MetalTabs.com - your source for Metal tabs
Home Forum What's New Submit a Tab FAQ Links Contact Us Link to Us


Go Back   MetalTabs.com Forum > Metal > Poetry Lyrical
User Name
Password


Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Rate Thread
  #1  
Old 2012-01-30, 20:21
Amadeus's Avatar
Amadeus Amadeus is offline
Quantum.
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 2,142
This point

Picture, if you will, this sleeping land
Ice and snow, hardly marked by hand
A lonely traveler's light
Eyes made sensitive by night
Eyes made sensitive to stars

The second to the right, or all in the sky
A meeting along a frontier of knowledge
From this lonely point in the universe
By the power of thought

If I had wings, I too would try to fly
These symbols trailing my hand
Wings of northern light for the solar wind
I do not know how not to try
__________________
Listening to Slipknot and cutting yourself is ridiculous
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein

Last edited by Amadeus : 2012-08-29 at 15:14.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 2012-01-31, 07:53
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX L,B'XXX is offline
dsnt trust ne1 < 30
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,866
Send a message via ICQ to L,B'XXX Send a message via AIM to L,B'XXX Send a message via Yahoo to L,B'XXX
What a treat for a first read today. It seems to bring in a lot of what you're all about from politics to outdoors to universal wonder, and then sums up your philosophy of fearlessness. I especially liked "Wings of northern light for the solar wind." There's color, movement, random pattern with intensity that's almost nightmarish, but so in tune with nature.

Was this written for song material or as it is in verse?
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 2012-02-01, 02:49
Amadeus's Avatar
Amadeus Amadeus is offline
Quantum.
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 2,142
Glad you liked it! Personally I'm not completely happy with the end of the second line (first paragraph), but hey. Came out pretty much like I wanted.

Actually, it was basically just a snapshot. I was doing a four-hour drive home the other night, the sky was completely clear and the aurora was in full display all across it. I stopped by IRF (Institutet för Rymdfysik; The Swedish Institute for Space physics, where I'm currently studying) on the way to make sure I got a few e-mails off in case I overslept and ended up standing in the parking lot for ten minutes or so. The lighting is very subdued around this building, for obvious reasons, so it's a great place for some good old amateur observation. Well, I had to wait a little for a file to load, and I just sort of idly scribbled this in a notebook in the meantime. So there you go.
__________________
Listening to Slipknot and cutting yourself is ridiculous
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 2012-02-02, 21:22
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX L,B'XXX is offline
dsnt trust ne1 < 30
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,866
Send a message via ICQ to L,B'XXX Send a message via AIM to L,B'XXX Send a message via Yahoo to L,B'XXX
Very cool you shared your inspired event. What if you left out the "Of" in that second line? It doesn't do anything to relate what you're saying there and it adds a muted word to the beginning of that phrase. "Ice" has a stronger sound without it. At least to me it does. Just an idea.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 2012-02-03, 08:31
Amadeus's Avatar
Amadeus Amadeus is offline
Quantum.
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 2,142
Actually, yea, that did improve it, thanks for that one. Weird how you can even feel yourself that you're not happy with it, and still not see something like that.
__________________
Listening to Slipknot and cutting yourself is ridiculous
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 2012-02-03, 10:06
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX L,B'XXX is offline
dsnt trust ne1 < 30
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,866
Send a message via ICQ to L,B'XXX Send a message via AIM to L,B'XXX Send a message via Yahoo to L,B'XXX
You're welcome. Sometimes all it takes is a different set of eyes.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 19:08.


========

Contact Us | Privacy Policy | Disclaimer
Copyright © 2001-2009 MetalTabs.com. All Rights Reserved.
Powered by vBulletin
Copyright ©2000 - 2009, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.