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2004-04-18, 21:17
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I am a tax on the world..
Forum Leader
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: pizza with a shit on it!
Posts: 7,994
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In the Eyes of a Demon
I feel a great cold in the wind
Together as one body
And I shall rein this castle of thorns
Until the day we are departed
Oh master, where is your moor
My place in heaven below the clouds
Trained to feel your sadness of pain
I loathe for your powers of terror
Sacral chants and cemetery gates
Stand before my feet as I feel
Your flesh between my fingers
__________________
Man, I get real sweaty after I wack my dong. Yeah, cause I headbang while I do, and I can't really "Jump" (haha ) like VanHalen in a dorm room, so I just walk back and forth....haha a couple days ago I was jumping up and down on my bed, with my pants down and my roommate came in when I wasn't looking, hahaha.
 
This is my band's page
http://www.myspace.com/ferocitydentontx
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2004-04-19, 22:52
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Senior Metalhead
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Jax FL, previously lived in Naples Italy
Posts: 253
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Nice, it's very stream of conscienceness-like. but it's very cool. i like the part about "your flesh between my fingers" it gives nice detail. look for something about murder on here soon.
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2004-04-23, 01:09
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
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The only part I thought was a little off in flow was the 1st 3 lines. I played around with them a little.
I feel a great cold in the wind
Merge with me as one body
And I shall rein this castle of thorns....
I thought it had some cool imagery in it. Not my favorite of yours ,but not bad.
"Stand before my feet as I feel
Your flesh between my fingers"--gotta say it, but the ole man usually gets that way too when I'm bent over getting something outta the fridge.  
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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2004-04-23, 14:09
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I am a tax on the world..
Forum Leader
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Join Date: Mar 2002
Location: pizza with a shit on it!
Posts: 7,994
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__________________
Man, I get real sweaty after I wack my dong. Yeah, cause I headbang while I do, and I can't really "Jump" (haha ) like VanHalen in a dorm room, so I just walk back and forth....haha a couple days ago I was jumping up and down on my bed, with my pants down and my roommate came in when I wasn't looking, hahaha.
This is my band's page
http://www.myspace.com/ferocitydentontx
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2004-04-27, 11:39
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dsnt trust ne1 < 30
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Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
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Glad I could help out ????
heehee I'm surprised that didn't get a --fingers in ears, la,la, la, too much information !!!
I'm an evil bitch...... 
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com
-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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