Verse I

wind-tortured mountains erect in their domain
a monolith, surveys the land
the whispering leaves cry in solitude
"oh great sorrow! to see life again"
white palms harbor the frigid spine

Verse II

Layers of white, drown the captives in
the empty passes; sunken in cold,
always unfound by passerby,
"you are free to go!" the captor
exclaims, lips peeled wide in a grin

Chorus

The moon
eyes kept wide
in glee
smiles for thee

Damned
ages gone
alone
wind-swept realm


Verse III

The mountains in their splendour
one and another, exposed, alone
zealous gusts, leave them bare
trudging footsteps' traces disappear
Disappointment reared at every peak

Verse IV

The realm without end, taunting those
kept eternally, whose tears freeze
and souls diminish hopelessly
in the tearing malicious winds

Chorus

The moon
eyes kept wide
in glee
smiles for thee

Damned
ages gone
alone
wind-swept realm



so the structure is

V
V
C

V
V
C


this is my first one with structure and it may not be very coherent, but I was inspired to do sometihng by the song (into the infinity of thoughts) and wanted to write at least something

bump

hah, you said "erect". [/butthead]

some of it is cool. some of it sounds odd. and this:

sounds bad.