Thread: TV
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Old 2013-01-15, 15:23
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Dyldo Dyldo is offline
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Big Bang Theory:

>Penny is talking about how men are no longer manly
Audience clinches buttcheeks. It's the sound of winter. You could hear a pin drop as the anticipation mounts -- where could this lead? This is surely one of the best joke setups yet. A dog barks in the distance.

>Raj and Howard untuck their shirts and mess up hair in an effort to be more manly
Urine fills the floor amid a tidal wave of laughter. TV cameras shake as an associate producer shits her pants. A 27-year-old grad student falls over the audience railing and snaps both ankles, impervious to pain as he descends into hysteria. The entire front row, between tears of joy, begins an "EL OH EL" chant, complete with fist pumps and choreographed dance. A woman prematurely goes into labor after severe abdominal strain caused by intense laughter. Her stillborn child drops to the bleacher floor -- she picks it up, puts her finger to its mouth and, using impressive ventriloquism technique, makes it say "BAZINGA!" She then drops the child into a pool of its own blood, slips on the floor and dies from laughing so hard.

>Sheldon walks in with a beard
Audience feverishly bumrushes stage and carries off entire staff. Rioting in the street begins at 8:30 p.m. that evening and lasts six days. Million-man march organized, Emmy nomination board held hostage in their offices. Frothing crowd demands immediate and decisive action to ensure "Big Bang Theory" wins every category the following year. Trained baboons are released and taught to build "Big Bang Theory" idols and statues. Government grants cease for cancer research and are transferred to generating BBT embryos for in-vitro fertilization.

And that's just the first 5 minutes. God I hate that show.
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