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2005-08-04, 16:33
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,136
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"The Day My Scrotum Flew Away"
"The Day My Scrotum Flew Away"
Jacob Fitzlaff
Today was a sad day, yes indeed.
Today my scrotum decided to leave.
Today was miserable to say the least,
It was today that my scrotum sprouted wings and feet.
My day was ruined, to put it frankly.
Ther goes my plans for some hanky-panky.
Make no mistake, I was taken with grief.
I really didn't want my scrotum to leave.
Through my house, my scrotum did fly.
In fact, it almost hit my mom in her eye.
I chased it around for nearly an hour.
I chased it to the top of the grim northern tower.
But I got terribly hot running that midsummer.
So I cracked open a window, like the crack on a plumber.
My scrotum didn't heisitate to take the chance.
It took to the sky! Testicular romance!
And so it was to my dismay.
My scortum up and flew away.
Although it may seem comical to some.
Just remember, that isn't the sun.
__________________
Worker bees can leave,
Even drones can fly away.
The queen is their slave.
www.maddox.xmission.com
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2005-08-04, 17:02
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
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You're going to be horrible by the time you're 40 if you're writing like this at 15. Cool. 
The imagery in this was so funny. If you could get a video with 3-D that would be great. the only part I wasn't sure about was Testicular romance? That sounded forced. (Would that be rape in this instance?) lol You could have called it "Rape of the Sky" and people would think it was a metal song. And if you say it fast they'll think it's "Rape of This Guy."
You're a nut. 
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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2005-08-04, 17:16
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,136
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The testicular romance is to illustrate the beauty of seeing one's scrotum fly into the clouds.
3-D video?  And I didn't want it to be a metal song. I've been listening to way to much Primus and Rush recently to write a metal song.
__________________
Worker bees can leave,
Even drones can fly away.
The queen is their slave.
www.maddox.xmission.com
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2005-08-04, 17:28
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
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Thanks for the clarification. I can see you being on the Bob and Tom show in a few years.
Weird you should say those 2 because I was thinking South Park when I read this. And when you were talking about Rush I was thinking of the only episode I've seen of Trailer Park Boys or whatever it's called where they do the kidnapping.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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2005-08-04, 17:40
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 4,723
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Erm..wow. That was shit |
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2005-08-04, 17:44
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
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He's gonna write a sequel called "Weiner, Where Art Thou?"
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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2005-08-04, 17:51
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,136
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Thanks for the idea
__________________
Worker bees can leave,
Even drones can fly away.
The queen is their slave.
www.maddox.xmission.com
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2005-08-04, 19:43
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Naples, FL
Posts: 1,916
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Brilliant. Absolutely Brilliant.  |
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2005-08-04, 21:26
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Alabama
Posts: 1,942
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HAHAHA!
Very few things have ever made me bust out laughing over the internet,but that was classic.
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2005-08-04, 21:33
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slack as fuck
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Goddamn maritimes..
Posts: 3,395
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think you're fuckin funny don't ya?
well you are. fucking brilliant 
__________________
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Soulinsane
Bottle of Vodka, $25
Fucking on the couch while posting on Metaltabs and getting caught by your mother....
Priceless! |
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2005-08-04, 21:52
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Pirate Lawd
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: Hanger 18
Posts: 6,520
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That was the best thing I've ever read |
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2005-08-04, 22:13
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Senior Metalhead
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Hampshire , Uk
Posts: 159
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my hat goes off to ya
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The female necrophiliac wants her money back
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2005-08-04, 23:25
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HES BAAACK
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: slaying all the giants
Posts: 9,967
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that was hilarious
__________________
www.myspace.com/crownedmusic
http://i79.photobucket.com/albums/j136/transient_shirts/Banner.gif
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2005-08-05, 21:15
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by active corpse fucker
my hat goes off to ya |
Well, while it's off, try to catch his scrotum when it flies by.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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2005-08-05, 21:40
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,136
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I would apprieciate that
Edit: Just noticed I had a five star rating. Cool.
__________________
Worker bees can leave,
Even drones can fly away.
The queen is their slave.
www.maddox.xmission.com
Last edited by Tulvox : 2005-08-05 at 21:51.
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2005-08-06, 00:38
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
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'tard.
EDIT:
There are you happy now?
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
Last edited by L,B'XXX : 2005-08-06 at 14:01.
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2005-08-06, 03:38
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,136
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You forgot the damn smiley. Old people... 
__________________
Worker bees can leave,
Even drones can fly away.
The queen is their slave.
www.maddox.xmission.com
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2005-08-06, 14:18
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Post-whore
Banned
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Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Sydney, Aus
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Most of the comments in this thread sounded very forced 
It's not that funny. |
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2005-08-06, 15:30
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Senior Metalhead
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Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: The Shire
Posts: 363
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that was great.
