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  #1  
Old 2005-06-19, 13:19
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The Ashes: 2005

It's that time of the cricket callender again: England v Australia!

If you don't like cricket, fuck off. If your not open to other people liking cricket, fuck off. If you want to bash cricket, fuck off. All of these things can be done elsewhere at anti-cricket websites, so fuck off to them instead of sullying my thread.

Now...

England have drawn first and second blood within the last week, beating Australia in the first ever Twenty20 international and beating them again in the first one day international of the series. The Aussies looked a little rusty but I'm sure they'll be at the peak of their powers by the time the first test starts in July.

England have been bolstered by the form of Kevin Pietersen who completely dismantled Jason Gillespie to bludgeon 91 runs off 65 balls. I thought it was going to be close but thanks to Pietersen England strolled home with more than two overs to spare. Great performance!

Rest assured that Australia will be like a wounded animal and bounce right back. They haven't lost an Ashes series for 15 years so they'll be eager to extend that for another two years.

I can't wait for the tests to begin: the two best teams in the world fighting for the right to hold the Ashes for the next two years is truly mouthwatering. Should be a fascinating summer for cricket lovers!
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Old 2005-06-19, 13:48
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Australia are going down.

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  #3  
Old 2005-06-19, 13:53
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I hope so - we've got a better chance this year than at any other time in the past 15 years. For once we have a feared bowling attack of Harmison, Hoggard, Jones and Flintoff that can finally put a bomb under the Aussie batsmen. Our batting has much more depth these days too, especially if the test selectors wake up and give Pietersen a starting place.
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Old 2005-06-19, 14:02
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I'm kinda worried. Australia losing to Bangladesh. erk.

I keep telling myself that ODI's are very different to Test Cricket.
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  #5  
Old 2005-06-19, 14:07
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Well, they are! I'm not reading anything into the results from the past week - Australia will be a very different beast by the time the real scrap begins in the tests. Before this week they hadn't played any cricket for 7 weeks so they were bound to be a little rusty.
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Old 2005-06-19, 14:11
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Yeah. Well, Gilchrist seems to play Test Match Cricket like ODI's, maybe he's a little confused there.

Australia hasn't had any real competition in Test Cricket for awhile now, even India weren't much of a match. I'm kind of in the dark about England, I don't know much about their team. I obviously know of Harmison (is he still out of form? I hope so) and Flintoff. Quite keen to see how it pans out - hopefully Hayden can hit peak form also. May be his last chance.
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  #7  
Old 2005-06-19, 14:26
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nihilist
Yeah. Well, Gilchrist seems to play Test Match Cricket like ODI's, maybe he's a little confused there.


That's a good point. In fact, I guess Australia play tests like ODIs anyway, considering that they usually rattle along at over 4 an over for most of the time they are batting in tests.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Nihilist
Australia hasn't had any real competition in Test Cricket for awhile now, even India weren't much of a match. I'm kind of in the dark about England, I don't know much about their team. I obviously know of Harmison (is he still out of form? I hope so) and Flintoff. Quite keen to see how it pans out - hopefully Hayden can hit peak form also. May be his last chance.


Harmison took 5 wickets today, removing the top four batsmen (Gilchrist, Hayden, Ponting and Martyn). But like I said, I'm not holding ODI perfomances with too much regard at the moment. In the tests against Bangladesh last month, he seemed a little off the pace though.

Other players to watch out for are the openers (Strauss and Trescothick), Vaughan and the wicketkeeper, Geraint Jones. Jones is in the Gilchrist mould in that he likes to bat quite flamboyantly. Obviously he's not as good as Gilchrist in 'keeping or batting but he's about as good a batsman/wicketkeeper that England has.

Another one to watch out for is Kevin Pietersen - this fella hits the ball as hard, if not harder than Flintoff. He hit 4 sixes today and they were trully mammothian in stature. The only problem for England is that the test selectors are inexpicably reluctant to give him a chance at test level. He didn't even get a call up against Bangladesh, which I thought was ridiculous - what better introduction to test cricket than against a gang of no-hopers?

