View Single Post
  #26  
Old 2011-07-27, 04:05
Hugozhor Hugozhor is offline
Senior Metalhead
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Czech republic (Prag)
Posts: 134
Quote:
Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
Okay, you've got a conflict of idea here because in the bridge you have "Let the love begin" and then you say "Want no love just sex." If you can find a way to replace the first "love" the conflict will be gone.

Let the magic begin
Let the moment begin
Let impulse begin

Or you could change that line entirely. That's always an option.


You´re right about the conflict of idea. I mean love in bridge like "love-like". Bridge is about you´re talking to the girl who you want to screw, so you´re talking about love.

the only one word I can figure out it´s
"Skin on skin
Let the f*ck begin"

Quote:
Originally Posted by L,B'XXX
Oh, one other thing. Right at the beginning is she standing inside at a bar or outside the bar like on the sidewalk? "A bar" makes it sound like she's outside. If you mean inside, change "a bar" to "the bar" and it will make that clearer.


Yeah. She´s standing inside at the bar, so it should be
"When I saw you at the bar"

Thank you.
Reply With Quote