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2005-08-06, 17:53
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Supreme Metalhead
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Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Belgium
Posts: 722
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Awesome. I'm looking forward to your next lines. |
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2005-09-11, 21:28
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New Blood
Banned
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Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 15
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Grim northern tower! Ha!
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2005-09-12, 00:39
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The Stings of Conscience
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: Lutz, FL
Posts: 2,245
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Funny, but it would be a lot more funny if you posted a sample of yourself singing it. Come on pussy, do it.
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2005-09-12, 03:04
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Supreme Metalhead
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: your pants
Posts: 963
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by problematic
Most of the comments in this thread sounded very forced
It's not that funny. |
suck a dick!!!!
i <3 tulvox  |
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2005-09-16, 14:13
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I am a tax on the world..
Forum Leader
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: pizza with a shit on it!
Posts: 7,994
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Hahaha.
"Through my house, my scrotum did fly.
In fact, it almost hit my mom in her eye.
I chased it around for nearly an hour.
I chased it to the top of the grim northern tower."
__________________
Man, I get real sweaty after I wack my dong. Yeah, cause I headbang while I do, and I can't really "Jump" (haha ) like VanHalen in a dorm room, so I just walk back and forth....haha a couple days ago I was jumping up and down on my bed, with my pants down and my roommate came in when I wasn't looking, hahaha.
This is my band's page
http://www.myspace.com/ferocitydentontx
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2006-02-07, 20:57
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My Ass, Your Face
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Michigan
Posts: 2,557
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It's actually a really depressing song. I mean, think about it. Your dick leaving...
__________________
A little section of Requiem's "I finally got laid" posts.
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Requiem
Wore her out before I could finish(which im grateful for)
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Funeral Mulch; My brutal death metal band from West Michigan. |
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2006-02-07, 21:07
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,136
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Jesus...I'm all over the front page again. Yeah it is depressing, but my balls don't stick to my leg anymore.
__________________
Worker bees can leave,
Even drones can fly away.
The queen is their slave.
www.maddox.xmission.com
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2006-02-07, 21:31
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Symbiotic In Theory
Forum Leader
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Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: England, United Kingdom
Posts: 4,306
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Zionist
It's actually a really depressing song. I mean, think about it. Your dick leaving...
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Not really, in theory your dick would still be there but your Scrotum (the ballbag) would have flown off..
Nice one jake, was hilarious!
__________________
'' I'll Smother You With A Fucking Pillow!! ''
Quote:
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Originally Posted by metal=life
Hey don't talk back buddy. Give your dick size or don't post.
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2006-02-08, 00:45
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6 lvl 80's sucka.
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Tallahassee Florida
Posts: 2,483
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Tulvox
The testicular romance is to illustrate the beauty of seeing one's scrotum fly into the clouds.
3-D video? And I didn't want it to be a metal song. I've been listening to way to much Primus and Rush recently to write a metal song. |
oh yeaH I forgot all about that detatchable penis song
cxool poem by the way
__________________
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Paddy
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2006-02-08, 01:23
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My Ass, Your Face
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Michigan
Posts: 2,557
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Yeah, I meant to say the balls, but the dick leaving would be really depressing.
__________________
A little section of Requiem's "I finally got laid" posts.
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Requiem
Wore her out before I could finish(which im grateful for)
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Funeral Mulch; My brutal death metal band from West Michigan. |
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2006-02-08, 01:43
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
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Oh, just admit that you don't know the difference. Maybe once they drop you will.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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2006-02-08, 01:51
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,136
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Ouch. Take your meds today L,B?
__________________
Worker bees can leave,
Even drones can fly away.
The queen is their slave.
www.maddox.xmission.com
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2006-02-08, 19:11
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My Ass, Your Face
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Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Michigan
Posts: 2,557
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
Oh, just admit that you don't know the difference. Maybe once they drop you will.
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I knew someone would say something like that. Trust me, I know the difference.
__________________
A little section of Requiem's "I finally got laid" posts.
Quote:
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Originally Posted by Requiem
Wore her out before I could finish(which im grateful for)
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Funeral Mulch; My brutal death metal band from West Michigan. |
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2006-02-08, 19:25
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
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Oh, you know I'm teasing.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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2006-02-08, 21:07
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Pirate Lawd
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Join Date: May 2004
Location: Hanger 18
Posts: 6,520
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Zionist
I knew someone would say something like that. Trust me, I know the difference.
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Is that because you are thinking about them to droping? Just and obsevation. How did you know about the question?
We think about the things most relavent to ourself. |
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2006-02-08, 21:31
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Post-whore
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 1,136
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Which is why you all posted in my scrotum thread
__________________
Worker bees can leave,
Even drones can fly away.
The queen is their slave.
www.maddox.xmission.com
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