It's hard to single out an Australian that I am particularly worried about because all eleven are so damn good! McGrath, Lee, Warne, Ponting, Hayden, Gilchrist...
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Old 2005-06-19, 14:37
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Yeah, even since Bevan left International Cricket (he now plays for Tasmania and has a record of 10 consectutive centuries - silly move dumping him) we haven't really had a batsman that likes to score 100 from 200+ balls too often. Gilchrist for example. 100 from 60 in a test match. That's just ridiculous. Ponting is about as calm as it gets.

Oh of course, Vaughan, Strauss and Trescothick. How the hell did I forget those guys. Strauss is quite simply amazing. Very reliable player.

I heard about Pietersen being a great hit of the ball. I agree with you there, not calling him up for Bangladesh is a bit stupid. But I guess you don't want an inexperienced player (unless I've got my info wrong?) playing in The Ashes against one of the best teams in history. After his form in the ODI, I'm guessing he'll be included?

I wouldn't worry too much about Lee. He's fast, but that comes at a price - he is very expensive. But Warne and McGrath.. haha. Warne's favourite team, England is! Ponting is in tip-top shape still, Hayden hasn't had a good run since 2002. Gilchrist is definitely one to watch. Clarke has lost his touch.

...this series will be close.
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  #9  
Old 2005-06-19, 14:49
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Yeah, it will - the closest for a good few years.

I think Lee will be more destructive against the tail whereas it'll be McGrath, Warne, Gillespie that will focus on the upper and middle order. We are still getting shown *that* ball from Warne to Mike Gatting!

Re Pietersen: you'd think he'd be included but we're talking about the England test selection committee here - common sence doesn't usually prevail! Which makes our rise up the test rankings even more remarkable!

Ah, Bevan. Now there's a player! I used to love watching his one day innings - I think his average was something like 65!
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Old 2005-06-19, 14:51
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Quote:
Originally Posted by johnmansley
We are still getting shown *that* ball from Warne to Mike Gatting!

hahahaha
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  #11  
Old 2005-06-19, 19:02
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Quote:
Originally Posted by johnmansley

I think Lee will be more destructive against the tail whereas it'll be McGrath, Warne, Gillespie that will focus on the upper and middle order.
!


That would make sense. Straight and low and bloody fast from about #8 down.

Many things cricket.

1. When we need wickets, why push all the fieldsmen back? No fucking slip to a tailender who you need to dismiss to win? Ricky Ponting = a bit slow.

2. What the FUCK is with youse guys batting order? Isn't it all a bit weird?

3. When was the last time we played a game of cricket? "A bit rusty" is an understatement. Things went creak fart blerch thump.

4. Bangladesh were great. I was amused. They're all so happy now.

5. Pietersen has very annoying hair. His head looks like a rogue skunk carved from a block of spam.

6. That fucking catch... seriously impressed. God, you clowns looked sharp all day! What happened to that old deadbeat aura of lose-a-bility you used to have?

7. Your cricketers are all really very ugly. Harmison looks like a rogue ape. Flintoff looks like a lager lout post-beating with a lump of reinforced concrete. Vaughan has a face pinched so far together you couldn't separate his eyes with a micrometer. And that Lewis character! Last time I saw a nose like that, it was on the bow of an icebreaker in Tierra del Fuego. It looks like it was borrowed from a costume shop. All in all, they are even uglier than ours. We should keep these men in cages.
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  #12  
Old 2005-06-19, 19:07
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  #13  
Old 2005-06-19, 23:08
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Quote:
Originally Posted by johnmansley
Harmison took 5 wickets today, removing the top four batsmen (Gilchrist, Hayden, Ponting and Martyn).

3 of them being off 4 balls.

It was a bit depressing watching Gillespie bowl his last couple of overs and seing Pietersen score somewhat in the region of 17 an over.
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  #14  
Old 2005-06-20, 00:51
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im not into cricket that much......infact i only watch the matches which India is playing


bangladesh beat australia.......hahaha
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  #15  
Old 2005-06-21, 00:57
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All I can say is that they'll build up the series heaps, making everyone think Australia is finally going to lose, only for us to thrash you silly Poms yet again.

