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2007-02-03, 01:04
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Senior Metalhead
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: DM WORLD
Posts: 187
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Army Of The Dead
Okay here is another song I want some feedback/ constructive critacism 
Army Of The Dead
From the grave
They come to enslave
Coming to invade
You
Can’t understand
Don’t you see there is a problem here
Those people are going to pay
Ready to kill
Waiting for the thrill
They died
For it
Killed for it
The live
For it
The horrors are their food
Aren’t afraid to do the unspeakable
The banner of the dead
Waving in the wind
Blood stained weapons in their hands
Maggots
Crawling in their skulls
Maggots
Coming out their eyes
Maggots
Crawling out of their ears
Maggots
Coming out of their noses
Maggots
Popping out of their stomachs
The army of the dead advances
To the battlefield
Darkness approaches
Evil in the air
Disfigured walking nightmares
We want to spill some
We need to see
We will spill your
We want to spill your
We are going to spill your
BLOOD
__________________
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Infinity
anything to point out their hypocrisy.
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Infinity
He's calling you a faggot piece of shit because you are young and unintelligent, and most of all, you are a boring, stereotyopical, close minded metal head. Please don't pretend to understand anything PST says. Please leave the forum now.
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2007-02-03, 01:42
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
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I had to resist the urge to scream "BLOOD!!!!" at the end in a high pitched scream.
I wasn't quite sure about all the maggots, but I'm assuming you're using those for punch. It's not bad, but there's not that much to really hold my interest. So make the music really good and it'll be singable at least. It's not the best, but far from the worst.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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2007-02-03, 02:17
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Life is pain.
Banned
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Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Australia
Posts: 4,510
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2 words:
Klee - shay.
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2007-02-03, 13:16
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Senior Metalhead
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: DM WORLD
Posts: 187
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the maggots thing was to show that they are fuking dead but love the suggestions i will revise 
__________________
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Infinity
anything to point out their hypocrisy.
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Infinity
He's calling you a faggot piece of shit because you are young and unintelligent, and most of all, you are a boring, stereotyopical, close minded metal head. Please don't pretend to understand anything PST says. Please leave the forum now.
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2007-02-03, 13:34
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Senior Metalhead
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: DM WORLD
Posts: 187
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the new version 
ARMY OF THE DEAD
From the grave
They come to enslave
Coming to invade
You
Can’t understand
Don’t you see there is a problem here
Those people are going to pay
Ready to kill
Waiting for the thrill
They died
For it
Killed for it
The live
For it
The horrors are their food
Aren’t afraid to do the unspeakable
The banner of the dead
Waving in the wind
Blood stained weapons in their hands
Maggots
Crawling in their skulls
Maggots
Coming out their eyes
Maggots
Crawling out of their ears
Maggots
Coming out of their noses
Maggots
Popping out of their stomachs
The smell of rotting flesh
Out of their tombs
Going to slaughter
Their Flesh being punctured by the maggots
Falling apart but they continue to
Fucking move on
Graveyards empty
BURNING
FLESH
The army of the dead advances
To the battlefield
Darkness approaches
Evil in the air
Disfigured walking nightmares
Making your world hell
This is what you can expect
From the army of the dead
We want to spill some
We need to see
We will spill your
We want to spill your
We are going to spill your
BLOOD
__________________
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Infinity
anything to point out their hypocrisy.
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Infinity
He's calling you a faggot piece of shit because you are young and unintelligent, and most of all, you are a boring, stereotyopical, close minded metal head. Please don't pretend to understand anything PST says. Please leave the forum now.
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2007-02-04, 15:34
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Candyland
Posts: 1,542
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i would advise against using the whole maggot thing
and also the rhyming scheme kind of detracts the brootaln3ss of it.
try actually singing this and see if you can actually sing it in rhythm, ic an't imagine doing that
__________________
Quote:
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Originally Posted by BOB_ZE_METALLEU
are you telling us that you have 4 boobs...2 small and 2 bigs
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2007-02-04, 15:56
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Senior Metalhead
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: DM WORLD
Posts: 187
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The maggots thing is kind of weird yeah but i mean practice will help me with the rhythm
__________________
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Infinity
anything to point out their hypocrisy.
