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  #1  
Old 2004-05-15, 04:18
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"Wilkerson Hill"

There's a country cemetery not far from here where I used to write a bit in high school cuz I could never get any of the fish in the pond there to bite. Just a bit of imagery about the place. There was some pretty, big,bright orange koi or goldfish in there. I don't know if those are still there or not. The raccoons may have gotten those. This is more poem than song material. Thanks for the read.

" Wilkerson Hill "

Willows bending in slow motion
Graveyard lying still
Streaming moonlight between the clouds
Silver strands on blue velvet night
Calming to distraction

I've walked along the water's edge
And seen the reflection of the living
Focused in a stare attempting to concentrate
On a small glimse of the future
That I see but don't understand

Kneeling along the edge of the pond
Splayed fingers ripple the water
Golden fish glimmer in the moon's light
Their eyes meeting mine
Sharing time

Eyes across the way
Low to the ground, hovering in shadow
Moving left and right to spy on me
I stand and walk back home
My peace restored once again

BJH
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-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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  #2  
Old 2004-05-15, 09:11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
Sharing time

I like this line. It can be interpreted two ways, I think its very good and overall deep. It puts you in the place until youre done reading and realize you live in a shithole.
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  #3  
Old 2004-05-15, 18:04
dying-oath dying-oath is offline
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"Willows bending in slow motion
Graveyard lying still
Streaming moonlight between the clouds
Silver strands on blue velvet night
Calming to distraction"
this is hot. i love the silver and blue. it's a very rich, royal feeling that is projected, but not forced.
the entire piece of work is amazing. you would think that a poem about a graveyard would be spooky and just plain scary, or even gruesome, maybe macabre. you didn't do this. i think you portrayed a graveyard correctly, and how it's SUPPOSED to be shown. it seems so quiet and peaceful, but there's the tiniest bit of tension that is resolved in the end. and then the whole work has an air of timelessness. sort of like you're in space and it's all quiet; so very solemn and mysterious without being frightening. another thing i noticed is that even though you've got quite a bit of movement in it, it all seems like nothing's happening, like all time has stopped, and is standing still, waiting for you to restart it.
i love it. keep writing Gram.
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  #4  
Old 2004-05-16, 04:32
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Cool! That's the way I see cemeteries. I think they can be very fascinating places. And OOO! it gauls my ass when I hear about people stealing gravestones or damaging them. There are some old civil war stones in some of the ones around here that are barely readable now, but me and the kids when they were younger used to go look at some of the different ones. There's a towtruck engraved on one we found and a huge one with a big sailboat on it that looks really cool in a couple of the older ones we went to.
But I think they are very serene places. I don't know why I've always felt a peaceful comfort there, but I think I got it across from what you both said.

And sometime,c'v', writing and reading are good to get out ot the shithole when you physically can't do it for whatever reason. Sometimes I've gone back to an old piece I've written and it takes me away for awhile like a Calgon bubblebath !!
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-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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  #5  
Old 2004-05-16, 09:56
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what gets me away is a nice fatty steak. but I cant write while im eating.
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  #6  
Old 2004-05-16, 15:29
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Steeaaaakkkkk ...drools....
QUICK ! c'v' !! Look behind you!!!!

L,B' nabs steak and runs........ goooood!!
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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  #7  
Old 2004-05-17, 15:25
dying-oath dying-oath is offline
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ha. you're gonna cook that up for me now aren't you??? heh heh heh.........
love ya gram...... i'm hungry....
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  #8  
Old 2004-05-17, 18:05
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dying-oath
ha. you're gonna cook that up for me now aren't you??? heh heh heh.........
love ya gram...... i'm hungry....



BULLSHIT!!!
love, gram.... and i'm NOT hungry !!
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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  #9  
Old 2004-05-17, 19:29
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Quote:
Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
Steeaaaakkkkk ...drools....
QUICK ! c'v' !! Look behind you!!!!

L,B' nabs steak and runs........ goooood!!

dammit i was gonna eat that. Now i have to settle for goatmeat.
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  #10  
Old 2004-05-18, 01:57
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goats smell of the poops.
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hi my name is whitney, but you can call me Scrumptious
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  #11  
Old 2004-05-18, 06:00
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to quote Dieff 54, 52 or whatever the heck his name is

"I like chicken."

He'll probably be bringing his tubby bitchass over once Wally gets home. Oh joy.
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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  #12  
Old 2004-05-18, 16:40
dying-oath dying-oath is offline
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is that his head you're pounding on, or are you pounding YOUR head on something???
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Crying from the womb, I知 hating you
Burning from the pain, I chase after you,
Seething from the fake, I知 catching you,
Chasing after ghosts, I知 killing you.
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  #13  
Old 2004-05-18, 17:54
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No, he'll get his 'boot to the nutz' that he usually does from my kids. That's me getting rid of frustrations at seeing his charming smile and hearing --"What's up bitch" again. His mom gave me a sweet bday card a few years ago and thanked me for putting up with him so much ! He plays football for Case Western Reserve so he is a big boy. He's a sweetie though.
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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  #14  
Old 2004-05-19, 14:17
dying-oath dying-oath is offline
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that's so nice.
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Burning from the pain, I chase after you,
Seething from the fake, I知 catching you,
Chasing after ghosts, I知 killing you.
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  #15  
Old 2004-05-20, 04:33
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*stares at mashed potaytos (sp on purpose)* yeah uh huh......who moved my gravy?
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  #16  
Old 2004-05-20, 14:12
dying-oath dying-oath is offline
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sorry, i made the "potaytos" share with the steak. also trying to share the wealth ya know. spread it all around the plate, make everything into one big mush so you don't have to worry about looking like you like one thing better than another.
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Crying from the womb, I知 hating you
Burning from the pain, I chase after you,
Seething from the fake, I知 catching you,
Chasing after ghosts, I知 killing you.
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  #17  
Old 2004-05-20, 18:26
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sorry, i made the "potaytos"
share with the steak.
also trying to share the wealth ya know.
spread it all around the plate,
make everything into one big mush
so you don't have to worry
about looking like you like
one thing better than another.


heehee I'll make a verse outta anything--almost.
Man, I love the Pogues...... The Snake with Garnet Eyes
__________________
My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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