And now is the time that Clarke needs to step up and show what a player he can potentially be....

Sorry, I have not paid too much attention to the English side, yet I know what Vaughn's capable of.
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Old 2005-06-21, 04:43
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Quote:
Originally Posted by far_beyond_sane
Many things cricket.

1. When we need wickets, why push all the fieldsmen back? No fucking slip to a tailender who you need to dismiss to win? Ricky Ponting = a bit slow.

2. What the FUCK is with youse guys batting order? Isn't it all a bit weird?

3. When was the last time we played a game of cricket? "A bit rusty" is an understatement. Things went creak fart blerch thump.

4. Bangladesh were great. I was amused. They're all so happy now.

5. Pietersen has very annoying hair. His head looks like a rogue skunk carved from a block of spam.

6. That fucking catch... seriously impressed. God, you clowns looked sharp all day! What happened to that old deadbeat aura of lose-a-bility you used to have?

7. Your cricketers are all really very ugly. Harmison looks like a rogue ape. Flintoff looks like a lager lout post-beating with a lump of reinforced concrete. Vaughan has a face pinched so far together you couldn't separate his eyes with a micrometer. And that Lewis character! Last time I saw a nose like that, it was on the bow of an icebreaker in Tierra del Fuego. It looks like it was borrowed from a costume shop. All in all, they are even uglier than ours. We should keep these men in cages.


1. I agree, not quite in Steve Waugh's class as captain.

2. Weird? It's fucked! Solanki (an opener in county cricket) bats at 8; Strauss (a bloody top class opener) had been batting at 4 until recently; Collingwood (an expert at the death) batted at 4 on Sunday; Flintoff and Pietersen bat at 5 and 6 respectively and should be batting at 4 and 5. Very puzzling, indeed.

3. Seven weeks is a very long time in international cricket.

4. Not as amused as I was

5. Haha, very true!

6. Collingwood is awesome in the field. Missed a dolly (well, in comparison) later on in the innings though. Our upturn in fortunes and mental attitude is entirely down to one factor: we fucked off English an English head coach and replaced him with a Zimbabwean!

7. Thank the Heavens Lewis won't get a look in during the tests!

Tim: you might know a few more names after this summer. We might not win, but you'll be imperessed at some of the guys we have playing now (Strauss, Trescothick, Harmison, Flintoff, Pietersen, etc).
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Old 2005-06-26, 13:46
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Well, England reverted to type this week and surrendered meekly against the Aussies! But we beat Bangladesh today to guarantee our place in the final so we'll see you Aussies there.
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Old 2005-06-26, 13:59
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I have no idea what you guys are talking about.
Is cricket a rough sport? Meaning are there wicked injuries like Rugby and stuff?

I saw some guys face in a news article last year....was Rugby I think where half of his face got almost kicked off.....was all torn and sagging and bloody...and he's standing there on the field like a badass. I was very impressed.

Here in the US everyone thinks NFL is the shit.....but all the pads and helmet pale in comparrison to some of the sports you guys play.
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Old 2005-06-26, 18:20
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You Yankee pillock. You haven't the first aardvark-molesting idea how cricket is played? What kind of former colonial are you?

Suffice to say, cricket is NOT rough unless you get hit in a soft spot by the dangerously hard ball travelling at 90 miles an hour (look, I even converted to Imperial).

I'm not explaining Cricket 101. It's a complicated story. But! Cricket was invented by English goons who wanted a game that would allow them to vegetate and drink themselves into a pink gin stupor over the course of five entire days, which is how long a match often takes.

Now Google it and find out what the rest of the world does for fun.
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Old 2005-06-26, 18:31
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Quote:
Originally Posted by far_beyond_sane
You Yankee pillock. You haven't the first aardvark-molesting idea how cricket is played? What kind of former colonial are you?
Now Google it and find out what the rest of the world does for fun.

heh heh....cool
I will google it as you're correct...I should not expect a cricket 101 lesson from you guys.
The Yank comment stung a little bit...I'm a southern girl all the way but know where you're comming from saying that.
Also....my entire family came to the US in 1903 from Cardiff Wales.....am I still a "former colonial"?

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