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2009-04-19, 23:17
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 1,924
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Beautiful Affair
Beautiful affair
Bitter sweet agony
Will you always define me
Does the past go by
Or will I always be forced to hide
Thoughts run wild
Though the feelings take no stride
Understand the situation
Never been fully advised
On this thing called life
Take a deep breath
Inhale the smoke
I feel like dying
The calm no thoughts
Seems so appealing
Thoughts run wild
Though the feelings take no stride
Understand the situation
Never been fully advised
On this thing called life
Beautiful affair
Bitter sweet agony
Defining moment
Ones set in
Never forget
The values of it all
Before the initial thaw
Take another breath...
Feel the rush of air...
Slowly come out...
Of this forgotten trance..
__________________
“Remember to live, eat, sleep and breathe music for the mind, play from your heart and never be swayed by the current trends.” ~Rusty Cooley
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2009-04-19, 23:34
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
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Questions. Are there pauses between The calm - no thoughts -
Seems so appealing or am I just reading it wrong?
And in the 5th stanza is that Ones right or is it supposed to be once?
Have you set this to music or is it poetry? I'm listening to a live version of "Epitaph" by King Crimson and the tone of the music fits well with your piece. Nice job, btw.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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2009-04-19, 23:37
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 1,924
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
Questions. Are there pauses between The calm - no thoughts -
Seems so appealing or am I just reading it wrong?
And in the 5th stanza is that Ones right or is it supposed to be once?
Have you set this to music or is it poetry? I'm listening to a live version of "Epitaph" by King Crimson and the tone of the music fits well with your piece. Nice job, btw.
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Yep pause is correct, and is suppose to be "Ones", and it's more poetry than anything, but i definitely will have to check out this Epitaph song you speak of.
Thanks for the feed back.
__________________
“Remember to live, eat, sleep and breathe music for the mind, play from your heart and never be swayed by the current trends.” ~Rusty Cooley
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2009-04-19, 23:52
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
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Looks like the ole girl has to give you youngsters an education about where yer metal roots came from. 
Thank you for the explanations.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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