That is to say, I have found out that it existed not half an hour ago.

Why did no-one tell me about this before?

It is quite simply the stupidest activity that I have ever had the misfortune to witness. It consists largely of flailing around like an epileptic fish out of water and popping the occasional roundhouse (which has precious little resemblance to Chuck Norris's). Bearing more than a passing similarity to a massive tantrum, it is apparently performed at hardcore shows, where it seems entirely appropriate.

Words cannot describe how gay it looks. But fuck it, I'm going to try anyway:

It is so gay that whole parts of the Amazon have been deforested to provide fuel wood necessary to process the polyvinyl required to make its pants.

It is so gay that after the Village People saw it the first time, they gave up showbiz and trying to catch AIDS, all married women called Linda and ate a lot of beef jerky.

It is so gay that when it was performed near the decomposing corpse of Johnny Cash that he rose from the dead and declared "The Man in Black is now the Zombie in Pink, darlings."

It is so gay that new thinktanks have been set up by concerned governments to come up with a phrase noticably gayer than "literally as gay as possible", so taxonomists will have a way of describing it without growing hair on their teeth.

Those of you who are still yet to grow hair on your pee-pee places will probably wonder which stone I have been living under for the last several years. Apparently this form of institutionalised autism is popular amongst the young cross-eyed baggy-clothed fraternity and has been for some time.

In my defence, you must remember that I am old. You young whippersnappers and your INCREDIBLY STUPID, RIDICULOUS SQUATHUMPING fads which make you look like MASSIVE BLUBBERY OVERGROWN CHILDREN take a while to permeate.

If anyone would like to defend the practice of 'hardcore dancing', step up now. Please.

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Go on the coalition against hardcore dancing, they kick ass...

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This brightened up my day tremendously.

I hope some one does try to defend it. It will certainly be interesting.

What is wearing tight black girl jeans and a bandana at a concert in the mall without hardcore dancing?

DUDE, IT ISNT GHEY, ITS N EXPRESHUN OF TEH ANGST THAT HxC KIDS HAVE, CUS OF THEIR RICH PARENTS WHO DONT LOVE THEM

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For some reason, I took your suggestion. One of the writers is called Gooch.

Hmm.

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The "Hardcore" scene today with its dancing and haircuts is the most amazingly stupid trend to ever surface on this planet.

I find it difficult to believe the people who engage in this scene/dresscode actually think they look cool

I don't listen to hardcore but is it really MUCH dumber than standing around nodding heads, and some idiot swinging his arms in the centre of a circle?

meh.

Te point is theyre having fun. I've never seen hardcore dancing but have a good idea of what it would look like. Meh.

FBS: bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch! WY R DEY K00LA DEN ME!
thats all I read.

But your metaphors are great, haha.

Some idiot swinging his arms is basically hardcore dancing. And those weren't really metaphors.

You always get the odd hxc dancer at a metal gig.

You're a worry, child. I yell at you for posting random sludge and you get your little titties in a freedom-of-expression knot. Then, when I post something which admittedly might not be the translation to the Rosetta Stone, we get:



Anyway, you missed the part where I was fantastic. Go to the vet and get your eyes checked, and then wipe the skidmarks off your top lip.

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They rule, Gooch is a great name!!

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yes, its stupid and gay

hell, its so gay that it needs a thread listing insanely random reasons as to why it is so gay.

As least they mark themselves well as targets.

After reading this thread, I've decided it was time for me to stop hardcore dancing.

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Fuck this website isn't working, but I have a video you must see. Let me find it.

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yeah i discovered that website long ago and had a few chuckles and what they had to say

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Oh FUCK. Of course.

I owe you an apology, my man. You see, I keep forgetting things. Most importantly here, I have forgotten that you have never started any gay threads ever. You are right to criticise me.

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Yes hardcore dancing is funny as fuck, but I've found something at gigs even gayer!!!!!

I shall explain.
The other day I went to see Down,
Down the band were fantastic, great gig, mayhaps a little too much Phil ego stroking at times but he is a good front man and damn fine singer, any how that ain't my point.
My beef is with those twats who go down the front holding aloft mobile phones trying to capture video footage???? They get stroppy because people knock in to them and the footage goes all wobbly It's a pit not a paparazzi parade! One stupid bum treacle licker was even getting angry because his phone had got damaged!!! Rule one of the pit..Don't take anything down the front you don't mind getting lost or damaged(that includes teeth and bones!! )

Some twat near me kept squatting down to tie his shoe laces up every 2 minutes causing huge pile ups on the floor as people went arseholing over him! Get out of the pit if you wish to adjust your clothing, either that or tuck your laces in or wear cheap sneakers you don't mind loosing should they come un-done!

And finally. Don't take your bird down the front if she can't hold her own! I see couples hugging and snogging down the front! WTF!!!! I've seen people get arsey because people are slamming in to their missus and they try to protect them! My advice, get a cheap room if you wanna make the beast with two backs not buy tickets for a metal gig!

That's me done, I'm chilled now

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That just made my day.
I really think you slipped in that one though. Are you ill? It didn't seem to have the same pop that you usually have or maybe I'm just getting desensitized. Maybe you should hardcore dance with flailing phone books or bent metal in your grimey grip? Just a thought.

Dahmer--That was impressive! Sit down and drink a nice glass of water now.

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