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Old 2011-06-08, 06:49
Paddy
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RTT #174: The Passion of the ChriPST

If you had to commit suicide, for whatever reason, what method would you choose? For me it'd have to be Ordeal By Jew. I'd go to a Harlem restaurant and order something fishy. The combination of being made bankrupt and dying of food poisoning would be a noble and selfless way of illustrating the danger of unchecked Jewdom.
 
Old 2011-06-08, 07:04
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Hey, you might as well order something pork and make the chef squirm a little, too. You're not thinking clearly, Paddy.
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-08, 08:33
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Minge. Death by minge. Possibly via suffocation; I've not seen a minge that can fire bullets or administer pills or take the strain of a rope-man combination, although to be fair I've never been to Benidorm to see Sticky Vicky.
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Red Sparowes - At the Soundless Dawn
 
Old 2011-06-08, 12:45
Paddy
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I'd quite like to drown in girl-cum, but not a straight forward drowning where I'm viscously hosed with it or simply dunked into a vat of it. I'd like to be in a giant canal-like structure with a ceiling and have the cum level gradually rise over the course of several hours, and it'd have to be kept at internal body temperature. I'd see if I could swallow enough of it to buy myself an extra minute or two of breathing space as I'm pressed against the ceiling, sucking in the last inch of air. I'd try and squeeze in a few underwater (undercum?) wanks before the big finale too, but I'd rather wait until I've drank my fill of the tangy honey drippings before that. I'm not a fuckin' weirdo, like.
 
Old 2011-06-08, 13:19
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It's a judgment on SaE that a ginger's suicidal fantasies mark a step up in general RTT quality.
__________________
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
 
Old 2011-06-08, 13:25
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Amadeus, when I see RTT I think of you. It sounds like a chainsaw r-t-t-t-t-t.
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-08, 15:06
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Quote:
Originally Posted by johnmansley
Minge. Death by minge. Possibly via suffocation; I've not seen a minge that can fire bullets or administer pills or take the strain of a rope-man combination, although to be fair I've never been to Benidorm to see Sticky Vicky.

Neither have you seen a minge in general.

Ey!

I'd like to die by having an orgasm from a BJ that was so intense that the vigorous sucking would cause me to ejaculate all of my innards through my urethra and into the girl's stomach. I bet that would taste offal.

Or maybe a boxing match to the death with Ernest Hemingway.
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Last edited by Dyldo : 2011-06-08 at 15:12.
 
Old 2011-06-08, 15:43
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Chris Rezendes
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Quote:
Originally Posted by johnmansley
Minge. Death by minge. Possibly via suffocation; I've not seen a minge that can fire bullets or administer pills or take the strain of a rope-man combination, although to be fair I've never been to Benidorm to see Sticky Vicky.
You're naivety astounds me, Mansley. Haven't you seen their secret, sleeper cell training videos where they pick up quarters with ease and eject ping pong balls at deadly velocity? What do you suppose they were preparing for?

The problem was allowing them to vote in the first place. I wish Artie Kendall were president.
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Old 2011-06-08, 20:10
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sheesh, has it ever taken this long for somebody to say CUNT?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2011-06-08, 22:25
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If I offed myself, I would do some drugs and shoot myself at the top of a cliff or building. That way if the bullet fails I can still fall and have less chance of ending up as a vegetable.
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Old 2011-06-08, 23:09
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Better a vegetable than a I can't remember what the joke was suppose to be.
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deadheadrosesmusic.com
i'm so bonery
 
Old 2011-06-08, 23:29
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If I'd commit suicide I'd do something extremely gross and splattering, probably rip up my stomach so my organs can fell out and then take a good nap of water in my mouth and then shoot my head off through my mouth. Thanks to physics and our anatomy the whole back of my head would explode. Fuck yeah
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C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
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R.I.P moe
 
Old 2011-06-09, 01:19
Paddy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JoeYngVai
sheesh, has it ever taken this long for somebody to say CUNT?
"johnmansley" is synonymous with "cunt". Wherever he posts thar shall be cuntage by default. And it's to his credit.
 
Old 2011-06-09, 05:04
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dyldo
Better a vegetable than a I can't remember what the joke was suppose to be.


<3 I'm not the only one.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-09, 05:14
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Oh, how to commit suicide. Well, that's easy. Strap a bunch of transmitting sensors on myself and then off to death by the cosmic gravitational shear at the very cusp of the event horizon of a black hole.

I also find it quite amusing that only yesterday a somewhat hysterical debate about young uns' talking about suicide on the net started in the political sphere here. Tripple-X, you're not taking your responsibility!
__________________
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
 
Old 2011-06-09, 06:12
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Hey, I had to tolerate my elderly grandmother wanting Kevorkian's number for years until I finally told her it was unlisted and she stopped so I'm just reading all the peepee envy going on as everyone tries to one up the next. Very creative to say the least, and I wonder how some come up with the ideas. I would like to think that all of you are stronger than that anyways since some have gone through some tremendous trials.
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-09, 06:32
Paddy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
Oh, how to commit suicide. Well, that's easy. Strap a bunch of transmitting sensors on myself and then off to death by the cosmic gravitational shear at the very cusp of the event horizon of a black hole.
Sagan's dead, he ain't listening. How do you really wanna die?

