Has anyone else noticed these guitar method ads you see on-line that claim that after one weekend you'll be playing your favorite song? Is it just me, or does it seem HIGHLY improbable that after one weekend some one can just up a play something like Nile's Blessed Dead or Cannibal Corpse's Bloodlands or Hacksaw Decapitation? I know these ad writers probably refer to Smells Like Teen Spirit or Mary Had A Little Lamb when they say "your favorite song" and even if some one could play Nile or Cannibal Corpse shit they wouldn't have the proficiency of an experienced player, but AHHHHHH !!!!! Anyone else feel the same?

BRAAWWRRR GARRR MFFFLLLLL!!! THEY SHOULD BE SHOT!

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That should express all my feelings!

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get your guitar and smash someone into pieces with it. that should solve your problem

Kill 'em all.

yea the ads and shit are pretty stupid and obviously a scam of some sort. I bet u the people behind it, cant even play guitar

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Most of them are 80 year old buisnessmen

Those are aimed at little blink 182 kids which the guitar work takes no skill. Thus being able to be learned in one weekend.

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Maybe I should just learn those kind of shit songs...being able to play three chords in any random sequence seems to impress alot of people who don't play

You might even make a hit or two...and get laid!

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all those punk rockers probly buy theyre guitars a couple days before their first show, then they come up with enough songs to make a cd, then they go big. its pathetic.

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lol! play 2 partial power chords and write a song that goes something like "i met a girl, and she dumped me, and my life is a total hell", and then cover some old song (like behind blue eyes) and since you cant play the solo, skip it and just spell out the band name that should really be whats behing those "get rich quick" books

I prefer the newes trendy method...take AC/DC songs, change a few notes/chords here and there, throw in lame ass lyrics that would make Bon Scott roll in his grave, play a 4 bar, 4 note solo and call yourself retro...and then make the big $

lol, i agree lets do it. we can get big and get as much booty we want, and have pussy mosh pits goin. then we play our own fuckin music, haha. no, i wouldnt do that.

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That reminds me of an ol' friend of mine...

I was jamming guitar (showing off) for this group of....shit....and they were overly impressed. Ya know that dust that accumulates around the pickups? They thought that was PICK DUST from shredding........

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I doesn't take much to impress most people...try playing people the chugging open E riff from Metallica's One or the main riff from Pantera's Walk and see how impressed they are...in fact play 'em like you're half drunk and their still impressed.

meh play a little 3 string sweep and they think you own jason becker, thats most people, but there are some that know at least something of what they are doing. but they people dumb enough to fall for that crap, are usually always into blink and stuff

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Haha! Fuck yeah! When I was in high school, I took my guitar to school with me a lot for extra practice in between classes and at lunch and shit. I wasn't the first person to bring their guitar to school, but the other kids mostly would do it on shit days, you know, like half-days before vacations, or the last day of school. I was the first to do it on regular days (in fact, about 4 days out of every 5 day week), and I kind of started a lame trend of bringing your guitar to school.

Anyway, I remember I'd play shit I wanted to play, which at that time consisted mostly of old Slayer, old Megadeth, old Anthrax, and Iron Maiden. People would constantly ask me to play shit for some reason. If I played anything I really wanted to play, they'd look bored and/or puzzled, but if I pulled some mainstream shit out of my ass, they'd think I was a god. These are the songs that I would invariably play at least 3 times a week-

Metallica- One
Metallica- Half off the Black album (Enter Sandman got played daily)
Pantera- Walk
Pantera- Cemetery Gates
Pantera- A New Level
Pantera- This Love
Deep Purple- Smoke on the Water
Black Sabbath- Paranoid
Led Zeppelin- Stairway to Heaven

I remember one time somebody asked me, "Do you play Pantera"? Since he didn't specify a song, I started playing the title track to the Power Metal album. He looked at me like I had just farted. He probably never even heard that song before.

Wow, sounds like my school. Walk into the band room at lunch and as you're walking to the door you can hear the paranoid riff being played poorly and in the wrong tuning (Gogo standard D) then of course someone breaks out the intro to '"Respect" (Walk) and everyone creams. Its funny because my buddy John is always playing in there and hes always asking me to play so I bust out a little "The River Flows Frozen" and everyone looks puzzled, so of course I break out the first few chords of stairway and everyone creams. Its amusing if you're in on the joke I suppose. HEY RYAN PLAY RESPECT AGAIN!

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Meh same at our school, but we can borrow guitars at the school, nylons though, and if you play some half-assed 12 bar blues style for them theyre like

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in my school its easy to make ppl think ur good, i was playing the riff on fuckin for whom the bell tolls and everybody thought it was hard... what if i started playing COB for them, what would i be a god?!?!?!

