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  #1  
Old 2005-07-20, 14:29
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A friday night turns out to be a morgue

This is an advertisement for
selling yourself
And if sex sells
and heads swell
then why aren't i the pimp?
Pissheads are drunkards
And drunkards are pissed
But at least you look fine
On the outside..........

I wish i could show my effections for you
But it seems i have misplaced my gun,( it backfires )
Nuclear might has been coming for a long time

Silence is the answer to all things wrong

There are sluts at the disco (oh god)
Homo-erotic thoughts are on
Violence is in my bloodstream
This night is heading towards a morgue

History is flashing through my eyes (maybe i shouldn't do this)
And i think its time you were gone (i've got to choose)
I will do this to benefit the rest of society
and make us grow
so we can slowly prevent the likes of you

So i drink my self towards you, I drink my self towards you
A broken dance i'm dancing, this broken dance i'm dancing

I would ask you to dance too
(But i'd be too erotic for you)
As the city collapses
The crowd prolapses
(Is this a sign of a brand new trend?)
Yeah, i guess it could be

You're out of line saying the sunlight is wrong
But i will forgive you, my girlfriend says its fine to be with you
Inside the car, you say you get so alone (you will be soon)
I will help you, bullets are on my mind

I suggest we go somewhere warmer
And as you turn away i penetrate
And as the screwdriver finds its mark
You have never been so beautiful

RIP


A grind/gore song i guess........
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  #2  
Old 2005-07-20, 15:42
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hahahaha Maybe this should be a grind/gore intro to my scream-o emo t-shirt piece! The screwdriver making a hole in the shirt??? the "History..." verse is the one that made me think of that. We could do a Rocky Horror Picture Show musical. (Yes, I did quit drugs. Cross my heart. Thoughts like that are why my kids have told me to start again.)

Okay, I thought it wasn't bad. It's got some good imagery and lots of it. Some places seemed a little disjointed, but it all seemed to stay together in the end. The way you used the word "morgue" doesn't sound quite right to me. Maybe I'm not stressing where I should though.
Do you have a tune for it?
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-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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  #3  
Old 2005-07-20, 17:27
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i think it would make a perfect addition to your emo t-shirt song

yeah it did have a tune to it - was a song from an old band i was in ......a screamo band hahahahahahahahhahahahaha

the 'morgue' part was just something that i liked. I am sure i wrote it on a friday night when i had nothing to do and no one was around so i was thinking morgue..........

the idea was like of a serial killer who beleives what he is doing is for the good of everyone. it gets disjointed when i say 'bullets on my mind' when in fact a screwdriver is used. The screwdriver penetrating was meant to be the skull as they went to kiss.

Keep it emo, keep it screamo, keep it tight fitting
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  #4  
Old 2005-07-20, 19:40
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I think you just got the next line for another part of the "rrrrrock opera."

Keep it emo,
keep it screamo,
keep it tight fitting

Hmm, gotta think on this one, but that screwdriver idea's gotta come back into it.
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-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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  #5  
Old 2005-07-21, 06:08
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hmmmmmmm rock opera.......

more like screamopera

with whining a annoying choreographed falling down and crying

(think that my chemical romance video but for 2 hours)

i feel an award coming on
and the award for annoying and pointless opera about tight fitting t shirts goes to.........

SCREAMOPERA
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  #6  
Old 2005-07-21, 07:40
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Cool!! I love the name!!
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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  #7  
Old 2005-07-21, 10:52
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i thought some parts were a little off, but i like your wording, and how i could actually picture the car scene.. i got into it
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