Quote:
Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
I would like to think that all of you are stronger than that anyways since some have gone through some tremendous trials.
So have you! I still have the newspaper clippings from The Ohio Turnip Stuffer case.
 
Old 2011-06-09, 07:12
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Good lord, Paddy! I was at the greenhouse yesterday and passed by some turnip plants and thought of you! haha (I'm glad I thought to insert the word "by" in that sentence.)
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-09, 07:32
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IT'S UNBELIEVEABLE WHAT NOISES CAN COME OUT OF YOUR GUTS OMG!
3 days now just gargling and bubbling and I dunno what. Fuck that's annoying
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C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2011-06-09, 07:58
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Ulcers? Be careful what you're ingesting. That doesn't sound too good, Gomers.
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-09, 09:04
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I'd go with suicide by cop. Rob some banks or high speed car chase and at the end just let the cops do the work.
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“Remember to live, eat, sleep and breathe music for the mind, play from your heart and never be swayed by the current trends.” ~Rusty Cooley
 
Old 2011-06-09, 09:08
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Sagan's dead, he ain't listening.


I know [he said smugly]. Being a Saganist means that type of remark merely crashes into a big, pathetic, stinking pile of "Yea... so?". Ha.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
How do you really wanna die?


Late.
__________________
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
 
Old 2011-06-09, 09:15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
Ulcers? Be careful what you're ingesting. That doesn't sound too good, Gomers.

Ulcers are famous for creating pain. I don't have any. It's just unbelievable how much my guts are gurgling and how much gas I'm producing.
I have way too many problems in my life. I'm so emo
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C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2011-06-09, 09:18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
Ulcers are famous for creating pain. I don't have any. It's just unbelievable how much my guts are gurgling and how much gas I'm producing.
I have way too many problems in my life. I'm so emo



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wRru7xBlWmU
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“Remember to live, eat, sleep and breathe music for the mind, play from your heart and never be swayed by the current trends.” ~Rusty Cooley
 
Old 2011-06-09, 13:34
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Gommers, you have the uberecoli. I heard that's how it starts.

I think I'd like to go out like this: Go to some bar or party and bring some slutbag back home. During sex just pull out a handgun while laughing manically and shoot myself, dying on top and inside of her. She'll never forget me!
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i'm so bonery
 
Old 2011-06-09, 14:24
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Just as a small addendum to the preceding RTT (glances at Chris) I thought this was both fun and interesting. Tighter budgetary rules and bank supervision - coming down hard on classic white collar crime - did indeed play an important role in this little sunshine story. Also, those Sweden Democrats - that's SaE mulitiplied by a few thousand and nineteen seats in riksdagen. Same old, same old.
http://www.economist.com/node/18805503
__________________
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
 
Old 2011-06-09, 14:48
Paddy
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His post count is currently 88 - don't encourage him to reply, it's too perfect!
 
Old 2011-06-09, 15:55
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dyldo
Gommers, you have the uberecoli. I heard that's how it starts.

I think I'd like to go out like this: Go to some bar or party and bring some slutbag back home. During sex just pull out a handgun while laughing manically and shoot myself, dying on top and inside of her. She'll never forget me!


hahaha I should not find that funny, but I do.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2011-06-10, 01:18
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Gomli
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dyldo
Gommers, you have the uberecoli. I heard that's how it starts.


Nah I don't have bloody diarrhea nor any extreme gut cramps that cause paralysis
Suprisingly the little fucker changed and now he loves to climb your nerves and give you epilepsy.
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2011-06-10, 03:24
Wolfsherz
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Just bought a new (kind of) monsterPC, GTA IV AND ASSASSINS CREED BROTHERHOOD CRYSIS 2 ALL OPTIONS ON AAAAAAAWWWWWWWSHITBOUTTAGETREEEEEAAAL

Also I fell asleep with my MP3 still on, playing this. Woke up crying. Awesome.
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So this Georgian Olympian runs into a bar

Aosoth - New album III out now on Agonia Recs
Epoch - bass, guitars, drums, MetaStasizing out asap
Asphixa - bass, demo out asap
Adustum - bass, guitars, full length out soon on XXXXXXXXXX recs

Quote:
Originally Posted by far_beyond_sane
Tetianblood? ... Well, 'Necrosemen' to you too. Twat.

Last edited by Wolfsherz : 2011-06-10 at 03:26.
 
Old 2011-06-10, 10:59
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I once fell asleep with my iPod on listening to Radiohead, and I don't know what setting it was on but the band right after them was Rage Against The Machine. Bulls On Parade came on and woke me up instantly. It was very confusing lol.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2011-06-10, 11:49
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drawn&quartered
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Going back to the topic of suicide, someone committed it because the new South Park episode was so depressing.