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I know this kid in school and for years I always heard about what a good guitarist he is. Last year I heard him play and I was thinking, "What the FUCK!" this guy was playing Ramones shit and Green Day shit...he played it well...but WHAT THE FUCK! That's good? And then he asks me to play something and I played some Deicide riffs and the riffs from Metallica's Fight Fire w/ Fire and Metal Militia and people just sat there with their thumbs up their asses and some stupid nu-metal chick was like "that's just noise and there's no real talent behind it".
AAAAHHHHHHHHH!

that bitch is a canidate for euthanaisa... god i hate the mainstream... except for wycleff john.

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that stupid cunt.

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I certainly hope your reply was not very kind. I know mind wouldn't have been.

Re: Undying_Hatred- HAHA! They fucking think the name of the song is "Respect"? I think that proves how lame they are MORE than the fact that they are impressed when you play it. At least the dicks that used to bother me knew the actual name! Well, except this one guy who asked me to play "Search and Destroy", which is a real song (Red Hot Chili Peppers), but he really wanted "Seek and Destroy", Metallica of course.

some learning methods are good. they're not really learning, though. troy stetina's books are good. frank gambale has a few good ones, same with friedman's melodic control.

u shoulda gone crazy on the bitch, fuck i woulda cut her down so bad if someone said that to me, cuz i know she wouldnt be able to play the shit. but honestly i wish i could play punk rock. all those hard bar chords :'(

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You know what's really sad? Ryan Perry most likely can impress some people.

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RyAn PeRrY iZ GoD!1!!!!!!!!!!\m/\m/

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I kinda did... I lightly tossed the guitar at her (which pissed off my friend cuz it was his guitar) and told her to play the goddamn riff!

Good job
Ryan Parry is my friend now.

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Ryan Perry????

this kid...
http://www.ryanparrymusic.com/index.html

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that kids songs have really stupid titles

im not so good at guitar myself, but i can make people get all amazed by playing the guitar solo from paranoid, and everyone goes "d00d how you play that crazy solo stuff man?!"

RYAN perry...haaaaaaaaaahaahahahaha!

SuNioj0369, you spelled Connecticut wrong for your location. You must not really live there!

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u shoulda shoved the guitar up her ass, she wouldnt have felt it, shes too used to anal fucking music anyways.

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If you lived here too you wouldn't give enough of a shit either to spell the goddamn name correctly . Besides, if a state's name is too big to fit inside the state itself on a national map, its not worth spelling the right way.

all metal rockers should start war with the punk rockers. kill them all

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We'd win.

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Most punks are Pacifist...

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Here in shitsville, punks and metalheads get along fine....sort of.

why fight punks when all theyve done is do more simple crap than us....

Of course we would. All we'd have to do is tear all their body rings out, and they'd cry. Then would could make fun of their stupid blue, red, pink and stupid colored hair, while they are lying in a puddle of their salty tears. Then we could piss on their Ramones and Dead Kennedy's shirts. This would be even easier if the punks were listening to what kids these days seem to think is punk- you know, like the Bloodhound Gang, Blink 182, Avril Lavigne (or however you spell it).

Of course, I am really just playing up to a stereotype, but it's fun, and at least I know the difference.

I agree. Street punk (oi punk) and poser punk (MTV punk/emo) totally suck, but REAL punk I like. Metal is still #1 though.

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hell yeah we would.

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hah, thats like stepping on ants

ramones are ok

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because since all they play is simple shit, so its easier for them to go big, in my opinion.

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Its just a different kind of music man

Hey dead kennedies are good, and so are alot of hardcore punk bands, i think the remones are pretty catchy sometimes too. But im a guy who listens to a varierty of music w/ metal as my key style, not someone who just listens to metal....

the only hardcore band i like, is the used, cuz they got alot of trippy guitar playing. its pretty sweet.

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............I hope your kidding, the used are complete crap.

hell no im not kidding, a couple songs have trippy guitar. since im usually fucked up, it sounds kick ass.

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I still can't get past...well...the fact that they're The Used.

after i heard 10 seconds of thier one hit song, i wanted to kill them.

Tru dat man, Tru dat Most of these fucking videos/books/websites that claim to teach you a song in a certain amount of time are crap....because it's usually acoustic guitar, campfire, motherfucking 3 chords shit. Like that asshole on the juicy fruit ads lol.

