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2002-09-10, 10:31
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The Devil
Alumni Staff
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Banging your girlfriend.
Posts: 2,541
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Sounds like it could be some kind of story.....but you need to brush up on your writing skills. The whole thing sounds like you're talking to me about it, not like i'm reading it off a page.
"for about 10 minutes"
Using language like this in a song/story is very.....uh, bad. 
__________________
Through me you pass into the city of woe
Through me you pass into eternal pain
Through me among the people lost for ay
Justice the founder of my fabric moved
To rear me was the task of power divine
Supremest wisdom, and primeval love
Before me things create were none, save things
Eternal, and eternal I endure
All hope abandon, ye who enter here
Against the concert of the Immortals he cannot stand alone.
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