Quote:
Originally Posted by JoeYngVai
I once fell asleep with my iPod on listening to Radiohead, and I don't know what setting it was on but the band right after them was Rage Against The Machine. Bulls On Parade came on and woke me up instantly. It was very confusing lol.


I used to turn on Opeth's Blackwater Park and end up falling asleep about halfway through The Leper Affinity. Rude awakening when the next track would come on.
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Last edited by drawn&quartered : 2011-06-10 at 11:53.
 
Old 2011-06-10, 12:33
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I actually needed to listen to my mp3 players to fall asleep for a few years. Then my last zune died (it's what they're built to do) a couple of weeks ago...

I was actually close to building a slumber playlist right before it happened. I find certain albums to be unbelievably relaxing and help me drift off into sleep. Perhaps counter-intuitively, all of those albums are metal. A few off the top of my head-

Morbid Angel - Gateways to Annihilation
Sadus - Swallowed in Black
Pestilence - Malleus Maleficarum
Suffocation - Breeding the Spawn
Watchtower - Energetic Disassembly
Monstrosity - Imperial Doom
Destruction - Release from Agony
Megadeth - Peace Sells
Sepultura - Arise
Sacrifice - Forward to Termination
Morbid Saint - Spectrum of Death

I find that albums with a dark production work best, but those with an atmospheric production also work well, as do those with a lot of mid-paced songs.
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Old 2011-06-10, 13:05
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Quote:
Originally Posted by drawn&quartered
Going back to the topic of suicide, someone committed it because the new South Park episode was so depressing.

Whhhaaat? Source, please. Still haven't seen it though its sitting in my DVR.
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i'm so bonery
 
Old 2011-06-10, 13:24
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drawn&quartered
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dyldo
Whhhaaat? Source, please. Still haven't seen it though its sitting in my DVR.

Not really a legit source, just stuff I read on 4chan. http://imgur.com/DoS1f
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I dont have any funny quotes

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Old 2011-06-10, 15:28
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4chan.. a.. source?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Rezendes
I actually needed to listen to my mp3 players to fall asleep for a few years. Then my last zune died (it's what they're built to do) a couple of weeks ago...

I was actually close to building a slumber playlist right before it happened. I find certain albums to be unbelievably relaxing and help me drift off into sleep. Perhaps counter-intuitively, all of those albums are metal. A few off the top of my head-

Morbid Angel - Gateways to Annihilation
Sadus - Swallowed in Black
Pestilence - Malleus Maleficarum
Suffocation - Breeding the Spawn
Watchtower - Energetic Disassembly
Monstrosity - Imperial Doom
Destruction - Release from Agony
Megadeth - Peace Sells
Sepultura - Arise
Sacrifice - Forward to Termination
Morbid Saint - Spectrum of Death

I find that albums with a dark production work best, but those with an atmospheric production also work well, as do those with a lot of mid-paced songs.

I don't know how the fuck you sleep to that. I can't fall asleep if there's music on and I have to be either extremely tired or drunk to fall asleep with the TV on.

This just in: I just found out PJ Harvey is pretty cool. I always thought she was a black man when I heard her name up until about a week ago.
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Check my band out:
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deadheadroses.bandcamp.com
deadheadrosesmusic.com
i'm so bonery
 
Old 2011-06-10, 15:41
Amadeus's Avatar
Amadeus
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Rezendes
I actually needed to listen to my mp3 players to fall asleep for a few years. Then my last zune died (it's what they're built to do) a couple of weeks ago...

I was actually close to building a slumber playlist right before it happened. I find certain albums to be unbelievably relaxing and help me drift off into sleep. Perhaps counter-intuitively, all of those albums are metal. A few off the top of my head-

Morbid Angel - Gateways to Annihilation
Sadus - Swallowed in Black
Pestilence - Malleus Maleficarum
Suffocation - Breeding the Spawn
Watchtower - Energetic Disassembly
Monstrosity - Imperial Doom
Destruction - Release from Agony
Megadeth - Peace Sells
Sepultura - Arise
Sacrifice - Forward to Termination
Morbid Saint - Spectrum of Death

I find that albums with a dark production work best, but those with an atmospheric production also work well, as do those with a lot of mid-paced songs.


I'm with you on pretty much all of those. Though my all time favorite lullaby band is Opeth. Dunno why, I love their music. There's just something soothing and relaxing about it.
Then again, I'm blessed with this wonderful ability to basically lie down, decide "Sleep" and turn off like flipping a power switch.
__________________
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
 
Old 2011-06-10, 16:12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dyldo
4chan.. a.. source?



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“Remember to live, eat, sleep and breathe music for the mind, play from your heart and never be swayed by the current trends.” ~Rusty Cooley
 
Old 2011-06-10, 17:01
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drawn&quartered
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Its laughable but I really wouldn't doubt it at all.
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I dont have any funny quotes

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Old 2011-06-10, 17:12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dyldo
4chan.. a.. source?


4chan is a source, for many... many things.
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Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
 
Old 2011-06-10, 17:36
Pr0az's Avatar
Pr0az
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
4chan is a source, for many... many things.


