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  #1  
Old 2006-04-06, 18:00
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L,B'XXX L,B'XXX is offline
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It's My Will That Now Will Be Done

Little ditty I wrote this afternoon after reading another piece elsewhere. It's metally.

" It's My Will That Now Will Be Done "

The day shines bright on the surface
But the buzzards are circling the sun
The laughter of kids in the playground
Seems surreal to what's going to come

The plan sparked by a fever
Taken as reality, not as what's fake
Stoking the fires of darkness in daylight
How much more can you take

(Chorus)
You did me in
And passed judgement on me
Setting fire to the hopes of what I wanted to be
You pulled me inside and struck me mercilessly
You thought it was over
You thought it was over

No blessings of peace until I've equaled
The blaspheme that's been done unto me
When I look at myself all I see are the scars
Raging sounds inside my head no one else hears
You're gonna hear
I'll make you hear

(Break)
You're gonna hear all the screams at night
Feel the burning rage that I felt inside
No healing or comfort, nothing to ever compare
You'll know what it feels like to suffer as me
It's my will that now will be done

(Chorus)
You did me in
And passed judgement on me
Setting fire to the hopes of what I wanted to be
You pulled me inside and struck me mercilessly
You thought it was over
You thought it was over

(Slower)
There's no cover in the world that can hide you from me
No falsification that will make me break
It's my will that now will be done

BJH
4/6/2006


EDIT: okay, now it's right.
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!

Last edited by L,B'XXX : 2006-04-07 at 19:19.
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  #2  
Old 2006-04-07, 12:59
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Unanything Unanything is offline
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Thumbs up

Now that's cool.

It's so sincere and powerful. Almost striking.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fatdanny
Also, check out Autopsy, the vocalist sounds like hes about to eat your grandmother while fucking you in the eye. Brutal.


Quote:
Originally Posted by floridadude
I coated the end of a toothpick with Satan's blood and simply wiped it across the top of an omelet. PERFECT!
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  #3  
Old 2006-04-07, 19:16
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L,B'XXX L,B'XXX is offline
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Well, I screwed up something somewhere when I put the chorus in. I have to figure that one out, but thanks for the kind words.

Fixed now I think.
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!

Last edited by L,B'XXX : 2006-04-07 at 19:19.
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  #4  
Old 2006-04-08, 12:25
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Amadeus Amadeus is offline
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You are a very boring writer. Most of those poems that cross my path, I can point out mistakes and things that could and maybe should be done different. I tend to be nice on this forum, but generally I find much amusement in the polite act of ripping apart, metaphorically speaking, creations of people who write for the sake of being special.

You don't give me that amusement. Honestly, you don't offer much joy of down rating at all.
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  #5  
Old 2006-04-08, 16:46
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L,B'XXX L,B'XXX is offline
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Thank you very much. I'm still as appreciative and humble feeling about comments like that as I was the first time I got comments like that. I'm glad you think that of my verses.
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My eldest son's bipolar website: www.bipolarmanifesto.com

-wally: Mom, you shouldn't play after me because it makes you sound even worse than you already do. -wally:*grumbles and whispers quietly* I guess it's cuz I love you or something, but you're still a TURD
Grimm:I could read your mind but its in font size .5
Amadeus:Oh, and was there a cesserole (never mind spelling) involved?
Paddy:the fact that you didn't end up on a kids show makes me question my atheism
Dyldo: You evil strumpet!
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