Go for it!

http://www.myramcwethy.com/BeardedLady04.jpg

Paddy, please, come home! You can have your room back.


1000 apologies to your mum. I'm sure she's wonderful.

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You're just jealous because she only has 10% facial hair coverage and, unlike you, she doesn't have to soak her face in a bowl of gasoline before her hedge trimmers can have a hope of cutting through her twig-like bristles.

I don't use hedge trimmers! I use a weed wacker!!! I can't help my 5 o'clock shadow.

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If only it were just a shadow, then maybe you wouldn't have to bring a written note from your doctor with you everywhere you go confirming your gender in case you want to use the lady's room or try on dresses in a clothes shop or have your chewy meat-salad prodded by a gynaecologist.

That's for you. And you spelled groinocologist wrong!

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That already happened to me once in Thailand. I went to see a show, involving ping-pong balls and what I can only describe as a shaved, toothless rodent (the lighting was very bad). Ping-pong balls were flying at me at high velocity, with some sticking to me and leaving a stinking, slimy, shiny blotch of my face and neck. Then suddenly I felt a warm, wet, splattery thud against my forehead. It smelled like a can of freshly opened tuna, and tasted like a not-so-freshly opened can of baked beans. It wasn't until 3 years later when I was watching "The Top 100 Worst Variety Acts in the World" that I realised that the performer in question - who turned out not to have a shaved, toothless rodent between her legs after all - was pregnant, and CCTV footage of the ordeal was played back showing me sniffing myself and patting my forehead to see what was dripping off of it. What happened was, she squeezed a little too hard and ended up miscarrying chunks of the foetus all over my face, and the souvenir doll I brought home for my niece turned out to be the woman's premature daughter, Ling Ping Sking Sling Ping Ping Wing Sing.

True story.

My husband said he saw a show like that almost when he was in the Phillipines or someplace like that. Well, at least the ping pong ball part.

Really true story.

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Almost? Ahhhh, he must have had a front row seat and ended up getting eliminated in the first round with a smelly ping-pong ball between the eyes at 500M/ph.

Not quite like that. I guess she was pretty talented cuz she could catch, too.

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"sixsicsix grew tired of his bass, but soon found a new hobby."

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I'm sure ping-pong balls weren't the only thing she'd caught over the course of her career.

Here's another one:

http://img268.imageshack.us/img268/1227/chickenhead.jpg

"Chicken Little woke up with a bad case of bread head."

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i can't think of a good caption, but i do find it funny that it's a black person holding the fried chicken head

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lol I hadn't noticed. Amusing observation.

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How did that stereotype come about? Every white person I know - without exception - has fried chicken at least once a week. It's fuckin' yummy yumtimes!

you must be one of those "black irish"

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And now for your culture lesson. Chicken was a mainstay of southern cooking and it, like watermelon and greens, got to be stereotypical because a lot of black people made it there. The south is deep fried anything moreso than the north.

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But the implication of that is that the white people who lived there ate it just as much as the black people did. If not, what did the white people mainly eat?

Pretty much every chicken product we have here is "Southern Fried", meaning Southern American fried haha. I never get tired of eating that stuff, and it's heart-warming that businesses in the UK and Ireland are still catering their foods to their customer base on the notion that it has some link with America, the coolest country on earth. Not even illegal, unjust wars for empire and government-sanctioned torture could change that sentiment, it seems!

Ahhhh you know I love ya's

Yes, but I'm just lovable anyway. I can't help it.

Everybody eats it, but they made the best.

Okay, damn it Paddy! I'll say it! That picture is really an ad for your restaurant. "Paddy's Deep Fried Cocks" There are you happy now?

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Haha! Nice

Tell that to Abdul while you're zapping his balls with a cattle prod

You know I gots jokes!

I've yet to try black man's chicken, I've only had sausage and meatballs so far.

You gotta try Irishman's spuds - rich in essential salts, starches, male chauvinism and obscurantism*!

* I don't know what this word means, and I have no desire to find out, thankyouverymuch.