Man 4chan is by far the worst forum I've ever seen. Amazingly enough how chaotic that forum is they can pull together to do DDos attacks. I remember a thread on there about sexing your sister.
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“Remember to live, eat, sleep and breathe music for the mind, play from your heart and never be swayed by the current trends.” ~Rusty Cooley
 
Old 2011-06-10, 18:27
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX
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I am so lost. So lost. Out to see. In a chainsaw without a forest and I know I should edit that, but that's how messed up and distressed I am. My old puter got heat stroke so I'm using dear eldest son's tower. I'm hoping its a minor thing or I'm going to just curl up in a corner whimpering and repeating- I should know to never trust electronics because they're evil........
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-11, 01:11
Amadeus's Avatar
Amadeus
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Posts: 2,149
Out to see what? Out to see what? Oh, and I don't know if this will make you feel any better, but it's us who construct the electronics that are the actual wellsprings of the evil, really. That, and out to see what?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pr0az
Man 4chan is by far the worst forum I've ever seen. Amazingly enough how chaotic that forum is they can pull together to do DDos attacks. I remember a thread on there about sexing your sister.


It's dark in there...
__________________
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
 
Old 2011-06-11, 04:45
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX
dsnt trust ne1 < 30
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
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Try the light switch.
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-11, 05:01
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pr0az
Man 4chan is by far the worst forum I've ever seen. Amazingly enough how chaotic that forum is they can pull together to do DDos attacks. I remember a thread on there about sexing your sister.


That'd be an awesome read though
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C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2011-06-14, 11:51
Paddy
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Wish I had a stalker like this:

NSFW (contains the man's uneventful gun-in-mouth suicide at the end, but it's worth watching even if you're a sissy)
http://goregrish.com/the-video-diary-of-ricardo-lopez/

It's an hour-and-forty minutes of an 18 hour video diary from Ricardo López, the guy who stalked Björk.

I can't wait to see Gomli's video when he finally cracks and starts sending letter bombs to David Hasselhoff.
 
Old 2011-06-14, 12:57
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
I can't wait to see Gomli's video when he finally cracks and starts sending letter bombs to David Hasselhoff.


Only two persons exist for me that could be worth stalking:
Julia Bond and Lisa Ann.

Killing Hasselhoff would be badass though
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C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2011-06-14, 13:05
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Chris Rezendes
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
Only two persons exist for me that could be worth stalking:
Julia Bond and Lisa Ann.

So you either love big, fake titties or fat, jiggly ass. I prefer fat, jiggly ass myself, but to each his own.

One thing we can all agree upon; a well known fact the world over, is that all Germans *LOVE* David Hasselhoff.
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Trust in god, he'll give you shoes!
 
Old 2011-06-14, 18:40
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Dyldo
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
Only two persons exist for me that could be worth stalking:
Julia Bond and Lisa Ann.

Killing Hasselhoff would be badass though

Julia Bond, really? She's so plain and, as stated, fake, and the only interesting thing about her is that she hasn't gotten AIDS yet. I think Bjork is a perfect stalking candidate and proved to be so. I'm wearing her panties on my head as I type this. I also stalk Richard. He doesn't know this, but I moved to NYC (the lower east side, where he resides, naturally) and eat in the deli he works three times a day.

I'd stalk Gail Simmons next if I needed another sexy Jewish chef in my life. Fuck me do I have a crush on her.
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i'm so bonery

Last edited by Dyldo : 2011-06-14 at 18:43. Reason: Fuck you, that's why.
 
Old 2011-06-15, 00:50
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Samuel L. Jackson
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Location: Hollywood, muthafucka!
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Muthafucka! Punk-assed bitch! The path of the righteous man! Now that's a tasty burger! Niebaum! There's some muthafuckin' snakes on this muthafuckin' plane muthafucka! Fuck you! Yes they deserved to die and I hope they burn in hell!
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If you can read this you're already dead.
 
Old 2011-06-15, 01:03
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johnmansley
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Ooooooooookaaaaaaaay...
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Album of the day:

Red Sparowes - At the Soundless Dawn
 
Old 2011-06-15, 01:34
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Rip Taylor
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Location: Washington D.C. & Hollywood, CA
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Samuel L. Jackson
Muthafucka! Punk-assed bitch! The path of the righteous man! Now that's a tasty burger! Niebaum! There's some muthafuckin' snakes on this muthafuckin' plane muthafucka! Fuck you! Yes they deserved to die and I hope they burn in hell!
Ooooh! I think I'm gonna like you. I'll even love you if you'd let me!

I'm so bad, I know! Somebody stop me!
 
Old 2011-06-15, 03:14
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Samuel L. Jackson
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Quote:
Originally Posted by johnmansley
Ooooooooookaaaaaaaay...
Oh I'm sorry, did I break yo' concentration? I don't remember aksin' you a God damn thing.

