Thread: Band needed
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Old 2011-10-28, 04:06
far_beyond_sane's Avatar
far_beyond_sane far_beyond_sane is offline
You gamma-minus fucktards
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Band needed

Hi fucks,

It's been a long time. But I have this thing called a Ph.D and it's like trying to raise a baby without hands. And resist kicking it to death.

Listen, I need a band. A particular band. You fuckers collectively know more metal than me, so I'm asking you a favour. Civil eh? Bear with me.

It's for a stage show. It's for a very particular kind of stage show where shit gets broken and things go flying around. Think of it as psychotic cabaret. And it requires a very particular kind of heavy shit. Now, it's on a very peculiar line, this heavy shit.

I need something that is driving, hard, fairly clean and consistent... it's a stage show, remember, this needs bass - no War From A Harlot's Mouth spazzy breakdown jizzbombs or nothing, no grizzled 300BPM fills, nothing like that.

There are a bag of things which are kind of getting there but not really heavy enough:

Alice Cooper - think Raise Your Fist and Yell kind of stuff, not the fucking ballads
Lordi - think the stuff that was threatening to have some kind of balls... Blood Red Sandman, Devil is a Loser etc. but never quite did
Rammstein or any other Neue Deutche Harte band - bass drives and it's all very German and shit, just not enough... grunt.

Something like Slipknot would be good if 1) everyone hadn't heard the songs 2) they played something relatively consistent instead of trying to be ARTCISTISICSIITCS 3) I didn't not like them.

And don't give me a bunch of shit THOSE BANDZ FAG LOLZ - if I had my way, I'd just use Jungle Rot songs but I don't get my way this time. Just be helpful... something must fit this bill. Help greatly appreciated.

It's good to see you by the way. You stained carpets with faces.

cheerzyacuntz,
FBS
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