Here is my first ever insert to the lyrical segment of metal tabs

Deep behind the mirror, a forgotten land thrives
Feeding off its splendour, a magnificent dragon lies
As beautiful the creature, his flame consumes the land.
Engulf (through his own desire) the most beautiful flower, in a breath of fire

Darkness is polluting the lake, but the creature is blind to his destruction.
Fire burns in his heart, its reflected in his eyes
For every tree spent, the smoke creates a piosonous haze.

Nature is dying, soon all lifeforms will ceize to be
the creature has destroyed the beauty here and
the lake of crystal has grown of poison and forever is to be
Shadows lurk in the depths, unseen but fealt in the wind
Now is the time to see the damage

Time has moved and the land is of ash
Now the creature sees all the ruin at hand
It is too late, now to rot, to seal his fate
He creeps to join the crystals at the bottom of the lake
to sink to the floor, where he will forever lay
The dragon has lain to res, but new lifeforms will
form again, never to experience his pain.
End.

And sorry if it sucks. But give me some credit. I am drunk and i typed quite well eh?

a little incoherant, eh?

"Shadows lurk in the depths, unseen but fealt in the wind" This is by far the best line.

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Something that 'bothers' me, and it isn't just this piece , but some that others have done , too, is when it begins like there's gonna be a rhyme scheme and there isn't actually one. It drives me f*cking nutz!! But that's just a vent of my personal opinion.

Anyways, for being drunk it had some cool images in it. You caught me right at the beginning with the crystal effects because I collect them. (I like shiny and prismic rainbows.) It took a couple read-throughs for me to follow it well. There's just something missing that I can't quite put my finger on. Maybe some of the lines just need rearranged or something. I'll come back and look at it again later and see what I can come up with if anything. Sounds like a pretty cool story though.

And speaking of --when I read your name and your intro I was thinking it would be cool to do a piece about a dragon in a metal setting. It was like opening up a Christmas present and getting just what you asked for ! That was cool!

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any suggestions are welcome. I know its not arranged all that well, and some parts could be better, but when i had the story set in my head it just seemed like such a nice tale. But the hard part is putting your great thoughts into great words. for me. but thanks for good comments!