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Infinity
He's calling you a faggot piece of shit because you are young and unintelligent, and most of all, you are a boring, stereotyopical, close minded metal head. Please don't pretend to understand anything PST says. Please leave the forum now.
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2007-02-04, 20:56
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Candyland
Posts: 1,542
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the reason i say that is becuase it sounds like you have a theme for the song right? th eliving dead? ok so you go off topic a bit and now the song sounds like a song about maggots taking over the world. know what i mean? just stick to something,
__________________
Quote:
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Originally Posted by BOB_ZE_METALLEU
are you telling us that you have 4 boobs...2 small and 2 bigs
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2007-02-04, 23:37
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Senior Metalhead
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: DM WORLD
Posts: 187
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ARMY OF THE DEAD (2.0)
From the grave
They come to enslave
Coming to invade
You
Can’t understand
Don’t you see there is a problem here
Those people are going to pay
Ready to kill
Waiting for the thrill
They died
For it
Killed for it
The live
For it
The horrors are their food
Aren’t afraid to do the unspeakable
The banner of the dead
Waving in the wind
Blood stained weapons in their hands
blood stained
axes sriping with blood
going to slit your throat
Zombies
stabbings
kill us all
The smell of rotting flesh
Out of their tombs
Going to slaughter
Their Flesh being punctured by the maggots
Falling apart but they continue to
Fucking move on
Graveyards empty
BURNING
FLESH
The army of the dead advances
To the battlefield
Darkness approaches
Evil in the air
Disfigured walking nightmares
Making your world hell
This is what you can expect
From the army of the dead
We want to spill some
We need to see
We will spill your
We want to spill your
We are going to spill your
BLOOD
your carcass lays
knives
pucturing your flesh
know rotting
Stained with
BLOOD
__________________
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Infinity
anything to point out their hypocrisy.
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Infinity
He's calling you a faggot piece of shit because you are young and unintelligent, and most of all, you are a boring, stereotyopical, close minded metal head. Please don't pretend to understand anything PST says. Please leave the forum now.
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Last edited by HAMMERSMASHEDFACE : 2007-02-04 at 23:40.
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2007-02-05, 00:35
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Candyland
Posts: 1,542
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much better. still a very used topic though but less cheesy
__________________
Quote:
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Originally Posted by BOB_ZE_METALLEU
are you telling us that you have 4 boobs...2 small and 2 bigs
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2007-02-06, 19:23
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Senior Metalhead
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Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: DM WORLD
Posts: 187
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Infinity
2 words:
Klee - shay.
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one smilie 
__________________
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Infinity
anything to point out their hypocrisy.
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Infinity
He's calling you a faggot piece of shit because you are young and unintelligent, and most of all, you are a boring, stereotyopical, close minded metal head. Please don't pretend to understand anything PST says. Please leave the forum now.
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2007-02-21, 20:44
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MotörCat
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Join Date: Oct 2002
Location: 昔昔
Posts: 7,547
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pretty much old school lyrics,
Quote:
We want to spill some
We need to see
We will spill your
We want to spill your
We are going to spill your
blood
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that part definitally should be sung by the misfits heh
__________________
POW MIA NEVER FORGOTTEN
no one can tell you to turn down your amp unless they're of higher skill or in your band
Why not make shit up as we go-fox
Ok. You're literate, intelligent and funny-FBS
"Calm down, Edgar back in your cage"-far beyond sane
"you suck the cat-avatar-guy doesnt"-The Doc
Now My Legacy Shall Live Forever!!
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2007-02-21, 21:33
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Senior Metalhead
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Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Hell
Posts: 269
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Needs more maggots in it.
__________________
CompelledToLacerate because of his sweaty balls and Simpsons dissing.
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