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  #1  
Old 2002-10-21, 00:32
Eternal_Sorrow Eternal_Sorrow is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2001
Posts: 168
Red face enter the nexus of hate

One day i sort of just became inspired to write this song below i think it turned out well and i would appreciate feedback, and i really mean that since most people don't usually reply. I think this song would sound great played in a "Kovenant" or "Dawn of Dreams" style. And i "MEAN" the dawn of dreams "DEATH METAL" band "NOT" the doom metal band!!!

"The Nexus of Hate"

As i emerg form this womb of lies,
nothing but fire burns in my soul.
As i am ever drawn towards,
THE flickering distance!!!

Mindless as a zombie i am,
and i shall always be
forever wandering towards
the burning distance!!!

And so i ask myself, "why only me?"
But the i finally see, we will all die one by one
As we face the deadly distance!!!

And now my journey ends, as i reach this void of death
the souls of a thousand men before me,
as i decend into this everflowing sodom.
And become forever trapped in this,
NEXUS OF HATE!!

As i am torn apart, my body no more
a useless soul is what i've become.
as i am trapped within the walls of hate,
all the hate of mankind.

And so i bargain for my soul with the lord of the nexus,
but he claims my soul will never be free.
until i realize he does not hold the key,
to my exsitence.

Recollecting on his words i ponder,
of what it is that is keeping me here.
Then i finally realize, the NEXUS is no more than the insanity
within all our minds!!!!
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  #2  
Old 2002-10-21, 03:59
Def's Avatar
Def Def is offline
Master Killer
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Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Utrecht, The Netherlands
Posts: 11,372
aw, it's pretty cool, I beginning except for the returning #distance# everytime, but maybe it'll sound nice with music around it, don't know.

one thing I don't get, where does this song lead to? I mean, ehm, the meaning of the song, my english is not like, perfect so it's pretty difficult
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  #3  
Old 2002-10-21, 11:22
morbid_death
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Posts: n/a
i have mixed reactions, i agree with def fx about the 'distance thing'

the first few verses seem like the 'feeling' that the SB (significant being; the song character). but all of the sudden, 'his journey ends'. i mean, where the hell does that come from?


i'll skip a few verses because then i come to my next reactions;

didn't the journey for the SB end? even if symbolicaly, how can the SB be left pondering when his journey has ended? it says the nexus is just each and owns insanity, but why did you even mention beinng trapped in the nexus?

if you meant that this 'ending of the journey' is wat it seemed like for the SB, IMO you should have made that clear.

although, this is just all IMO...so dont fret over it in any way shape or form.
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