Yes Jon Venables and Robert Thompson deserve to die, and I hope they burn in hell! Along with the rest of those Merseyside faggots! This is some fucked up, repugnant shit.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rip Taylor
Ooooh! I think I'm gonna like you. I'll even love you if you'd let me!
You think? Cracka, we ain't got time fo' yo' thinking! They gonna blow up the muthafuckin' train, muthafucka!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rip Taylor
I'm so bad, I know! Somebody stop me!
I'll stop yo' ass wit' ma AK, muthafucka! Does he look like a bitch? DOES. HE. LOOK. LIKE. A. BITCH?

Righteous.
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If you can read this you're already dead.
 
Old 2011-06-15, 03:29
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Mel Gibson
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Not in fuckin' Israel, that's for DAMN sure.
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Sammy, how come you never acted with me? I've been working with Danny Glover so long that I sometimes forget he's a subhuman brownie, I'd like to work with some fresh black pudding for a change so that I don't grow too attached and drop my guard thus opening up my mid-section to liberalism. I just hope you don't end up pulling a Danny on me and shanking me in the bathroom for taking the last pig trotter from the cafeteria. I don't even like them, I just eat 'em to piss off Spielberg.

Rip T., Jew your way back to San Francisco.
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The Jews are responsible for all the war in the world. Also, they can't cook for shit.
 
Old 2011-06-15, 05:30
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Rip Taylor
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Samuel L. Jackson
I'll stop yo' ass wit' ma AK, muthafucka! Does he look like a bitch? DOES. HE. LOOK. LIKE. A. BITCH?
What?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mel Gibson
Rip T., Jew your way back to San Francisco.
What was it they said about lovers scorned, again? Haters gonna hate, aren't they Melanie? By the way, that's an ugly shade of BITCH you're wearing today!

CONFETTI TIME!
 
Old 2011-06-15, 05:30
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Chuck Norris
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Christ loves all of his children, no matter what their race, creed or sex/sexuality. I don't, however. I dispatched a wiry Chink in the 70s - just to see what his slope-eyed face looked like as my heel rocketed towards his jaw - and I can dispatch any number of Micks, Spics, blacks, Jews or Liverpudlians at my leisure with equal finesse and bone-crunching grace. So simmer down ya rancid mismatch of hilarious ethnic characters or I'll unleash a whirlwind of charlie horses - in your FACES.
 
Old 2011-06-15, 05:35
Samuel L. Jackson's Avatar
Samuel L. Jackson
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Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Hollywood, muthafucka!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rip Taylor
What?
You know nothing of my work, muthafucka!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rip Taylor
What was it they said about lovers scorned, again?
Scorned? You mean infected with gut-rotting AIDS? YES THEY DESERVED TO DIE AND I HOPE THEY BURN IN HELL!
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If you can read this you're already dead.
 
Old 2011-06-15, 05:58
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Amadeus
Quantum.
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 2,149
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chuck Norris
Christ loves all of his children, no matter what their race, creed or sex/sexuality. I don't, however. I dispatched a wiry Chink in the 70s - just to see what his slope-eyed face looked like as my heel rocketed towards his jaw - and I can dispatch any number of Micks, Spics, blacks, Jews or Liverpudlians at my leisure with equal finesse and bone-crunching grace. So simmer down ya rancid mismatch of hilarious ethnic characters or I'll unleash a whirlwind of charlie horses - in your FACES.


Oh goodness you guys, it's Him, I'm melting.
__________________
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
 
Old 2011-06-15, 07:15
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX
dsnt trust ne1 < 30
 
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Location: Home is where the <3 is
Posts: 8,881
I'm old enough to remember Rip and his confetti. Someone's boredom and lack of meds really created some entertainment.
And I thought Dylpickle's Dick confessions were funny. ummm nevermind.....
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-15, 10:02
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Ger., North
Posts: 2,593
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dyldo
Julia Bond, really?

I'd stalk Gail Simmons next if I needed another sexy Jewish chef in my life. Fuck me do I have a crush on her.


I like her tattoos and her ass. That's enough for me!

But come on Gail Simmons???
http://images.teamsugar.com/files/u...il2.preview.jpg
Fuckin weird man
__________________
C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
 
Old 2011-06-15, 11:24
Paddy
Forum Daemon
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 3,745
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
She looks like a reasonably convincing tranny. But then again, so does Dylan's mother. Let's see you Freud your way outta that one, cunto.
 
Old 2011-06-15, 11:33
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX
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I had to go back and reread that. The first time I thought he said GENE SIMMONS!!! roflmao Maybe that's who he really meant.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-15, 14:28
Paddy
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Old 2011-06-15, 15:06
Mel Gibson's Avatar
Mel Gibson
New Blood
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Not in fuckin' Israel, that's for DAMN sure.
Posts: 4
Quote:
Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
Someone's boredom and lack of meds really created some entertainment.
Man Without a Face never would have happened otherwise.

