I keep reading the title of that other thread about punch and wanting to read about violence. However, that thread is not only not about violence, it is boring and makes me want to eat barbed wire due to its pure badness.

I have hit many people. This is only rarely funny. The vast majority of the time it has been justified and satisfying, while being over before they start and of little consequence. However, violence makes strange things happen, and sometimes these make stories.

First story:

I am at school, a long time ago. Another child does not like me, and I push past him in class. He hits me in the top lip. I am very angry. I recover and punch him very, very hard in the solar plexus. It was well timed and the last thing the little fucker was expecting. He flies through the air, bounces his head off the back wall, and falls over.

And then he screamed. He SCREAMED. It was unbelievably loud. Uncannily, viciously, stupendously loud. It was like an air-raid siren. Like a Portuguese woman being raped by with a suspension bridge. The sort of noise you read about in the Old Testament.

The classroom instantly cleared. No-one knew what was happening, people were quite literally panicking, running around like maniacs, trying to get out, pushing over each other. You see, Shithead the Screamer had fallen underneath the level of the table so no-one could see him... and very few people had seen it happen, so as far as the majority were concerned they were suddenly in the London Blitz and just ran.

Suddenly the whole class is running out down the hallway, and this ungodly noise is coming from the classroom... is it terrorists? Is it a fire alarm? Other people start running too. Before long most of one wing of the school is cleared out, and crowds of people are standing outside the building on the grass waiting for the explosion. Panic is a bizarre thing. You could still hear the screams from inside. All from one little love-pat.

There was so much confusion they forgot to be unpleasant and biblical to me afterwards.

P.S. No arguments about who could beat who up, for God's bleeding rectum's sake.

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haha, thats some story. clearing out a entire school buidling with one punch

I have some violent stories, but I don't wish to share them.

Im an idiot, so I'm not sure about the exact nature of the thread but here goes:

Walking up the stairs of the english block and there was this gang of delinquents blocking the stairs. Everyone was waiting there for them to move but I just walked through, pushing one out of the way. I got about 3 metres away, when I was pushed from behind, hard enough for me to get a little whiplash and hurt my neck. He said "Fucking bring it on cunt!" So I grabbed him by the arm and punched him in the head 3 times. He was defensless because of the grapple. The teacher came running down, and I saw him, so I kept him in the grapple, and controlled myself. The teacher realised this and the principal belived my story [which is true] so I got off without even a warning.

i've only been in a couple of fights. Every one justified.
Almost got into one last night actually. I didn't have a costume so i painted my face all black. I was in the washroom of a club when some wise ass says to me "what are you supposed to be a nigger?".
I said "no, i'm me" what are you dressed as. A dumb cunt?" I think the guy realized he was being a moron cuz he said. "nah man, i'm just me. Sorry about that". Ignorant racists piss me off.

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i got punched in the head once,

one of my freinds was sitting with us at school and this girl came up and started to bug him so i said something like "tell yout girlfreind to go away man" then he punched me right in the head... turns out the girl was his sister



I could take you on with my army of kangaroos!

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mine arnt always justified.

one day in 8th grade this kid was bugging me. he was a small dude so i had no worries about fighting him. in class he threw an eraser at me, so i got the pencil shavings from the sharpener and dumped them on his head. he walked back by with the same shavings and threw them at me. the bell rang right after that and he darted out the door. I chased him and caught up about 4 rooms after. Punched him as hard as i could on the side of his head. I couldnt really aim cause i was running. anyway, he fell to the ground and when i looked up there was about 100 kids watching, no teachers though. so i walked away.

another time my friend was making me mad. doing stupid little shit. i was trying to shoot a rubberband at someone and he smacked my hand so that the band would fly elsewhere. i punched him in the lip and his tooth cut my knuckle.

after lunch one day i was stoned. three friends of mine were being assholes and kept announcing aloud that i was high. i told them if they did it again i was going to hit them all. they did it within 10 seconds. I decided to stick to my word. ran up to the first one and shuved him hard into a door. and punched the other two in the jaw.

after school some kid was telling me i was a pussy. i didnt even care but then he said im such a pussy and he could kick my ass. he told me to hit him so i punched him in the face. haha, he just said "pussy" with a jittery voice and lip. then he walked away. someone told me he cried later.

