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Old 2004-07-29, 11:27
ArkaneSoul88's Avatar
ArkaneSoul88
Senior Metalhead
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Arizona
Posts: 160
Unhappy Frailty

Frail skeleton laying motionless,
forever hollow and heartless.
A souless cage its become,
the fingertips slowly numb.

Mourning the loss of its love,
while slowly staring above.
Raindrops begin to shower,
as i calmly wither like a flower.

Leaning against a old stone wall,
broken and five foot tall.
The roots were grown in blight,
up around my bones of white.

Whats left of me still remains,
scribbling on the wall as it pertains.
Claw marks of lifeless cries,
as my decaying love slowly dies...
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Last edited by ArkaneSoul88 : 2004-07-29 at 11:31.
 
Old 2004-07-29, 11:34
Severed_Head_Stoner's Avatar
Severed_Head_Stoner
Gangster Rapper
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: The Jason Becker Monastery
Posts: 961
I like that. It has imagery.

Although the it looks like u struggled for ideas in the third verse.
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We live thinking we will never die.
We die thinking we had never lived.
Cut it out.
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Old 2004-07-29, 23:13
powersofterror's Avatar
powersofterror
I am a tax on the world..
Forum Leader
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: pizza with a shit on it!
Posts: 7,994
not bad at all.
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Man, I get real sweaty after I wack my dong. Yeah, cause I headbang while I do, and I can't really "Jump" (haha ) like VanHalen in a dorm room, so I just walk back and forth....haha a couple days ago I was jumping up and down on my bed, with my pants down and my roommate came in when I wasn't looking, hahaha.


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http://www.myspace.com/ferocitydentontx

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