Quote:
Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
I had to go back and reread that.
It's nothing to be ashamed of, it's not your fault hicks can't read at the same level as the rest of us or indeed the talking sign language monkey from the movie Congo.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Speaking of hippos spitting out perfectly good food, my cunt of a wife still won't blow me and be grateful. Similarly, Oprah keeps posting on my Facebook wall that she's going on a 3 day fast for charity. I guess that pretty much resolves the Somalian famine issue.

Oh yeah, and FUCK JEWS. Blacks I can tolerate, mainly because without them the "buddy cop" movie genre would necessarily have to involve Chinks or Spics, and Christ knows I got no time for slanty-eyed bean-breathers with little wooden shoes and unkempt upper lips. Micks would be good to work with I guess, at least their massive cocks and perfect, chiselled looks would sell more tickets, even if they are a bunch of highly educated scholars and poets; damn those handsome bastards!

Sammy L. Blackson hasn't responded to my offer to work with him, so I guess that means he's either blanking me or has black man blindness - a blindness which causes black men to not heed the advice of white men, thus ruining their chances of advancement in life. Remember Sammy, house N-words have houses; think about it. Call me!
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The Jews are responsible for all the war in the world. Also, they can't cook for shit.
 
Old 2011-06-15, 15:29
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX
dsnt trust ne1 < 30
 
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Location: Home is where the <3 is
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I just ran over a little bird with the mower. I FEEL AWFUL!!!!
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-15, 16:01
Paddy
Forum Daemon
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 3,745
Now you know how God felt on 9/11.
 
Old 2011-06-15, 16:11
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX
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Poor little thing. I was looking for my sickle and saw some feathers. I looked closer and saw part of a small wing, innards, and a leg. And it looked like a nest, but it might have been a clump off the tractor, but it was in some real tall grass in a swampy area so I don't know what kind of bird it even was. Just a little brown birdie.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-15, 16:17
Paddy
Forum Daemon
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 3,745
Whoa brown birdie, bam-a-lam,
Whoa brown birdie, bam-a-lam!
 
Old 2011-06-15, 16:38
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L,B'XXX
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omg..... I HATE that song, too. Thanks. shredded tweet.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-15, 17:02
Paddy
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Join Date: Dec 2004
Posts: 3,745
You know who I feel sorry for the most? That dead bird's eggs. Who's gonna vomit chewed-up worms into their beaks now? I imagine the person who slaughtered their mother might bear that responsibility, but why should you do it Bobbi? It's not like there's some mystical omniscient being in the sky - the creator of all things - watching and judging your every move...

Oh...

Best get to digging for worms (the ones in your ass won't do) before the rapture hits. And by "rapture" I of course mean "terminal titty rot".
 
Old 2011-06-15, 17:05
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX
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Paddy, you misunderstand! But you're ginger so you can't help it. I think it was a baby bird in the nest. There were no others around. It might have even been booted from the nest and dead already, but it looked like the blood was kinda fresh. Beats me.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-15, 18:45
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,542
Quote:
Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
I just ran over a little bird with the mower. I FEEL AWFUL!!!!

A week or two ago I shot a squirrel with a .22 rifle. The round pierced through its lower abdomen, and it just sort of sat there for a few seconds then fell off the branch. It was still alive, so I started beating it a few times with the rifle stock and the dude was still breathing. I beat it some more and I think it finally died when it's head caved in. Brain matter and blood all over my stock. I didn't really want it to take a whole minute to die, but whatever. They are pests around here.
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I dont have any funny quotes

NEGROGENESIS



Last edited by drawn&quartered : 2011-06-15 at 19:47.
 
Old 2011-06-15, 19:49
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Dyldo
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Location: Californeeway
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
I like her tattoos and her ass. That's enough for me!

But come on Gail Simmons???
http://images.teamsugar.com/files/u...il2.preview.jpg
Fuckin weird man

HAHAHA, she looks absolutely terrifying in that picture and now that I'm looking at pictures of her on google, I can admit she does not photograph well. She's much more appealing live
__________________
Check my band out:
facebook.com/deadheadroses
deadheadroses.bandcamp.com
deadheadrosesmusic.com
i'm so bonery
 
Old 2011-06-15, 21:52
Chris Rezendes's Avatar
Chris Rezendes
Attorney at Bird Law
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: Alone here, with emptiness, eagles, and snow...
Posts: 3,567
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dyldo
HAHAHA, she looks absolutely terrifying in that picture and now that I'm looking at pictures of her on google, I can admit she does not photograph well. She's much more appealing live

She's not bad. She has a sweet rack, anyway. I'm giving this one to Gomers, though. Bonds wins with dat ass.

Also, fuck hippos. They're always cock-blocking crocodiles just to troll.
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Old 2011-06-16, 04:20
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PST 88
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Are there Jews in Harlem? I think you're confusing Jews and blacks, which is understandable, given that as a Ginger Irishman you've never encountered either. I'm assuming you're aware that there's a Harlem in New Amsterdam and not just the one in Holland, but that's really assuming a lot given your displayed intellect.

That was the most horrific Gail Simmons picture I've ever seen. According to my friends who've met her, she's pretty sexy (if also tending towards fat) in person. And she gets excited if you have a serious meat program, which is hot.
 