I know. not to exciting but thats all i got. i dont fight much.

in 8th grade some cunt on my bus was pissing me off so i stole his art project and threw it out the window. so this dude gets really pissed off and hes like "ill see you at the bus stop" and i just laughed, cuz this kid was like 1/2 my size. so i get off the bus and this kid is really gonna try to fight me. so i just stand there and the cunt hits me right in the side of the head. it hurt and all, but im a big guy so i didnt fall or anything, i just stood there. my god it hurt, but i didnt wanna hit this kid, he was so small. so i just took it. then he did it again. and again. so i got tired of it and punched him as hard as i could right in the nose, the kid flew like 5 feet and hit the ground. he got up crying and ran home. 20 minutes later, his mom shows up at my door, and heres the story she gave my mom

"Andrew was bullying Chris today. He punched him, and when Chris asked him to stop, he did it again."

i laughed for a very long time. turned out the kid had a broken nose, but my mom believed my story because im a really nice kid, i dont just hit people for no reason.

I havent gotten into a fight for years.

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The first time I got hit in the head... Well fuck I can't remember hahaha, but I do remember the first punch I thru.

I lived in a small town in Newfoundland, and my brother being the metalhead he was had ALOT of people who didn't like him, so this one time on the bus going home from school, this guy was trying to start shit with my bro, and my brother told him to give it up, or hes going to get his ass kicked in, and I was siting with my brother at the time, and the guy was sitting behind my brother and I, and he tapps he on the head and told me to punch my brother in the mouth, and I looked at my brother, and then looked at the other guy and punched him right in the nose, and I gave him the BIGGEST bloody nose EVER, I mean there was blood all over the seat. I had to of been 5 or 6 at the time, but FUCK it was funny.

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6 years old? my hero.

my hero

I was a wuss back in the day, hahahahaha. I don't get into fights really, but I used to have wrestling matches with people. This one time while me and a friend were waiting to noard the bus in middle school we just started hitting each other. It was purly for fun and we got a big crowd around us so it would be harder for teachers to stop us. We fought for like 10 minutes straight. I remember one good hit I got though: He had me in a headlock and I elbowed him in the groin really hard-I got some cool cheers from the crowd...

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I've only gotten into a real fight once. I was sitting on the bus in elementary school, and this kid who sat next to me brought his cousin along. They both were insulting me and then I told the cousin to shutup (oh, what an aweful thing to say, huh?), so the kid who brought his cousin along started strangle me and punch me and crap, and then I punched him in the chin once, and he immediately started crying and continued to do so as he got off the bus. The next day, I was called down to the principals office and they were talking about what I did. So then thoughout the school everyone thought I was a "bully" and the guidance counciler called up my parents and said "YOUR KID IS A SCHOOLYARD BULLY".

Other times people have struck at me I didn't do anything back remembering this really stupid moment of my life, lol.

hah...that ain't right.

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In my time, I used to be the biggest wussy, I didn't like hurting people even if I was on the ground, covered in bruises, I'd come back later to lecture them on their lack of honour and get beaten again... and again...

Anyway, there were a few occasions when I went crazy.

Grade 3. I was sitting at my desk waiting for class, and the dude who bullied me for ages was talking to the dude who sat next to me. The thing is, when the dude who sat next to me annoyed me, I'd pull his hair very very hard. The bully dude got pissed at the complaints of me pulling hair, so he got up, pulled my hair, said something like "How do you like it now, bitch?" and trew my absolutely favourite pen at the wall and it smashed. I saw red. I grabbed the side of his face with my left hand, pushed one side of my body against his so he wouldn't be able to move and punched away with my right. The dude was crying, it was really funny, atleast to me.

In my last days at that school (mid grade 7) I went crazy. Nobody knew I was leaving for a different country, so I bashed the people who bullied me over the years. I would use any excuse - the previously mentioned bully laughed at me when I scratched my knee during recess so I ambushed him. He was sitting at his desk, I came around the other side of it and pressed his head on the desk with my right, and elbowed his head repeatedly with my left. It took like 2 student teachers to pull me off him, but he never got in trouble for beating me so I didn't either. He bled from the head, and I was a lot smaller than him by that time, It doesn't sound funny but it was funny to look at, because I was absolutely bloodthirsty at that moment, and at that age I looked about 8.

I also punched a girl in the face at around the same time. She was making faces at me and blocking my path, then came up behind me and kicked me, so I turned around and punched her square in the kisser and left a blue eye. Her girlfriends were making excuses for her and trying to get me in trouble "she tripped over and fell on you", "this girl is dangerous, punish her!' haha. The teacher laughed and said that if anyone would try to beat me up as I walked home they would be expelled.

