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2006-04-04, 04:31
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,136
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"Suckerpunch"
"Suckerpunch"
4/3/2006
Jacob Fitzlaff
The blood runs in the gutter,
You'll never know your name!
Another paint by number,
But they've erased your face!
You're numbered one-nine-eight-four,
And you'll never know your name.
They've painted all the numbers,
But the color stayed the same!
Suckerpunch!
Suckerpunch!
Suckerpunch!
Suckerpunch!
We'll break down their doors,
And destroy their locks.
Out come the wolves,
To feast on the flocks.
__________________
Worker bees can leave,
Even drones can fly away.
The queen is their slave.
www.maddox.xmission.com
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2006-04-04, 07:34
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: providence
Posts: 1,863
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the last four lines are killer
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2006-04-04, 07:59
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Post-whore
Banned
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Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Sydney, Aus
Posts: 2,037
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Sounds like a punk song, and yes, the last 4 lines are awesome.
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2006-04-04, 11:33
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
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When I see you post something I get scared.  Very painful sounding piece, but has a punch of emotion. You should come up with some mad bass licks for this if you haven't already.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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2006-04-04, 12:40
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Quantum.
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Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 2,149
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Just curious, is the choice of the number purely co-incidentel or are they part of the message?
__________________
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal
"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan
"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
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2006-04-04, 17:56
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,136
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
When I see you post something I get scared. Very painful sounding piece, but has a punch of emotion. You should come up with some mad bass licks for this if you haven't already. |
Will do.
And yeah, it's a reference to 1984 by George Orwell.
__________________
Worker bees can leave,
Even drones can fly away.
The queen is their slave.
www.maddox.xmission.com
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2006-04-04, 18:49
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Quantum.
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Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 2,149
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I was hoping it did. Those last four lines were not bad, but for me, that reference did the song. PST himself once said that one of the aims with poetry is to capture as much meaning as possible in as few words as possible...
Perhaps a dirty trick, but I got to hand it to you, it DID the trick.
__________________
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal
"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan
"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
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2006-04-04, 22:09
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,136
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by problematic
Sounds like a punk song, and yes, the last 4 lines are awesome.
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Yeah it is a punk song.
Funny part is, the 1984 reference was a spontaneous thing. It just happened. But that is how all the best things are. And hey, sometimes you have to fight dirty
__________________
Worker bees can leave,
Even drones can fly away.
The queen is their slave.
www.maddox.xmission.com
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