Old 2011-06-16, 04:29
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX
dsnt trust ne1 < 30
 
Join Date: Jan 2003
Location: Home is where the <3 is
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Quote:
Originally Posted by drawn&quartered
A week or two ago I shot a squirrel with a .22 rifle. The round pierced through its lower abdomen, and it just sort of sat there for a few seconds then fell off the branch. It was still alive, so I started beating it a few times with the rifle stock and the dude was still breathing. I beat it some more and I think it finally died when it's head caved in. Brain matter and blood all over my stock. I didn't really want it to take a whole minute to die, but whatever. They are pests around here.



Red squirrels are bothersome here because they chew wiring and stuff like that, but fox squirrels are cool and they're fun to watch. You could have just broken its neck if you were having that much trouble.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-16, 08:56
drawn&quartered's Avatar
drawn&quartered
Too _____, wouldn't fuck
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 2,542
Quote:
Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
Red squirrels are bothersome here because they chew wiring and stuff like that, but fox squirrels are cool and they're fun to watch. You could have just broken its neck if you were having that much trouble.

that's what I tried initially
__________________
I dont have any funny quotes

NEGROGENESIS


 
Old 2011-06-16, 10:50
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JoeYngVai
Vaginal Warts
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: I live in a giant bucket.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy


Thats an awesome video. That reminds me that I want to watch Planet Earth again.

Oh and BREAKING BAD SEASON 4 begins tomorrow... Fuck yes... mother fucker.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2011-06-16, 13:04
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX
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Join Date: Jan 2003
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Quote:
Originally Posted by drawn&quartered
that's what I tried initially


I see. It dawned on me as I was driving to my friend's house that I forgot to yell at you for using your gun stock to beat it! You'll shoot yer eye out!! I almost shot myself in the foot once because I miscounted the rounds in the Ruger .22 pistol I was shooting. Carry a knife or a hammer next time.
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-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-16, 13:41
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
Are there Jews in Harlem? I think you're confusing Jews and blacks, which is understandable, given that as a Ginger Irishman you've never encountered either. I'm assuming you're aware that there's a Harlem in New Amsterdam and not just the one in Holland, but that's really assuming a lot given your displayed intellect.

That was the most horrific Gail Simmons picture I've ever seen. According to my friends who've met her, she's pretty sexy (if also tending towards fat) in person. And she gets excited if you have a serious meat program, which is hot.

Oh shit, you know people that've met her? I'd pay to lick their hands. I think she's incredibly sexy on film and the extra meat she has on her helps. How did your friends get to meet her? I've got a pretty big meat program I'm sure she'd get excited about. And yeah, I don't know what the fuck is up with that picture or why anyone thought it'd be a good one to publish.

And hell yes I'm excited for Breaking Bad, even if I almost have a heart attack with every episode.
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Last edited by Dyldo : 2011-06-16 at 13:48.
 
Old 2011-06-16, 13:42
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drawn&quartered
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Quote:
Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
I see. It dawned on me as I was driving to my friend's house that I forgot to yell at you for using your gun stock to beat it! You'll shoot yer eye out!! I almost shot myself in the foot once because I miscounted the rounds in the Ruger .22 pistol I was shooting. Carry a knife or a hammer next time.

Don't worry, I emptied the mag and cleared the chamber before doing so
Quote:
Oh and BREAKING BAD SEASON 4 begins tomorrow... Fuck yes... mother fucker.

nice!
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Old 2011-06-16, 14:05
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JoeYngVai
Oh and BREAKING BAD SEASON 4 begins tomorrow... Fuck yes... mother fucker.
You sure you're not a month early? I read that it's starting July 17th, not June. I'd like to be wrong, but I'm Paddy, so I'm not.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Breaki..._%28season_4%29
 
Old 2011-06-16, 14:18
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Quote:
Originally Posted by drawn&quartered
Don't worry, I emptied the mag and cleared the chamber before doing so

nice!


I thought I'd dry fired the last shot and when it went bang in the ground a few in front of me I learned a valuable lesson. At least you were thinking.
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-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-16, 15:01
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
You sure you're not a month early? I read that it's starting July 17th, not June. I'd like to be wrong, but I'm Paddy, so I'm not.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Breaki..._%28season_4%29

Oh god dammit, Ian.
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Old 2011-06-16, 16:19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
You sure you're not a month early? I read that it's starting July 17th, not June. I'd like to be wrong, but I'm Paddy, so I'm not.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Breaki..._%28season_4%29


Internet, where gingers come to use google and cheat in the game of life.
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Old 2011-06-16, 20:41
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FUCKING HELL. I heard June 17th from two different people... WTF.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


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R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
 
Old 2011-06-16, 23:44
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Quote:
Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
I just ran over a little bird with the mower. I FEEL AWFUL!!!!

It may have already been dead. Too bad it wasn't a crow though. I hate crows Obnoxious little shitheads...