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This thread rocks Funny shit if I do say so myself.

I've got some stories about being hit and hitting but one really stands out in my mind.

In High School, my friends and I would get drunk ( not the driver though ) and go destroy mailboxes. We would drive by a mailbox while one of us held a baseball bat out the window and then WAM! Mailbox destroyed.

Sounds simple enough but there is a fine art to doing this correctly. One of the most importent roles is for the driver to get close enough to the mailbox so the batter can hit it.

Well one night the driver freaked out just a second before the bat was to make contact with ther mailbox and pulled away toward the middle of the road. Now I was in the back seat and the bat was already in mid swing when I realized what was happening. I had missed the mailbox due to the drivers error and hit my other friend that was sitting in the front seat in the head. The bat went through the side window ( which was rolled down ) and hit my friend square in the forehead. I thought he was going to kill me if I hadn't already killed him.

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one time when I was in 4th or 5th grade I punched my teacher right in the jaw because I didn't want to go to dance lessons I was sent to the principles office (what a surprice eh? ) and he just maked me sit there for like fifeteen minutes or somthing and then started talking for ages and then sent me out and told me to just go watch the rest of the dance lesson (there was about five minutes left of it).

There once where this two extremely annoing guys in my class and one day when they had been annoing my really much I just punched one of them right in the nose and then kicked him in the stummach... the other one just walked away.... they aren't in my class any more, they moved away. That made my happy.

Then there was the time when one of my class-mates was really getting on my nurve and like throwing snowballs at everyone and some of them had rocks in them, that pissed my off so I punched him a couple of times and then just walked away pretty angry and skipped next class cause I didn't feel like going there just yet. I just sat outside thinking about how boring he can be.

Then there was this time when my and my mate where just like pretending to fight and that got a little to serious and we started beating each other up pretty badly. Then my uncle stopped us

Last year when I was in 7th grade there was this guy in 8th grade that was always irritating everyone and had been irritating my niece (also in 8th grade) so I took him and held him by the throught up against the wall and told him to stop it or I would kick his as so badly and then the principle came and told my to come with him to his office and he started lecturing me so I explained to him why I did this and then he called in the other guy and started lecturing him also and then I got to go home.


I never beat up someone without a reason thoug. And I never beat up strangers I have gotten much more come down laigthly and haven't punched anyone since that time in 7th grade


p.s. all spelling errors where put there for scientific reasons and are actually well thougt thougts to test all your minds...

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CUNT

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/\ just like my signature says...

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dude your sic

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ohh shit I was hoping no one would find out about that...

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this happened when i was 12:
i was walking home with my friend and a guy who was just an "aquantance" in class, i walk with my friend towards the bus top, and then i walk home in the other direction. This "aquantance" follows me, i didn't see him at first, and then he runs up to me and squirts his fucking orange juice all over me. I punch him in the face, and then he grabs my glasses and throws them onto the ground. Now that really pissed me off. I get into a blind rage and go crazy on him, get him into a headlock and i must've hit him about 20 times, and all the time he's trying to scratch me. I then push him off, and he runs off crying. I think that everythings ok, and presume my journey home. I get home, and my dad calls me, "what did you do alex?" i'm like nothing dad. Turns out the little fucker ran back to school, and the head teacher took him to the local hospital, he got a broken nose. Next day theres a big meeting between everyone involved, and the minute he came in i burst out laughing! he looked like a fucking clown, with two black eyes, after that i just got a warning, and the clown moved to a different school within the week!

phew. sorry if that was a bit too long!

got what he deserved i believe.
One time at a show at this peace punk fag place in berkeley these wiggers were riding bikes by and yelling shit at my friends and I. Well, one of them stuck around and was yelling shit at me, so I ran at him and kicked him of his bike, 1 shot to the ribs from some steel toes, and i cold cocked him in the face, probably a little brutal, but i didnt get i trouble and i didnt kick his ass enough so that he couldnt run away.

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good old steel toe caps eh? i would have done the same in your position. today i was sitting with my friends outside this venue in camden, and these rudeboys chucked a firework at us, at first we didnt know what the fuck it was, and by the time we realised what happened and wanted to run after them, they got away.

These motherfuckers, they always like throwing shit from a distance, last week a group of kids started chucking bottles at us, we got a couple of them punched them as an example to the others. they never came back.

