2008-11-11, 20:46
|
|
Post-whore
|
|
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,136
|
|
"Devastated"
"Devastated"
Jacob Fitzlaff
11/11/08
From the rooftops of the Belvedere
They reign in blood and terror and fear
And this is how the story ends
But where did it all begin
Once upon a time
There was a land of love and the kids were fine
There was no hate or war or crime
And everyone survived
But then they all came marching in
Building walls to put an end
To the freedoms that we all enjoyed
Our only exit was destroyed
So will you fight for the flag
Take a life so willingly
You'll be bound and gagged
If they find out you disagree
I declare them to be the enemy
Enemies of peace
So what else could we do
We watched as the riots ensued
Not for what was on our minds
But to keep us all in line
Everywhere you looked
There was bullet holes and burning books
Shattered homes and broken glass
You could taste the sulfur and smell the ash
And now the fire burns
A vigil to our unsaid words
One nation for the bourgeoisie
One nation of debris
So will you fight for the flag
Take a life unerringly
You'll be bound and gagged
If they catch you out on the streets
I declare them to be the enemy
Enemies of peace
And even when we're dead and gone
The fight will carry on and on
Even when we're dead and gone
The fight will carry on and on
Even when we're dead and gone
The fight will carry on and on
After we are dead and gone
The fight will carry on
So will you fight for the flag
Bow your head to complanceny
You'll be bound and gagged
If you ever try to be set free
I declare them to be the enemy
I declare them to be our enemy
I declare them to be the enemies of peace
__________________
Worker bees can leave,
Even drones can fly away.
The queen is their slave.
www.maddox.xmission.com
|
2008-11-11, 20:59
|
|
dsnt trust ne1 < 30
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
|
|
Hi Jake! Nice to see you back around again.
Is it coincidental that you posted a piece like this on Veteran's Day? I googled Belvedere to see if that would help determine exactly what you're referring to, but that didn't help a bit so what's the background for the piece?
As far as just the content goes it's got a good balance of topic. The title is perfect.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
|
2008-11-11, 22:33
|
|
Post-whore
|
|
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,136
|
|
Good to know that you are still around as well !
I actually came up with these last night, so yeah Veteran's Day is really coincidental. Almost too coincidental
Belvedere is an Italian word that means "beautiful view." Also some kind of architectural thing that is completely irrelevant to the song.
I was really nervous about the title, I really couldn't decide on anything. Not even my girlfriend, who is leagues and leagues more intelligent that I could ever hope to be, had no ideas. So just went with the generic, kind of vague title.
I think, upon rereading that in line 27 I'm going to change "fire" to "fires." Mark that one up to continuity.
You were just the person I wanted to see this, I'm glad you were lurking today.
__________________
Worker bees can leave,
Even drones can fly away.
The queen is their slave.
www.maddox.xmission.com
|
2008-11-12, 10:06
|
Metalhead
|
|
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Vienna
Posts: 92
|
|
Nice one!
Btw, Belvedere is the name of a castle here in Vienna, but it was quite obvious you didn't referred to this
|
2008-11-12, 21:24
|
|
dsnt trust ne1 < 30
|
|
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
|
|
That's cool and thanks. When I looked it up there was about 20 different things pertaining to it so I didn't have a clue which was the right one.
And fires gives a whole different scenerio to that verse. I think it works better, too.
A castle in Vienna? That sounds wonderful, but I won't get off topic.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is Off
|
|
|
|