Years ago there was this one crow that would always dive-bomb me and my neighbors for absolutely no reason whenever we left our houses. One day I was outside and witnessed my neighbor being viciously pecked by the damn thing. Now most people would laugh at the idea of a grown man having his ass handed to him by a bird, but the fact that it drew blood and he had to go to the hospital for a series of shots wasn't amusing at all. So the next morning I waited outside for the thing and shot it.

It was a victorious day for me.
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Quote:
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Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
 
Old 2011-06-17, 05:54
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Did you look for a nest? They're territorial and most birds would react the same way. Crows are very smart birds. According to my grandma, her dad split a crow's tongue and taught it to talk. I've seen jays and robins divebomb dogs before, but there were nests or babies around.

I think this bird was probably still alive just because there was a little fresh blood. A bird that size would probably only have about a half teaspoon if that. It might have been though.
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-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
 
Old 2011-06-17, 08:04
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Hm. Wow. For my part, these days I usually share the balcony with two little birds; they're in the habit of sitting on the railing like two fluffy balls with a beak on the end, chirping and checking out the landscape, at about the same time I have my morning tea out there. This morning one of them fluttered over to the table and had itself a real good look-see at me. "What are you? And why don't you have wings?"
I feel so extremely un-metal right now, and a tad depressed at the fact.
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Old 2011-06-17, 10:07
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I'd ride the dorsal fin of the biggest great white I could find for as long as it'd let me.
 
Old 2011-06-17, 11:49
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I'd take the reins of a T-Rex if they weren't extinct.
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Old 2011-06-17, 12:29
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I would take the reins of an Allosaurus and beat the shit out of your T-Rex. Anybody else like the idea of dinosaur gladiator fights?
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Old 2011-06-17, 12:43
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Wasn't that a tv show for awhile? Where they simulated cg fights between dinosaurs and other prehistoric badasses? I'm pretty sure you can make your dinosaur war-game fantasies come true, chris.
 
Old 2011-06-17, 12:47
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I'd eject from my T-Rex right before it exploded and land on my Spinosaurus with laser-guided missile launchers as hands.

Did the big carnivorous dinos even use their hands? Or was it just to make them look hilarious?
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Old 2011-06-17, 13:04
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I would fuck a dolphin
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Old 2011-06-17, 13:33
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I have an amazing picture I drew when I was 6 or 7 of Dinosaurs with lasers shooting at each other and ninjas jumping out of helicopters. I'll have to find it as it pretty much is a dinosaur gladiator war zone.

Quote:
Originally Posted by drawn&quartered
I would fuck a dolphin

Sex With Dolphins - a "How To", - and a personal Viewpoint
I stripped off my shorts, and gently pulled her into the shallows until she was lying on her side, her belly facing towards me, half submerged in the water. I nestled myself belly to belly against her, and pressed my member against her genital slit. She immediately arched her body against mine, and took me inside her body, initiating a quick series of muscular contractions with her vaginal muscles. I wrapped my left arm around her body and just held her close while she manipulated me inside her body, until I climaxed barely 2 minutes later. Surprisingly, her body also shuddered against mine, and we spent the next 5 or so minutes just lying together in the shallows, holding each other, enjoying our company and revelling in the fact that we had shared something special together, something very few people can claim to have done.
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Last edited by Dyldo : 2011-06-17 at 13:36.
 
Old 2011-06-17, 13:40
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DameFraMorkum
Wasn't that a tv show for awhile? Where they simulated cg fights between dinosaurs and other prehistoric badasses? I'm pretty sure you can make your dinosaur war-game fantasies come true, chris.
Haha, yeah they did! I remember because one of the episodes that came out was the same exact premise as a song that I written and I was worried that if I actually ever got around to recording that song that they might claim it was their idea, despite the fact that I had written it first (and despite the fact that the scene was well recorded by paleontologists).

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dyldo
I'd eject from my T-Rex right before it exploded and land on my Spinosaurus with laser-guided missile launchers as hands.

Did the big carnivorous dinos even use their hands? Or was it just to make them look hilarious?
Most groups did, including Allosaurids and Spinosaurids, but Tyrannosaurs certainly didn't. At least, not for anything particularly useful. I'd throw out the possibility that they may have served some reduced breeding-related function, much like the cloacal spurs (primitive, reduced leg bones) of boid and pythonid snakes. Males will use their cloacal spurs as a sort of foreplay, tickling the female along her back with them in order to make her more receptive.
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Old 2011-06-17, 13:42
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dyldo
I have an amazing picture I drew when I was 6 or 7 of Dinosaurs with lasers shooting at each other and ninjas jumping out of helicopters. I'll have to find it as it pretty much is a dinosaur gladiator war zone.
That sound so much like something Maddox would do.
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Old 2011-06-17, 14:22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris Rezendes
That sound so much like something Maddox would do.

I was a pretty bad ass kid. If I find it I'll scan it.
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Old 2011-06-17, 15:48
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My mamakickurass would beat down your Allosauraus and your T Rex. After all, the t stands for teensy.


Amadeus, put some seed or crumbs by you and see if you can be the bird whisperer.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!

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