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  #81  
Old 2011-05-01, 12:47
Dyldo's Avatar
Dyldo Dyldo is offline
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Don't get your panties in a twist.
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  #82  
Old 2011-05-01, 23:14
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blitz906 blitz906 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dyldo
His newest line of product is his "Winning Streak" underwear line (a tacky marketing name with the Sheen reference, I think, but hey, whatever sells). This is something I've been paid to do myself, actually! Basically, I wore a tight pair of white (usually Fruit of the Loom, cotton) underwear for a few days while only doing a very minimal amount of wiping so that you get those lovely brown streaks running up and down the backside. The customer also requested that I run 2.5 miles each day so that was interesting (and lucrative!). I had no intention of getting involved in this but as a joke he put my picture up on his site as one of the models you could commission to wear the underwear and I was picked a few times! They were all uncomfortable 5 days but it paid for this computer I am typing to you on.

How much would you charge to give yourself a big gash with a razor blade, then let it get infected and send me the smelly pus covered bandage dressings?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
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  #83  
Old 2011-05-02, 09:23
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Dyldo Dyldo is offline
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That sounds kind of dangerous! I'd rather just wear putrid stanky underwear for you. PM me if you're interested.
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i'm so ronrey
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  #84  
Old 2011-05-02, 10:08
L,B'XXX's Avatar
L,B'XXX L,B'XXX is offline
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Yeah, well, but you lied. I want my money back.
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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  #85  
Old 2011-05-02, 23:18
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blitz906 blitz906 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dyldo
That sounds kind of dangerous! I'd rather just wear putrid stanky underwear for you. PM me if you're interested.

Okay okay... my first offer was a little too weird. How about I meet you in the middle: $400.00 for a large vial full of smegma?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
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  #86  
Old 2011-05-03, 07:43
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Dyldo Dyldo is offline
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Unfortunately I am circumcised, but I know a few freak - I mean, people, that aren't. I can get them to if you want.
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Check my band out:
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deadheadroses.bandcamp.com
deadheadrosesmusic.com
i'm so ronrey
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  #87  
Old 2011-05-03, 22:51
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blitz906 blitz906 is offline
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Haha. I actually have my turtleneck intact. I could produce it myself if I wanted to

Any offers, Paddy?
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
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  #88  
Old 2011-05-03, 23:50
Wolfsherz Wolfsherz is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blitz906
How much would you charge to give yourself a big gash with a razor blade, then let it get infected and send me the smelly pus covered bandage dressings?


Done, done, as soon as I get the money, 20 bucks.
Also why you no check my popsongs
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So this Georgian Olympian runs into a bar

Aosoth - New album III out now on Agonia Recs
Epoch - bass, guitars, drums, MetaStasizing out asap
Asphixa - bass, demo out asap
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Quote:
Originally Posted by far_beyond_sane
Tetianblood? ... Well, 'Necrosemen' to you too. Twat.
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  #89  
Old 2011-05-04, 04:01
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Gomli Gomli is offline
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Wolfsherz
Done, done, as soon as I get the money, 20 bucks.
Also why you no check my popsongs

!!!
good that you remind me I've downloaded them a few days ago
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C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
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  #90  
Old 2011-05-08, 00:00
Paddy Paddy is offline
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Added the Texas Slave Ranch. I'm pretty sure it's a typo; this shit only happens in Ohio, but whateva.
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  #91  
Old 2011-05-08, 07:53
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JoeYngVai JoeYngVai is offline
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And that is why I don't work on ranches. I could have seen that coming from a mile away. Anybody crazy enough to run a ranch is surely crazy enough to torture you to death with cattle prods.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PST 88
The bottom of that 'Don't Click' picture is one of the funniest things I've seen in a while. 'No, I really DO have a vagina! It's right here!'


Blackwater (Friend's Metal Band)
MY WEBSITE!


R.I.P Paddy. My dear and loving father will never be forgotten.
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  #92  
Old 2011-05-08, 16:51
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blitz906 blitz906 is offline
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Has this one been added yet?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sailing_stones

I found quite a few more that I'll post later on.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
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  #93  
Old 2011-05-08, 18:59
Gomli's Avatar
Gomli Gomli is offline
ComeOutYeBlackAndTans!
 
Join Date: May 2008
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Quote:
Originally Posted by blitz906
Has this one been added yet?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sailing_stones

I found quite a few more that I'll post later on.


made me shiver
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C'est le chant des vieux arbres entonné pour toi,
Pour ces bois obscurs maintenant endormis.


R.I.P moe
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  #94  
Old 2011-05-09, 04:09
blitz906's Avatar
blitz906 blitz906 is offline
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__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
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  #95  
Old 2011-05-09, 22:32
Paddy Paddy is offline
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Added all of the above (that is, the ones which weren't already added before, ya lazy doesn't-check-shit muthafucka!).

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  #96  
Old 2011-05-09, 23:29
Amadeus's Avatar
Amadeus Amadeus is online now
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Posts: 2,148
You tell him. How dare he?
__________________
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
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  #97  
Old 2011-05-10, 00:58
Paddy Paddy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Amadeus
You tell him. How dare he?
I don't know, but he did. He DARED. The only thing I hate more than daring is cajoling. That and coat-holding Swedes.
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  #98  
Old 2011-05-10, 02:53
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blitz906 blitz906 is offline
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I'm sorry everybody I'm sorry that I let you all down.

If it makes you feel any better, you can all take turns spanking my bare arse.
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
Reply With Quote
  #99  
Old 2011-05-10, 03:22
blitz906's Avatar
blitz906 blitz906 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Charles Domery | A Polish solider who couldn't stop eating.

This part made me lol hard:

"During service on the French frigate Hoche, he attempted to eat the severed leg of a crew member hit by cannon fire, before other members of the crew wrestled it from him."
__________________
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
Chances are there have been Irish in every corner of the world, no matter how remote. Our semen is listed in the World Health Organisation's Big Book of Pestilential Materials.
Quote:
Originally Posted by CompelledToLacerate
God, the Japanese are so weird. This HAS to be the long term effects of the atom bombs. No one is that weird on purpose.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Gomli
The slams in that song always kill me. First time I heard that song I was like "Too much heaviness - brain collapse" but now I could murder my family to that one
Reply With Quote
  #100  
Old 2011-05-10, 20:34
Amadeus's Avatar
Amadeus Amadeus is online now
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Posts: 2,148
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paddy
I don't know, but he did. He DARED. The only thing I hate more than daring is cajoling. That and coat-holding Swedes.


You do assume, of course, that the sharp edge wasn't aimed at you.
__________________
Listening to Cannibal Corpse and cutting trees with a chainsaw, now that's metal

"He preferred the hard truth over his dearest illusion. That, is the heart of science."
- Carl Sagan

"Imagination is more important than intelligence" - Einstein
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