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  #1  
Old 2011-09-13, 19:12
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX L,B'XXX is offline
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One Beautiful Moment

Got a little push into writing again. Thanks for reading and commenting if you do.

"One Beautiful Moment"

One beautiful moment
That's all it was
Fragile, I thought
But there was no room
For more than a moment
One beautiful moment

I didn't notice the stars were falling
Through the summer sky
I only saw them crashing,
Burning out, vaporizing
In midair, in mid-mind
In my mind

I didn't notice the leaves had changed
Bleeding the color of tears
Falling like they always have
Melding, uncontrollably
Falling like always
Nondescript

I didn't notice the shallow sea
Diving head first, blindly
I only saw the cool, blue water
Swirling discord
Near fatal fall

One beautiful moment
That's all it was
Fragile, I thought
But there was no room
For more than a moment
One beautiful moment

BJH
9/13/2011
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-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
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  #2  
Old 2011-09-14, 04:05
Hugozhor Hugozhor is offline
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I like it. Nice one.
Beatiful verse "Bleeding the color of tears "
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  #3  
Old 2011-09-14, 10:53
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX L,B'XXX is offline
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Thanks. I kind of liked that, too. I don't use blood references too often, but it seemed to fit there visually.
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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  #4  
Old 2011-09-14, 19:04
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Pr0az Pr0az is offline
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Damn good love the metaphors....
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