What do you do if a bird shits on your windshield?
Don't take her out again!
What's green, has a thousand legs and an IQ 0f 10?
A St Patrick's day parade.
Now that one is real ancient and arse
Jesus walks into a hotel and put's four nails on the reception counter, he asks "Can you put me up for the night?"
I have even crapper, do you wish me to continue?
What's the difference between Londerners and Smarties?
Smarties don't go bang in the tube!
(for those that need help it's reference to the London bombings on July 7th 2005)