Every step brings a rising anger
Every gust brings a growing hunger
Every drop brings a dense confusion
And every breath creates growing frustration
Walking alone in the middle of the night
Cross the street as to avoid a fight
Every person that you can see
Bares the face of an enemy
But to walk alone is to wade in dispair
And you will be no happier there
And with the dimming of the night
Fades the chance of finding light
Misanthropy is on the mind
But tonights solace you will not find
Misery aching for company

I like this one better than the other you posted.

I liked the first 4 lines probably the best and the last one.

Actually i was just about to suggest a way to change the last line, but then i realized its context to the one before it.. Ok makes it even better. A small little twist ending.


"And you will be no happier there
And with the dimming of the night"

Doesn't quite sit with me right. I think its the 2 different lines beginning with the word and just kind of makes it not seem right in relation to the lines before and after these.
Just a thought.

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But to walk alone is to wade in dispair
And you will be no happier there
And with the dimming of the night
Fades the chance of finding light

Rhyme scheme? Seems fine to me man, read it with a little rhythm maybe... Uhm, This is about sometimes when I walk around by myself I zone out and get really pissed off at just everything.

Whats with the last line, what were you going to say about it? I dont think the last line is really in context with anything, it's just a statement and because there is no rhyme to go with it afterwards it makes it like a more official statement type thing to sort of make the ending emphasised.

i dunno man the use of and in both lines to me doesn't fit right. But hey if you like it thats cool. What i was going to say about the last line was put Misery IS aching for company, but reading it in context with the line before it wasn't supposed to be that statement but the opposite of that.

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Anaphora's a standard literary technique, and it's fairly well-used here. Note that it's two different 'and's in the lines.

Hmm well dude with the ands I don't think that is really anaphora maybe in the first 4 lines it could be but uhm with the ands I don't think it applies I really dont think like the ands are anything its just his personal preference of something he wouldnt do, fair enough, but its just fact that the 2 ands are justified and there is no problem with them...