Hahaha I don't know what you were worried about! Besides everything else, any post you make immediately after mine will probably seem like prose by comparison.

Sausage and meatballs are traditionally Italian or Swedish around here.
You want something southern and sweet? Pecan pie or sweet potato pie. Heavenly. Pecan pie is good with a shot of bourbon.

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It's even better with £50 and a handjob.

Hey, I'd take the food. I know those would be satisfying.

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http://img10.imageshack.us/img10/6259/badtiming.jpg

My kangaroo costume must be more convincing than I thought.

"about time someone feeds me i was running out of energy"

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"Advanced human babies are spat from the mouths of kangaroos as they mate in the confines of Australia's Queen's Park bypassing the normal stages of development such as potty training, learning to walk, and speech. They are also born fully clothed."

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The first thing that came to mind when I read that was Phil Lynott

(R.I.P)

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"Don't worry, sport. I'm not hurting your mom."

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"Semen?"

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HAHA!

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"For today's bible class: Genesis 1:22"

Fuck fried chicken. Greasy fish & chips are t3h ultimate

No

Bourbon has a sickly sweet syrupy taste. I remember my friend Andrew had me try a shot of Jack Daniels once, and within about two seconds of swallowing it, I vomited up my nose and all over my pants. He's never let me forget that one and still has a good piss about it to this day.

I do love Canadian and Scottish whiskey though. Especially the latter. A few ounces poured straight in a glass... mmmm, goes perfect with a cigar

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good one

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"The middle-aged lady in the background didn't know she was feeding the animals incorrectly until she saw an 8 year old girl put her to shame"

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a day when all avil have the power and men is just have to gollow

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its just some web bot thing



lbxxx- says image not found

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It's working okay for me. Hmm. See if anyone else has trouble.

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not working. images are not hosted there for too long and they eventually get deleted, depending on the board. but then again i was banned from 4chan about 2 years ago

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I'm willing to bet Paddy has been banned from there like 15 times

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for uploading midget porn

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midget child porn

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Haha yes, that's the one. It HAD to have been more than just midget porn... I'm sure there were at least a few animals thrown in there too.

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I don't get it. I can click on it and the Star Wars looking guy sitting on the squirrel with a pile of nuts in front of it still shows up now. Oh well. It was cute. I thought you guys might like it.

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Haha I've seen that one somewhere else a long time ago. Pretty weird

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In a galaxy far, far away?

HA!

Haha, you cheesy bastard

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Not anymore! Thanks, penicillin!

Oh dear, were you cheesing again? Poor cats.

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Cock cheese

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You don't watch South Park, do you?

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Haha

http://onlybigdicks.com/fetish/dick...megma22_jpg.jpg

Did you know there are actually fetish sites for dick cheese?!?!? I didn't until I just looked it up. Weird.

Warning : People with a sensitive stomach should NOT click on that link. You have been warned.

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Dude?

You looked up dickcheese.

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It takes alot to make my stomach turn man. I have a pretty high tolerance for disgust

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SON!!!!!!!!!
I think CLR will take that off. It looks like the same stuff that gets on my water faucets from calcium.

YES I LOOKED. Not for long, but I did.
gwose

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HAHA!

CLR... ouch!!! That would burn like mad!

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Fuck me, I can nearly smell that from here. Oh wait, my flies are undone

Is all of this an elaborate attempt to create "plausible deniability" should you ever be discovered to have browsed through OnlyBigDicks.com?

That's quite an old pic, anyway. Like I say, the penicillin worked a treat, and I no longer look like I've recently made savoury love to a butter churn. And the guy licking my salty love-cheddar has since died of an unrelated lip-disease of the lips and face, so if you guys don't mind I'd like to honour his memory by holding a minute's penis.

And for the record, smegma is rich in essential salts and cheesiness, and you're doing your children a great disservice by keeping such naturally cultured and healthy yummies from their tight virgin mouths and/or anuses. Plus if they use their choppers to scrape it off my patented cock-cheese delivery tool it helps fight tooth decay and gives their breath a warm, musky freshness that'll linger for weeks. With all of this in mind, by NOT letting me work your kids over you're actually committing child abuse. I'll leave you with that thought while I browse through the rest of Blitz's favourite website - onlybigdicks.com.

never had dick cheese, but I used to have pube cheese.

