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Old 2005-04-08, 06:38
BrokenCrimson's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Brisbane, Australia.
Posts: 1,023
Factitious Coercive Coitus

A lonely 2005 Suzuki M50 Boulevard,
Feeling the flesh that's between their legs,
Petrol rising inside the pipes,
A mechanical version of anger.

On it's slaving journey to deliver
An ungrateful master
to his orgy of consumption of organic matter
Inefficient, low energy fuel,
The vehicle buckles.

Rolling down the road,
a feeble fleshy creature,
damaged beyound repair.

Yet it is not yet satisfied.
The Suzuki goes into hiding.
Laying it's ambush amongst
Green, organic structures,
it waits patiently for
it's next prey.

Two humanoid creatures,
Inneficiently making their
way home, catch the eye of
our hero.

The bigger specimen is female,
a single mother in her forties,
and a youth, her son, of age 14,
Barely touched by his age.

The vehicle storms the unfortunate subjects,
breaking the youth's legs on impact,
and rendering the mother unconcious.

Laying on the streets,
feeble fleshy creatures,
soon to suffer a horrific fate.

The motorcycle feels it's fluids rising,
experiencing urges unfamiliar to it's kind,
yet, lacking compatible organs,
It is left to use it's exhaust.

The mother is the first to attract it's attention,
With many openings to choose.
The M50, after considering,
decides to assault her exhaust.

Sliding the vicious instrument in and out,
In plain sight of the youth,
Tearing the mother's lower body in half,
yet it is still to be satisfied.

Laying on the streets,
feeble fleshy creatures,
accidental victims of a maniacal machine.

The M50 approaches the youth,
The remains of his limbs satisfyingly crunching,
underneath the merciless wheels.
The youth has a differnt exhaust system,
the opening satisfyingly small,
the Suzuki proceeds to ravish the youth,
finding strange satisfaction in his screams.

Leaving the two worthless humans to come to their senses,
The vehicle leasurely leaves,
It's lust for humans ignited,
Searching for potential victims to molest.

Bleeding on the streets,
feeble fleshy creatures,
They will soon regain their concience.

I'm angry angry angry!
I <3 12 year olds.
Old 2005-04-08, 16:28
Chris Rezendes's Avatar
Chris Rezendes
Attorney at Bird Law
Forum Leader
Join Date: May 2002
Location: Alone here, with emptiness, eagles, and snow...
Posts: 3,567
I strung together some line like that not too long ago. I don't mean to ever use this, so I might as well share it. I call it "Human Wreckage".

Human Wreckage

Taste for skin
Music blaring
like a shot to the throat
Sweet, summer grass
pouring in through the open windows
The beast is starving,
waiting for death

Stench of lager,
mess on the dashboard
Miniskirt, tubetop
is all that it took
Like a busty siren
with a monstrous appetite
Demon riding shotgun
like birdshots to the temple

Pulled to the curb
Pick up the meat
go for a meal
Thirty bucks
Holes in her arms,
sunken cheeks,
eyes buried back in her skull,
like a demon possessed

Driving for miles
Dark, lonely road
Road to purgatory
winding through the woods
She clocks in for work
fumbling with the zipper
cheap lipstick
wrapped around the shaft

Intoxicated euphoria
eyes rolling back
skidding toward
Screeching tires
Crunching metal
broken glass
broken people

Into the dashboard
bodies melting
Bobble-head monster
into his skull
Twisting and turning
carnage machine
consuming the souls
of gutter trash

An Accura tomb
on it's side in a ditch
her head on the guardrail
Midnight crunch
Beast satiated
the appetite fed
Demon get out of the backseat
And admires his tranquil masterpiece

Truthfully, I like your piece much better than mine, but couldn't resist the urge to share my piece considering the parellels between the two.
Trust in god, he'll give you shoes!
Old 2005-04-08, 19:14
L,B'XXX's Avatar
dsnt trust ne1 < 30
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
Both of those are pretty gnarly. The bike one's a bit different to me, but I thought of King's "Maximum Overdrive" when the mechanical things all took over. This would have been from a more violent version.

Chris R', yours sounds like a paranormal CrimeTv story.

Not really what I'd read more than once, but you both did all right as far as the technical stuff went.
My eldest son's bipolar website:

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
Old 2005-04-08, 21:32
BrokenCrimson's Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Brisbane, Australia.
Posts: 1,023
Chris R man, yours kicks ass, that was my first try at gore, and yours is well rounded.
I <3 12 year olds.

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