When I was in high school, I used to have impromptu wrestling matches. This was because I bought a toy wrestling championship belt from the 80's at a secondhand store for $5. I wore it to school sometimes because it was pretty damn funny.

Eventually people started challenging me to wrestling matches. At first I scoffed at them, because I WAS the champion and I didn't have to deal with such common rubbish. Eventually I started having impromptu wrestling matches before and after school, and I didn't lose a single one.

Then one day during gym class, we were having an open gym (most of the time we didn't have an open gym and were in organized units devoted to a certain physical activity, like swimming, weightlifting, running, basketball, etc). During open gym everybody just plays whatever they want. Well, I got a couple challenges, so we went outside and wrestled on the grass. I ended up fighting 5 different kids. The first kid I wrestled was a black kid about the same height as me but giving up considerable weight. He was pretty wiry and strong, but I was obviously stronger and more experienced, so I beat him twice. Then there was a kid who was actually taller and heavier than I was, but again, I'm more experienced. We wrestled each other to the ground, after about 30 seconds I got him in a brutal half nelson and he verbally submitted, I think because it hurt, but he later told me it was because he was afraid I would go too far and break his arm. It doesn't really matter, though. I still won.

Then came a couple more kids, both of comparable size to myself. For some reason, other than the first kid I wrestled twice in a row, nobody small was coming after me. These two kids were both a little larger than me. At this point my adrenaline is running wild and so is my confidence, because I just defeated 4 kids in 5 unofficial matches. Then there is the last kid. He is a kid I used to go to school with years before, but I don't think he remembered me. He was a bully when we were kids, and he protected me from the other bullies. I'm not sure why, he was just nice to me. He moved away half way through the year and I was picked on mercilessly (until eventually I grew a pair and started defending myself physically). Anyway, to the match. He was about the same size as me, and about the same weight, stocky and strong. We went to the ground where we exchanged several holds. Then I ran out of gas. He got me into a position where I was flat on my stomach and he was sitting on my back. He got me in a BRUTAL chokehold, he knew to use his forearm instead of his hands/fingers. Now, of course, a chokehold isn't legal, but these aren't even official matches. I remember the very large circle of kids around us started telling me to just tap out. They said it over and over again. I started to lose consciousness. Right before I would have blacked out, he let go. He definitively dominated me, but nobody really won the match. He just got up and walked away, and I just layed there, trying to regain oxygen. I thought for a few seconds I was going to die. It kicked ass.

I also have stories of legitimate fights, but I don't fuck around in legitimate fights. I will only post those on request, so I doubt I'll have to.

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I'm the same way. Except I hate writing fight stories over the internet. Something's lost, and replaced with something much, much stupider. Plus I've gotten to a point where I do my best to avoid a fight. Some are unavoidable, of course.

Some of you have had very terrible reasons for starting fights. You almost never have to hit somebody to stop them from doing anything so long as they aren't absolutely dominating you and leaving you no other options, and if you feel you do you lack imagination.

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a bit suicidal are we?

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yup, I think I'm one of those that has terrible reasons to start a fight... And I realised that a few of months ago that fighting is really no way to solve anything, I haven't gotten into a fight in almost a year

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i know im one of those, but they also robbed my friends the preivious week, after they bought weed from em.

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Yeah i remember one time now:

I was on my way to school and this little cocky dipshit just out of no reason comes to me and says:

- I'm gonna kick your ass whitey!

Me:

- No your not.
And i beat the fucker up so he ran away crying.

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you cant get into too many fights in this country. its so sad, im in year 10 and some of the year 8s have authority over us. because we have so many greeks (also lebs and italians) at our school, theyll go around starting shit and if we do anything back, they go tell all their brothers and cousins and we get fulle jumped you leh my god 4 serious. but im generally a nice bloke anyway.

but some instances where ive contradicted that above sentence were in year 7 when i shattered a guys jaw. a cocky small cunt from my primary school was bagging me on the bus so i just smashed him in the face once and he came as close to crying as you can get without actually crying.

in year 9 i full on belted a guy in the face because he was an arrogant bastard. he was provoking me in class, and the teacher blamed me so i walked up and belted him in full view of the teacher, i was too angry to care.

this year i was going to get in a fight with a guy who apparently had some b0iZ and was starting shit with my mate. we figured him out and by the end he was like "please dont hurt me, im sorry mate we can work this out."

thats about it.