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I used to have an unsophisticated palette like yours, but once you go cock you never go...ba'ock.

Haha. Flies? How many fucking zippers do you have on your pants?

NO! Why the fuck would you say that? I came across that site purely by accident when I was looking up a brand of Gouda made by a company called "Dick's". I swear

Haha wow... you have just outdone every other disgusting post you made since you joined Congratulations. That one will be difficult to surpass haha

Palate*

A "palette" is what a painter uses

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Are you finished? Are you done? Oh...as long as you're done picking apart my posts like the pedantic, sadistic boarding school teacher that you are we can get back to talking about smegma and the soiling of children with said cheddarification

LEAVE ME BE'S! MWAAAAAAAAAA!

Ahh you're not a bad lad

Haha. We'll get back on topic once you're ready to type and spell properly, young man.

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I BEFORE E EXCEPT AFTER C, UNLESS PRONOUNCED "EH" AS IN "NEIGHBOUR" AND "WEIGH"!

FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK YOOOOOOOOOOOOOU turkey fucker!

Fuckfuckfuck fuckOFFFFFFF! FuckOFFFFFFFFFF! Fuckfuckfuck fuckOFFFFFF!

Nobody is really interested in your Christmas morning traditions Paddy

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Tell me about it, my "Yule Log Digger" videos are selling worse than Heath Ledger's new signature aftershave.

"Hangin' the Mistletoe" in technicolor was not what I expected at all.

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Hahahaha.

The director's cut is coming out on Blu-ray this month, so reserve judgement until you see it! My commentary is especially interesting - the entire commentary track consists of a wet, rapid, rhythmic rubbing sound produced by me and my penis. Every 2:30mins you'll hear a groan, some weeping and the rustling of Kleenex.

Haha

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You can't fool this kid. I know you just recorded the dog drinking out of it's waterdish and then your dismay as you had to clean it up when it spilled.

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A freshly-fisted dog is a little unsteady on its feet, so it's understandable that it'd be a little clumsy with its water dish. But my rubber carpet needs to be talcum powdered every time there's a spill, and I'm not made of fuckin' talcum powder! I'm made from gurgling frog spawn and bits of old cloth. At least, that's what my home-made robot doctor told me.

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Looks like this syphilis has been eating through more than just my reproductive system.

OR

I CUM TERMITES!

Relations to CC ALWAYS win

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"I got wood"

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" BOB_ZE fucked a cat in this house"

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I got my first period!

He tried to touch me. I burned him!

Call me a midget and I'll burn your house down, too.

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Haha!

I'll have to show that photo to my parents. The kid looks so much like my sister it's unbelievable.

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...can you put in a good word for me?

Haha...

No.

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Warning: self-realization may produce nausea and vomiting

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Hahaha! Good one

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"Are you sure this "bulimia technique" is effective? So far I don't feel skinny. ..."

Haha another good one!

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Another one.

http://img188.imageshack.us/img188/...a44c981f191.jpg

Go for it!

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Muppet Show MTV-Style

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Even those guys from Deliverance wouldn't fuck this hog.

ok I'm not gonna attempt this, but she seriously looks like my lunch lady from high school and I'm really disturbed

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Haha that`d be badass! Print it and show it to her

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Hahaha yeah, and say "I'll be making 1,000 copies of this and pasting them all over the school unless you start giving me extra pudding (definitely not a euphemism in this case)".

Haha!

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these 2 beauties were taken by me on a short city-trip to Chartres (fr), and they're screaming for a caption.

one:
http://img202.imageshack.us/img202/3531/img9806.jpg

two:
http://img203.imageshack.us/img203/1022/img9794.jpg

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"Okay you can open your eyes now, sir. The new front-less church boy robes, exactly as you ordered them!"

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lol

Same pic, different caption:

"Damnit Rick did you fuckin' piss in the holy water again?"
"I'm sorry Dick!"

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