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2005-09-21, 21:47
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New Blood
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Canada eh
Posts: 22
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Chokehold Amnesia
I refuse to take you in
You can stay in the rain to drown
There's no way in and I hate the sun
Society is thousands in one more fucking man down
I'll hang you before I look for you again
I'm smelting my thoughts into one
I'm proud to be "pure" and "fair" in here
But nobody's like that out under the sun
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2005-09-21, 23:39
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New Blood
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Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Take Her Down To The River
Posts: 18
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Awesome, really enjoyed the read.
Quick and it flowed really well
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Denny Crane is CooCoo for CocoaPuffs
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2005-09-22, 00:14
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
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I didn't quite get the first line in the second verse, but the line after that was a pretty cool image. It wasn't bad. It just didn't have enough for me to grab onto. Not a big deal though. I'm just one person.
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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2005-09-22, 00:40
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New Blood
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Canada eh
Posts: 22
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Heh, ya, it's really a mixture of thoughts. Things about identity (though the references to myself are subtle and cryptic), response to the future of society and things. Probably would be cool with some technical progressive stuff.
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2005-09-22, 01:08
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
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Well, if they're really cryptic and you decide it's a keeper you might want to make some notes with it just so you remember them a few years down the road. 
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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2005-09-22, 01:20
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New Blood
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Canada eh
Posts: 22
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Well, I like the other song I posted better. But noone's commenting... 
Poor Kraf lacks the attention to feed his ridiculous and other world inhabiting song writing ego... |
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2005-09-22, 02:10
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
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Well, write a song about that!!!  I would.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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