Too bad you didn't see that I wasn't fucking interested.
I didn't want to play games, I didn't want to stay home, I didn't want to do shit when it suited you.
When I abide by the rules what has it shown you? Fucking nothing.
I wish you would get the fuck out of my room and my life, just for 10 fucking seconds.
When you have the right to be angry fucking do it, I have the right every day and don't show it.
I can't show or tell you the things I want to because I'm afraid of your reaction.
What pisses me off the most, is everything you do.
Give me a moment of FUCKING PEACE.

I thought we were talking about breakfast sex, not breakfast angst.

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The old "leave me alone I'm old enough to make my own decisions and do what I want" vs. "as long as you're staying here in my house you'll listen to what I say." Believe me. Even this old girl went through that. I finally learned to smile and nod, and use a little common sense. That doesn't mean to give in, but be a little more private in my doings. I don't know how life goes for you, but when i lived at home and felt like that I was one first class brat. When I look back on somethings I did or said I wish things had been different, but I made them the way they were. Since some of those people are deceased so I can't go back and I can't tell them the mistakes I made. They made some, too, but we're all humans. My mom even said several years ago that she thought I really hated her when I was growing up. I didn't, but I had my own baggage I never talked about becasue it just wasn't done in my family. But my mom and I are pretty good friends now so that's cool. I hope things work out for you and if you need to rant or anything pm me. Maybe I can be a sound board for ya. Most of the time the only one I confided in was Jesus, but I guess that wasn't such a bad thing.

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Nah, it goes alot deeper than just being fucking angry one day. Trust me there, fuck it, I'm not even gonna go into it,

I'm not pushing my religious views on you. Just mentioning that.
Anyways, I can see the use of profanity because it seems very spontaeous writing. Really getting the stuff out. But I think if you were to do it without all the "f" words you'd have broader audience appeal. It's a very typical feeling for teens to feel this way and actually the need for independence and respect are normal. Sometimes it just doesn't seem to fit right for awhile though.
You're phrasing and order was good. What I would like to see in this if you extend it are some things you want out of the relationship and feelings you have. Maybe some solutions, too. If this is written from the heart you may get to know yourself better. If it's written in character from another's point of view, the character will develop more, too. Everyone doesnt' always write from their own standpoint, but this one just seems to.
I'll shut up now.

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I was so angry when I wrote it granted, I didn't even think, I just wrote and when it was done I didn't think about it, I didn't look at it, I just felt relieved.

Therapeutic writing is wonderful for the soul. You did good, kid. Sometimes when I've done that and gone back to a piece it doesn't even seem to have come from me and I'm rather impressed with myself or I think about how those feelings pertain to the here and now.
Glad you shared it.


Write on!

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Dr. Phil! We need you here!

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sounds like you copied me and sucked at it, even the response posts are similar.

...except for the fact that yours sucked and his was pretty good. Yours was nothing but unimaginative drivel that I could have shit out onto a piece of paper. If I did shit on a piece of paper it wouldn't stink as much as your poem or attitude. Shut the fuck up.

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Sit down before you fall down, dumbass.

Did well. <--- This one really pisses me off.

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I was saying it like John Wayne. I just knew someone would comment on that.

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Don't expect those damn foreigners to know the Duke.

What's funny is that bloodredthrone's poem sounded like he copied Phil from Pantera and sucked at it. When I read it I could've sworn I was reading the lyrics to Walk. Not very True of him, though I suppose Phil rocks the BM too, so it's cool.

*5 minutes aloooooone*

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they BOTH suck, this poem is not good. At all, shut the fuck up and reread it. Not even catchy or anything, these angry songs are supposed to get stuck in your head so you can get pumped or something when you think of it. Well that's probably far fethced, but this song REALLY SUCKS.

p.s.- yah mine was a pantera knock off, not even a good one. I'll stick to what im at least mediocre at.

Oh, a few of them do, but it's probably most of the older ones. I do talk to a British kid that loves old westerns.

bloodredthrone I think you need to go to your happy place for awhile. It was not something that was carefully constructed, but a release of tension that he chose to share. Your piece was deliberately written as a knock-off. Nothing wrong with either. It just wasn't your cup o'tea.

Everybody go read The Doctor's songs and get happy.

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I guess the big difference is that he was writing something to express his anger and you were writing something because you're trying to be a hardass and failing miserably. His isn't supposed to be a song, and anybody whose heads aren't firmly lodged in their rectum can easily see that.

So far you've contributed nothing more than hostility and raw, septic douchebaggery. Close your fucking shithole until you can say something worth reading.

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Chris, didn't I just say that? Pay attention!!! Redundency has no place on metaltabs.

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Your post contained a thinly-veiled suspension/ban threat? I didn't notice that.

good, bye, this forum blows and chris is a fag. You're all pathetic assholes, have a good day.

And I bid you adieu. But please, listen to this warning first:



Listen

There once was a douchebag named Bloodredthrone
Who wouldn't leave metal tabs members alone
'til one day did pass
and I banned his dumb ass
And he cried to his mom on the phone

This is the poetry forum and all.

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HAHA!

And Infinity...
I liked what you wrote.

Chris R', You da man. You da man.

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.

that was one of the funniest things I've ever read.