERNNNNNED ABOUT YOU WICH IS MORE THAN YOU DESERVE AT THIS STAGE

CHILL THE FUCK OUT OKAY
DATS RIGHT EMINEM SLAP HIS FUCKING FACE, SLAP
HIS
FUCKING
FACE

Goddamnit where's the usual Happy Ending Deus Ex Machina they pull off each time. It's getting late and I'm not gonna be able to cope without one. Aight at least E and Turtle are okay

WHAT THE FUCK VINCE
YOU FUCKED UP
I STARTED HATING YOU LIKE 4 EPISODES BACK BUT NOW YOU FUCKING MESSED UP
WHAT THE FUCK

BAM. IN. YOUR. NUMB. FACE.
HAD THAT ONE CO



WHAT?
CREDITS ROLL?

NO NO NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO NO NO NONONONO NO. DON'T DO THIS SHIT MAN, Y'ALL KNOW WE NEED A HAPPY ENDING, AH FUCK OFF YOU DID IT EVERY SEASON BY SOME MAGICAL HAPPY PHONECALL.

OUT OF ALL SEASONS YOU OOOOOH YOU MOTHERFUCKERS. OHOHOHOOOOOOOOO YOU MOTHERFUCKERS.

SHOULDA DONE THIS IN THE PREVIOUS SEASON MAN, AT LEAST THEN I COULD QUICKLY HIT THE NEXT SEASON AND FIND OUT ALL OF YOU'S OKAY
ESPECIALLY TURTLE AND DRAMA.

OH COME OOOOOOOOON DON'T DO THIS TO ME MAN
IT'S GONNA TAKE SO FUCKING LOOOONG TILL THE NEXT SEASON
SHIT
AH PLEASE NOT EVEN A PREVIEW? WHAT THE FUCK! I'M GONNA HAVE TO SPEND THE NEXT COUPLE MONTHS IN A STATE OF WORRY ABOUT E DRAMA AND TURTLE?
DON'T DO THIS BRO, DON'T FUCKING DO THIS BRO
YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING TO ME BRO I'M WARNING YOU DON'T FUCKING PULL THIS SHIT OFF BRAH






OH COME OOOON

__________________

true, but your rage is impressive none the less.

I finally downloaded all the seasons of Breaking Bad, watched the first episode and it was really good. I'm a few years late but whatever.

__________________

Yeah, but at least you don't have to wait months on end to see the resolution to the last seaon's finale. Fuck, those are hard times.

__________________

Possible Breaking Bad spoiler to follow:

Season 4 is due to start in June, I believe. That's a "possible spoiler" because if you know there's another season coming then you will know that no one important dies at the end of the third one.

It's probably the only telly I'm looking forward to at the moment.

Oh, you know you like anything that Chris Hansen is on.

__________________

Chris Hansen is like Hitler to my kind.

ACKKKK! TV BAD! This show on History Channel is talking about the possibility that the Irish discovered America IN A SKIN BOAT!!!

__________________

A skin boat? You mean they sailed across the ocean on a giant cock? I dread to think what their life-preservers were made from.

The Irish pretty much did everything first. No one had even heard of bukkake until St. Patrick bukkaked a bunch of Protestants with his 6 penises from a hot air balloon, which he also invented. And the last time I checked paedophilia and illegal immigration were generally frowned upon until we made it cool.

I know St. Pat was a Protestant, but much like Christ the religion he was born into has little relevance, it's what they did with their lives that matters. St. Pads freed us from snakes and softened our puritanical attitudes to sodomising pre-teens, and Christ invented the two-handed full-penetrative handjob. Obviously that wasn't until after the crucifixion...

I've grown to seriously dislike these "documentary mills" like the History Channel and Discovery Channel, and Horizon in the UK. You watch for an hour and you learn precisely fuck-all from them. It all feels like build-up to a climax which never really arrives, much like being friends with Dylan.

I recently finished watching the main TV run of Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! Fucking pure genius. I fucking love these guys.

I was turned on to them after watching Check it Out! With Dr. Steve Brule. Another work of pure unadulterated orgasm.

YouTube dem shits.

That show I spoke of basically was pointing to the idea that there are people from everywhere that came here to live for whatever reason. I thought it was pretty interesting though.

__________________

Back to the masters then! I've picked down a few of the gems in my collection from the shelf today; the Life series (Attenborough), and currently, the one and only, Carl Sagan's Cosmos. I've seen it so many times, first time when I was like eight or so, but it never grows old. That's one that will live through the ages.

__________________

They ever going to make more?

Nice! I have a huge hard on for both Attenborough and Sagan.

__________________

I've seen Sagan's Cosmos billions and billions of times. And when I did I was probably in the same condition he was, too, (nudge, nudge, wink, wink) 30 years ago. We'd all sit around and watch him, Jacques Cousteau, or Nova. Cousteau was good with the sound off and Pink Floyd on the stereo.

__________________

If Carl Sagan's so great how come he's dead?

I think I saw Cosmos a few years ago. Can't remember much about it though. Attenborough is the daddy when it comes to natural history, but unfortunately I couldn't give a fuck about animals unless they're in a casserole, so I tend to get bored of his shows quite quickly.

I fuckin' hope so, but I'm not sure for sure.

so far over spring break I have watched:

The Walking Dead season 1
Generation Kill (for the second time)
Dexter season 1 and some of 2

__________________

For the same reason that you're !!!!! Life SUCKS.

I very much recommend taking the time to watch it again. For my own part, to some small degree I blame Sagan for the fact that I can do triple integrals in my head. There's just something that make all those hours of study worth it.

The thing about the Life series is that you could just as well turn the sound off and still have a good experience watching it. The work of the camera crew is amazing.

__________________

You ever seen Planet Earth, Amadeus? That's a fucking incredible one, too. You guys have Attenborough narating it, though. In the states we have Sigourney Weaver (who actually does a great job, though it was totally not necessary).

DQ: I couldn't get into The Walking Dead for some reason, and I watched the first 4ish episodes. It felt too much like a straight drama. And I swear to God, if one more person tells me I should watch fucking Dexter, I'll-I'll-I'll.. probably give it ago. Maybe not. I'm sure its great but I really don't have time to start a new series. Top Chef, Bizzare Foods, and The Office get all my attention.

__________________

I've seen a good chunk of it, but I can't even recall how long ago. When was it made anyway?

__________________