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Yeah,they do tend to come up short most of the time.

those sites use all of the classic marketing schemes to get you to try it. it's pretty funny.. if you want to learn how to market something, look at one of their sites and you'll be a pro, lol.

i just saw fret2fret a week or two ago. it promises that by learning their method of fretboar memorization, which takes less than an hour, you will be playing like vai, malmsteen, and kurt cobain (lol..). so i downloaded the program via warez and looked at it, even though i already know the notes on the fretboard well, to see what the hype was all about. it works.. kinda. in an hour, you know a story to help you remember how to figure out all of the notes. my guess is it would still take hours of practice to get it to feel like 2nd nature where you don't even have to think and just know the notes. that's no different than any other method of memorizing the fretboard out there, where it still takes a lot of time to get it to really sink in and work. the only difference is that you get a funny little story that is used to make the memorization more interesting with a mnemonic device. well, it uses a vertical aproach (ie you'll know all of fret 5 instead of all of one string), so that was a bit different than how i learned.. but it still wouldn't be any faster, really.

one thing these sites all pry on is the desire everybody has to do something great (like master the guitar) very quickly and easily. everybody wants to be great at something but nobody wants to dedicate their time and effort to becoming great.. bunch of lazy bastards.

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Of course those sites are stupid rip-offs. You cant learn to play guitar properly in one week. A guitarplayer who played only one week is nothing, hell even a guitarplayer who's only a month busy is still crap.

eh imo even 6 months or a year is still very young as a guitar player. but i've been playing nearly 11 years now..

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I like the Casualties. They are very agnry and fast. I also like the Misfits (especially the album Earth A.D.)

They are punks trying to play as fast as and grim as metalheads but not as tech or skilled.

They are both wicked good.


PUnks are kinda like metalheads in the way that they don't conform to normality, but that whole notion is complete BS anyways.

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oddly enough people complimented me on my playing more when i sucked

That must be why talentless shitlickers like Blink182 and U2 are famous

dont even get me started on coldplay

i know what you mean, ive been playing steady for 10 years and you see all these new users coming on here asking how to be faster, meanwhile they just finished saying they've been playing for "....a whole year...."

Theres a lot of things i struggle with still on guitar. Especially necrophagist, cryptopsy, etc type music, i could play them since im decent with speed and fingering, but if i stop playing the song for a few days its usually gone. Maybe because i got a full time career, training courses and all that other stuff as a mechanic... Just too much other stuff to think about.

Today i spent most of the day searching the net for some metal guitar lessons. I found one site with a few videos, but big deal, its a couple of tabs with a shitty midi file. I really think the BEST way to learn new guitar techniques is to have one-on-one lessons with an instructor. And its got to be a teacher that plays what you want to play... ie, metal.




Well i dont listen to that type of music, but i have heard it and to be honest its not talentless. Its just different. They dont need to play heavy, fast, technical stuff.
On the other hand, shit like whats her name.... ashey simpson or whatever, I watched this documentary on her on tv, and it showed her rehearsing before her first show, and she could not hit any note right so they decided to lip-synch it.... BAD IDEA hahahaha the CD skipped during the show .

Now THAT, is talentless!

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Actually, it's the other way around, people. If it weren't for punk back in the day, speed metal and everything after that (thrash, death, etc.) would have never been born. To get even more specific, it's widely accepted that Discharge were the real pioneers of speed metal. For example, listen to the Discharge album 'Hear Nothing, See Nothing, Say Nothing' and then listen to Slayer - 'Show No Mercy'. That's why us metal heads have to at least respect punk (and I'm hoping that you know the difference between punk and not).

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It's the same stupid thing everywhere you look.
What about exercise programs? Just work out 5 mins every two days and wow, you look like hulk hogan.

What about that stupid electric ab gimmick that does sit ups for you?

Everybody is looking for a short cut. What's the point having someone else take away the discovery of learning? Learn guitar in 30 days, my ass!

It's like playing a video game. Why the hell would you buy the game guide? Just to finish it as fast as possible? Well, now what?

The pro guitarists all have put in time and sacrifice to get to where they are, especially the good ones.

How did they do it before the internet was around? I would have been lost without the internet, that's for sure.

I'm sick of lazy bastards who want the shortcut and say they can play this and that. Well, why aren't you on tour???

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People need to quit whining and bitching about the mainstream band. Just because they feature talentless, simple music, doesn't mean its bad. The very fact that the average person (hence the mainstream part) enjoys the music means it accomplished its goal, to entertain. And hey, you gotta admit crap like Coldplay and Green Day pacifies the masses. Would you prefer to have every moron in the world listening to Megadeth, CoB, whatever you listen to? Be happy that metal isn't popular with most people, it gives it a sacredness that you should cherish.

Really, part of the reason I and lots of metalheads love it so much is that it feels like its something your own. It makes the music seem more personal. So the mainstream is really a blessing in a 3 chorded, beat boxing, sugary pop disguise.... for devil music connoisseurs such as ourselves.

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