Well i cant say ive ever had to get into soo many fights myself.......I can always talk my way out of it or ive always got about 30 guys behind me ready to start help me. But i do remeber one time where a guy punched me in sydney and my cousin grabbed him and headbutted him then dragged him on the road and punched his head against the road. it was a very ugly site and one of the weirdest noises i ever heard wass when his head hit the road.

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1. holy fucking hell! if you punched a teacher in this country you would be expelled on the spot, simple as that. hmm iceland looks good to live in lol.
i have come extremely close to hitting my business teacher on a number of occasions though because he is an extremely annoying individual to say the least.

yeah i dont start shit, and i dont even hit back straight away, i tell the guy what i dont like about his attitude and if he still gives me shit, out come the fists. (well most of the time theres calm words beforehand )

I used to play Jr. Hockey in Quebec, and I would get into so many fights I can't even keep track. Anyways best fight I ever had was me (6'-2" 210 lbs) and the enforcer from a rival team (6-4 ish, 220lbs). Fight started out by me delivering a burtal body check/elbow to this guys face coming through the middle of the ice. Fuckhead decides its cool to smash me in the face with his stick so we drop the gloves, jostle for position and during this time he somehow got his righthand free and just started fistfeeding me for about 30 seconds. Now my helmet didn't come off so he was punching my face/my half shield which ended up cutting me for about 40 stiches. Once I got my fucking elbow pad off I threw ONE punch, haymaker style right on the chin. Dude is stunned, then throw the biggest left hand ever and he went down pretty hard.

Point is, I won the fight by throwing 2 punches and him throwing about 20 or 30. I got fucked up but I felt so proud after lol.

haha, you're what? 15?

deManu -> that's some good shit from the ghetto yo, thozza good drunkin stories fa in da hood. I bet you'de pop a cap up someonez ass tho if ya need ta?

On another note, I've been in a couple of fights and broke some guys nose. that was probably the worst, I was like 18 back then. so thats like 3/4 years ago. Oh and I beat up those bums like a month ago, I wrote about it in the RTT, but that wasn't intentional.

what a douche, yeah, concerts always seem to attract all manner of dicks.

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One time last year, I was walking down the street minding my own bizznazz and some dude comes up to me and says "whats up". I was like "nothin' brah". About 15 minutes later he comes up to me in a car and says "you need a ride"? I was like "naw homie". The he drove around the block and came back and said "you wanna chill"? I said "dude drive your ass home". Then he drove away and when I got back to my house....I punched myself in the forehead and it didn't even hurt.

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wait a second... that doesnt make any sense. You punched yourself? Meh whatever, where have you been?

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HAhaha M=L

lol @ m=L

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i punched a locker at school today cuz i was pissed about something and it fucked up my hand. im such an idiot.

Ahahahahaha!

I've never been in a fight.

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your alter ego must be a pretty peaceful place then?

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Ah it tis.

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can i come hang out sometime?

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And i remember one time where this guy punched me because i was wearing the wrong colour clothes and all i did was stand up and spit on him and he took of sayin how he is gettin all the eastside Bloodz. that was funny.

Def: yeh id bust a cap, But its better not doing it and havin 40 cousins who all love fightin and shooting people.

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I've never saw the sense in punching inanimate objects.
Other than maybe a punching bag.

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could this be because you don't have your glasses or just cuz you were so mad?

I want to hear some stories about members getting beat up! or does this not happen?? It seems like all of the stories in here are from the winners!! I will get back on later today, after I get beat up (I plan to get into a fight and lose!) and post the story, I don't have time right now because class is ending!

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i dont fight much... maybe thats why.

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there wasn't any pun intented! Basically it was just because I was extremely mad!

i both admire you and think you're a lunatic at the same time!

this one's a rumour but because it is such a good one, i have to post it.

everyone must have heard of a soapie by the name of neighbours. a gang at my school, of which i know a couple of guys (greeks and turks), attacked the guy who plays boyd hoyland, because he threw a bottle cap at them.

HAHAHAHAHEHEHEHEHIHIHIHIHOHOHOHOHUHUHUHU.

^ that is a cool story if its real. That guy is a real turkey and i wouldnt mind seeing him bashed. If u wabnt some good punch in head stories u should ask Agent Orange. He has some good ones

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Boyd! I met that cunt at a party a while back and everyone was giving him shit. his real name is carl and he got angry because everyone called him Boyd. what a gay name and a gay character! no wonder people attack him!

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I always watch neighbours I hate Boyd

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who the fuck is boyd?

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