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Old 2006-05-18, 04:06
Grimsweeper's Avatar
Grimsweeper
Senior Metalhead
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: vancouver
Posts: 102
good thread. the viking metal one was awsome.
 
Old 2006-05-18, 18:17
Requiem
Post-whore
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
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What would Chuck Norris of done
 
Old 2006-05-18, 18:39
Disincarnate's Avatar
Disincarnate
But why is the rum gone ?
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Keeping the Groove going and staying out of Treble
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^
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Old 2006-05-19, 21:27
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JOAMdude
Post-whore
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
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ohh....so i suck now i guess
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BOB_ZE_METALLEU
are you telling us that you have 4 boobs...2 small and 2 bigs
 
Old 2006-05-20, 02:29
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Zertonshfits
Post-whore
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Down the street from nHoE
Posts: 1,716
*POWER METAL

The protagonist arrives and looks at the dragon with a firey glance, draws his sacred iron broad sword +3, lets out an insanely high pitch battle cry from atop the greatest mountain of Holy Spirits, trades off fighting the dragon with his rhythm protagonist for about 5 hours and strikes the dragon down in the most epic way possible! Then he walks over to the princess, throws her on the bed in the castle, but can't seem to get his nut clenchingly tight leather pants off.

After about an hour of loosening his spandex with some Astro-Gilde, they finally come off. They start getting it on, but the pricess get turned off when the protagonist starts making higher pitched moans then her.

*DEATH METAL

The protagonist arrives and the dragon growls loudly and breaths fire. The protagonist looks at him disgraced and tells the dragon he sounds like shit compared to the last time he captured a princess. The dragon, sadened by what the protagonist said, goes on tour and regains his respect again because it was only the production of the cave they were in and not his actual growl. The protagonist tries to talk dirty to the princess but she says that all he says is "RAWR RAWR RAWR!!!"
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Originally Posted by IlikeRiffseveryone
im 50 percent irish and 100 percent pain. (SHAKE DOWN!!!!)


NECROTIC
Canadian Brutal Death (So you know it's good)


Last edited by Zertonshfits : 2006-05-20 at 02:44.
 
Old 2006-05-20, 04:02
newHELLonEARTH's Avatar
newHELLonEARTH
slack as fuck
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Goddamn maritimes..
Posts: 3,395
*GOREGRIND
The protagonist arrives and watches the princess get thrashed around by the dragon, records about a minute of it as an audio track, fucks the dragon dead, fucks the princess' ass until she vomits all over the bedsheets, rolls the princess around in her vomit, takes a few pictures of her vomit-soaked body, cuts her stomach open, pulls her intestines out and wears her intestines as a necklace, takes pictures of himself with said intestine necklace for his cd booklet, goes home, uses the recording as an intro and records about 7 seconds of music, and releases it in his next split album.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Soulinsane
Bottle of Vodka, $25

Fucking on the couch while posting on Metaltabs and getting caught by your mother....

Priceless!
 
Old 2006-05-20, 05:02
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Soulinsane
Pirate Lawd
 
Join Date: May 2004
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Posts: 6,520
Quote:
Originally Posted by Requiem
What would Chuck Norris of done


At least a triple round house kick into the dragons lair, all in slow motion with warcry from hell; landing a direct boot to the head of the dragon, shattering jaw and sending multiple teeth, blood, and spit airborne.

Of course, the princess would then be helpless to all but riping the clothes from him and raping him... but him will allow her this petty pleasure.

Thats what CN might do.
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Old 2006-05-22, 00:49
Rapture's Avatar
Rapture
The Stings of Conscience
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Lutz, FL
Posts: 2,245
i was unaware as to the age of this thread. someone posted a similar thread, and FBS linked here, so i came here to post my reactions.
 
Old 2006-05-22, 07:46
timedragon's Avatar
timedragon
Legio Draconorum Orkian
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: upon raging waves
Posts: 4,499
Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
* THRASH METAL
The protagonist arrives with a bottle of Jack Daniels, fights and slays the dragon, takes a scale off the dragon, sews it into his jean jacket, shows the new patch off to the princess, kills the bottle, and then passes out on top of her with his leather pants around his knees.

best. part. of. thread.
 
Old 2006-05-22, 07:51
Infinity's Avatar
Infinity
Life is pain.
Banned
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Australia
Posts: 4,510
Metallica Metal*

The Slay the drageon and find tref vzdfb

i had nothing
 
Old 2006-05-22, 10:41
Slabbefusk's Avatar
Slabbefusk
FUCKING HOFF-STYLE!!!!!!!
 
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Sweden
Posts: 2,550
EMO*

The emo protagonist runs towards the dragon violently screaming about how his girlfriend left him and that he wants to cut himself. The dragon gets offended and starts crying until the dragon finally dies of dehydration. The emo protagonist tries to cut the dragons head off but the sword isn't straight edge enough. The emo protagonist to decides to cut himself and accidentally cuts his own head of leaving the princess to herself.
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When faced with a difficult situation, Jesus asks himself, "What would Chuck Norris do?"
 
Old 2006-05-22, 12:37
*insert name here*'s Avatar
*insert name here*
Jono
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Sydney
Posts: 2,761
What is this shit?
 
Old 2006-05-22, 15:32
i_hate_nu_metal's Avatar
i_hate_nu_metal
Supreme Metalhead
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
Location: Whorelando, FL
Posts: 589
Quote:
Originally Posted by *insert name here*
What is this shit?


I asked the same question about the links in your sig.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sigmund Freud:
"Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar."


Check out my band's, (or lack thereof), web site.
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Old 2006-05-23, 09:28
Nihilist's Avatar
Nihilist
Dog farts
Alumni Staff
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 5,008
Quote:
Originally Posted by *insert name here*
What is this shit?

What shit? If you don't understand, I'm going to ban you. this instant.
 
Old 2006-05-23, 10:16
OpethFan's Avatar
OpethFan
Toast-whore
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Where the grass is green, and the girls 69.
Posts: 1,473
Quote:
Originally Posted by Slabbefusk
EMO*

The emo protagonist tries to cut the dragons head off but the sword isn't straight edge enough.


haha that was awesome
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BOB_ZE_METALLEU
yeah, one night he (BassBehemoth) came with some GHB and he put it in my drink, when i woke up....i lost my hymen....terrible


 
Old 2006-05-23, 16:16
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brainsforbreakfast
El Diablo sin pantalones
 
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Yggdrassyl
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *insert name here*
What is this shit?


What? Did you even try to read this thread? Dumbass.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Darko
Quote:
Originally Posted by Requiem
Why would you sig that?
Why not? Why would you sig me saying that I hate you? I was serious there, too.


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